The Story You Never Knew
by TokiioDoll
Summary: Wally West is your average high school jock, Rose Adams is your average teen geek, but the world knows them as Kid flash and Jinx. However, despite their meetings on campus & the battlefield neither of them are aware of the painful past they shared and the promises made as children. What will happen when the truth is revealed? Will their love slowly blossom or tear them apart? KFxJ
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: I do not own Teen titans, jinx, kid flash or any characters part of the DC nation. I only own THIS story-That's all.**

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Prologue

The air felt cold and heavy as I stared at the tiny candle lit in the corner of the attic, its light dimming by welcoming in the darkness. The other children slept somewhat peacefully in there ragged clothing on old rusty beds and the cold breeze that escaped our shattered window bit at my skin, making sleep impossible. I sat up slowly and brought my knees to my chest to keep warm. I could hear voices and movement coming from downstairs as I tried to distract my mind from the harsh reality that was my life. I shut my eyes and envisioned myself in a world far away from this prison. A world full of sunny days and peaceful nights. A world where they could not find me or hurt me any longer. . .

My Castle In the sky.

"Are you okay?" Someone asked, dragging me away from the paradise in my mind to return me back into the real world. My eyes flew open and I quickly turned to the red headed boy laying in the bed next to mine. I did not recognize him, and by his newly worn clothing I knew he wasn't like the rest of us.

"Why aren't you asleep?" I asked.

"Why aren't you?" He redirected my question, sitting up and blinking his deep blue eyes at me. I turned my attention away from him, focusing on the bit of light left in the corner, and hugged my knees tighter to stay warm.

"I'm Rudolph." The boy said as I glanced over to find him smiling at me. The cold didn't seem to bother him as much as the rest of us.

". . .What are you doing here?" My question didn't seem to make much sense to him as he tilted his head to the side in confusion.

"What do you mean? I'm waiting for my Aunt to come and take me home like everyone else." He explained.

"Like everyone else? What are you talking about? No one's coming for us. . ." I looked down at the stained sheets underneath me with the memory of my abandonment returning to my thoughts. I was unwanted and forgotten. Not even god himself could care for me anymore.

"But. . . what about your mommy and daddy?" He asked in a shaky tone, and I could see the sadness in his eyes that stared into mine.

"I don't have any. . . they didn't want me. . ." I shrugged.

"How come?" His question caught me off guard and the room fell silent for a moment. My eyes caught the reflection of myself in the pieces of glass that remained in the broken window at the end of the room. The pale skinned monster with raven black hair and deep brown eyes glared back at me, blaming me for the torment I'd endured for my failures. My abandonment, my punishments, my tainted vessel that was my body. . . I was to blame for it all.

What did I do? Where did I go wrong? What was wrong with me?

"Maybe I'm just bad luck. . ." I choked on my own words, unable to say anymore, and hid my face between my knees as the tears began running down my face. I bit my lip to stop myself from waking the others despite the tears overflowing and my body trembling from the cold and the heavy pain in my chest. It felt as if the tears would never stop until I felt a sudden sensation of warmth cover my body. When I looked up I found the red headed boy holding me with his blanket wrapped around my body, and the pain seemed to lessen for a moment.

"Don't cry. . ." He whispered, sobbing in my shoulder. "You can come live with me if you want. . ." He offered as I wiped my tears away and gently pushed him off of me.

"Don't be dumb. There's no way you're aunt would want me too. . ."

"She will!" He spoke loudly, making me jump and check around the room to see if anyone else had woken up. "I promise. I'll make sure no matter what my Aunt Iris takes you home with us." He spoke enthusiastically, wiping his own tears away.

"There's no way you can keep that promise." I rolled my eyes and turned back to my bed.

"Wait!" He grabbed my arm and reached for something in his pocket. "I'll prove it." He smiled, and pulled out a purple pendant necklace.

"What's that?" I shrugged as he dangled the piece of jewelry in front of me.

"It was my mom's. . . before she died. . ." He whispered the last part, and I was shocked to hear his words. A boy who seemed almost too happy for any regular human being had also been faced with such tragedies. My view of him had suddenly changed as I swiped the pendant from his hand.

"How does this prove anything?" I asked, as the smile on his face returned.

"Its a good luck charm."

 _"A good luck charm?"_ I repeated, raising my brow in suspicion as I examined the necklace carefully.

"As long as you where this you'll always be safe." He nodded, grabbing the hand I held the necklace in, "And as long as you keep it, I'll always be sure to keep my promise. That way you wont have to cry anymore." My heart raced in my chest by his words and my face began feeling warmer, making it difficult to keep eye contact with him.

"T-That's stupid." I said, but he only smiled wider and nodded.

"Maybe, but hold on to it just in case. You might not believe it but I have a feeling that if you keep it safe for me then you'll definitely be happy." My eyes found their way back to his and the smile on his face gave me a strange sense of a relief.

"Fine. . ." I nodded, placing the necklace in my pocket, "but if your wrong I'll make you pay." I threatened, but he only nodded and laughed nervously.

"So, what's your name?" He asked me, as I glanced at my reflection and sighed.

"Rose."

"That's super pretty!" He said, and I shrugged in response. "How old are you, Rosie?"

I glared at him and smacked his head before saying anything, "It's just Rose, and I'm seven."

"Ow. . ." He rubbed his head before his hand suddenly stopped and a smile grew on his face again, "Wait! You're seven? So am I-" I quickly covered his mouth with both hands and looked around the room once again.

"You're too loud." I whispered before pulling my hands away.

"Sorry. . .I'm seven too." He whispered back happily, and I couldn't help but laugh.

"You're such a dummy." I said and we both laughed quietly.

"I'm glad you finally smiled. It's nice." He said and I looked at him strangely.

"It's nice to see someone smile?"

"Yeah, but it's a lot more fun to see your friends smile." He said, and my eyes grew wide in shock.

"I'm. . . your friend?" I asked, hoping it had not been some sort of dream or misunderstanding.

"Of course you are!" He smiled at me. He reached over to hold my hand and the second we touched it felt as if the warmth and happiness he carried in his heart was being transported into mine by a single touch. I held onto his tightly, returning the smile as we sat happily in my bed.

"They're upstairs." The voice of our caretaker could be heard from the bottom of the house as the sound of footsteps came rushing into our domain. The door creaked open and I felt my heart drop when the intruders entered, waking all the other children in bed. Their eyes fell on every one of us, eventually landing on Rudolph and I sitting beside each other in bed. The men were dressed in plain black suits and hats, giving off a suspicious vibe before our caretaker came rushing behind them.

"What do you think you two are doing?" Our caretaker looked at us before rushing over and pulling Rudolph away from me, "You filthy child, trying to contaminate this innocent boy!" She yelled, placing Rudolph back in his bed.

"But I didn't-" My words were cut off by her frustrated expression and a slap to the face.

"How dare you talk back to me, you ingrate!" She shouted, dragging me by my hair and tossing me into the hands of the intruders. "You can have that one too." She told them, pulling ten more unfortunate children out of bed and into the clutches of the men in black.

"W-wait!" Rudolph spoke out, grabbing the woman's arm, "Rose didn't do anything! I swear it was-"

"Enough of that! Go back to your bed this instant!" She ordered, waving her hand at the men to take us away. They pushed us out the door and down the stairs, my eyes only able to catch one last glimpse of Rudolph's face in tears as he spoke to the woman before the door slammed shut. My heart sunk in my chest of not being able to see him smile one last time as they forced us out into the pouring rain. The men dragged us into the back of their vehicles, clumping us together in groups before shutting us in.

We sat in terror as the car began to move, children crying and screaming due to cold weather and the unexplained reasons as to why we were forced out of our home. The men yelled from the front to keep quiet, silencing everyone out of fear. The only one that would have caused any trouble was the blonde girl who sat beside me, sobbing in fear of what was to come next.

"Hey. . ." I whispered to her, as she looked up at me behind teary eyes. I reached in my pocket and pulled out the purple pendant I had received moments before and placed it in her hand.

"W-what is it?" She asked.

"It's a good luck charm. As long as you where it nothing bad will happen to you, okay?"

"Really?" She said, her sobs lessening as she looked at the necklace in her hands.

"I promise." I wiped away her tears, removing the blue butterfly clip in my hair and clipping it over her bangs to get a better look at the blue eyed blonde's face, "So you don't have to be afraid anymore."

"Yeah right." The dark skinned boy in the corner rolled his eyes at us.

"Don't listen to him, " I glared at him before turning back to the girl beside me, "I'll protect you no matter what, okay?" I reassured her, and she smiled in response. She rested her head on my lap and I stroked her hair to relieve her troubled thoughts, shutting my eyes to escape reality for a few moments. Returning to my castle in the sky filled with sunny days and peaceful nights. . . where I waited for a certain red headed boy to find me this time.


	2. Chapter 1: The Calm Before The Storm

Chapter 1: The Calm Before The Storm

Jinx P.O.V

 _My body felt limp and my lungs burned as I fought the urge to drop to the floor. The others ran quicker than me as I fought to allow myself to collapse while running hand in hand with a certain blue eyed blonde behind me. The alarms went off and echoed around the land, piercing our hearing as we moved faster toward the fence. The boys were only seconds away from reaching it with us putting the plan in jeopardy by falling far behind._

 _"C'mon Terra! We have to hurry!" I shouted, dragging the tired girl as quickly as I could the moment the non-human beings used as guards of this prison had spotted us._

 _"Rose!" Seymour screamed from the fence with the rest of the boys ready to escape the government prison we'd been forced into as test subjects years ago._

 _"Keep going!" I yelled back at them, Mammoth proceeding with the plan and using his strength to tear down the fence that had caged us in as children. Our escape was only moments away, yet voices in my head begged me to give up - mustering my strength._

 _"R-Rose. . ." She called out to me, pulling on to my arm, "You. . . have to catch up to them. . ."_

 _"_ We _have to catch up to them! Don't give up on me now!" I shouted, yanking her toward our exit and using every bit of strength to increase my speed._

 _"I-I can't go on anymore. . ." She released_ my _hand and fell to her knees from exhaustion._

 _"Terra!" I bent down to pick her up, my fear rising the closer the evil beings grew in order to return us back into their prison._

 _"I'm. . . sorry Rose. I can't drag you down with me. . . you have to. . . you have to escape!" Her sapphire eyes glowed a bright yellow color as she turned to face the tormenters who had kept us locked away for years. "I'll fight them off and buy you guys some more time."_

 _"I'm not leaving you!" I told her, grabbing her arm as she placed her hands on the back of her neck and removed the purple pendant necklace._

 _"I know you wouldn't. . ." She smiled, placing the necklace in my hands. "That's why I'm not giving you a choice."_

 _"What are you-"_

 _"Rose!" Seymour called, grabbing my wrist and yanking me toward the exit, "We don't have anymore time!"_

 _"I'm not abandoning her!" I screamed, fighting him off as he swooped me back into his arms and pulled me over his shoulder._

 _"Get her out safe, I'll stay here and keep them off your trail." Terra decided. Seymour looked at her for a moment, debating what to do before nodding and carrying me off with Terra left behind._

 _I screamed her named but she kept her back facing me the entire time, and eventually her figure became blurred behind my tears. I stared down at the necklace in my hand with the memory of the redheads words echoing in my mind and let the screams escape in remembrance of the lies and broken promises he'd made._

"Hey kid!" A strangers voice called and pulled me out of my nightmare. My eyes flew open and I gasped in terror from reliving my dark past before realizing where I was at the moment. I sat at the far end of the bus, the vehicle now empty with only the driver and I as the only remaining beings inside. I reached for my bag and caught a glimpse of my reflection in the window. A girl I hadn't seen in years disguised in a black double braided wig and a headband hid with dark brown eyes, hiding behind purple glasses, dressed in a sweater, jeans and a pair of converse. This was my attempt at a normal teenage life in hopes of distracting myself from my true reality.

"Sorry, sir!" I apologized to the driver, grabbing my things and walking to the exit.

"You alright, kid?" The driver asked before I stepped out, "You seemed like you were having a pretty bad dream back there." He mentioned, before I stepped off and watched him drive away.

"More like a bad memory. . ." I whispered to myself and stared at the school in front of me, filled with teens busy sulking and complaining about the end of summer vacation. I smiled at my chance of a new beginning, but before stepping on to campus the beeping of my communicator stopped me from going any further.

"Jinx speaking." I answered, bringing it up to my ear as I tried to steer clear from the other students by hiding behind a tree.

"Jinx, it's Seymour. Please tell me you were joking about the whole going to school thing? You can't seriously have gone out there on your own and put yourself at risk for the public to find you, right?" His tone was mixed with worry and annoyance by my actions as I let out a deep sigh.

"Seymour, I'm not like you idiots. I actually enjoy spending my time OUTSIDE rather then being cooped up playing videogames all day."

"Yeah, well at least it's safer here. You're only risking throwing away your freedom by doing this, don't you get that?" His words pierced my heart as the memories of our escape began overflowing my mind and infuriating me.

"Well we sure didn't risk escaping hell to waste away doing nothing but stealing banks and living unfulfilled lives! At least I'm trying to do something with my time, but you idiots don't understand how grateful you should be - it's not like we were all given a shot at freedom!" I fired back, catching my breath and fighting back the tears forming in my eyes.

". . .This is about terra isn't it? It's not like you killed her Jinx - the titans did! She got a chance at freedom and the titans took that away from her before we got the chance to see her again! Instead of wasting time at that stupid school why don't you spend it here on working on a plan in avenging her death!" His words left me without words for a moment, and I could only stand there and stare down at the purple pendant around my neck.

"Forget it. . ." He paused, "Just be sure not to get caught, with the titans away from the city we're all planning on swiping a few things from that museum we talked about before."

"Alright, I'll be sure to be there." I said, clutching the pendant around my neck, "I've been meaning to get some new jewelry lately."

"We'll talk later then. . . just be careful." He finished before hanging up. I sighed and quickly placed the communicator into my bag before removing the pendant and staring at it in my hand.

 _"If you keep it safe for me you'll definitely be happy."_

His words echoed in my head once again, reminding me of painful memories and broken promises.

"Liar." I whispered to the wind, shoving the pendant into my pocket before heading back to the entrance of the school. I shook my head to push away the past memories when I caught sight of a couple locking lips by a vending machine. A redheaded jock dressed in a sports jacket and some blonde bimbo had their bodies pressed against each other, sucking tongues and making my stomach churn. I ran past them and headed straight for the entrance. The moment the doors flung open my body collided with a group of female students looking down on me with dirty looks.

"Watch it freak!" One of the girls said, rolling their eyes as they walked over my things.

"Huh? So I'm a freak regardless of my powers?" I spoke to myself, putting my things back into my bag as I groaned at my footprint covered notebook, "But I'm a weak freak in this world. I should have figured." I shook my head and grabbed my stuff before taking out my schedule.

I followed the class numbers and ignored the awkward stares and hateful comments whispered around me. When I reached my first period Biology class I was once again given a cold welcome. The seats were placed in two's by tables, and everyone made it clear I wasn't welcomed to sit by them with every seat I passed. I finally reached the end of the room and found an empty table in the corner. I sat down quietly, placing my bag on the chair beside me, and ignored the rude behavior given to me when the bell rang.

"Alright, kids. Everyone take a seat." Our teacher came in, shutting the door behind him enthusiastically. "Let's begin this year positively, shall we?" The class groaned due to his positive energy and searched for a partner to sit by.

"C'mon guys, where's your energy?" He smiled and began writing his name on the chalk board, "My name's Mr. Fisher, and I hope you all have found a great partner to sit by, because that is the person you'll be working with for the rest of the year." The vibe of the class had suddenly flipped and became positive as the students cheered and high fived their buddies sitting next to them.

"Wait a minute. . ." He paused, pointing at me, "Miss, where is your partner?" He asked, and my heart sunk in my chest from the embarrassment I refused to show.

"I don't have one." I answered.

"Loner." A student coughed with the class laughing alongside him.

"That's impossible, this class was planned evenly so that-"

"Sorry I'm late." A voice cut in, swinging the door open and revealing the same redheaded boy I had caught sucking faces with one of the females students earlier.

"It's wally!" The girls squealed and the guys cheered, high fiving him and treating him as if he were some sort of god at the school.

"Ah, Mister West, I should have figured it was you who'd be missing. Tell me, where exactly have you been this whole time?"

"Nowhere special, just taking care of some business." Wally laughed, fist bumping the guys in the middle row dressed in the same jacket as him. He moved down the aisle until his eyes spotted mine for a moment and he immediately turned back to our teacher.

"Well, I'm glad you made it back. Please have a seat."

The redhead looked around confused for a moment, "Where?"

"Back there mister West. Right next to miss. . .Adams?" The teacher pointed at me, but the redhead refused to turn back and acknowledge my existence.

"I don't see anyone back there." He shrugged, playing dumb.

"Enough joking around West. Have a seat so that I can begin my class."

"Can't I just work alone? Chicks love the whole lone wolf thing." He begged, winking at one of the girls eyeing him in the front row.

"Now, West!" Fisher ordered, and the redhead groaned and moved to the back of the room to sit beside me. He dropped his books on our table and threw my bag off his seat to sit down. When the teacher began going over instructions the boy turned his eyes to me and stared until I noticed.

"Can I help you?" I raised a brow, my eyes meeting his deep blue ones that gave me a strange sense of familiarity before he flashed a flirtatious smile.

"I hope so. I mean with your brains you should get me an easy A, right?"

"If you do your share of the work we'll both pass." I said, fighting the urge to laugh as he wiggled his eyebrows.

"C'mon, you're not really going to make me do any of the work, are you?" He moved in closer, placing a hand on my leg.

"Yeah," I smiled, shoving his hand away, "I am."

His smile faded and his face turned serious as he backed up a bit, "Playing hard to get? Fine, but if flirting's not going to work on you then I could try a different approach."

"Oh really?" I turned away from him and faced the front of the room to pay attention.

"Yeah, like if you don't do my work then. . . I'll just make your life at school a living hell." He threatened me with a smile on his face that sent chills down my spine. I put on my best poker face and ignored his words, despite know that it held some truth due to his popularity on campus. Somehow I already knew what would await for me if I didn't obey his orders. I went from being in command to being bossed around in less than an hour and yet I still had the feeling that the worst was yet to come.


	3. Chapter 2: A Twist Of Fate

Chapter 2: A Twist Of Fate

Kid Flash P.O.V

"You're so perfect. . ." I stared down at the girl laying under me, emerald eyes catching mine as she melted and fell for every lie that escaped my lips. I caressed the side of her face and kissed her softly, pressing my body against hers on the bed. I pulled her closer, nipping her bottom lip and extracting small moans from the girl who rolled me over so that she could be on top.

I brought her lips back on mine, sneaking my hands under her pink top as she started attacking my neck. She pushed herself against me, grinding on me, and making it impossible for me to hold back any longer. I pulled her shirt off and pushed her back underneath me and started kissing down her neck and stomach when the buzzing of my cell phone suddenly rang.

"Don't answer." The brunette ordered, pulling me back up to kiss her. My hands eventually reached her jeans and I began unbuttoning them slowly before we were interrupted again by the beeping of the titans communicator. I groaned, annoyed by its call, and forced myself off of her to search for the device.

"Wally hurry up!" The girl demanded, killing the mood as I reached into my drawer for my communicator.

"Sorry, we're done here." I waved my hand at her, rummaging through my stuff in search for it.

"What the hell? You can't do this to me!" She whined.

"Man you're annoying."

"What did you just-"

"God Take a hint, Amanda!" I turned to her, "You're a mood killer!" I yelled and she responded by slapping me hard across the face.

"You're such a jerk Wally!" She cried and stormed off, stopping at the door for a moment to yell, "And my name's Alison!".

I groaned after finally finding the device at the far end of my drawer and brought it out to answer the call, waiting for Robin's image to appear on the screen before saying, "You better have a good reason for interrupting me tonight!"

"Sorry if I ruined your chances of satisfying your frequent male needs - but I need a favor." The raven haired boy asked and I moved over to fall back on my bed to finish the conversation.

"Shoot."

"I need you to patrol the city while we're away."

"Where are you guys going?" I asked, sitting back up on my bed.

"It's the Brotherhood of Evil but I'll fill you in later. Unfortunately, there isn't anyone else who can watch after the city while we're away so I need your help this time."

"Fiiiine!" I yawned, "Leave it to me, I'll suit up and head over - but you owe me one."

"Seriously?"

"You ruined my chances of getting laid tonight! So, how about you set me up with a certain redheaded alien and we'll be good." I grinned, laughing at the shade of red his face morphed into.

"Never going to happen!"

"Never say never." I laughed before he hung up.

I sighed, shutting off the communicator and getting out of bed to toss it back into the drawer. I threw it inside and put it away when my eyes fell on the picture frame of me and my parents on the top of my dresser. I smiled at the memories we shared, smiling happily at the park on a Sunday afternoon before I spotted the purple pendant around my mothers neck.

 _". . .I have a feeling that if you keep this safe for me you'll definitely be happy."_

 _"Fine. . .but if you're wrong I'll make you pay."_

My smile faded fast as I tried to fight the memories of that night before racing into the closet to change into my uniform. The words of a girl who disappeared off the face of the earth continued to echo in my head because of the promise I failed to keep. Despite my search for her there were no records held of the girl in the attic I met that night. Yet, the sadness in her eyes burned in the back of my mind as a constant reminder of the lies I had told that night. Lies that felt true at that moment but no longer held any meaning after all the years I had wasted. Even if she reappeared I wouldn't be forgiven. The broken promise I made to her that night had morphed me into the man I am today, and there was no going back from that now.

"I'm sorry. . ." I whispered, pulling my mask on before heading off to complete my duties.

* * *

The city lights were blurred as I zoomed past them several times on patrol. I sat by the entrance of a nearby shop and sighed when I noticed the clock inside that read 2:03 am. The streets were empty and quiet and not a single soul seemed to be out late at this hour as I sat around debating whether or not to head on home or wait another hour when my eyes landed on a flower shop in the corner. I gazed at the red roses piled together in a basket by the door and pulled one out carefully, smiling at the memory of _her_ when I suddenly noticed strange figures lurking in the corner of my eye.

My mind quickly returned to reality after the shadows began to move in the distance. I moved in closer, getting a better view of the strangely dressed group roaming the top of a local Museum suspiciously. I hid behind buildings and kept them in my sights at all times, watching them carefully plotting something. The moment they each jumped in through a hole on the roof I raced over to peek in to see they had already cleverly broken through the museums security system.

"Gold jewels, priceless artifacts. Way better than the Mall. Hive Five-rob 'em blind!" Their leader commanded as they separated and went about demolishing the museum.

I yawned, unamused, and began debating once again whether or not to storm in and stop them or wait patiently for the perfect moment to humiliate them. I laughed to myself as they went running amuck like children in a candy store, joking around and communicating like regular kids. It was almost hard to believe they were actually committing a robbery.

"Wonder what their story must have been like to get them stuck into this kind of work?" I thought to myself, creating different scenarios for each of them in figuring out how they had ended up where they were today.

". . .This is what I came for." A female voice announced as each member turned to look at their leader who managed to steal an amulet locked in a glass case with only the swish of her hand.

"Wait, isn't that amulet suppose to bring good luck? And if you're all about the bad luck. . .?" The one eyed kid asked his leader who slowly turned to face him. I leaned in closer to listen in on their conversation and got a better look at the girl with the bubblegum colored hair. I felt a sense of familiarity swept over me the moment I saw her face clearly and her beauty left me breathless as she stood holding up the amulet to her face. This had been the first time I'd ever seen the petite, pale skinned, cat eyed girl dressed in dark clothing. Yet, I felt as if I had seen her somewhere else before.

 _". . .Maybe I'm just bad luck."_

"It's just a dumb legend!" She said and shoved the boy out of her way as they all followed her to the exit. I pushed the memory away and tried to bury the girl in the attic at the far end of my mind in order to focus on the matter at hand.

I watched them from above, slamming the doors open and stepping out of the museum victoriously. I sighed and took the chance to speed through and take everything they had stolen back inside. Then after returning everything back into it's original place I rushed to the security system and set off the alarms before speeding back up to the roof and watching them run off confused in a panic. I laughed uncontrollably at their expressions until I realized a certain pink haired thief running off with the rose I left in her hand. I couldn't help but smile, amused at watching her leaving until I realized this might have been my last chance at seeing her while patrolling in town. The thought of that gave me an unpleasant feeling that I forced myself to shake off and forget about before racing home and creating a plan on fixing things up with Amanda. . . Addison? Or was it Ariana?


	4. Chapter 3: Lost Hope

Chapter 3: Lost Hope

Jinx

 _"Let me out of here!" I screamed in the tube they had placed me in, hitting the glass despite it being impossible to crack. The men in white jackets talked and joked while pressing buttons and discussing their plans. A small hole opened up from the end of the tube and began releasing a pink colored liquid inside as I cried and panicked that this would be the end of my life._

 _I struggled as the pink water began filling up inside, trying to keep myself up to breathe what little oxygen was left. I cried and looked around for an escape, or a way to save myself from this cruel fate, when I spotted something in the far corner. There she laid, the blonde haired girl I had arrived with earlier, laying on a silver table, lifeless. She wasn't breathing and there wasn't any color to her skin anymore. I cried thinking that would be my fate when I noticed the purple pendant in her hand. The pink liquid overflowed and consumed me as I banged my hands against the glass and screamed, turning to the girl one last time. I cried out to the men who surrounded her, treating her like a test subject rather than a human being. One of them injecting her with a bright colored liquid that made her veins begin to glow. I called to her, begging her to save me and not leave me behind. Then, in an instant, her eyes flew open and glowed a bright yellow color in my direction._

 _I called out to her, begging for her help when the tube I was placed in began to glow. I could feel myself running out of oxygen and the world slowly growing dimmer. The ends of the tube glowed a bright blue and I stared at them peacefully, floating, in what felt to be my last moments. A sense of relief and acceptance hit me then and I shut my eyes to await for death to take me. But before he came a burning shock stung my entire body as the ends of tube lit up and sent electric shocks into the water, burning every inch of my skin. I screamed and cried as the blonde haired girl reached out for me shakily. I fought through the pain and placed my hand on the glass, praying that if these were our last moments alive that we could leave this place together. Then, suddenly, the world fell dark and I had slowly slipped away into nothingness._

"Jinx!" A hand shook me and I screamed in terror of the memory I had relived once again. I cried in Seymour's arms and tried to come to terms with reality as I caught my breath.

"You okay?" He whispered, holding me tightly as I wiped my face and pushed him away.

"Sorry. . .what do you want?"

"I wanted to see if you were holding up alright. I know that since the whole school thing must be difficult, and that our plans in capturing that kid flash dude has been a bust every time - I just wanted to see if you were doing okay?"

"Yeah. . ." I nodded, recollecting all my failures in capturing the fastest boy alive countless times.

"Okay? Then what's up with keeping all the roses every time?" He pointed at the vase full of red roses in the corner of the room, left behind by the redheaded super hero who stood in our way of acceptance into the Brotherhood of Evil.

"Reminders. That's all." I convinced myself, ignoring Seymour's looks of suspicion.

"So, you don't like him then? Not even a little?"

"As if!" I punched his arm, "I'm only going after him to prove to the brotherhood of evil that we mean something. Once we're in we'll get respect and no one - not even the government will be able to stop us. Then we'll finally be in control and have the power to avenge Terra. . ." I stopped, knowing continuing any further with the memory of her would only bring more grief.

"I see, so it's all for Terra." He nodded and turned his back to me, "Then, let's make sure to capture that annoying do-gooder." He flashed a smile before running off to join the other guys in the living room. The door shut automatically and I let out a sigh of relief before falling back on my bed. I stared at the ceiling for a moment before my eyes wandered off at the roses piled in the vase left behind by a certain redheaded 'hero'.

 _"What do you know?" I rolled my eyes and folded my arms on my chest, setting the plan in motion._

 _"I know that you're too smart for all this." My heart reacted strangely by his words, but I shook the feeling off and focused on the original plan._

 _"Oh, is this the part where you try and convert me? Make me see the error of my ways? You're wasting your time." I waved him off, placing my hands on my hips._

 _"When you're as fast as me, time is something you've got plenty of." He snapped his fingers and sped out of the room only to return a second later with a paper bag and a stupid hat on his head. "croissant?"_

 _"It's too late for me anyway. . ." I tried convincing myself, turning away from the redhead._

 _"It's never too late." I stopped where I stood, biting my lip and refusing to believe in his words. Reminding myself what I had originally come here to do._

 _"W-What about the hive five? They'd come after me?"_

 _"Let me worry about them." He smiled confidently._

 _"Where will I go? What will I do?" I asked, playing the damsel in order to lure him into my trap._

 _"Trust me." He extended his hand to me and I lost track of everything for a moment. His smile felt warm and his words gave me a strange sense of hope for a moment. A chance that something more could exist for me. Then the memories of the past came pouring back and before I could take his hand I was reminded of the harsh reality that created my existence._

 _"On second thought - nah!"_

I opened my eyes and turned to the side of my bed, removing Kid flash from my head. I sat up and pulled out my agenda from my school bag, flipping through dates to figure out what needed to be done. My eyes fell on tomorrows date and I groaned at the idea of being forced to do two assignments to cover my own and the schools famous Wally West.

"I'll definitely be happy, huh?" I held the pendant in my hand and tossed it to the floor. "I was an idiot to believe you."


	5. Chapter 4: Meeting Linda Park

Chapter 4: Meeting Linda Park

Kid flash

The clouds hovered in the sky, blocking the sun and dimming the world for a few moments. The lesson went on like usual, and the world kept spinning like usual, but I was too occupied to pay attention to any of it.

 _"I'm bad luck. Good was never an option for me."_

 _"Maybe I'm just bad luck. . ."_

No matter where I turned to, wherever I went, she was always there. I saw her in the eyes of every girl I was with, every female I passed, every child I saw, and especially. . .in jinx. Maybe that's why I've had such an obsession with saving her from the path she's chosen. Maybe I'm hoping that if I can at least save her, I'll have been able to keep my promise in a way. But in all honesty I already know that at the very end it won't change what I did. I allowed them to take her away that night, I could have fought harder but I gave up halfway out of fear. . . and that is the biggest regret I'll have to live with for the rest of my life.

"Mister West!"

"The answer's seven!" I shouted and received a smack in the head with the chalk board eraser.

"This is Biology Mister West." Mr. Fisher shook his head and sighed while the rest of the class laughed and headed out after the bell rang.

"Hey dweeb, don't forget to finish my-"

"West!"

"cupcakes!" I finished, turning away from my lab partner to face our Bio teacher who stood behind us furiously.

"West, answer me this honestly. . .have you been allowing Miss Adams to do your part of the work in my class too?"

"What?" I laughed nervously, "Of course not, fisher dude. She and I are partners - we work together."

"Yes, well, unfortunately Mister West I've read both your work and they're quite similar. So, unless you want me to fail you both in my class I suggest-"

"What!? You can't fail me, Fish! I'll be kicked off the team!" I panicked.

"You should have thought of that before, Mister West. Luckily I'm willing to give you both a chance by requiring you spend at least 1 hour of tutoring in the library after school 3 times a week."

"Three?" My jaw dropped, as I sunk in my chair.

"Yes, three. So if you want a spot on that team I suggest you stick with what I give you and be grateful I don't fail you." He finished and dismissed us for second period. We headed out of the classroom and waited for him to step away from the door before I could grab the girl and pull her into the boys bathroom.

"Alright, why'd you tell him?" I asked, checking to make sure no one else was with us.

"I didn't say anything. We came into class around the same time. Don't you think you would have seen me speak to him if I had said anything?" I opened my mouth to argue back at first but nothing would come out and I had no choice but to give up.

"Great. So now we're stuck with each other!" I kicked the stall annoyed, dropping my bag on the ground.

"I'm heading back to class." She rolled her eyes at me and headed towards the exit when her body suddenly collided into another.

"What the hell!?" A male voice echoed in the bathroom and I could feel my heart sink the moment I saw a few of the guys on the team entering and staring at the two of us in the middle of the room.

"I-I told you to quit following me!" I panicked, and I could feel her glaring eyes shooting right at me. "Why can't you take a hint? There's no way I could ever be interested in a freak like you." I finished, laughing with the rest of the guys as she ran out of the bathroom in embarrassment.

"That's West for ya! Always managing to break the hearts of every maiden at this school." One of them joked through the their annoying laughter and I couldn't help but feel a tinge of guilt of what I had just done again. On the streets people saw me as a hero but in the real world. . . I was nothing but fraud. A disgrace to my title.

I stormed past the guys and left them laughing like idiots. There was no way I could ever make up what I just did, or fix the sins I've committed in the past. I just needed to learn to live with them and the consequences I'd have to face in the future. What more can I do? What more can I lose? My pride? My identity? My friends? None of that mattered now. . .

The beeping of my communicator brought me to a stop and I pulled away from my thoughts to hide behind one of the vending machines in the hall to answer, "Kid flash speaking." I whispered, holding up the device and waiting for an image to appear on the screen.

"KF I need you here for a titans meeting tonight. Can you make it?" The boy wonder asked without his usual mask on.

"Yeah I'll be there. What's going on?"

"It's the brotherhood of evil, they've been behind a series of crimes lately and we all need to figure out a way to put this to an end." Said the raven haired boy.

"Alright but. . .are you doing alright?" I asked after quickly noticing the bags underneath his eyes.

"Yeah. . ." He yawned, "Just taking care of hero business. The brotherhoods been a lot to handle lately so just be sure to make it here on time." He finished before signing out. I sighed at the extra work piled up on my plate of responsibilities while heading to second period after the bell rang. The halls were empty and I leaned against the lockers to debate whether or not to head back to class or not. There were too many thoughts coursing through my mind to focus on school at the moment and I couldn't find a solution for any of them. The team, my grades, the brotherhood, or jinx. . . it was all starting to suffocate me.

"Excuse me?" Someone patted my shoulder and I flipped around to find an unfamiliar face standing behind me. A dark haired girl stood there holding her books and a class schedule, implying that she wasn't too familiar with the school. She was tall, slim and breathtakingly beautiful but I was far too busy in thought to care or pay too much attention.

"Yeah?"

"Do you happen to know where room 214 is?" She asked with hopeful eyes.

"Keep heading down the hall and once you've reached the end make a left and you should see it." I explained, using my hands to direct her.

"Thank you so much." She gave me a friendly smile before putting her schedule away and extending her hand to me, "I'm Linda, Linda Park." She greeted and I shook her hand politely. It wasn't anything out of the ordinary and she didn't seem like anything new in my eyes, but the moment our hands touched I felt a strange connection with the girl.

"West? Wally west." I told her, trying to shake off the strange feeling she sent.

"Well, wally west, thank you again and I hope we bump into each other again." She said before disappearing down the hall.

I stared down at my hand thinking about the odd sensation she made me feel. I couldn't seem to shake off the feeling completely, but I was certain she was someone I should keep my eye on. As I tried pushing her to the far back of my mind I headed to my next class and focused on my main priorities when I caught a glimpse of my lab partner sitting in her second period class. I groaned and stomped away at the reminder of wasting away precious hours with one of the lamest females on campus.


	6. Chapter 5: Left Without A Choice

Chapter 5: Left Without A Choice

Jinx

The moon blanketed it's glow with it's surrounding clouds, shielding the world from complete darkness. I sat on the roof of a tower and stared at the quiet city below me. I curled myself up to hug my knees as the icy cold air pricked at my skin like needles. I cursed at the wind for my failures and reckless decisions made in the past. My moments of weakness and doubts of abandoning my only family for the side of "good". However, the truth of the matter is that the justice they sought out to maintain were lies. They worked under the authority of their government, the same government that created the monster I am today. The government that took the lives of innocent children through tests and torture. How could I ever become one of them when they fought for the very thing I despised?

"I'm such an idiot." I wiped away the tears forming in my eyes and stood back on my feet. My determination to prove to Madame Rouge that I could stand by her side as an equal despite my failures and the words of the "hero" that had been attempting to reel me in to join him.

"So what's the plan?" Mammoth spoke out while the others sat around impatiently behind.

"She doesn't have one stupid!" Gizmo commented, irritated by the silence.

"Jinx maybe we should head back home. Why should we need to go to so much trouble for something like this anyways?" See-more said, placing a hand on my shoulder before I shook him off.

"Then you can leave. You can all quit if you want, but I'm not giving up on this family. . .not again. I'm going to get us the respect and power we deserve!" They all looked at me in shame and bowed their heads before Billy broke the awkward atmosphere.

"So then uh. . . what's the plan again?" He asked, scratching his head in confusion and looking at each of us for an answer.

"We lure them out."

"How?" They each said simultaneously and waited for an answer.

I sighed at their cluelessness and moved away from their side. I shut my eyes and turned my back towards the edge of the tower, taking in a deep breath. I brought my arms out, swallowing my fear and ignoring the racing of my heart, before allowing myself to drop and fall into the air. My body unable to defy gravity as I sunk deeper, nearing the pavement floor. I opened my eyes only seconds before death could take me and threw myself crashing through a window into an empty building. I rolled on the ground a few times before stopping and pushed myself off the ground. I laughed to myself the moment the alarms set off and I slowly moved downstairs to the main entrance of the shop, shaking the pieces of broken glass from out of my hair.

I kicked the door down and stepped onto the streets, looking around and waiting patiently for the titans to arrive and sending hexes to every vehicle and building in the area in hopes of catching their attention. There was only one way of proving myself now and that was by taking one of the five titans as my hostage by dragging them back to our headquarters. This time there would be no mercy, no hesitance, no doubts. The others called to me in panic and worry for my recklessness but I could only remain focused on the glowing T tower in the ocean, waiting for them to arrive. It was only a matter of seconds when the alarms shut off and an unexpected voice appeared.

"So this is your decision?" He stood by a fire hydrant in his usual uniform looking far more disappointed then our last meeting.

"What are you doing here?" I hissed, taking on a fighting stance.

"Isn't it obvious?" He winked, dashing over before I could even blink, "I couldn't keep away from you beautiful."

"Then it's your funeral!" I retored, sending a light hex his way while he smiled cheekily and swiftly dodged it.

"C'mon jinxy? I thought we were making some progress here?" He grinned a few feet away.

"You thought wrong!" I quickly sent hex after hex but failed to cause any harm as he zipped around the streets mocking me.

"Stay still!" I yelled before I noticed movement above me and spotted the titans attack on the rest of my crew.

"Don't take your eyes off of me." Kid flash appeared in front of me, gripping onto both of my arms.

"Let go of-"

"What happened to walking away from this?" He asked, his face now serious.

"Like I'd ever abandon my family."

"They're not your family jinx! Family doesn't bring out the worst in people and that's all they do to you! You made a choice back there when you decided not to turn me into the brotherhood of evil. You can still walk away from this-"

"Shut up!" I shouted, hexing him and sending him flying into a brick wall.

"I don't get it. . . Why are you so set on making this difficult on yourself!" He yelled, picking himself from off the ground.

"Because. . . I'm bad luck-"

"Don't start with that!" He pointed at me, "Don't use your powers as an excuse for choosing to walk down this path. You have the choice to be good - you always have! You choose not to because. . . because-" He fell to his knees, shaking on the concrete, after I aimed another hex at his chest.

"Because what?" I snapped, "You think I chose to be this way? That I came down this path because I wanted to become like this?"

"Well I mean. . ."

"You don't know anything about me or them!" I pointed at the group battling above us, "You're right. Maybe I do I have a choice now, but if you think the path I've chosen is worse then the one you walk on then you're sadly mistaken. I would much rather fight along the side of 'evil' then the side you call 'good' because we're far less corrupted then the rest of you!"

"Are you serious right now? You're making it sound like harming innocent lives is greater than saving them!"

"No, that's just how you heroes choose to look at it, but have you ever stopped to think about who you're serving by doing all of this?" I asked, as he looked at me confused for a few seconds before answering.

"What do you mean? We serve our community, families, friends, society, government-"

"Exactly!" I yelled, raising my hand in his direction ready to shoot at him, "You're filthy government that only uses the rest of you to clean up their mess. The mess they created by pushing me and the rest of us down this path of 'evil'. They used us, toyed with us, tested on us, and morphed us into what we are today. I never wanted these powers. . . I never wanted any of this!" The tears stung my eyes and his figure became blurred as I struggled to keep my hand up.

"Jinx. . ."

"They took the lives of thousands of children and destroyed the ones that survived by turning us into monsters! So don't you dare stand there and lecture me about what your side might have to offer when you fight under the authority of the greatest evil of all!" I yelled, shutting my eyes and aiming a hex at every direction.

"Jinx stop!" An arm grabbed me from behind and I opened my eyes to find see-more standing behind me, "We have to go!" He pulled my arm as we followed the others retreating back to Headquarters.

"Jinx wait!" Kid flash cried out from the end of the street but I could only catch a glimpse of him holding himself up by a wall, his hand reaching out for me behind the smoke and destruction created due to my madness. I wiped the tears away and started running with the rest, accepting defeat for the day and pushing the redhead out of my thoughts. I could no longer allow him to toy with my emotions or thoughts. I couldn't allow him to affect me any more than he already had, or fear losing the family I had worked years to maintain because without them. . . I had nothing.


	7. Chapter 6: Her Savior?

Chapter 6: Her Savior?

Kid Flash

There was chaos in the classroom. The desks in jumbles, the trashcan overturned, the slamming of a book, and the hoarse voice of our teacher yelling at everyone to stay seated. A speck of sunlight beamed off my phones digital clock as everyone anxiously waited for the bell to ring. The window revealed clear skies with a slight breeze running through the branches of trees outside, declaring the perfect weather for a Tuesday afternoon.

"Freedom!" One of the guys yelled the moment the bell went off to dismiss our sixth period. Everyone laughed at his idiocy before rushing out of the classroom in a bundle. The rest of the world ready to enjoy the day without a care in the universe while I struggled to focus on anything other than my encounter with jinx the night before.

 _"You don't know anything about me or them. . ."_

 _"So don't you dare stand there and lecture me about what your side might have to offer when you fight under the authority of the greatest evil of all!"_

Nothing she said made sense anymore - none of it. She claimed to enjoy the side she fought for and yet the sadness in her eyes told me something completely different. Despite her actions and keeping me away I could feel something within her, something screaming for salvation. There was still a small shred of hope lingering in her heart, it was small but still there and I could feel it and yet she refused to let me in. . .

"Hey West!" One of the guys on the team called, pulling me by my shoulder.

"Oh, hey Gary." I nodded at him and continued walking with him following beside me.

"What's wrong with you?" He nudged, forcing me to push my problems to the side in order to maintain my high school demeanor.

"Nothing man, just trying to figure out ways to kill time for the rest of the day."

"I got you covered, bro. There's a party tonight at Jakes pad - you in?"

"Sure." I shrugged, heading to the front gates and thinking over what needed to be done for the rest of my day today.

"Wally!" A strangely familiar voice called out and I quickly glanced over at the dark haired beauty rushing to my side.

"Linda. . .?" I said slowly, hoping to get it right.

"You remembered." She smiled, "You headed anywhere special?"

"Not really-"

"But there's a pretty special party he's headed to tonight if you wanna crash?" Gary cut in, patting my back and shoving me closer to the girls side."Sounds like a fun way to meet new people." She nodded.

"Well if you plan on going we could probably hang out I guess." I said, making her face flush a bright red color.

"Sounds like a plan..." She nodded.

"Awesome, what time do you plan on-"

"West!" Someone yelled at the end of the hall.

"Here comes your stalker." Gary sang, nodding at the irritated four-eyed female marching toward us.

"What are you doing?" The girl asked, stopping in front of us.

"Leaving?" I shrugged.

"Did you forget our after school plans?" She reminded me, adding more stress to my life.

"Back off freak." Gary cut in, shoving her away lightly, "You don't stand a chance."

"And I don't want one." She glared at him, "I just want to pass my class, and if you feel the same way then I'll be waiting in the library." She finished before heading the opposite direction from where we stood.

"That girl's got it bad." Gary laughed before I joined in to cover up what was really going on.

"Yeah, I have that affect on women." I joked, looking at Linda who watched the other girl disappearing down the hall.

"Who was that?" She asked, turning to us.

"Just a nobody." Gary shrugged.

"Yeah, well I have to head to the library." I said, trying to escape without causing any more suspicion.

"Why? You into the glasses wearing type?" Gary stopped me.

"Yeah, right!" I laughed, "But I should probably let her down easy and make sure she quits bugging me."

"Alright? I'll see you later then." He nodded before heading to the front gates.

"See you at the party." Linda smiled before following him to the exit. I waved goodbye, waiting for them to vanish from my sight before trudging down the hall to meet with one of the last people I wanted to see at the moment.

 _"I never wanted these powers. . .I never wanted any of this!"_

I leaned against the lockers and stared at the ceiling, remembering the bubble gum pink haired girl I'd fought countlessly to save. Her words and eyes spoke two different things, but the pain could be felt in both regardless of her actions. And I knew that by saving her I'd only be placing myself at an even higher risk, but if I were to succeed I might be able to move past everything from before. If I were to become her savior, could I be forgiven? Would it make up for the wrongs I've done? The promises I couldn't keep? It might bring me some closure in the end. . . but it wouldn't change the reality of it.

I'd only be fooling myself.


	8. Chapter 7: No More Doubts

Chapter 7: No More Doubts

Jinx

I sat alone by an empty table staring impatiently at the doors constantly opening and closing, letting a musty smell enter from down the halls. The clock ticked away as the librarian eyed me suspiciously and gave off an unwelcoming vibe. I laid my head on the table, cursing my Bio teacher, and fighting the urge to murder the boy who kept me waiting. My mind had already been pre-occupied with other things like keeping the team together, joining the brotherhood of evil, and destroying kid flash permanently. Yet, despite all my attempts I had failed miserably at everything and that fact didn't seem like it would change any time soon. . .

"Hey freak." A certain redhead called, taking the seat next to mine.

"You're late."

"I'm here now aren't I?" He shrugged.

"Look, I know you don't want to be here and neither do I - but I have my own life to get back too." I whispered, ignoring the stares we'd been receiving from the librarian supervising us from across the room.

"You don't think I-"

"I'm sure you do too," I cut him off, "which is why you shouldn't waste _either_ of our precious time. I have enough on my plate as it is, and this after school thing isn't helping me - especially when you're running off and making me wait on you." I said sternly.

"I'm sorry. . ." He apologized, staring down at the table to avoid meeting my eyes, "It won't happen again."

"Good." I nodded, grabbing my bag and reaching for my Bio notes.

"So, how do we start this?" He asked.

"Well we can start by going over some-ow!" I cried out, dropping my bag on the ground due to a sudden burning sensation shooting across my arm. I turned away from him slightly, and carefully folded up my sleeve before removing the blood stained bandage to examine the wound I'd received the night before.

"What's wrong?" The redhead asked, moving in closer.

"It's nothing." I shook my head, hiding the gash across my arm and reaching in my bag for another bandage.

"It's not nothing- " He grabbed my shoulder and forced me to turn to him, "What happened?" He asked in concern, taking my injured arm to better view my injury and making me shudder by his touch.

"Don't touch me!" I screamed, shoving him away and hiding my arm under the table.

"I'm just trying to help. . ." He held his hands up in defense.

"I don't need your help." I hissed, reaching for a bandage in my bag and carefully placing it over my wound.

"Okay. . .so what happened?" He asked again.

"Nothing, just a little accident- "

"Did the guys do that to you?" He tried to guess.

"It doesn't matter what happened. Let's just-"

"It does matter." He cut me off again.

"Why?" I asked, taking my notes out and placing them on the table.

"Because you're a girl." He said.

"Your point?"

"My point is that I'm not okay with _any_ guy putting his hands on a girl - especially a scrawny looking one like you." He explained.

"Okay? But weren't you the one who threatened to make my life hell at this school?" I reminded him, confused by his strange behavior.

"I meant socially not physically. What kind of guy do you take me for?" He asked, offended by my words.

"Do you really want me to answer that?"

"Look," He paused to lean in closer, "I know we don't like each other and all but it's not like I hate you or anything." He whispered while checking the area to make sure no one had heard his words.

"Of course not." I laughed, opening up my notebook to begin our session.

"I'm serious."

"It wasn't you're stupid friends who did this, okay?" I whispered, "I accidentally fell on some glass that's all."

"Honest?" He nudged.

"Yes, now shut up already. If we don't get started the librarian won't sign our tutor trackers and then we won't have proof we were actually here."

"Alright, Alright." He nodded, and pulled his bag on the table to begin.

"Okay, so I think we should start with- " I was interrupted by a strange beeping noise coming from his bag.

"Hold that thought. . ." He said, searching through his bag.

"Can't you answer it later?"

"Um. . ." He froze in his seat, "C-Can we take a quick break?"

"We haven't even-!"

"I know, but I'll be quick. It's an emergency, please!" He pleaded.

"Fine, hurry up."

"It'll only take a sec." He said before rushing out of the library with his school bag.

"I don't see why you need to take you're whole bag to answer a phone call. . ." I thought to myself before the sound of my own communicator began beeping in my bag. I sat up and quickly reached to answer but was stopped by the glaring librarian watching me from across the room. I pushed my pencil off the table and waved at the woman awkwardly before leaning down to the floor to answer my call.

"This better be important."

"Jinx you have to come back now!" See-more's voice came through.

"I can't I have to-"

"The brotherhood of evil called for an important meeting tonight. You have to come here right now!"

"The brotherhood. . .?" I glanced at the librarian eyeing me suspiciously, "Alright, I'll head over soon." I nodded before hanging up.

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing!" I jumped, reaching for the pencil on the ground to find Wally standing behind me, "Oh, it's just you." I sighed in relief.

"Yeah, look, something important came up at home and I have to-"

"Leave? Me too! Let's pick this up tomorrow or something." I patted his shoulder and grabbed my things.

"Alright?"

"Don't be late next time!" I yelled and rushed out of the room in a hurry.

I ran down the halls and off campus with a tinge of excitement growing in my chest. The pain in my arm, the exhaustion due to lack of sleep, and the doubt a certain hero had shoved in my brain had vanished in an instant. There was no worry or stress because for the first time in a long time _hope_ was beginning to blossom again. One simple phone call and suddenly all my energy had been restored, because for the first time in a _long_ time. . .

 **I felt like there was some place I could belong.**


	9. Chapter 8: Could it Be

Chapter 8: Could It Be

Kid Flash

The world fell cold and silent, yet still alluring to my eyes. The mountain view, the millions of stars twinkling above, and the moon's light traveling through the night sky created a lovely scene. Despite the fact that it had been hours since my arrival, and that there was no sign of the Hive Five anywhere in sight, the view itself made the trip worth it.

"They should be arriving soon." The boy wonder told the rest of his team.

"Man, that's what you said an hour ago!" Cyborg complained, sitting against a rock.

"Dude, Let's just go in and end this already." Beast boy suggested, pointing to the abandoned warehouse the Hive Five were said to be meeting with the rest of the Brotherhood and their followers of criminals.

"We can't. There's a reason the brotherhood of evil is bringing in all these criminals They're meeting up to plot something and until we find out what that something is we can't do anything but wait." Robin explained.

"But I'm bored!" Beast boy whined, dropping to the ground.

"Maybe they're not coming? Maybe they backed out or something?" I said, stepping in to join the conversation.

"Not likely. I tapped into their system and they had set to arrive here a few hours back." Cyborg said, tapping the buttons on his arms.

"Perhaps they have gotten lost?" Starfire said, sitting beside beast boy on the ground.

"This is a waste of time. We might miss our chance to attack by just sitting around here all day." Raven spoke up while mediating in the air.

"C'mon, Rob. The Hive Five isn't that serious a threat anyway. Let's focus on taking down those guys first." I pointed at the warehouse swarming with criminals inside.

"Are you only saying that because you're eager to fight? Or is it because you don't want to have to go head to head with jinx again?" The boy wonder asked suspiciously.

"What are you talking about?"

"I've seen the two of you battling. You're always busy chatting with her that you never actually try to strike, even when she leaves herself open."

"Well. . ." I shrugged, "I just think she isn't as bad as she claims to be. I think she just got mixed up with the wrong kind of people and is too scared to leave because she doesn't feel she can be accepted anywhere else-"

"She won't be. She's a criminal who needs to be brought to justice." Robin said sternly.

"I know that! But I think if she was given a second chance she could-"

"Why are you defending her?" Robin eyed me suspiciously, making the others stop to stare at what I had to say next.

"I-I'm not! I just. . ."

"You like her." He gaped at me.

"What?" I shook my head, "No, I just want to help her."

"Because you like her?" Cyborg looked at me.

"No!"

"Then quit wasting time chatting and prove it. I don't want you letting her get away this time." Robin warned.

"I don't need you to tell me how to do my job." I turned my back to him, "And FYI, I prefer redheads." I grinned, eyeing Starfire sitting on the grass flirtatiously as we all watched Robin's face flush a bright red.

"KF you better not-"

"They're here!" Beast boy shouted, pointing at the helicopter moving toward the warehouse. We watched it land in front of the building, sending dust flying in the air, as we waited for someone to step out.

The boys of the Hive Five came jumping out one at a time from the bear sized being named mammoth to the demonic child known as gizmo. They stood around for a few minutes, laughing and arguing like children and calling out to the last being who remained in the aircraft to come out. She quickly silenced their calls with a simple hex that sent them flying a few feet away before she jumped out. The bubblegum haired girl glowed underneath the moonlight, looking as radiant as ever, while lecturing the rest of her teammates before they entered the building.

"Now we move." Robin commanded, as the rest of the team followed him.

"Yeah, I'll just wait for you guys over there." I said before zipping past them and waiting by the back end of the building for them to catch up.

I moved carefully around looking for a back entrance, an opened window, or anything that would allow me access to enter without being seen. After a few seconds of searching my eyes soon caught glimpse of a rusty ladder attached to the side of the building. My impatience, and the fact the others were still far behind, brought me to venture to the top on my own.

Once my feet were standing on the roof I waved to the others to let them know it was safe before exploring further. I immediately spotted an old door attached to the floor and bent down to better examine it. There was no lock or latch, just a rusty handle to pull it open. I debated whether or not to wait for the others or peek inside on my own, but because the voices of those inside could be softly heard through the door, and because of the control my curiosity had over me, I decided to peek in and listen in on their conversations.

I slowly opened the door a few inches and watched the dozens of villains arguing like maniacs or chatting like good old friends who hadn't spoken in years inside the building. Most looked challenging, others made me laugh, but the one I couldn't take my eyes off was the petite girl with bubblegum hair. She stood annoyed by her teammates and the yammering of all the people in the building. Her reactions entertained me and her irritated expression amused me - _until_ her cheeks flushed a bright pink color after a certain stranger approached her. . . and that irritated _me_.

"Lucky?" A redheaded boy called to her, dressed in heavy, blue, clothing with a beanie and a scarf wrapped around his neck.

"Leo?" She blushed before he placed a hand over her mouth.

"Shh! It's Kid Kold - ow! " He told her before she zapped his hands with a quick hex.

" _Kid Kold,_ you of all people know better than to touch me without my consent!" She growled, yanking him by his scarf with her eyes glowing a bright pink color.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" He cried, holding his hands up in defense before she shoved him away.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, placing a hand on her hip.

"What do you mean? I was called in to join the big leagues." He grinned.

"The Brotherhood of Evil actually called you in to join?"

"Don't act so surprised. I've seen your team and by the looks of it I can already tell that after leaving me it all went downhill for you, huh, lucky?" He muttered, watching her teammates arguing with one another like a group of idiots.

"Well, considering what a lowlife you are, I think it's better in comparison." She shrugged.

"Ouch- that was cold, lucky."

"Quit calling me that-it's jinx!" She shouted, "This is the reason I dumped you in the first place. You were ten times more annoying than the rest of my team combined."

"No, the reason we broke up was because of all the baggage you carried. I couldn't even lay a hand on you without you flipping out. You just have way too many issues to- " She cut him off with another hex that sent him flying across the room. Everyone in the building stared at her for a moment before the room began buzzing with chattering and arguments. However, she didn't seem to care too much about the looks she'd received, but for a quick second, before she had sent that kid flying, there was a tinge of sadness lurking in her eyes. His words had affected her deeply, and despite the brave face she forced on, she was hurt by what he had said, and it pained me to see her that way. . .

"You ready?" Raven crept up from behind, making me jump from shock.

"Don't do that!" I whispered loudly, noticing her violet hair shimmering in the moonlight.

"Robin and Starfire are waiting by the front, and beast boy and cyborg have the back ready to attack." She explained.

"But they haven't started their meet-"

"Shh!" She shoved her hand over my mouth and pointed to the center of the room. The building fell silent as every body stopped and stared at the woman standing in front of their eyes. The tall, slender, raven-haired Russian who sent shivers down their spines the moment they met her eyes.

"You have all been called here for an important meeting in regards of joining ze bruzerhood." She spoke in her Russian accent, eyeing each individual that stood before her. "If you do not vish to vork alongside us, and are too busy second guessing, then leave now. But know that vee do not give, nor do vee believe, in second chances. . ." She paused and stared at jinx standing by the corner, "If you leave vee vill take it that you have chosen to vork against our cause, and thus vill forever be a target if you stand in our vay. Is that clear?"

"Be ready." Raven whispered, violet eyes meeting mine as the rest of her face fell back into darkness after placing her hood back on.

"The choice is yours." The woman rolled her tongue, waiting for someone to do something. "Good, we all agree? Then let us begin." She nodded and walked to the front of the building.

"I think this is it?" I whispered, waiting for the woman to continue speaking.

"Our plan is simple- destroy every titan on dis planet." She grinned as everyone began whispering, "How? It is a complex plan that I vill personally explain to each of you _individually_. In the mean time, you must understand that in order for dis to vork ve vill need each and everyone vun of you." She looked around the room, "Zen shall we continue?"

The room roared and cheered for the woman, praising her, as she smiled and waved for them to settle down. Once the room fell silent they waited for her to speak in excitement, but before she could say any more they stopped and fell to the ground as the room shook and the back wall began to crumble, due to a certain green gorilla who stood by the newly made hole in the wall.

"Sorry, but we're going to have to cut this party short." Cybrog grinned, standing by beast boy as they waited for Robin to come bursting through the other end of the room.

"Titans go!" He yelled before heading off into battle.

"That's our queue." Raven said before flying down through our door.

"I better get this over with then." I sighed, ready to fight before spotting the raven-haired Russian watching me from below before moving toward jinx.

"You stupid child!" She shouted before slapping jinx hard across the face, "Dis vas your doing!"

"I wasn't part of any of this!" Jinx fired back.

"Then explain that!" The woman pointed at me from below. "Why is it that the only time vee meet in person he happens to tag along den?" The woman scoffed and headed for the exit.

"Damn it!" I cursed at myself, zipping down and blocking the front exit before she could escape.

"Vhat? Do you vish to go for another round vith me?" The woman laughed, taking on a fighting stance.

"You know I get why you'd attack the good guys. Why you'd attack you're own kind, though, is beneath me."

"Dat child is a disgrace," She pointed at jinx, "So, do not dare put me in da same category you-"

"Hya!" Robin attacked from behind, knocking the woman out cold with one swing.

"Less talking-"

"More fighting, I know. Now shoo!" I waved him off as he glared at me before running back into battle.

"This is all your fault. . ." Jinx whispered in the corner, her eyes and hands glowing a bright pink color.

"Woah, jinxie. I think you might need to cool off a bit. . ." I laughed nervously, taking a few steps back to get a running start.

"Why do you keep ruining everything for me!" She screamed, throwing a hex my way that was almost too fast to dodge.

"How am I ruining anything for you? You're the one who keeps putting yourself in these stupid situations!" I yelled, zipping over to her side.

"You just don't get it! You're too busy trying to wreck every opportunity I get!"

"Opportunity? To what? Getting yourself locked up?" I joked, poking at her pride as she swooped in and kicked me to the ground.

"They may not mean much to you, and they may not make sense- but this was important to me!" She cried, placing a foot over my chest.

"You don't belong there jinx!"

"And where else do I belong? With you and your kind? I'm not a good guy and I don't enjoy doing good for others. Why can't you understand that?" She shouted, ready to aim a hex at my head before I pushed her off and brought her to the floor.

"Because you're more than this!" I told her, pinning her arms down on the ground.

"Don't you get it already? Without the brotherhood of evil I'm nothing. . ." She whispered, tears slowly forming in her eyes.

"That isn't true, jinx. You can be so much more than-" Unable to finish or speak any further, my thoughts were lost for a moment and everything else had disappeared in my mind the second I glanced at the jewelry around her neck. A purple pendant shimmered in the light over her pale skin. "It can't be. . ." I whispered to myself, grabbing the pendant and flipping it over carefully to find the initials M.W. carved behind it.

My world shattered in seconds and everything I knew no longer made sense anymore. . .

"Jinx!" Someone shouted before I was shoved off of the girl by a strong force. I shook my thoughts out and watched the large teen known as Mammoth pick jinx from off the ground and carry her off with her one eyed friend see-more.

"Hope to not _see_ you again!" The boy threatened before they disappeared out of the building with the rest of their teammates.

"KF!" Robin rushed to my side and helped me back on my feet, "What's wrong with you? You let them get away!" He lectured, as I tried holding myself up by leaning against the walls.

"You okay, dude?" Beast boy nudged.

"Kid flash?" Robin waved a hand in front of me.

"I-I'll do better next time. . ." I nodded and stepped out of the building. The night hadn't changed, most of the criminals had been handled carefully, and the world still looked like it normally did. Yet, the universe felt as if it were no more. Everything had changed and still it was all the same. My mind refused to accept the facts that were clearly there, out of fear of realizing the truth. The girl I once loved, the one I had betrayed, couldn't be the same girl I'd spent months trying to capture.

"Rose. . ." After all the years of calling out to you, you never appeared. The years spent in search led to dead ends and failures. You were suppose to be nothing more but a painful memory of the past, and yet is it possible. . .?

 **That you had been in front of me all along?**


	10. Chapter 9: Never Back Down

Chapter 9: Never Back Down

Jinx

 _There was a creaking coming from the bottom of the stairs, beyond our door, that made my heart flee in fear of facing it alone. The other children slept somewhat peacefully in their old beds as I stared up at the cobwebs in the corner of the ceiling, breathing in the stuffy scent of exhaustion and mothballs all around the room. There was no light, and no other sound but that of our own breathing in the attic. Locked away with nothing more but our own thoughts to keep us company in the never ending darkness that was our life. . ._

 _"You're going to get in trouble if they catch you awake." Someone muttered at the end of the room. A boy with dark skin and emerald eyes watching me in bed from where he slept._

 _"So will you?" I whispered back, turning my body toward him._

 _"It's different, though. Miss Amber likes to punish the girls more than she does the guys. If I'm caught I'll probably have to take a beating or be given extra chores. If you're caught you'll go straight to the dark room. . ." He nodded at the exit._

 _"The dark room? What's that?" I asked, pushing myself up to get a better view of him in the darkness._

 _"You don't wanna find out." She shook his head and turned to the other side of his bed._

 _"What's your name?" I asked._

 _"Why are you still talking?" He muttered._

 _"Sorry. . ." I whispered and fell back on my bed._

 _"It's Seymour. . ." He answered, keeping his back facing me._

 _"I'm Rose." I smiled, "How old are you, Seymour?" I asked, watching him slowly turn to face me once again._

 _"You really are annoying." He groaned, "I turned six last month."_

 _"So, did I." I replied, sounding far too excited._

 _"Where did you get transferred from?" He asked me._

 _"What do you mean?" I asked, confused by his question._

 _"Like what home did you live in before here? Why did you get placed with us?"_

 _"Hm? I lived with my mommy before I came here but. . ." I paused, fighting back the tears, "She couldn't take care of me no more. So, the grown ups told me I had to come here until my mommy could come back for-"_

 _"She's never coming back." He said, his words piercing my heart like a knife that sent a painful sensation shooting across my entire body._

 _"Yes she will!" I cried, "Because my sister promised she would. . ."_

 _"You don't think we've had the same promises made to us?" He glared, sitting up in his bed and pointing at the dozens of children in the room, "All of us were told the exact same thing. We've been lied to just like you have, but fact is - nobody's coming back for us. We've all been forgotten and left behind for no reason. No one's coming to save you."_

 _"You're wrong! Linda swore we'd all be together again. She promised me-"_

 _"She lied!" He cut in, "Nobody wants you and that's why you're here." He finished._

 _"You're wrong. . ." I cried, hiding my face in my pillow and allowing the tears to slip down my face. I could feel him watching me, glaring at me, and mocking me due to my naïve mind. I refused to accept the truth, to open my eyes to the reality of my situation, because deep down I already knew. Despite the hope I carried, I was aware of the facts that I would have to face the rest of the world alone and on my own._

 _I just didn't want to accept it._

 _"What's going on up there?" The voice of our caretaker echoed from down below, marching up the staircase before she slammed the door open which woke the rest of the children in the room. Anger flashed in her eyes as she came stomping into our room in her slippers, dressed in her pink robe and night gown with curlers placed in her fiery red hair._

 _"Shit." Seymour whispered, and sat himself up in his bed along with the others._

 _"Who's making all that noise, huh?" Miss Amber asked, annoyed, flashing her flashlight at every child in bed._

 _"What's taking so long?" A man's voice was heard from down below._

 _"I'm dealing with the brats right now!" She screamed to him before returning to us._

 _"You're wasting my time!" He yelled, rushing up the steps before entering. He was a tall, scrawny, man with dark eyes and a light layer of stubble around his face, dressed in a white T shirt and jeans with a pair of old worn out boots. He eyed the girls in the first few beds up front strangely, grinning and giving off an uncomfortable feeling._

 _"Then go find some place else to satisfy your needs." Miss amber scoffed, flashing her light at me and the other kids behind._

 _"Is that a new one?" The man nodded at me, "She's pretty cute." He grinned._

 _"Hey kid!" The woman called to me, "What's your name again?"_

 _"R-Rose. . ." I whispered, glancing over at Seymour for a second who'd looked at me in concern._

 _"You want her?" Miss Amber looked to the man._

 _"Has she been broken in yet?" He asked, eyeing me strangely from head to toe._

 _"No, she's fresh off the streets." The woman said, placing her hand out in front of him._

 _"Even better." He chuckled, reaching in his pocket and placing a roll of cash in her hand._

 _"Alright, kid-" She put the money in the pocket of her robe, "Come here." She waved at me._

 _"W-why?" I asked, scooting to the end of my bed._

 _"Don't worry, Rosie." The man smiled and approached me slowly, "We're just going to play a little game, that's all." He whispered, kneeling down and placing a hand over my leg._

 _"I-I don't wanna play anything. . ." I shook my head, ready to move away until he gripped my wrist tightly and yanked me off the bed._

 _"Be a good little girl." He said sternly, pulling me toward the exit._

 _"I don't wanna go!" I screamed, pulling against his grip as he dragged me to the door._

 _"Alright- " Miss amber yelled, grabbing me by my hair, "That's enough!" She said and helped the man in pulling me out of the room._

 _"Stop it!" I cried, unable to fight against their strength._ _My eyes could only catch a quick glance at Seymour who turned his head away from me as tears began to fall down my face again. There was no way out, no escape, no stopping this and I realized that the moment I left the attic and faced the room at the end of the staircase. The room Seymour had warned me about moments ago. . ._

 _Dread formed in the pit of my stomach at the thoughts of what would occur next. Every muscle in my body tensed up, fighting, struggling, and resisting against the two who forced me down the steps and ignored my cries and screams. The woman with fiery red hair held no expression nor guilt, and the man next to her only laughed at my resistance in participating in his little 'game'. And once we reached the final step she left me in his care and allowed him to throw me into the room before she started counting her paper bills._

 _The door was locked shut and I was trapped in a dark room with the beast who continued to laugh at my cries. The shades by the windows were drawn shut and every bit of light was gone as he slammed me down on to the cold wooden ground and laughed at the hours of pain and tears soon to come for me to endure before proceeding in tainting my innocence. . ._

 _"Be good." He whispered one final time, before the darkness consumed by body and ate away at what little hope I once carried entering this home. . ._

"Jinx!" A voice called to me, shaking me awake in my bed as I shot up screaming in tears.

"Don't touch me!" I yelled, fighting against the hands of the person hiding in the dark.

"It's me!" He said, flicking my lantern back on, "It's just me."

"Seymour?" I whispered, allowing my eyes to adjust to the light before gazing back at the one eyed boy sitting on my bed.

"Yeah." He nodded, rubbing my arm to comfort me. I felt a sense of relief and sadness wash over me before I fell into his arms and hid myself in his chest.

"I'm sorry. . ." I cried as he held me tightly in his embrace.

"It's okay, it's okay. . ." He whispered, "Was it another nightmare again?" He asked, gently stroking my hair.

"They've been more frequent lately. They just won't go away!" I screamed, pushing myself out of his arms and wiping the tears off my face.

"The memories?" He asked and I nodded in response.

"Do you remember the woman who used to take care of us when we were living in that attic together?"

"Take care of us? Not the words I would use, but yeah, " He nodded, "I remember her."

"Do you remember what she would do with all the girls in the house?" I looked at him and saw the guilt flash in his eyes before he looked away.

"Yeah. . ." He said in a whisper.

"You know, I hate a lot of people in this world, but the one person I can't _stand_ the most is that woman. . ." My voice trembled at the memories of her and the mixed emotions of pain and hatred I held towards that witch.

"I know, but if we acted on all this anger towards her we'd risk exposing our identities. We can't allow anyone to link us back to her or-"

"Don't you think I know that!" I yelled, accidentally shattering the flower vase on my dresser with another hex, "I just. . . I _hate_ her!" I hid my face in my knees and could no longer stop the tears from escaping.

"I'm sorry. . ." He whispered, sadness found in his tone, "It's my fault. . ." He said, forcing me to look back at him only to find him staring down in guilt with his body trembling where he sat.

"Seymour. . ."

"If I had done something back then. If I had at least tried to stop her -stop them- then maybe you wouldn't have had to- "

"Stop it." I placed a hand on his shoulder, "This wasn't your fault."

"But if I had just-"

"You would have failed." I told him, "There was nothing you could have done. You couldn't have fought against her or every man she allowed into that house. It wouldn't have changed anything because we were small and weak. The fact is that we were at a disadvantage from the very beginning. That's just what happens to kids who are left behind to fend for themselves in this world."

"Jinx. . ." He looked up at me.

"Now lets drop the depressing attitude," I smacked his head, "It doesn't suit either of us."

"Ow." He rubbed the side of his head and lightly pushed me.

"What's done is done. Let's not dread over the past anymore." I smiled at him before getting out of bed and stared down at the broken glass scattered on the floor.

"You know, our childhood might have sucked big time, but I'm grateful for everything that happened." He smiled up at me.

"Oh?" I turned my head to him.

"Think about it. If we hadn't lost our families and gone through all that adversity, then we wouldn't have created such a strong bond with everyone here and created a home for _ourselves_." He said, taking my hand and pulling me back on to the bed.

"That's true." I nodded.

"And I wouldn't trade any of you guys for anything. Not even for all the money or jewels in this world."

"Liar." I laughed and playfully pushed him.

"I'm serious!" He laughed, taking hand and interlocking them together. My eyes stared down at his fingers for a moment before meeting his gaze as we sat there in silence. The smiles faded and everything had suddenly become serious. I could sense him leaning in closer, and I could feel his breath on me as I remained still and quiet. He placed a hand on the side of my face carefully before he moved in and gently pressed his lips against mine. The kiss held no spark yet I felt no uneasiness watching him with open eyes as he closed his shut. No matter how hard I tried to mimic him and deepen the kiss it couldn't change anything. . .

Because I felt nothing.

"I would never hurt you like they did. . ." He pulled away and placed his forehead against mine.

"I know." I nodded and laid my head on his shoulder, "That's why I trust you."

"Then promise me something?" He looked at me and held his pinky out.

"What are you five?"

"Just promise me that no matter what happens we'll all do whatever it takes to keep this family together. . ." He paused, "because I don't want to ever be separated from any of you guys." He finished.

"Stupid," I locked my pinky with his, "Of course we'll all do whatever it takes to stay together. I won't let anything or anyone destroy what we've created here." I said before falling down on my bed.

"Good." He smiled before falling beside me, "So what are we going to do about the Brotherhood of Evil now?"

"I don't know. I mean with Madame Rogue being locked up and blaming me for what happened it feels like joining now would be nearly impossible at this point. . ."

"So you're just going to give up?" He gasped sarcastically, "I don't believe my ears." He joked.

"Idiot," I punched his arm, "That's not what I said. I just need some time to think of a way to fix this."

"Okay, first-ow!" He rubbed his arm, "And second, you know that none of us would blame you if you wanted to throw in the towel and call it quits. We're all fine with how things are right now. You're the only one who feels we need to level up."

"I just want to get us the respect we deserve. I mean, you saw how everyone praised and cheered for her back at the meeting. They all feared her and listened to anything she had to say. That's what I want for us. I want us to be taken seriously by everyone - including those stupid titans." I said, staring at the ceiling and fantasizing about the future that awaited for us if everything went according to plan.

"What are you going to do about that kid flash dude then? I mean, it feels like he's the main thing standing in the way of reaching that goal lately." He looked me, sitting back up on the bed.

"I don't know yet. . ." I whispered and grabbed the pendant around my neck.

 _"You don't belong there jinx!"_

"But I'm not going to let him ruin anything more for me. . ." I sat up on my bed.

"He was acting weirder than usual during that fight though." Seymour said, gazing at the pendant for a moment, "Why do you still where that thing?"

I shrugged, "It's my favorite color."

"Yeah, but it holds way too many memories don't you think? I mean, Terra used to wear that everyday before she-"

"Which is why I keep it. That way I have a piece of her with me wherever I go." I told him before bouncing off my bed.

"Yeah but wearing it as a necklace for school and then as a choker when you're battling as jinx might risk revealing your identity, don't you think?"

"You worry too much."

"No, you just don't worry enough." He said before pushing himself off the bed.

"Whatever." I shrugged and looked back at the broken pieces of glass from the shattered vase on my carpet.

"It's your funeral." He patted my shoulders and waved before leaving my bedroom. The door slid shut and the room fell empty and quiet once again. I stared at my door for second then back at the glass and roses scattered all over my bedroom floor. I bent down and carefully picked up the red roses from off the ground, staring at them and letting my thoughts wander for a moment.

 _"You don't belong there jinx!"_

Those words bounced around in my head continuously and no matter what I did I couldn't make them go away or shake the strange feeling I felt the moment he said them. He was constantly trying to create a small shred of hope whenever we fought against one another, bringing me to doubt not only myself but everything that I am and have become. He made it so that nothing made sense anymore and difficult to tell the difference between right and wrong.

"Idiot." I whispered, tearing the roses apart before shoving them into the trashcan by my door, "I won't let you ruin this for me next time." I vowed before throwing myself back on the bed and waiting for sleep to take. My mind was set, the promise was made, and the decision was final. No matter who or what it was, I wouldn't let them intervene again. No matter the cost, or risk, we would succeed.

 **Because _nothing_ was going to stand in our way.**


	11. Chapter 10: Too Much To Handle

Chapter 10: Too Much To Handle

Kid Flash

The midnight breeze blew through my window and bounced off the walls as I tried resting on my bed with my hand placed over my bruised ribs, while listening to the sound of my breath and the fumbling of my aunts feet down the hall. The pain was more than bearable and it wasn't difficult to ignore, I hadn't even noticed the injury when that over-sized idiot shoved me off of jinx during the battle. My mind was too busy to function or focus on anything other than the discovery I had made when I got a better look at her pendant. . .

"You sure you don't need my help with your injury?" My aunt's voice came through the door before she peeked her head in. The exhaustion could be seen in her eyes with the heavy bags painted underneath them due to working late hours, even her skin had grown a new shade of pale, and her auburn hair fell past her shoulders in a mess.

"I'm fine, I don't even feel it." I shrugged, sitting up in bed and grabbing a T-shirt on the ground before slipping it on.

"Well, I'm going to make some tea if you want any?" She offered, pushing the door open a bit wider.

"No thanks, Aunt I." I shook my head and reached for the phone in my pocket.

"Okay. . . I have work in the morning so I won't be able to make breakfast tomorrow."

"That's fine." I nodded at her, turning my phone back on and waiting for the home screen to light up.

"Wally. . ." She stepped inside, "I think we should talk about this whole hero business." She said, shutting the door behind and walking to sit beside me in her blue sweats.

"What do you mean?"

"I think it's best you consider dropping the whole thing- or at least taking a break from all of it. . ."

"Not this again." I groaned, falling back on my bed and shoving a pillow over my face.

"This isn't fun and games. You're putting yourself at a serious risk of injuring yourself or worse-"

"I'm always safe." I told her through the pillow.

"That's not what I mean." She yanked the pillow off my face, "I know that you're careful but that's not always enough. You're risking everything when you go out there and it could one day cost you your own life!" She lectured, tossing the pillow on the floor as I sat back up to finish the conversation.

"I'm not scared of dying." I shrugged, "Whether I make it out dead or alive, there's always going to be someone waiting for me on the other side." I said casually, but instantly regretted my words the moment I spotted the tinge of sadness in her eyes, and I immediately knew I had only made the situation far worse.

"Even if that's true, I'm not ready to lose you yet. . ." She breathed in shakily, "You're parents death was painful enough. I refuse to allow you to abandon me and reunite with them first." She whispered and quickly wiped away the tear forming in the corner of her eye.

"I'm sorry. . ." I pulled her in my arms and held her tightly, rubbing her back to comfort her, "I didn't mean it, okay? I wouldn't leave you and uncle B behind." I told her before she pulled away from my embrace.

"I just worry about you sometimes. . ."

"Don't. Nothing's going to happen to me, okay?" I reassured her.

"I know you know how to take care of yourself. I guess it just feels like sometimes you like to put hero work first before your social life, and I don't want your future to revolve around saving peoples lives by sacrificing your own."

"Pft, please. I may be great at my job but I don't plan on turning into some workaholic where I spend every second of my life saving people from burning buildings and what not." I laughed, making her smile and helping ease her worries.

"Alright, just remember this conversation." She said, ruffling my hair before getting off my bed. She headed toward my door and I waved for her to leave before my eyes suddenly fell on the family photo I had placed on my dresser.

"Hey, Aunt I?" I called to her and she immediately stopped to look back at me.

"Yeah?"

"I have a question about my. . . parents." Her body tensed up at the idea of talking about them.

"Ask away." She tried to say calmly.

"It's just about something my mom used to wear - a necklace she always had on with this- "

"Purple pendant?" She finished my sentence, "That's what you're curious about?"

"Yeah, I was just wondering where she got it?"

"She didn't. You're dad gave it to her as a gift." She said, sitting back down on my bed.

"Where did he buy it?"

"He had it custom made at an old shop that closed down probably years before you were even born." She explained, looking at me suspiciously.

"So, then there's only one of it's kind? You can't buy it anywhere else?" I asked and she shook her head.

"No, because they wouldn't sell it anywhere else. It was made specifically for Mary. You're dad wasn't the greatest guy in the world, but it was something your mom loved dearly. He even had her initials, Mary West, engraved on the back." She said and my mind instantly fell back to the initials found on the pendant Jinx wore around her neck.

"It doesn't make sense though. . ."

"What doesn't?" She nudged my arm.

"N-nothing, nevermind." I laughed nervously, scooting her off my bed, "You can go now."

"Why are you being so weird- "

"Alright, you two, off to bed." My uncle entered the room, grabbing my aunt by her arm gently, "You've got work early in the morning." He reminded her.

"You're boring." She frowned and pulled her arm from out of his grip before stomping out of the room.

"And you have school tomorrow." He pointed his finger at me and headed for the door.

"Wait, Uncle B!" I called to the blonde haired man dressed in shorts and a plain white shirt.

"Yeah?"

"I need to ask you for something." I looked at him.

"Can't it wait till tomorrow?" He yawned.

"I don't think so, it's about a certain group of criminals."

"Alright, Alright." He groaned, closing the door behind him.

"I was wondering if you could get some info on a certain member of a group that goes by the name Hive Five?"

"High Five?" He stared down at me with sleepy eyes.

"No, _Hive_ five." I repeated.

"Depends. Who's the member?" He asked and slowly sat beside me.

"Her name's Jinx. She's the leader of a group running rampant in Jump City."

" _Jump City?_ Isn't that titans territory? Why can't you just ask Robin for help? Batman's former protégé would probably me more useful in situations like these, seeing that he and bat's are the ones who specialize in detective work, don't you think?"

"I can't. He'd flip if I brought her up in a conversation again." I explained, turning to the tired hero nearly falling asleep on my bed.

"What's special about her?" He muttered, slowly laying himself down on my bed.

"I just need to find out a few things." I said, kicking his leg to keep his eyes from shutting.

"Alright, Alright. I'll do what I can kiddo." He nodded before getting back up on his feet, "Is that all?" He asked while heading for the door.

"Yeah for now." I nodded and watched him wave goodbye before leaving the room and shutting the door behind him. I fell back on my bed and sighed, thinking to myself of ways that linked jinx and the girl in the attic together.

 _"She's a thief. She could have just stolen that necklace somehow. . ."_ I thought to myself, tossing and turning on my bed as the ideas in my head prevented me from sleeping. But the fact was that the bubblegum haired witch and the girl in the attic I had lost during my adolescent years were somehow connected, and that was what bothered me, because by placing the two together only doubled my guilt in failing to save either of them.

"Damn it." I sighed and reached for my phone to ignore my thoughts for a moment. I clicked it on and was about to put in my password the moment the screen lit up, when I noticed an unknown number had called me twice and left a voicemail behind. After putting in the password I quickly tapped the screen and brought the phone to my ear to listen.

 _You have one unheard message._

 ** _Beep._**

 _"Hey Wally, it's me Linda- Linda Park and. . .I don't why I just said my last name too, that's weird. But I got your number from one of the guys on your team. I hope you don't mind. I wasn't trying to stalk you or anything. . . but anyways, I just called because I thought we had plans to meet up at the party? I don't know if you're here or not, and we never really promised to hang out or anything, but I've been searching for you for a few hours now and I don't see you. Just call me if you get here, or if you're already here. And, yeah. . . bye."_

 _End of Message._

"Shit." I groaned, tossing the phone on my bed. After the battle against jinx my mind wasn't able to function on anything other than the discovery I had made, and now I'd have to explain to Linda, and the other's about why I was no-show. The whole thing irritated me and I cursed at the wind until I noticed the Biology book by my schoolbag in the corner of the room.

"I forgot about the Adam's girl too." I mumbled, grabbing the pillow from off the floor and shoving it over my face. The lies were beginning to eat away at me little by little the further I sunk into this hole, and I didn't know when I'd be able to shake off this uneasy feeling. No matter what I did I couldn't stop from drowning under everything that came at me. The whole thing was suffocating and honestly. . .

 **It was all beginning to feel like too much.**


	12. Chapter 11: Risk It And Lose It All

Chapter 11: Risk It And Lose It All

Jinx

The hallways were crowded with preoccupied students rushing and stopping in the middle to chat with their friends. The stuffy air, the lockers lined up on the walls, the buzzing voices, and the heavy steps irritated me greatly. My energy had been lost completely due to the lack of sleep caused by the frequent night terrors that made it impossible to dream anymore. The trauma and regrets from the past were catching up to me, drowning me in guilt and despair, and there didn't seem to be a solution to ending the problem.

"Out of the way, freak." A stranger laughed, shoving me against a locker as the rest of the crowd stopped to point and stare.

The fact's were there, and the truth of the matter was that without my powers I was _nobody_. None of these non-metahumans feared me because of how easily I blended in with their kind. It almost felt natural playing the role of the outcast - and that's what bothered me. It wasn't the pushing or the shoving, or even the name-calling. It was the fact that I knew this was what I would have been destined to become if I had grown up like the rest of them. There was no blissful life to choose from. My options were either to live as Rose adam's, the freak on campus, or Jinx, the criminal. . . that was it.

I made my way to the girls bathroom, ignoring the whispering and stares I'd received while entering. There were only two females standing by the sink, fixing their make up and ignoring my presence as I rushed into one of the stalls to escape the rest of the school for a moment. The classes, the bullies, the workload, and dealing with the team at home had me questioning whether or not I could handle it all together anymore. It was all just starting to become a little overwhelming.

"Did you tune into the news this morning?" One of the girls asked the other by the sink.

"Duh. How could I miss watching Wally's Aunt reporting in on everything."

"You think watching his Aunt's going to somehow get you closer to him?" The girl scoffed.

"I don't see you trying anything else to win him over. Besides, it's all I _can_ do without upsetting blondie."

"Stacy does get pretty scary whenever someone tries approaching him."

"Exactly!"

"But I was talking about the titan's news."

"Oh, yeah. Didn't they bring in a whole bunch of crazy lunatics joining some kinda cult or something?" The girl laughed.

"Yeah. They were part of some brotherhood trying to take over the world or something stupid like that. They even managed to take down their leader who ended up being some weird looking Russian looney."

"That's the titan's for ya. Even our very own Kid Flash managed to join in to help."

"He's so hot! If I can't have Wally I wouldn't mind settling for Kid flash!" One of them squealed and was most likely drooling over the image of him in her head.

"Like that'll ever happen. They're both out of our leagues."

"Let a girl dream. . ."

The rest of their conversation faded away along with my thoughts. The world knew about the titan's victorious attack on us that brought along our failures. All the villain captured that night were probably sitting behind bars, _blaming_ us for what had happened. . . and maybe they were right? Could it really have been my fault? Did I really lead them to us like Madame Rogue said? The fact that kid flash was there made the accusation plausible. Still, if it were true then what more could I have done? And what should I do now that I've fallen deeper into this mess? There were so many questions rushing through my head, but they vanished the moment my communicator started buzzing in my bag.

"What?" I answered in a whisper, bringing the device closer to my face.

"Jinx, I found out how those crud-munchin' Titan's were able to find our location during that meeting!" Gizmo yelled through the other end, making me jump and check underneath the stall to see if anyone else had heard.

"Idiot, speak quieter!" I ordered, "Now, what are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about how that butt sniffing Cyborg was the one who hacked into our system and managed to track our location before we even arrived. They'd been waiting for us the whole time!" He explained, his words bouncing in my head.

"So. . .it really was my fault. . ."

"What? N-no! That's not what I meant. I should have been more careful and-"

"It doesn't matter. I have to head back to class."

"But jinx-"

"I'll see you at home." I said and hung up immediately. The truth had been revealed and the answer to my question since that night had finally appeared. Now I needed to focus solely on digging my way out of this hole and proving to the brotherhood of evil that we were worthy enough to stand by their side. Once I found a way to do that then nothing could stand in our way, especially not that idiot kid flash. . .

"Hey Rosie~" A voice sang from above, and I looked up to find a girl peeking her head over the stall with a bucket in her hand.

"What are you- "

"Surprise." She laughed, pouring icy cold water over me from the silver bucket above. My entire body froze for a moment as the cold liquid gripped my skin, making it difficult to even let out a scream.

All my thoughts were mashed into a jumble and all I could do was grab my bag and rush out of my stall, completely soaked from head to toe. The moment I stepped out I was greeted by a group of girls who appeared to be waiting for me in the bathroom, laughing at my appearance and snapping photos on their camera. Their actions, this school, and all of it was starting to get at me - constantly pocking at me in hopes of seeing me crack, but I refused to let them win or shed a single tear in front of them. This was the fate I'd been destined to face long ago and it almost made me appreciate the path I walked on as jinx.

"I have to say I think that look suits you a lot better." A voice spoke from behind and the group immediately stepped to the side to reveal the blonde haired bimbo in the background.

"What do you want?" I asked, restraining myself and the anger rising inside me.

"I think it's pretty obvious." She laughed, "I've been told by various sources that you've been seen messing with my Wally." She explained, moving to the front of her group.

" _Your_ Wally? You mean West-?"

"Aha! So you admit you _have_ been stalking him!" She pointed her finger at me.

"What?" I squinted, pushing her hand down.

"Don't deny it!" She howled.

"Okay?" I shrugged, drying myself off a bit as the rest of her gang glared at me.

"Just stay away from him - he's mine, got that?"

"Does he know that?" I asked, gazing at them calmly.

"Of course he does!" She sputtered.

"Well, I think you should remind him just in case. . ."

"You little-" She raised her hand high up in the air and everyone immediately stopped to watch her. I squeezed my eyes shut instantly, aware of what would occur next, and reminded myself to keep my anger under control or risk exposing myself. I was soon met with a stinging pain the second her hand met my cheek. She slapped me hard enough to knock me off my feet and onto the ground as the rest of her crew began to laugh again, recording the event on their cellphones.

"This is so going viral!" One of them said, getting closer to get a better look at my face.

"Guess you know better then to try and mess with me next time, huh?" The blonde smiled triumphantly, high fiving the others behind her.

"Please. . ." I said, gazing up at each of them, "My little brother hits harder than that." I grinned and tried picking myself up from off the slippery wet floor.

"Oh really?" She smirked, stepping a few feet closer and pushing me back to the ground.

"This bitch won't learn. Just mess her up, Stace!" One of the girls yelled, holding the camera up from the back.

"You're right." The blonde nodded and swung her foot back before kicking me across the face.

There was a ringing in my ear and drops of blood spilling from my nose and mixing with the water on the ground. My body trembled where it laid, fighting not only the pain but the urge to attack. I restrained myself and the desire to send these girls flying, but the louder they laughed and the more time they spent recording me made it difficult. There was a limit to everything in life and this was mine. There would only be seconds left before I'd lose it and completely snap. . .

"What are you guys doing?" A voice echoed from the door way.

"Mind your own business, noob." The blonde scoffed.

"Rose!" The stranger called out to me, rushing to my aid and placing their arms over my body. I slowly looked up at the blurred image of the girl beside me until she came into a focus. I recognized the raven haired female the day I met up with West, but I assumed she was just one of his many fans.

"If you don't leave now, I'll call in a teacher and report you _all_ for harassment against a student on campus." The girl threatened, staring at the group surrounding the two of us now.

"Stacy, don't let her scare-" One of the girls spoke out but was silenced by the blonde's glare in her direction.

"Whatever," The blonde smiled, "I think I've made my point clear." She looked at me before nodding at the others and leaving the room together.

"You okay?" The raven haired girl asked, handing me her hand.

"I'm fine." I said, waving her hand away and pushing myself off the ground steadily. Once I was up I grabbed a paper napkin by the sink and soaked it in water to clean up the blood running down my nose, when I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the mirror. It revealed a girl with a bright red cheek and bruised eye to match staring back at me and a beautiful brown eyed, raven haired female with porcelain-like skin standing in the background.

"What was going on?" She asked, picking my bag up from off the floor and handing it to me.

"Nothing." I told her, taking my bag and heading out the door.

"Wait!" She called out.

"What?" I glanced back to find her following behind me.

"Y-You're Rose Adams, right?" She asked, and I stopped to look at her.

"Why do you ask?" I eyed her suspiciously.

"Oh, um, my name's Linda-Linda Park." She laughed nervously, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Ok? That doesn't answer my question." I shrugged and continued walking.

"You don't remember me?" She grabbed my hand and pulled me back.

"Should I?" I asked, taking my hand back.

"Yeah, back when we were little-" She was interrupted by the ringing of the bell and the bodies of students heading to class. I stepped away from her slowly, suspicious by her words that automatically sent me back to the attic I spent most of my childhood in.

"I'm sorry, but I should go." I told her and headed for class.

"Rose wait!" She called out to me which only quickened my pace.

The stares, glares, pointing, and laughter faded away in that moment. The pain in my eye didn't even seem to matter anymore. The thought that there was someone out there linked to my past that I hadn't been aware of, someone who could risk exposing me to the rest of the school, was all I could think about. Everything would crumble before my very eyes if our secret got out. It wouldn't simply ruin my civilian life, but also the lives the rest of the Hive had created. All of it would be taken away and we'd be right back to where we started, and if that happened. . .

 **There'd be no escape.**


	13. Chapter 12: False Facade

Chapter 12: False Façade. . .

Kid Flash

Dust scattered across the halls with the pattering noise of sneakers hurrying out of sixth period. I blended with the crowd, avoiding those I knew, and headed down the direction of the library. Not only could I not come up with an excuse to my absence at the party the night before, but I also didn't want to be caught sneaking into the library to meet up with a certain four eyed weirdo. The lies, the excuses, the secrets, were all piling up and suffocating me the deeper I sunk and it felt like the longer I kept it going the harder it would be to get out of these situations.

"Wally!" Linda's voice came through the passing crowd, and it didn't take long to spot the raven haired beauty heading towards me.

"Linda!" I waved, playing it cool in hopes of not needing to explain anything to her.

"Where are you headed?" She asked, standing and blocking the only path to the library.

"Nowhere special," I shrugged, "Just need to, um, meet with a teacher. . ." I lied, scratching my head nervously.

"Oh, well what happened to the party? Did you get my message. . .?" She asked shyly, staring down at her feet while waiting for an explanation.

"Yeah, sorry, I couldn't make it. I, uh, got sick - it was really bad! I couldn't even get out of bed." I lied again, staring at the clock ticking away on the wall.

"Are you okay?" She looked at me in concern and placed her hand on my arm. The moment we touched again that strange feeling sparked like before, but I couldn't figure out it's true meaning.

Who exactly was this girl?

"Yeah, yeah. I just needed some rest that's all."

"It's fine. Maybe we can hang out some other time?" She smiled.

"Yeah, sure." I nodded, ready to race right past her and head to my destination on time or risk receiving another lecture from the four eyed freak waiting for me.

"Great! How about some time this weekend?" She suggested, her eyes lighting up like a Christmas tree all full of hope.

"I think I can make that happen." I said, staring down at the girl smiling happily like a child at accepting her invitation.

"Okay, well you have my number so we can just- "

"Hey freak!" Some guy called out to a small figure standing by the lockers in the hall and I immediately recognized the jock marching over to the four eyed girl I had planned to meet in the library moments ago.

"Isn't that your friend, Gary?" Linda asked, staring at the idiot bullying the petite girl who locked eyes with me for a quick second before returning to the guy harassing her.

"Yeah." I groaned, shaking my head after watching him toss the girl's books to the floor and yelling at her as if she were less than the rest of us. I planned to ignore it, turn away and meet up with her where we had originally planned to meet, not wanting to be linked to the girl more than I already had. That was my plan. . . until I watched her body get slammed and pushed against her locker by one of my own teammates.

"Damn it." I sighed.

"He can't do that to her!" Linda cried out, ready to head to straight over before I grabbed her wrist and pulled her away from the argument occurring in the opposite direction.

"I'll take care of it." I told her.

"But he can't- "

"Just go home." I cut her off, "I'll fix this and talk to you later." I told her and took a deep breath before I made my way to the two arguing.

"I'm not going to say it again, freak!" Gary snarled, ramming the girl against the lockers again while the rest of the students walked by as if it were a regular thing. "Hand me your algebra homework now!"

"I thought you said you weren't going to say it again?" She grinned, poking at the ferocious lion ready to attack at any given moment.

"That's it! I'm going to-"

"Woah, gary-" I cut in, placing an arm over his shoulders, "What's with all the fighting?" I smiled, trying to reduce the tension rising between them.

"This little brat won't hand over the work for tomorrows math homework." He complained, keeping the girl pinned against the lockers as he spoke.

"I see. . ." I nodded, "Well then why didn't you just ask me?" I patted his back, pulling him off of the small framed girl who refused to show any sign of fear.

"You?" He raised his brow in confusion.

"The girl's crazy for me, remember? I can get those homework pages - no problem. You don't need to make a scene in the halls." I explained and smiled as he began to laugh.

"Oh, right!" He nodded, "I didn't think of that. So, you can get me the answers?" He asked with hopeful eyes.

"Sure. . ." I paused, "Just don't pull this stuff again, okay? You know how I feel about violence." I warned him.

"Right. . ." He laughed nervously and followed the crowd to leave campus.

"Well that's all taken care of." I muttered to myself and let out a sigh of relief before turning back to the girl picking up her books from off the floor.

"I didn't need your help." She said monotonously.

"Right? Because you had everything under control?" I scoffed at the girl getting back up after grabbing all of her belongings.

"Yup." She nodded, keeping her head down and turning toward the direction of the library.

"You know, most people say thank you at a time like this?" I rolled my eyes and followed.

"Well it's good that I'm not like most people." She mumbled, increasing her pace.

"Ungrateful freak."

"Annoying pest."

"Hey!" I shouted, grabbing her arm and forcefully pulling her back, "What the hell's wrong with-" The words were lost in my mouth the moment she turned to face me head up. The dark bruise surrounding her right eye was something she had been clearly trying to hide. She didn't show any indication of pain but she seemed to be worn out and tired.

"Who did this to you?" I asked angrily, thinking back to Gary and wondering when he had gotten the chance to harm her this badly without me seeing.

"No one." She lied, ready to leave but was stopped by my yanking of her arm.

"Bullshit."

"Why do you care?" She said, yanking her arm back and sending me a hateful glare.

"Because if it was any of my guys who were responsible for something like _this_ , I'd need to step in."

"You don't _need_ to do anything. I'm not some fragile child who needs protection - especially from you." She said, rolling her eyes.

"I seriously doubt that, but that's not the point-"

"Then what is?"

"The point is that I'm not cool with my guys, or _any_ guy, going around beating up just anyone, especially a female!"

"Really?" She laughed, "Says the guy who enjoys tormenting any being weaker than him."

"Look, I get why you might hate me and all but I wouldn't do anything to physically harm any human being, including you." I said, as she looked up at me surprised for a quick second before morphing back into her emotionless self.

"That may be true, but you can cause a lot of damage to someone in other ways." She lectured, glaring at me with those hateful eyes again.

"There's just no winning with you is there? Can't you see I'm genuinely concerned for you right now?" I said, trying to understand what this girl's problem was with me.

"Yeah, well, I don't need your concern. What I need is to pass Biology and I can't do that with you wasting my time by prying into my personal life."

"I was just-"

"Drop it." She finished the conversation and continued down the hall to the library. There was so much hate in her tone and in her eyes during the entire conversation, but strangely, it didn't feel like it was directed to me alone. Her entire existence confused and intrigued me in a strange way, but it also worried me. The way she carried herself, and her reaction to certain situations weren't that of an average teenage girl. She seemed to keep _everything_ to herself, that it was difficult to fully understand her on any level. There was something else though, something darker. I could feel it every time she spoke to me, looked at me, but I couldn't figure out what _it_ was. She was hiding something, a secret of some kind. . .

 **And I think that was what intrigued me the most.**


	14. Chapter 13: Nostalgia

Chapter 13: Nostalgia

Jinx

The clouds I viewed through the library window hovered heavily in the sky, blocking daylight and bringing night to fall quicker than usual. I hid behind empty pages with dozens of thoughts clouding my mind like the sky outside. A simple task like studying had already grown stressful due to the pain in my right eye, and I'd lost all confidence in passing this class while having to deal with the daily harassment on campus. Everything in me was screaming to give up, call it quits, and go home. It would have been easy to just drop out and pretend like this experience had never happened. Nothing could stop me, not even the law, but I couldn't just walk out. This was a promise I was set on keeping. . . for her sake.

 _"Ever wonder what it'd be like to live out in the real world?" The blue eyed blonde stared out at the horizon through the barred window in our room._

 _"Soon we won't have to wonder." I told her, resting on the white bed and gazing up at the ceiling._

 _"What if it doesn't work? What if we get caught? What if we can't ever leave? What if-"_

 _"What if the world blew up in flames and you turned into a yellow unicorn?" I joked, watching her glare at me from across the room._

 _"I'm serious, rose. If we get caught they'll never forgive us. We'll be killed. . ." She spoke in fear, staring back at the window that showed nothing but a blue sky and a never ending field through the gates that held us in like prisoners._

 _"We're already dead." I jumped out of my bed and walked over to her side._

 _"Don't say stuff like-"_

 _"What do you want me to say, Terra? That everything's going to be okay? That if we break out of this place we'll be guaranteed happiness for the rest of our lives? Is that what you want? Because I really don't want to lie to you."_

 _"I'm just scared. . ." The girl began to cry softly, tears slowly falling from her eyes._

 _"I am too, but I'm not going to let that stop me." I said, taking her hands in mine, "I can't guarantee that we'll make it out alive, and I can't promise life will get easier if we manage to escape - but I can swear to you that whatever lies ahead of us out there can't be any worse then the hell we've endured in this prison." I told her, wiping her tears away._

 _"Y-You're right. . ." She hiccupped._

 _"Of course I am." I smiled, "Now why don't you stop looking at the negatives and focus on the positives."_

 _"Like what?" She blinked in confusion._

 _"Like. . .well like. . .I don't know, isn't there something you always wanted to do out there in the real world?" I asked her as she began to think._

 _"Well, there is one thing. . ."_

 _"Great, what is it?" I smiled._

 _"I guess I always did wonder what it'd be like to go to school like all the other girls. I saw it in a movie once and school looks like such a great place to have fun with all your friends." She explained, sharing the excitement of an average young girl's life in the real world, going into detail about the party's and assignments, the boys, friendships - all of it._

 _"That does sound cool."_

 _"Yeah, it'd be like a dream come true." She nodded, smiling at the window._

 _"Alright then, it's settled. When we're finally free we'll go to school together."_

 _"But what if-"_

 _"It's a promise." I cut her off, holding my pinky up to her face. There was doubt and worry mixed in her eyes but it was wiped away instantly by her smile before locking her pinky with mine._

 _"It's a promise." She laughed, falling on the bed and gazing up at the ceiling with hope._

 _"I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure we keep that promise." I told her before sitting down beside her._

 _"Really?" She asked, looking up at me._

 _"Yeah, because there's no way I'm going to let any of us die in here. . ."_

"Hey weirdo!"

"W-what?" I snapped out of my thoughts and turned my eyes to the redheaded jock sitting beside me.

"You've been staring into space for a while now."

"Oh, sorry. . ." I shook my head and began flipping through my notebook.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Yup." I answered immediately and began going over the pages. I flipped silently through my book, trying to find an easier way of understanding the chapter when I noticed him staring at me. A few seconds passed, maybe minutes, with me silently studying and him continuing to keep his eyes on me without ever turning away, making it difficult for me to focus on any work.

"Can you stop doing that?" I looked up at him.

"Doing what?" He shrugged, as if he didn't know.

"Staring at me."

"I wasn't staring at you?"

"West I could see-"

"Maybe it was you who was staring?" He said, wiggling his eyebrows in a strange manner that made it impossible to suppress a laugh.

"Right." I shook my head and turned my attention back to my notes.

"Don't worry, it can't be helped. How could you not stare at something so-"

"Revolting?"

"In your dreams, Adams." He scoffed.

"I think that would be a nightmare." I laughed quietly, not noticing the smile that had begun to form on his face.

"You smiled." He whispered.

"I laughed." I corrected him.

"A laugh isn't a laugh without a smile." He nudged, smiling wider than before.

"You're annoying." I rolled my eyes and tried focusing on the task at hand.

"And you're rude." He shrugged, "But you're actually pretty cute when you smile." He winked, making my face flush a bright red and bringing me to turn away in embarrassment.

"Y-You're stupid. . ." I stuttered, keeping my eyes on the ground in hopes of avoiding his gaze.

"Aw, did I make four eyes blush?" He laughed, poking my shoulder to get my attention.

"Shut up already." I glared, "And stop calling me four eyes. I have a name too, you know?"

"I know. You just never told me it." He shrugged.

"Because you never asked."

"Touché." He paused, "So then what is your name, freak?" He laughed again.

"You're not funny." I retorted, waiting for the laughs to fall and settle.

"I'm sorry," He nodded, "What's your name then?"

I exhaled slowly and looked at him, "It's Rose."

The room quickly fell silent and he didn't move or blink for a long second. He simply stared at me with a strange expression on his face that instantly brought along an awkward atmosphere.

"West?" I called out to him once.

"Y-Your names Rose?" He asked in a strange tone, waiting for a confirmation.

"Yeah?" I waited for him to speak again, to move and return to his usual self, but he remained that way for a few short moments, sending off a weird vibe before he shook his head and smiled.

"That's a nice name." He said before he let his eyes wander around the building.

"Are you okay?" I asked, concerned with his strange behavior moments ago.

"Never better." He smiled widely, and then, suddenly, a sense of nostalgia washed over me. The smile on his face reminded me of a certain redheaded child from years before. After realizing it I noticed the two were quite similar, annoying yet friendly. Almost like a puppy seeking attention - that's what West was. He played this completely different character with his group of 'friends' but there seemed to be more to him than others let on.

"So like I said before, you should smile more often. Who knows? Maybe someone might even want to hang out with you if you weren't so gloomy all the time." He told me, as if it were that simple.

"Let's get back to work." I muttered and returned back to studying the notebook when it was suddenly yanked away from my hands.

"Why do you always do that?" He asked, annoyed while holding my notebook in his hands.

"Give that back west- "

"Answer the question first." He insisted.

"What are you talking about?" I squinted, reaching for my notebook.

"I'm talking about you always going all emo robot all the time. You're constantly shutting off your feelings and letting people walk all over you without a care at all. That's not normal." He managed to say before I snatched the book back from his hand.

"I don't know what you mean." I shrugged.

"Maybe you don't see it, but I do. It's kind of depressing watching someone who acts like she doesn't feel like caring about anything-"

"Well we all can't be as great as you, now can we?" I mocked, shoving my notebook in my bag.

"What's that suppose to mean?" He asked, grabbing tightly onto my bag.

"Let it go." I snarled, pulling on it while he did the same.

"Finish what you had to say." He grinned.

"Fine," I forced a smile, "You want to hear the truth? Then here it is. You live in a completely different world than I do. One where you get to go home to a loving family and go to a school where everybody worships you. You have no clue what it's like to live in my shoes." I told him as we stared off for a few moments in silence.

"Alright, I'll admit I don't know what it's like to be you - but my life isn't as glamorous as you make it out to be." He said, throwing my bag to the floor, "But all I'm hearing from you are excuses. That doesn't answer the question on why you feel the need to always go all creepy robot on us?" He laughed in his chair, placing a foot over my bag.

"Maybe it's because my life never turns out so great. I mean, _you_ were the one who threatened to make my life hell on the first day." I reminded him. He rolled his eyes and picked my bag up from off the floor, wiping it clean before tossing it to me.

"I was wrong to do that, okay? But I'm really not a bad guy." He tried to defend himself.

"Then what kind of guy are you?" I asked him but was given a long moment of silence before he answered. He opened his mouth to say something at first but only let out a heavy sigh. There was confusion in his eyes and uncertainty and for a second he reminded me almost of myself, lost and confused about his own identity and purpose.

"I guess I'm just. . . a fraud." He said uneasily.

"Why do you say that?" I asked, pitying the boy who clearly hid behind some form of façade like that of my own.

"Because just like you everyone at this school, at home, and everywhere I go, you all think of me as this glorious being. It's because of that reason that I'm always trying to live up to everyone's expectation's of me. . ."

"Why don't you just do what _you_ want to do?" I asked, curious to learn more about the schools famous jock.

"It's not that simple. I don't want to let anyone down. I can't just go around pretending like I don't care when I actually do. I'm not you." He sighed deeply, sinking in his chair miserably.

"So you think I just go along with everyone's bullshit because I don't _care_?"

"Am I wrong?" He looked up at me.

"Wally," I laughed lightly, "I care just as much as the next person. Just because I refuse to show it doesn't mean I'm actually a robot."

"But then why not defend yourself? Why don't you speak up if you care so much what people say or think about you?" He asked, confused by my sense of logic.

"Because, West, I know that I can't please every being on this planet. I also know that I can't attack everyone who comes at me either." I explained.

"So then, what? You plan on letting everyone just walk all over you?" He sat back up in his chair.

"I know where I stand and at the end of the day that should be enough. Besides, no matter what I do I can't change who I am or the fact that I'll be doomed into misery for as long as I shall breathe." I told him when I spotted the clock on the wall and realized we only had a few more minutes left before closing.

"Why do you say that?" He asked as I began packing up to leave.

"I don't know." I shrugged, and stepped out of my seat, "Maybe I'm just bad luck. . ." I muttered to myself and headed for the door when I was suddenly stopped and pulled back by the redhead's grip.

"What did you just say?" His eyes grew wide in shock.

"What are you-"

"Alright kids, time to pack up. The library is now closing!" The librarian announced through the speakers which made the redhead jump and release his hold on me.

"We should probably get going." I cleared my throat but he only laughed it off and grabbed his bag to get up.

"Yeah, probably."

We left the library together in silence after getting the librarian's signature on our tutor trackers. My mind fell at ease knowing I had one less thing to deal with this week, and the moment I stepped outside I was welcomed by the cool breeze brought along with the dark clouds hovering above me. Despite the harassment and the difficulties at home, for a moment all my worries had vanished with the gust of wind that washed over me. This was freedom, this was what we risked everything to accomplish and experience, and this was something I was determined to keep. . .

"Rose?" A tap on my shoulder reminded me I wasn't alone and I quickly turned to face the redhead behind me.

"Y-Yeah?"

"You planning on heading home alone in this weather?" He asked in concern of the dark skies.

"Like always." I nodded and started heading down my path when I was pulled back by him again.

"Well, I mean, I could walk you to your place if you want? For safety purposes." He offered.

"Thanks but I don't live nearby. . ." I laughed sheepishly.

"More of a reason to walk together." He insisted, standing close by me.

"I guess it's fine if it's to the bus stop."

"Alright then."

"Okay. . ." I nodded and began walking when he reached for my arm again.

"Wait-"

"What now?" I asked, trying to mask my irritation.

"Do you have to head home right this second?"

"Why?" I raised a brow in suspicion.

"Well we managed to go a whole session without killing each other. I say that calls for a celebration." He spoke excitedly.

"A celebration?"

"Yeah, let's go have some fun." He smiled widely again, sending red flags shooting across my eyes.

"Is it appropriate?" I asked, stepping a few feet away from the schools biggest man whore.

"Yeah? Why? Were you hoping for something different." He grinned flirtatiously, making me gag.

"Don't make me slap you, west." I threatened.

"I do prefer to steer clear of pain." He said jokingly and poked my arm, "I'm serious though. I know a good place to hang for some 'appropriate' fun."

"Fine." I laughed, and followed him down a different path.

I watched him from behind for a while, studying him, curious to learn more about the redheads true nature. There was something about him that felt almost nostalgic, yet the voices in my head screamed _beware_ with every step I took behind him _._ He was a threat, a risk, a challenge that no one dared to face. The boy who stood on top of all on campus and yet still felt like it wasn't enough. Though he fell in with a large group of people who admired and followed him, he gave off a sense of loneliness. There were many reasons that had me craving to learn more, and most of it was due to the curiosity of what the popular crowd was like, but I felt a big part of it was because he reminded me of something else, or better yet. . . Someone else. Despite the two being almost complete opposites he had a certain charm to him that was quite similar to the boy in that attic. That's why I followed. . .

 **Because he reminded me of _him._**


	15. Chapter 14: I'll Find You

Chapter 14: I'll Find You

Kid Flash

The skies had fallen darker after leaving school grounds with signs of rain soon approaching. Not only did I have homework and hero duties to worry about, but the cold air put me at risk of becoming unable to complete either of the two. Still, despite the heavy load I carried I couldn't seem to focus on anything other than the girl walking beside me. The weather didn't seem to affect her at all as she continued carrying the same expression she always had plastered on her face.

I hadn't planned on spending any more time with her after studying but I felt I couldn't let her go just yet. Whether it'd be because I felt guilty for the way I'd treated her before, or because she reminded me of someone else, I knew I had to do something to change her opinion of me. Even though I knew this might not change a thing, I didn't want her hating me. Especially when she shared the same name as _her. . ._

"So, did you invite me here because you wanted to go shopping or something?" She squinted, gazing up at me as we stood by the entrance of the mall.

"Or something." I shrugged and opened the door for her first.

"Somehow I'm starting to question your idea of 'fun'." She muttered before stepping inside.

"Just trust me."

The building was mostly empty with very little people wandering in the mall at this hour of the day. The bad weather, the pile of homework, and the hour made it safe to hang out without being seen by any of the other kids at school. It wasn't so much that I was ashamed of the girl targeted by most of the bullies on campus, but I didn't want to lose the image everyone had created for me and let them all down. If that were to happen then I'd be left behind again without a doubt. . .

"Where exactly are we headed?" The girl asked, her voice erasing the depressing thoughts swarming in my head.

"Oh it's, uh, over there." I pointed at the far end of the building that lit up in bright colorful lights.

"The arcade?" Her eyes narrowed, "This was your idea of fun? What are you eight?" She mocked.

"C'mon, who doesn't love killing time at the arcade?" I scoffed.

"If you have time to kill, why not use it to study more?"

"Don't be such a prude." I shook my head and took her hand, pulling her to our destination before she could say any more.

We started to look around after we stepped inside the gaming area but the girl refused to show any excitement or joy while wandering around the store with her arms crossed over her chest. After a few minutes of walking I started to feel that it wasn't mine, or the rest of the school's, fault for this girl's depressing mood. It seemed like for whatever reason she was set on making herself miserable all on her own, and whether people interacted with her or not she wouldn't care. She was making herself suffer alone and it irritated me greatly, but, it also made me feel sorry for her because of how much she reminded me of myself. . .

"You could at least pretend you're having fun, you know?" I told her.

"What?" She stopped, "You want me to lie to you?" She raised her brow at me.

"Of course not, sunshine." I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes.

"Let's just go home." She sighed.

"Do you act this way everywhere you go?"

"Yup." She quickly answered.

"C'mon, don't you have at least one game you normally play at an arcade?"

"No, I don't play games." She shrugged.

"What?" My eyebrows shot up, "So, you've never been to a place like this before?"

"What if I haven't?" She asked, gazing up at me.

"Then that would explain a lot." I laughed lightly, "I mean, didn't your parents ever take you to, like, Chuck E. Cheese or something?"

"They couldn't. . ." She said, clearing her throat.

"Why not?" I asked, curiously.

"Because I don't have any parent's." She said simply, as if it were a normal thing.

"What do you mean you don't have-"

"I mean they didn't want me, okay?" She shrugged and went on ahead of me to end the conversation. I walked behind her for a few moments as she looked at everything in the store carefully with the same blank expression. The atmosphere had grown heavy and uncomfortable as we moved around the shop, and I searched around to think of someway to break the awkward silence.

"Hey check this out!" I grabbed her arm and pulled her over to the first game I spotted.

"What is it?" She asked, staring at the puppet man in the box with his hands placed over a crystal ball.

"It's Zoltar." I said, pointing at the name painted over the glass case.

"Okay smartass," She glared, "I meant what does it do?"

"It tells you your fortune for the small price of a dollar." I explained, reaching for my wallet in my back pocket, "Wanna play?"

"Pass." She rolled her eyes and began to head in the opposite direction.

"C'mon!" I whined, pulling her back, "Just try it." I told her before sliding the dollar into the machine.

"This is stupid." She sighed and watched as the machine lit up.

 _"Come closer and listen to what Zoltar has to tell you. . ."_ The puppet said, _"For I tell you it is true. The smallest good deed is better than the grandest intention. Take it from me, the great Zoltar, intending shall get you nowhere - but doing, yes, that will bring you much, much reward. . ."_ The puppet continued speaking, waving his hand over the crystal ball, until a card slipped out and the machine shut off again.

"That's it?" She stared down at the card hanging out.

"Take it." I nudged.

"Why do I have to take it?" She looked at me suspiciously.

"To hear your fortune, obviously."

"But why do I-"

"Just do it!" I ordered, pushing her closer to the machine.

"How annoying." She groaned, bending down and taking the card given to her before reading it silently to herself.

"What does it say?" I asked, leaning in to get a better look.

" _The crystal gazer has wonderful things in store for you. You will be reunited with the one you once found dear. You have a patient disposition and that patience will soon be rewarded. . ."_ She paused and looked up at me for a moment, "This really is stupid." She said before sliding the card in her pocket.

"You're no fun." I said indignantly.

"Sorry to disappoint." She said monotonously.

"Whatever, I wanna try now." I said and slipped in another dollar to play again. The machine began to speak like before, it's head moving up and down while his hands moved over the crystal ball in a circular motion. I had grown irritated with the girl beside me, and questioned why I had decided to bring her along in the first place, until my eyes had caught a quick glance at her as the puppet continued talking. There was a small twinkle in her eyes and the same old expression she carried had vanished for a moment, replaced with one of curiosity and a tinge of excitement. It reminded me of that of a child that had just discovered a newly made toy, and I couldn't help but smile at the girl who had lost herself in the puppets words for a moment.

 _". . .Be sure to play again."_ The puppet finished before another card slipped out for me to read. I reached down and took the card in my hand, bringing it closer to me before I began silently reading the fortune to myself.

 _"You are a strong disbeliever of fate and for that the ancients warn you of the obstacles soon approaching. In little time you will come to know your soul mate and the love of your life, but will be forced to choose between the two in order to move forward. Think carefully before making a decision, for it may guide you toward a different path. . ."_ The card's words echoed in my head, repeating itself for a while as my mind began to ponder over the strange prediction.

"What does it say?" The girl asked, reaching for my card before I slipped it into my back pocket.

"It, uh, said that my future looks. . . bleak." I forced a laugh, "And that I should buy someone a drink." I told her as she stared at me suspiciously.

"It did not." She said, shooting right through my lie.

"It's a dumb game anyway." I tried agreeing with her previous comment.

"I don't know. I kind of liked it. . ." She shrugged, staring back at the puppet who continued watching us.

"Really?" I smiled excitedly at the progress she'd made.

"Why does that make you happy?" She stepped back.

"Because all I've heard from you today is how stupid and dumb everything is here. It's nice to see you found something you actually enjoyed." I told her, staring back at the girl who watched me for a long moment before a small smile formed on her lips.

"You're definitely weirder than I expected." She laughed lightly.

"Sorry to disappoint?" I frowned.

"You didn't. I'm just curious to know what the real Wally West is like, because I already know he's nothing like how he appears to be at school."

"What do you mean?" I blinked, confused by her statement.

"I don't know. I mean you have everything and yet it feels like you walk around feeling secretly miserable and alone, despite having so many people around that worship you."

"Well I don't know about that, but your wrong about me having 'everything'. My life's not all that great." I told her before heading down the store in search for a different game to pass the time.

"Okay then," She started, following beside me, "what exactly is your life like?" She asked.

"You really want to know?"

"I've got nothing better to do than to listen." She said coolly, making me laugh.

"Well I'm not this big bad guy you make me out to be."

"Okay, then who exactly are you?"

"I already told you I'm just a-"

"Fraud? That's what you said before, but why? I mean, who exactly is _Wally West?"_ She stopped.

"I don't know. . ." I paused, "Maybe I'm just scared." I laughed at myself, avoiding the girl's eyes that seemed to have the ability to see right through me.

"Of. . .?" She asked, tilting her head to the side like a confused child.

"Everything? Failing at everything, letting everyone down, having them hate me-"

"Why does that matter to you so much?" She squinted, "You can't please everyone you meet, West. You do realize that don't you?"

"Yeah, but they all expect so much from me. My family, friends, the team - everyone. If I make one bad move and let them down then-"

"Then what?"

"They'll ditch me!" I snapped. The Adam's girl jumped in surprise at my sudden outburst and a shot of guilt hit me right after raising my voice.

"West. . . "

"Let's just drop this." I sighed, staring down at my feet.

"No." She said sternly, "West, you can't seriously think that your friends would just ditch for something like that right?"

"It wouldn't surprise me if they did. . ." I shrugged, falling back against the wall and sliding myself down to sit on the floor.

"West," She bent down, "You're an idiot."

"Gee, thanks for the confidence boost."

"No," She sighed before sitting on the ground beside me, "I mean that you're dumb if you actually think anyone would just ditch you because you couldn't make them happy all the time? Most of the girls at the school waste away trying to just make you happy and here you are doing the opposite and feeling miserable about it. It's stupid." She said, placing the back of her head on the wall.

"You just don't get it." I shook my head and turned my eyes away from her.

"Okay, then tell me? What am I missing here?"

"It's happened before. Whenever I mess things up people leave and it's always because of me. . ." I tried to explain.

"Like who?" She asked, trying to pry in more than anyone else had ever dared.

"My parent's and. . . someone else." Unable to say anymore the air fell silent. I stared down at the ground for a while, fearing the pity I might find in her eyes like everyone else who had heard my story. The kid who lost his parents as a child was enough to get people feeling sorry for me, but that alone irritated me even more. I tried to control my anger and mask away my irritation if I found her staring at me the same way the others did. That's what I was prepared to find, to discover that same pity as all the rest, but when I gazed up at her there was something else instead. It wasn't sadness nor pity but something stronger. . . angrier.

"Okay? I'm not going to sugar coat anything for you, West." She began, "Whatever happened back then must have sucked and all, but don't expect people to sympathize with you because of it. You have the choice to live with it and move on or stay stuck on something that no longer matters because, truthfully, no one is going to care. Why? Because at the end of the day, no matter how bad your life gets, someone out there is always going to have it far worse then you - I guarantee it." She stated, finishing her lecture. You could see in her eyes that she was speaking from experience and personal hardships, and despite knowing little about the girl, I understood where she was coming from. Her lecture was passionate and honest, far different from those I'd ever heard in the past, and I couldn't help but laugh at the strange girl sitting beside me.

"You don't like holding back at all, do you?" I smiled at her and watched as her face flushed a bright pink color.

"I'm only telling you the truth for your sake." She turned her away from me, "Besides, it's stupid watching you trying to please everyone who's already trying to please you. If you were all just honest with each other things wouldn't be as complicated."

"Good point." I nodded before pushing myself back up, "I'll remember that next time." I said, giving her my hand and helping her back up on her feet.

"Well I'm glad I could help." She smiled softly, "So, are we going to play or what?" She asked while looking at the various games surrounding us at the moment.

"Sure, why don't we-"

"I told you there wouldn't be anyone out here this late!" A familiar voice yelled while entering the store and my eyes almost immediately fell on the group of boys who had just walked in.

"Isn't that your idiot friend?" The adam's girl asked after spotting Gary with the rest of the guys from the team run around the store.

"We have to go." I whispered, bending down and grabbing the girls hand.

"Why?" She asked, following me as we headed for the exit.

"They can _not_ see us together after that fight in the halls." I explained, "Just follow me and stay quiet." I begged her as we ran out of the store with our heads down. We rushed out as fast as we could manage and left the area without every looking back, and, despite having lost them ages ago, we continued running until we were out of the building and far away from anyone that could recognize our faces.

Once we were outside we stopped to catch our breath. The light of day had completely vanished but the stars and moon were completely covered by dark clouds that had grown heavier compared to when we had arrived. Now that we had managed to escape in one piece reality began to come crashing right back to me, reminding me of all my duties and the risk of spending time with a girl I was meant to steer clear of for both our sakes. Still, there was something in me that couldn't turn away from her. I wasn't sure what it was or why but it felt strangely comfortable to be around her. Almost as if we had known each other for a long time. . .

"I'm heading home." She said in a steady tone.

"I'll walk you to the- "

"Don't." She raised her hand to me.

"Why not?" I asked, confused by her sudden change of mood.

"If you don't want to be seen with me than it's smarter to just stay away from me all together." She said before she started walking.

"Wait a second," I ran up to her, "I never said I didn't want to be seen with-"

"West," She stopped for a moment, "I'm not an idiot. I already know how ashamed you'd be if your friends caught us hanging out, and that's fine I get it."

"I'm not ashamed of anything." I told her.

"Whatever it is, we all know that you're clearly too scared to do anything that others will judge you harshly for, including being seen with me, but for your sake I hope you learn to get past that fear if you plan on not feeling miserable all the time." She shrugged, patting my shoulder before walking past me and heading down her path alone. I tried calling out to her a few times as she grew further and further away but she simply ignored me and eventually disappeared from my sight. . .

I knew she was right and the fact that she could see right through me the entire time annoyed me. I had dropped my guard continuously around her and accidentally allowed myself to get lost in the conversation. I was well aware of the fact that this Rose and the Rose of my past were two completely different people, but they seemed to be similar in so many ways. The way she looked, spoke, reacted - all of it. Even though I knew that was impossible because despite the similarities the facts were still clear. The Rose I knew was still out there, possibly alive, and no matter how similar they were it wouldn't change anything because they'd never be the same person. The faster I understood that, the better my chances were in searching for her and uncovering the truth. . .

 **And there was nothing that would stop me from doing so.**


	16. Chapter 15: A Monsters Cry

Chapter 15: A Monsters Cry

Jinx

The bell dismissed us for lunch and brought everyone rushing out of their seats to escape class. I grabbed my belongings and waited for everyone else to leave the room before me, not wanting to get mixed up with any of the students who were out to get me. However, despite the regular harassment, things had gotten better compared to when I first arrived on campus. The jocks were satisfied enough to ignore me, the blonde Barbie was caught up searching for her Ken to pay any more attention to me, and the rest of the school seemed to have forgotten I even existed and made no effort to interact with me anymore.

My life was just getting better.

No more hiding, fighting, and arguing with people lesser than me. Despite not holding any fear towards them, due to the fact that I could easily send each of them flying into their graves with a snap of my finger, I was glad at how quiet things had become at school. This was more than enough for me because now I didn't have anything else to worry about whenever I returned to campus. All that was needed was for me to play along with the non meta-humans in order to keep my identity a secret and my promise. It was nothing more but a game that I needed to stay ahead in if I wanted to continue taking part in the teenage civilian life. . .

And I had no intentions of losing any time soon.

"Hey four eyes!" The jock, better known as Gary, called out to me.

"What is it now?" I asked as he came over.

"Good job on my math, keep it up so that I can get a passing grade." He grinned, patting my head roughly.

"What are you talking about? I didn't do your math homework?" I snarled, shoving his hand away from me.

"Well I mean you pretty much did by doing Wally's work. You just do what you're suppose to and you wont have to worry about anything else." He grinned, shoving me to the wall before moving down the hall to head out for lunch.

"Wally's work? What is that idiot talking about. . .?" I muttered to myself before following the rest of the crowd down the hall.

The cafeteria reeked of different mixtures of food piled together that made my stomach churn. I made my way to the empty blue table at the far end of the room, skipping the schools dreadful meal, and taking out my homework to review for my final periods. The room was buzzing with noise and the chattering of students gossiping, chewing, and/or texting made it almost difficult to focus on any of my work.

The sky through the cafeteria windows were still heavy as before. The grey clouds hovering above had a tint of blue to them that reminded me of an old childhood dream. A place to escape to, high above where no one could find me. A world where I could sleep peacefully and the sun always shined brightly. . .

My castle in the sky.

The thought of it now made me laugh at how the years had changed me. Those childhood memories seemed to be so far away now that I had aged and matured. After discovering the true face of reality the world had fallen into nothing more but a bleak and colorless universe. A universe that crushed the hopes and desires of the child I once was, shattering all dreams I carried before in the past. However, there was no one else to blame but myself for dreaming so high only to come crashing down even harder.

This was my punishment. . .

"Mind if I sit with you?" Someone asked behind me, tapping my shoulder to catch my attention. When I looked up at the stranger staring over me I recognized her as the raven haired girl from the bathroom incident. The girl I'd been trying to avoid and keep from bumping into out of fear of what she may have known about me. . .

"Do whatever you want. Not like I own the place." I tried to keep my voice steady, disguising my true suspicion with a blank expression.

"I've been trying to find you all day." She smiled, placing her tray on the table and taking the seat next to mine.

"Oh?" I watched the girl who sat beside me innocently. Unable to tell what she was plotting by interacting with me in public.

"I'm Linda by the way. Linda Park-"

"I didn't ask." I cut her off, letting the conversation fall dead silent before I attempted to continue on with reviewing my work.

"You're friends with Wally West, right?"

And there it was, the reason she'd made the effort to approach me. She was nothing more but another victim who had fallen for the redhead's 'charm'. She must have suspected something just like the blonde bimbo who had jumped me just for being assigned his lab partner. She was no different than the rest of the students on campus or the girl's who worshipped the school's 'god'.

"Not at all."

"Oh, I just assumed because of how he defended you in the halls the other day." She laughed nervously, turning to the windows and watching the redhead flirt with various females by the tables outside.

"He was just trying to keep his buddy from getting into any trouble. . ." I said, watching the redhead who accidentally locked eyes with me for a moment before he returned his attention to his many admirers surrounding him. "People like him don't associate with people like me."

"People like you?" She repeated, puzzled by my words.

"I'm going to the library." I decided, stepping out of my seat and shoving everything back into my bag.

"Wait, don't!" The girl cried, tugging at my sleeves, "You can't leave yet." She begged.

"Why not?" I pulled away from her.

"Because. . . because we haven't spoken much and-"

"Listen," I sighed, "I'm not interested in making new friends. So, just leave me alone." I told her before grabbing my things and heading for the exit.

"But I came back for you!" She yelled, making me stop dead in my tracks.

"What did you say. . .?" I slowly turned to the girl who was now standing by the table with a pained expression on her face.

"I-I didn't want to say it like this, but how else. . . how else can I get you to understand if you keep running away from me?" She asked, her voice shaking as she breathed.

"Who are you?" I demanded to know with a stern face.

She bit her lip anxiously, "I just wanted to-"

"Who are you!?" I shouted, accidentally bringing a small amount of unwanted attention our way.

"You seriously don't know?" She asked, offended.

"Quit wasting my time." I whispered. Not wanting to attract anymore strangers to our conversation.

"How many Linda's do you even know?" She scoffed, "I mean, I know we don't look that much a like, but you should at least feel some kind of connection with the person who shares half of the same blood."

"What are you talking a-" My words were caught and thrown away when it finally struck me. Linda, The girl I used to pray for salvation, the one who failed to return to my side, and abandoned me like all the rest. . .

 _". . .No one's coming to save you."_

 _"You're wrong! Linda swore we'd all be together again. She promised me. . ."_

"No. . ." I placed a hand over my mouth, "You can't be. . ."

"It's good to see you too, sis." She whispered, smiling up at me as if everything had been solved and forgiven by our reuniting.

"Don't call me that." I told the traitor who's smiled quickly vanished by my harsh tone.

"I know how angry you must be. I would be too if-"

"If you were left behind by the one person you thought you could rely on?" I added, glaring at the girl I admired greatly as a child.

"You don't get it, Rose. You don't know how hard it was to reach you. I did all I could, it wasn't like I forgot about you-"

"But you did."

"No I didn't!" She screamed, "I really tried to search for you but after the adoption fell through there was nothing I could do. My parent's wouldn't listen to-"

"Your parents?" I hissed, "So you managed to be part of a new family and left me behind to fend for myself?" I laughed at the irony of the situation. The sister I once admired as a hero had easily betrayed me by tossing me to the side to start anew, morphing me into the monster they created.

"I didn't mean to, but what could I do? I was just a kid, we both were, none of the adults would listen to me-"

"Just stop." I took in a deep breath, "I don't want to here any of your excuses. Whatever happened with you won't change the hell I've endured on my own since mom ditched us. . ."

"Rose, I just want us to be together again. I want us to be a family again. If you'd hear me out and met my family, maybe we could all-"

"No!" I whispered frantically, "I don't want to be part of anything with you anymore. You have your own life and I have mine, and I'd prefer to keep them separate." I told her, stepping a few feet away.

"It doesn't have to be this way, Rose. We finally have a chance now-"

"Enough!" I shouted, "I don't need you to save me. The one who needed saving was the little girl you abandoned to create a new life for yourself. So enjoy it while you can, but as far as I know - My sister died a long time ago. . ." My words cut her deeply and I could see the hurt in her eyes.

I turned my back away from the raven haired girl and ran out of the cafeteria without ever looking back. It wasn't that I was truly upset with her, I was well aware of the reasons we could never meet, and it wasn't because I blamed her for any of the pain inflicted upon me. It was the fact that I couldn't return to her side because the little sister she once knew no longer existed. The moment my heart stopped beating during those painful experiments, the moment my mother decided to abandon me in that attic, the day my innocence was stolen in that dark room that dreadful night, the moment terra was left behind in that prison, and the day I was taken away from Rudolph - all these event's had destroyed the child I used to be. . . until it killed me.

The Rose Adam's that existed in her memories was gone, and her replacement was none other than the Hive Five's notorious leader; Jinx. This was who I was now, and it was far too late to change now. I'd come so far over the years and I refused to allow myself to fall right back to where I started by reuniting with the sister I once cherished and admired. I'd be nothing more but a disappoint to her. . . just like my mother.

"Seymour, can you hear me?" I whispered into the communicator, keeping my voice steady as I spoke and hid behind a vending machine in the halls.

"Jinx? What's wrong?" The boy asked in concern.

"Nothing." I lied, "I need you and the others to stay together until I get home."

"Okay, but why? You sure nothing's wrong?" He asked again, always able to see right through my façade.

"No, everything's going to get a lot better now. I'm going to fix thing's and get us a spot with the brotherhood of evil no matter what. . ."

"Um, jinx. . . Did you hit your head or have you forgotten that we're currently on some seriously bad terms with the Brotherhood of Evil at the moment?" He reminded me, as I thought to myself for a moment before saying another word.

"You're right, "I grinned, "But I might have a plan that could change all of that."

"This is going to be bad isn't it?" He asked, making me laugh quietly before signing off. I had allowed myself to get caught up in too much that I had forgotten my original goals. This time I'd go all out without any hesitation, and I wasn't going to let any of these distractions stand in my way any longer. There was no use in trying to find the innocent being I used to be, she was gone now and I couldn't waste away hoping to find her again someday. There was no changing that, no turning back time, all I could do was sit back and accept what I'd become. Nothing more and nothing less. . .

 **Than a monster.**


	17. Chapter 16: Tonight All Is Revealed

Chapter 16: Tonight All Is Revealed

Kid Flash

The lights of jump city lit up brightly from a distance as I sat outside the titan's tower. The shimmering stars that hung above were slowly being eaten away by dark clouds that had spread from my town. The ocean, however, remained the same. Constantly moving and crashing against the rocks I sat on to enjoy the view I couldn't get back home. This was what I needed - a distraction. Despite the annoying buzzing sound my phone kept receiving by my Uncle's never-ending calls.

"Wally?" The boy wonder called for me.

"And the moment's ruined." I groaned as the masked hero sat down next to me.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, suspiciously.

"What? Am I not welcomed here anymore?"

"You know that's not what I meant." He nudged my arm.

"How was I to know? I'm no mind reader." I joked and returned back to viewing the city lights.

"Seriously, what's been going on with you lately?" Robin asked with a mixture of curiosity and worry in his tone.

"What do you mean?" I forced a laugh.

"Don't mask it," The boy wonder said, "I can already tell there's something that's been bugging you a lot more lately."

"You're probably right, as usual. No one can hide anything from the guy who spent his weekends hanging out with the world's greatest detective." I teased, trying to change the subject before things got too heavy.

"KF," He removed his mask, "You can trust me. You know that, right?"

"Yeah. . ." I nodded, releasing a deep sigh before laying down on the rocks to gaze up at the dark sky.

"Is it a family thing?" He tried to guess.

"No, it's uh. . . something else."

"Alright, if you don't want to talk about it-"

"We've been best friends for a long time, right?" I waited for him to respond.

"Yeah?" He nodded once.

"So why is it still difficult to talk to you about certain things when you're always quick to judge everything-"

"Is this about jinx?" He guessed again.

"No. . .yes? Sort of." I sputtered, "My point is that you're a great leader and teammate, but sometimes I feel like whenever I want to talk to you as Dick you go right into Robin Mode."

He nodded and exhaled deeply, "You're right. I do tend to get too serious in situations it isn't needed. . ."

"And I get that you only do it because you're concerned, but right now the person I want to talk to is _you_ , Richard Grayson, not Robin the boy _blunder_."

"Alright, fine." He sighed, as I sat back up to continue our conversation, "I'm all ears, no harsh judgment here."

"Really?" I squinted, hesitant to say another word.

"Really." He nodded, "So, what's been eating at you that you had to run all the way to jump city?"

"I just needed an escape. . ."

"You have your own room for that. The fact you didn't go there instead means you wanted to be away from everyone, including your family. What could be so bothering you this much that you'd need to come here for some time away?" The boy wonder asked, piecing everything together in his head.

"I guess it was all just starting to get to me with school, homework, practice. . .the memories."

"Memories?" He echoed, "What memories?" He asked, as I took in a deep breath before sharing any more.

"Remember how I told you about the night my parent's died?"

"Is that what's been bugging you?" He stared at me.

"No, well, not really. . ." I said as I watched the waves crash against the rocks underneath us.

"Then what is?"

"Back then. . ." I started, "After their death my Aunt was suppose to take custody over me, but because she was always working, and her job required travelling to different places, they didn't feel she could take full responsibility for me. So, I stayed at someone else's place for a while. A foster home. . ."

"But I thought you went to live with her right after?"

"No, it wasn't that simple." I sighed, looking back up at the boy who watched me, "My uncle was the reason she was able to even win custody, because he could take care of me whenever she was away at work." I explained.

"So, why are you upset about that?" He raised his eyebrow.

"I'm not. That wasn't the reason. . ."

"Then what is?" He asked, confused with where the conversation was headed.

"Well, at the time when I was living away from my Aunt I was staying in this attic at some old hag's place." I shudder at the image of the woman that flashed in my head, "Anyway, when I was staying there I met someone - a girl. . ."

"A girl?" He repeated.

"Yeah." I nodded, "Her name was Rose. We only spoke for a while but she was my first friend at that place." A smile drew on my face at the memory of her and the moment we shared together.

"What happened to her?" The boy asked, triggering the events that occurred afterwards in my head, and erasing the smile off my face.

"I don't know. . ." I took in a deep breath before continuing, "We only talked once before she was taken away. . ." I stopped for a moment to remember the stranger in a black suit I had loathed over the years for his crime, "Rose was just handed right over like a piece of property. They took her away somewhere no one could ever find her. . ."

"So was it some kind of kidnapping then?" Robin thought.

"That's what I assumed at first, but when I went to the police about it they couldn't find any files to prove she even existed. She was the perfect victim. Nobody would miss her or notice she was gone, and it wouldn't be called kidnapping if they couldn't prove her identity, right?"

"That would be pretty tough." He agreed, gazing up at the sky to ponder on the idea for a moment.

"But I know she was real - I saw her. I watched them drag her out and disappear with a group of other children the cops couldn't prove ever existed either."

"So it was a group? It might have been some form of trafficking, but it's definitely odd that the police wouldn't have any record of the children that had vanished that night-"

"And it was my fault. . ." I muttered to myself, "I was the one who got her in trouble by talking to her. I was the reason she got taken away after I promised that I'd help-"

"Enough." He cut me off with a slap to the head.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"Listen, Kid Moron-" He spoke sternly, "None of that was your fault. That woman must have been plotting to give that girl away beforehand if she had went through all the trouble of erasing her identity. You were a kid - there was nothing you could have done."

"You don't know that!" I screamed, "I could have saved her somehow. I could have fought harder-"

"How? It was you against people powerful enough to convince the cops these children never _existed_. If you had done anything wrong you could have disappeared too." He explained, trying to convince me that I wasn't to blame for the mess I had clearly caused.

"At least I could have kept her safe. Wherever she was. . ." I sighed, falling back on the ground again.

"Is that why you're so set on saving Jinx?" The boy asked, hitting the nail right on the head.

"Dick, I couldn't even save a little girl? What good am I if I can't at least save Jinx. . ."

"She isn't your responsibility, Wally."

"I know that, but I can't help it. Whenever I'm fighting against her something inside me thinks back to that moment and it's almost like I can see _her_ in Jinx. . ." I paused for a moment, letting everything fall silent before I began to laugh at the irony that was my life, "But I guess I shouldn't be talking like that. I go around trying to save people from bad situations, but at school I'm part of the reason bad situations even arise. . ."

"I don't think I'll ever fully understand you or the choices you make in the real world, but, you're not a bad person, Wally." He tried to comfort me.

"Nope, I just make some pretty bad decisions." I let out a deep sigh, "That's just the story of my life I guess. The guy the world praises as a hero is also the same guy who goes around harassing half of the dweebs on campus. . ."

"It doesn't have to be that way you know?" He looked back at me.

"Yeah, I know. . ." I nodded before spending the next few moments silently watching the glowing city far away from us.

There was no ignoring or going around it. The facts were that I was no better than the criminals I fought on the streets. I would never lay a hand on a human being without reason, and I wouldn't intentionally harm those weaker than me to entertain myself, but that didn't stop me from behaving like the bad guy on campus. Did I enjoy it? No. Did that stop me? Not at all. If I didn't follow the others then they wouldn't follow me, and that would risk losing all my power and letting everyone else down - the same way I let _her_ down. . .

"Robin!" Raven called out, exiting the tower as the boy wonder quickly placed his mask back on in a panic.

"What is it?" He asked, getting back up on his feet to speak to the cloaked figure.

"There's been a break in at the prison."

"A prison break?" I jumped back up.

"It's the Hive Five, and I have a feeling I know who they're after." She said.

"Me too." Robin added, turning to me, "You in?"

"Y-Yeah. . ." I nodded, rushing back into the tower to join the others.

It seemed like wherever I went Jinx followed and no matter what I decided, whether it be to help her or arrest her, she'd keep coming back. Still, there were things I needed to know. Things only she seemed to hold the answers to, and it started with that pendant around her neck. How she got it? where she got it? why she had it? There were millions of questions running through my head but what I really wanted to know about was the connection she had with Rose, or if it were something far greater than that. Tonight would be the night I uncovered the truth. . .

 **And I wasn't going back home without an answer.**


	18. Chapter 17: Secrets and Lies

Chapter 17: Secrets and Lies

Jinx

The alarms rang out and brought angry eyes staring at us through rusty metal bars. The prison guards had dropped unconscious in no time due to the impact of Mammoth's fists the moment we broke in. This was the biggest risk any of us had taken in a long time, and if we were to fail they would never let us live it down, _but_ success would guarantee a bright future by the Russian woman's side and that was something I couldn't pass up again.

"How much longer?" Mammoth groaned, sending death glares at the caged criminals eyeing us.

"Couldn't you have disabled the alarms before letting mammoth crash a hole in the wall?" Billy whined, pressing his hands over his ears to block out the echoing alarm piercing our eardrums.

"Quiet! I can't think with you idiots yammering so much!" Gizmo complained, typing into his laptop and immediately silencing the sirens that gave away our element of surprise.

"Finally. . ." See-more exhaled deeply, removing his hands away from his ears and letting them drop to his sides.

"Let's just get this over with-" I instructed, "Mammoth start by prying open the cell- "

"No!" Gizmo yelled frantically, "You can't touch the cell doors!"

"Why not?" I asked, as he began typing into his computer.

"They're made with a special kind of material that's keeping each prisoner from using their powers. That's why they can't break out on their own! If we just bust it open who knows what damage it might do to the rest of us!" He warned.

"Alright? So if we can't touch them then how do we get them _out_?" I asked the small genius already working on his next move.

"If I can hack into the prisons operating system I might be able to disable the- "

"Great, you do that." See-more yawned.

"Just try and finish before the titan's get here. Which I'm sure will be very soon after setting off all the alarms." I finished before turning away from them and heading further down the prison.

"Where are you going?" See-more asked, following behind.

"To find who we came here for."

"Then I'm coming too." He said before rushing over to my side and leaving the others to carry out the rest of the plan.

We walked silently together, side by side, ignoring the glares and harsh comments received by the prisoners who watched us venture further. There had been so much that had occurred over the months that had passed us, and most of it felt surreal. The meetings, reuinions, and opportunities had been rammed into such a short amount of time that my head ached just thinking about it. What was I to do now? Was I doing the right thing? Would I regret my decisions later on? And would any of this work out the way I'd hoped it would? There were so many questions piling up in my brain that it became difficult to focus on anything else anymore. Whatever lay ahead was unknown to us, but I swore to myself that I would protect this family at all cost - and that's exactly what I was going to do. . .

"Did something happen at school?" See-more asked, worry clearly heard in his tone.

"Not really." I forced a smile, "We should probably keep searching, though." I said after quickening my pace.

"You know you can talk to me about anything, right?" He assured me.

"Yeah, of course I do." I nodded, searching through each cell in hopes of finding the Russian beast.

"Really? Why is that?" He asked, making me stop to look at him.

"What do you mean 'why'?"

"Why do you trust me so much?" He shrugged, moving in closer.

"Because we're family." I reminded him.

"Is that really all I am to you? Nothing more than that? Even after that kiss-"

"See-more stop it." I cut him off, "Don't go there."

"What exactly am I to you, Jinx? A friend? A toy? Because I can easily tell you that I don't just see you as- "

"Enough!" I yelled, stepping back, "Don't ruin this for us. Why can't you be satisfied with what we have now?"

"Because I want more, Rose!"

"Don't-" I ran up to him, "Call me that." I whispered.

"We've been doing this for too long now, _Jinx._ The flirting and kissing might be enough to keep you happy but it's selfish if you don't take my feelings under consideration."

"What do you want from me, See-more?" I asked, praying for an answer to help put an end to the pained expression he carried in front of me. There was a long pause, and all he did was stare at me for a while until he made an attempt to speak up before being interrupted by a certain criminal we'd been seeking.

"Yes, vhat is it dat you truly vant, See-more?" The woman echoed, standing in the cell at the far end of the building. She watched us with an evil grin plastered on her face, mocking us as if we were less than those being held behind bars.

"I'm heading back." He muttered before returning to the others.

"See-more!" I called out to him but he refused to respond or look back, and I knew I had deeply hurt him again with my thoughtlessness.

"Dat's too bad. I vas hoping your little show vould continue on a bit longer." The woman laughed, sitting against a wall in her cage.

"We didn't come here to entertain you."

"Oh? Den vhat is dee reason for your arrival?" The woman smirked.

"To break you out - all of you." I said, glancing at the prisoners listening in on our conversation.

"Vhy?" She asked, pushing herself off the floor.

"To prove to you just how powerful we really are." I said steadily.

"Powerful? Perhaps. But I am no longer sure if you are vorthy. After all, dee only reason vee are here is because you led zee kid flash right to our location." She scoffed, turning her back to face me.

"We had nothing to do with him or the titans finding us that night." I lied.

"Oh really?" She laughed, "How can you prove dat?" She asked, slowly turning back to look at me.

"I can't." I shrugged, "But you can't exactly prove that we were the ones who led them right to you, can you?" I grinned.

"I suppose you are correct. . . for now." She smirked, watching me carefully in hopes of seeing me sweat.

"Well then I guess -"

"Jinx!" The squeaking voice of our little genius screamed from the front of the building.

"Look's like trouble has arrived. How amusing." The woman said before stepping back into her little cage.

My heart sank as it normally did whenever I heard the screams of my teammates on their own. I rushed as fast as I could to find them, hoping I'd have enough time to end whatever had occurred with me gone. We had been so close with completing our plans, and success was right around the corner - so close I could _feel_ it. But not matter what we did, how hard we tried, we always seemed to fail because of _me._ All our misfortune and misery were caused due to my existence. Whether it'd be good or bad I'd always fail and that meant unintentionally dragging the rest down with me every single time. . .

"Jinx!" See-more called this time while dodging the redheaded alien's attacks, "We have to get out of here!"

"But the prisoners -"

"There's no more time for that!" Gizmo hollered, abandoning the scraps of his computer on the ground to outrun the metal man chasing after him. The others battled against each titan in hopes of escaping and avoiding being caged away with the other criminals in the building. And as moments passed the battle raged on without any care. The explosions, the chases, the screams - all of it was nothing more but a huge part of a never ending war between 'good' and 'evil'. These so called 'heroes', who went around locking whoever they felt were a threat to society, were the one's who were truly responsible for this whole mess in the first place.

But who were they to judge _us?_

Always marching around playing god for the good of the nation. Being praised by taking down criminals in order to increase their own rank in society, never bothering to listen to the lives they so easily destroyed. We never wanted this, we never had a say, and we never planned in taking part in any of this. They did this to us and made us who we are today. The _freaks_ , the _monsters_ , the _criminals_ the world now hated us for because of how they portrayed us to be. It was their fault that we'd become this way and why we were constantly on the run. . . but not anymore.

Because I wasn't running away this time.

"Let's get out of here!" Billy screamed as the rest of the guys huddle around Kyd Wykkyd to escape, waiting for me to rush over to join them.

"Jinx we have to go - NOW!" See-more yelled, waving at me to run and retreat.

"No. . ." I whispered to myself as the thought of giving up now began to slowly eat away at me and my pride.

"Jinx!" They called out once more, dodging the attacks of the city's 'heroes' trying to stop them and come at me.

"I'm not going!" I shouted, turning back to the direction of the cell that kept the Russian beast caged in.

"What are you doing!" Gizmo yelled as the others stood unsure of what to do next.

"I'm not letting them win this time! Just keep them busy for now!" I ordered, before rushing further down the prison.

The rumbling and the blasts fired behind me made the entire building shake, and I knew I'd be safe for now. This was my last chance, my moment of glory, and I couldn't waste it on doubts and uncertainty. All would be fixed if I could just carry the plan out without failure. The other's were risking everything for this and it was my job to make sure their efforts weren't in vain. I wouldn't let anyone stop me again and no matter what I would prove our worthiness to the brotherhood of evil at all cost. . .

"You came back?" The Russian woman gazed at me from her cage in shock for a moment.

"I said it before - I don't care who you are. . ." I paused to catch my breath, "But If gaining respect and earning a spot in the big leagues mean's having to save you, then fine."

"Hmm. . ." The woman stepped forward with an evil smirk, "Perhaps you have a lot more to offer den I thought. . ." Her words returned a shed of hope back into my mind and I knew that the moment her freedom was returned the opportunities for us would be restored once again. That's all it took - freedom. A simple hex could easily destroy the cage she was trapped in, regardless of the damage it may have on me. However, the risks were necessary and would almost guarantee us into a world we'd always dreamt of. A place where we could be accepted by those who understood us, and destroy all those who had rejected us in the past.

I raised my head up high and held my hands up in front of her cell doors, signaling her to step back. This was my moment, _mine,_ and I could sense my luck turning around as my fingers began to flicker a bright pink color. I was driven, I was strong, and I knew that this was what I wanted. There was nothing that could have stopped me in that moment. . . nothing but a flash of yellow and red that zipped in front of me before I could even blink.

"Kid flash!" I growled at the speedster blocking me from completing my mission.

"Nice to see you too, beautiful." He said in that flirtatious tone of his while flashing another stupid smile at me.

"Why are you here again!? This isn't your city!" I reminded him, taking on a fighting stance.

"Dat is vhat I vish to know too?" The woman spoke from behind her cell, far more irritated by his presence than I originally was.

"Maybe it's just fate." He winked, teasing me in hopes of distracting me from finishing what I'd come here to do.

"Get out of my way or I'll be forced to blast a hex right through you." I threatened, raising my hands toward the masked hero.

"I can't keep doing this little dance with you forever, jinx." He said, slowly stepping forward, "I've given you dozens of chances before, and now I'm going to give you this last one. Stop all of this and let me help you. . ."

"I don't need your help!" I yelled, praying he would finally understand and give up on the idea of saving this fragile image he had of me. This was who I was, what I wanted to be, and I finally understood that. Now that I've come so far I couldn't turn back or doubt myself anymore. I accepted that and I wouldn't allow him to confuse me any longer.

"Then I can't hold back for you this time. . ." He shrugged, gazing at me with eyes full of disappointment.

"Fine. Neither will I. . ." I whispered and quickly aimed a strong hex his way before he dodged it and disappeared in front of me. I stepped back to search for the redhead who managed to hide from me. I kept my guard up and remained aware in order to fight against the masked hero, but not even that could save me from his surprise attacks as he zipped past me and shoved me into a wall.

"C'mon slowpoke, you're gonna have to think fast if you wanna keep up!" He laughed, running around me in circles as I attempted to send hex after hex in every direction in hopes of stopping him from interfering any longer.

"Why can't you just stay out of my way!" I yelled, bringing him to finally stop for a moment to answer.

"If I did that then it wouldn't be any - oof!" He fell hard on the ground after giving me the chance to send a swirling hex at him.

"You really shouldn't waste so much time talking." I smiled triumphantly before using the chance to return to my plan of freeing the woman still held up behind bars. I couldn't allow anymore time to be wasted and I immediately brought my hands up to break the doors down in order to complete the mission. I was only seconds away from succeeding when I felt a sudden force knock me off my feet and onto the ground.

"What the hell. . ." I groaned, laying on the floor and catching a glance at the woman who looked at me with stern eyes.

"How pathetic." She muttered from in her cage as I attempted to get back up, only to be brought back down by the hands of the hero who played a big part in my misfortune for months.

"Nice try - but you still lose." He grinned, pinning me down on the floor with all his strength to stop me from escaping.

"Let go of me!" I demanded, struggling to break his hold on me and aiming hexes at him that only failed and crashed into the ceiling.

"Of course your highness." He joked and immediately tightened his grip on me just to fuel my rage.

"So then what's your plan, huh? Give me away to the titans? Keep me locked up? You think that'll stop me?" I laughed, hiding the fear slowly creeping in the pit of my stomach.

"Not sure yet, but there is one thing I have to be sure about. . ." He stared down at me for a moment before his eyes began to wander down on my chest. He brought my arms up and held them down with one hand, his eyes staying where they were before he placed a hand on my neck.

 _"Don't worry, Rosie. We're just going to play a little game, that's all."_

 _"Be a good girl. . ."_

"Don't touch me!" I screamed, struggling to break free as the memories of those horrifying night's came rushing back to me. The painful numbness that had played a big part in my childhood which quickly robbed me of my innocence. All of it had been triggered by the redhead's strange actions and I couldn't do anything but panic as I began to relive those painful moments as a child. What were his intentions? What was he planning? Not knowing and being kept in the dark was what really drove me mad and allowed my fear to swallow all sanity I carried in that moment. . .

"I knew it." He finally spoke up, shattering the memories flooding my mind and forcing me back to the reality of my current situation with him holding and gazing down at the pendant I wore around my neck.

"What are you doing?" I tried to keep my voice steady, masking my true fear.

"M.W. . . " He read from the back of the pendant, "You styled it as a choker so I wouldn't suspect a thing. That was smart." He laughed quietly to himself, speaking with words I couldn't understand.

"What are you even talking ab-" I was silenced by a loud beeping noise that had us both confused. We looked around the prison as the beeping suddenly shut off and the sound of rolling doors sliding across the floor echoed in the building. The moment we viewed the caged criminals rushing out of their cells we knew what had occurred and who had possibly done it.

"Gizmo." I grinned as the prisoners escaped their cages and headed for the front of the building, where their ticket to freedom had been waiting.

"What in the - ow!" The redhead cried, dropping to the floor after kneeing him in the groin and pushing him off of me. I quickly brought myself back up from off the floor and watched as the masked hero rolled around on the floor in pain, bringing a small smile to my face at watching his ridiculous behavior.

"Good Verk." The Russian woman smiled, placing a hand on my shoulder.

"Madam Rogue!" I said excitedly, "As you can see me and my team have plenty to offer-"

"Calm down child." She said before heading for the front of the building, "I von't forget vhat happened today. Vee vill be in touch." She waved and rushed out with the other - now wanted - criminals.

"Jinx!" A familiar voice came from the crowd, and it didn't take long to spot my team mates racing toward me.

"See-more!" I waved, ready to run to his side before I felt a sudden force pulling me back by my leg.

"You can't go. . ." Kid flash whispered, slowly pushing himself from off the floor as I shook him off to join the others.

"We gotta get outta here!" Billy panicked, rushing over to me after See-more reached for my hand.

"What happened? Where are the titans?" I asked, glancing at each of their worried expressions.

"They've got their hands full at the moment, trying to stop the prisoners from breaking out - but we better get out now before they find time to come after us." See-more explained and I nodded as we all turned to Kyd Wykkyd for an escape plan.

"You guy's forgetting about me?" Kid flash stood up, ready to take each of us on until he noticed the dark portal created by our red eyed teammate who only smiled as the others began jumping through to escape.

"C'mon jinx!" See-more pulled me, ready to jump through until we stopped after hearing something unexpected from the redheads mouth. . .

"Rose wait!" My body froze instantly after hearing kid flash call out to me by my given name. The name no one from this world ever knew me by, and it took me a moment to process and register what I had just heard before turning to the masked teen behind me.

"W-What did you. . ."

"So I was right?" He smiled widely, taking a step forward while I took a step back.

"Who are you?" I demanded to know, standing my ground and doing my best to hide my fear from the stranger somehow connected to my other half.

"What? You don't recognize me?"

"Cut the crap and answer her!" See-more said sternly, glaring at the boy who now posed a bigger threat to my life and the one I'd been trying to keep hidden.

"An old friend. Or better yet, the original owner of that necklace - even though it was my mother's." His words echoed in my head as he stood happily in front of me as if all our problems had been solved. The things he had said and done moments ago suddenly made sense now, and I laughed at not being able to figure it out sooner. The red hair, the deep blue eyes, the sound of his laughter. . . how could I not see it?

"Rudolph. . .?" I mumbled his name, as if to figure out if any of this were true.

"You mean he's the guy from. . .?" See-more looked at me then back to the hero who now shared part of our history.

"Kid flash!" Robin's voiced pierced our ears as he came rushing to the rescue. The moment we spotted him I was forcefully pushed into the portal created moments ago along with the others. Then, in an instant, we were gone. _He_ was gone.

Nothing made sense to me anymore. There were too many things that had occurred in such a short amount of time and I could feel my past catching up to me. How long would it be before it finally captured me? How long would it take before our secret was out? Would I be able to keep my promise to her? There was just so much rushing through my mind during my time in the darkness. It wasn't until we appeared in the living room of our home that my true senses came back. This was who I was, this was what I had chosen to become. I wasn't going to let anyone destroy everything I had worked hard to built. No matter what I was going to keep my promise and stick with the decisions I had made - and no one was going to stop me. Not the titan's, the bullies, the Russian beast, Linda - no one.

 **And especially not _him_.**


	19. Chapter 18: UnForgiven

Chapter 18: UnForgiven

Kid Flash

 _The wind blew heavily outside and sent the snow crashing silently against my window. My parents sat quietly in the front seats of the car, trying their best not to argue during the heavy storm. They were good people, great parents, and were part of a loving family. . . that's what I always wanted to say. But, facts were, that they were nothing like how I hoped they'd always be as a kid. They weren't role-models, heroes, or admirable in any way. They were part of every child's nightmare with their constant bickering and endless beatings. Still, I had high hopes that it would one day change and get better. But it never changed._

They _never changed._

 _"We're going the wrong way." My mother whined, leaning her head against her window._

 _"I know exactly where we're going." My father said, keeping his eyes straight ahead to not lose sight of the road almost completely covered by a blanket of snow._

 _"You don't even know where we are?" She groaned, turning to my father with an irritated look on her face._

 _"Don't you start with me, Mary!" He yelled, trying his best to not lose focus on what was going on in front of him._

 _"I'm not starting anything! You're the one who's gotten us lost!" She screamed, turning her body towards me, "This is the kind of man you're father is, Rudolph. A good for nothing-"_

 _"Shut up!" My father shouted, reaching for my mother and yanking her back by her hair, "Don't you fill his head with that crap!"_

 _"Let go of me!" She ordered while roughly pushing him away._

 _"You stupid bitch!" His attention now fixed on my mother, "You're always doing this to us! Why can't you ever learn!"_

 _"It isn't my fault I'm stuck having to deal with an idiotic husband like-" She was silenced by my father's fist. The swelling in her cheek soon to appear after she began to weep - but he didn't stop there. He pulled her closer to him as he tried steering with one hand and slapping her with the other._

 _"Why do you do this to us! Why don't you understand that-"_

 _"DAD!" I screamed at the truck moving fast toward us. It didn't take long for my father to steer away from the other vehicle that brought our own to spiral out of control. He tried his best to keep us safe on the road, but nothing worked, and before he knew it he had lost all control of the vehicle._

 _The moments that passed went by faster than the blink of an eye. The fearful expressions, the world swirling in white, and then sliding down a steep hill before colliding into a large tree. After it was over there weren't any sounds other than my breathing and the wind blowing through shattered windows. It didn't take long for me to step out of my father's car in search for help._

 _My body ached all over and was in need of medical assistance, but no one heard my cries. And so, I did what any child would do in that situation, I ran to my parents for guidance. Expecting they'd have an answer to fix the situation. And when I opened their door I felt that everything would be resolved shortly, but instead my eyes were shown nothing but bodies covered in glass and blood. They made no sound or movement and would not respond to my cries. No matter how many times I begged them to return to me, they never did. They were here one minute, arguing like fools, and then, in an instant. . ._

 _They were gone._

"Mister West!"

"PRESENT!" I yelled at the familiar voice that had woken me from another reoccurring nightmare, only to find myself alone in class with my Bio Teacher in front of me.

"Did you two enjoy napping during my lesson?"

"I wasn't really napping," I tried to laugh, "I was just-wait, did you say two. . .?" I then turned to the seat next to me to find my lab partner still sleeping soundly at her desk. Miss know-it-all didn't seem to even care about jeopardizing her grade at all as she refused to wake up despite our calls.

"Stupid, wake up. . ." I whispered, elbowing her arm repeatedly until she finally began to move.

"Mm?" She groaned, peeking up at us before catching Fisher's eyes on her. She then quickly shot up in her seat and laughed it off after she had finally become aware of our situation, "Mister Fisher, I was-"

"Disrespecting my authority?" He glared at her, making the situation far more awkward.

"C'mon Fisher dude it's not like we were disrupting your lesson or anything." I shrugged, leaning back against my chair.

"No, you were just ignoring it." He said while shaking his head at the girl next to me.

"I apologize, sir. It won't happen again." She told the man who stared at her with disappointed eyes.

"It better not." He warned, "Now, where are your tutor trackers?" He asked, placing his hand out for us to turn in the sheets of papers we weren't able to fully complete.

"About that, sir. . ." The adam's girl started, taking out the paper from in her folder while I reached into my school bag to hand it over.

"We only got it signed once." I told the man who now looked even angrier than before.

"Do you take this class as a joke? You do realize that I could easily fail-"

"It was my fault, sir." The girl cut in, "There were a few problems going on at home and I wasn't able to make time to stay after school. . ." She said with her head bent down as if she had committed some terrible crime.

"No, I also had some stuff going on that made it impossible to fit in with her schedule." I admitted, sinking into my chair as the man stood silently watching us for a few moments.

"Well seeing how dreadfully exhausted the two of you appear at the moment, I'll let this one slide - but if either of you fail the upcoming test then I'll have no choice but to fail you for the semester."

"You can't be serious-"

"But I am." He turned to me, "So I suggest you spend less time with your friends and more time studying. That also means not going overboard at the dance this Saturday and getting home early to focus on passing your-"

"The homecoming dance is this Saturday?" I asked, baffled by how much time had passed over the past few weeks of school. The workload, hero-duties, and jinx drama had stolen _all_ of my time on campus - time I wouldn't be able to get back. If I couldn't even enjoy my youth here there'd be no point in even coming to school at all, which was suppose to be my vacation away from the craziness that was my life.

"Like I just said Mister West, if you plan on passing this class I suggest you not lose any more valuable time by getting caught up at such events." He lectured before returning back to the front of the room and sitting back in his chair, "You two are free to leave." He dismissed.

We grabbed our things and left the room silently without another word. The halls were practically empty with everyone already headed to their second period class while we treaded down the halls. The adam's girl looked nearly dead with dark bags highlighted under her eyes and her hair in a frizz after laying for an hour on her desk napping away.

"You look like crap." I commented on the girl who scoffed at my response.

"You're one to talk." She rolled her eyes and increased her pace.

"What's got you so tired out anyway?" I asked, curious to understand why someone of her kind would risk pulling a stunt like _that_ in class.

"I just had a lot of stuff going on at home." She shrugged, clearly hiding something that I knew she'd never bother sharing.

"Uh huh."

"What about you?" She asked.

"I met up with an old friend of mine late last night." I explained as the image of jinx suddenly flashed through my mind and sent a smile forming on my face. The girl I'd been searching for, the one I'd assumed had been dead for years, was living some-what safely a few cities away. That gave me such a great sense of relief, but knowing the situation she had been enduring over the years is what hung heavily over my shoulders. . .

"Well hopefully you've got all that late night partying out of your system." She lectured, stopping by her locker to grab a few things before heading to class.

"We weren't partying, it was more of a quick reunion." I added. "But you're right I'll try not to waste as much time as before." I promised, gazing at the girl who looked at me again with that blank expression on her face.

"Whatever then." She finished before placing a few books away.

"Listen, about the other day at the mall. I didn't meant to make it seem like-"

"West," She stopped me from saying anymore, "Let's just focus on passing Bio, okay? We're not friends and we don't need to be." She said before slamming her locker door and heading back down the hall.

"Why not?" I asked after rushing over to her side.

"Why not, what?"

"Why can't we be friends?" I rephrased, running in front of her to keep her from leaving.

"You're seriously asking that?" She laughed sarcastically, trying to move past me as I continued blocking her every step.

"What's that suppose to mean?" I asked the girl who grew quickly irritated at my attempts of making her late to class.

"Sorry if I'm not interested in being friends with someone who's only planning on using me for homework and test answers." She finished and tried pushing me to the side in order to pass by.

"Look," I started, grabbing her wrist and keeping her from walking away, "I get why you might assume all of that but- "

"Assume?" She interrupted, laughing to herself before I continued.

" _But_ I wasn't trying to come across that way, okay? I honestly don't think you're all that bad to hang out with and I'm not just saying that because I'm secretly hoping you'll do all my classwork. If that's what I was after I wouldn't need to be saying any of this in the first place." I told her as she gazed up at me with a different look in her eyes. She studied me carefully, almost hoping to catch me in some sort of lie, and after gazing into her eyes for a short period of time I felt a strange sense of familiarity wash over me again. Even though it was impossible, and didn't make any sense, she reminded me so much of the vicious cat eyed girl miles away from here. Despite the fact that this rose and the one who was now known as jinx were two completely different people, something kept whispering in the back of my head that made it seem almost plausible. But there was absolutely no way it could be her. . .

Could it?

"Whatever. . ." She shrugged, clearing her throat and yanking her arm back, "We should probably get to class now or risk getting lectured all over again." She suggested, avoiding my eyes and staring directly at the ground.

"Yeah, you're probably right." I nodded, taking a few steps down the hall before she reached for my arm.

"Wait, West," She called, "I've been meaning to ask you something for a while now. . ." She said hesitantly, her words making my heart sink by the sudden change in the atmosphere.

"What is it?"

"It's just that. . ." She hesitated once again as her eyes slowly met up with mine and brought my heart racing faster than before.

"Yeah?"

"Well. . ." She began after releasing her grip on my arm, "Where did Gary get the answers to our Algebra homework?"

"What?" I looked at her after feeling a strange sense of disappointment.

"I didn't do his homework, but he seems to think I did after giving it to you? Even though you never saw my work. . ."

"Oh-" My eyes grew wide as I tried masking my panic by laughing, "Are you sure you didn't show it to me before?" I tried confusing the girl who only stood there with her arms folded over her chest.

"Positive." She said in suspicion to my obviously strange behavior.

"Then I probably got it from one of the other dweebs before I gave it to him." I lied, trying to escape by taking smalls steps away from the girl who studied me carefully through her lenses.

"Oh really? But we went to the mall right after leaving the library, and I never saw you ask any of the 'dweebs' for the work beforehand."

"Yeah, well, ugh-"

"Is there something you're trying to hide?" She stepped closer, watching me sweat under the pressure as I tried to think up any kind of lie that would save me from exposing myself.

"W-What would I need to hide?"

"I don't know. Maybe something like the fact that you might actually be some huge closet nerd." She smirked, seeing right through me once again.

"That's not-"

"You can't fool me West." She said, waiting for me to break until I finally gave up to avoid anymore of her questions.

"Please don't tell anyone." I begged desperately, letting out a sigh of a defeat and expecting her to wrap me up in some sort of black mail plan to keep my secret hidden, but instead she simply. . .

"Okay." And continued walking.

"Wait what?" I grabbed her arm and pulled her back only to have her smack me across the head with her book.

"Stop holding onto me all the time." She ordered after yanking her arm back.

"Okay, first - ow! And second, you seriously aren't going to tell anyone? At all?" I asked while gently rubbing the back of my head.

"Why would I? It's obvious you don't want anyone to know how smart you actually are or risk ruining your 'reputation'." She shrugged while sliding the book back into her bag.

"Not that I don't appreciate that but normally people would use this kind of info to their advantage and you're just going to pretend like you never knew?" I squinted, suspicious of the girl who clearly hated my guts but was now willing to help keep my secret safe.

"I have no interest in ruining your social life at this school. I just want to pass my classes and graduate like everyone else, so try not to get in the way of that by dragging me down if you fail that test." She threatened, her eyes piercing my soul.

"You should have more faith in me."

"How can anyone have faith with that idiotic brain of yours." She said bluntly, "Just try to make more time to study, especially since you probably wont have a lot of it with homecoming just around the corner."

"I got it, okay?" I groaned, waving her off.

"I'm serious, West."

"I know." I said, sliding over to her side, "So you going to the dance with anyone?" I asked in my effort of trying to change the subject.

"Nope." She stated before we went back to walking to class.

"Oh. . .?" I said awkwardly, "Well if you're not going with anyone, maybe we could-"

"Rose!" Another voice echoed from down the hall.

"Linda?" We both watched the dark haired girl who came rushing over to us and stopped me from making the biggest mistake of the year. What was I thinking? The thought of even considering the idea of taking the lamest chick at this school to a social event made me cringe. There couldn't be anything more between us than what we already had going because at the end of the day she was right. The school had already built a certain image for me to carry out and I wasn't going to let a four eyed weirdo ruin all of that. . .

"What do you want?" The adam's girl asked uncomfortably.

"Can we please talk?" Linda strangely begged, bringing me to wonder what sort of relationship the two had going on.

"I told you to stay away from-"

"Wally!" We all flinched at the high pitched call that belonged to the school's biggest diva.

"Stacy!" I tried to say cheerfully, forcing a smile on my face as she came over to join in on our conversation.

"What's going on here?"

"Not much." I said casually.

"I remember you two." Stacy pointed at the two girls beside me, "Are you guys friends?" She asked, only to receive a different response from each of them.

"Well kind of-"

"I have no connection to this girl at all." Rose said monotonously, as Linda stepped away with a saddened expression.

"I see. . ." Stacy nodded before returning back to me, "So, Wally, you going to the dance with anyone? Because I was hoping the two of us could maybe-"

"Sorry, Stace! I already have a date." I lied, stepping away from the fueling anger that rose in the blondes eyes.

"What!? Who!?"

"Who?" I panicked, trying to think of the least annoying person to take before my eyes fell on the dark haired girl standing by Rose, "I'm going with Linda." I smiled.

"Linda!?" Stacy growled, shooting death glares at the girl who stood confused by the situation.

"She already agreed to go with me this morning." I explained, pushing past Rose and wrapping an arm around Linda to convince the obsessed stalker standing in front of us to leave me alone.

"Is this true?" She turned to Linda.

"Um. . . yes?" She nodded, uncertain at first, but it was enough to convince the blonde to give up for the time being.

"I see. . ." She exhaled deeply, trying to keep calm after accepting the situation and turning away to head back to class without another word.

"What was that?" Linda eyed me suspiciously.

"I'm sorry, I just really needed a way out of that mess." I told her, letting out a sigh of relief while leaning against the lockers next to us.

"So then we're not going together?" She looked at me, lost and confused by the situation she was thrown in moments ago.

"Well, if you want to I wouldn't mind." I shrugged, flashing a smile at her which brought her face to flush a bright pink color.

"Sounds like a plan." She said smiling before the bell rang to signal the start of second period.

"Aw man we're all going to be late-" I stopped to search for the Adam's girl who was nowhere to be found, and it was clear that she had left a long time ago.

"I guess Rose already went to class first. I should probably leave too." Linda said before rushing down the hall in search for her second period door. I slid down against the locker until I reached the floor, thinking back on yesterday's events and planning my next move. If I spoke to jinx now, how would she react? Would she hate me? How was I suppose to face her after that? She didn't seem to want to have anything to do with me at all after running off with her one eyed friend, but if I gave up now and did nothing things would probably get even worse, right?

 _". . .it's stupid watching you trying to please everyone who's already trying to please you. If you were all just honest with each other things wouldn't be as complicated."_

I knew she was right, but I didn't have the power to change anything. I spent my youth blaming myself for jinx's disappearance and my parent's death. I let them down miserably and I wasn't going to do that all over again with everyone around me. Still, I knew she was right. If it wasn't Jinx on my mind then it was that freaky Adam's girl with her annoyingly powerful wisdom. Maybe it was wrong of me to not listen to her advice, but I couldn't risk hurting more people by speaking out. That wasn't even my main issue at the moment, the real problem was trying to find jinx. If I could see her again and was able to speak to her on a personal level then I could finally make up for what I couldn't do as a child - I could save her! But would she even give me a chance? Could she trust me enough to let me in? Or was it more than just trust? Maybe the real reason she left the other night wasn't because she was scared or didn't believe me. Maybe it was the fact that I had broken my promise to her, and that's why. . .

 _She couldn't forgive me. . ._


	20. Chapter 19: Can't Let You Go

Chapter 19: Can't Let You Go

Jinx

We all stood gathered around the large computer in the living room with the image of the Russian Beast on the screen. All of our hard work had finally paid off as we stood to face the woman we had just rescued days before. This was what we had trained for, what we desired the most. It was my idea to join their organization in the first place and I was proud of how far we had come along. Yet, it didn't feel as amazing as I had hoped. We were here because of me, we fought to protect this family, this was what we wanted so. . .

Why didn't it feel that way?

"Vee vill let you know of our decision soon, but I feel dat you have each proven yourselves vorthy to zee bruzzerhood." The woman smiled before signing off and letting the screen fall back into black. The other's ran around the living room in cheers, high fiving one another while stomping around victoriously.

"I told you we'd win!" Billy yelled, jumping on the couch like an idiot as gizmo and mammoth ran to join.

"And those crud-munchin' titan's couldn't even stop us!" Gizmo laughed, bringing the others to roar triumphantly at our success. It amused me to watch them jump around the building excitedly for something we had work hard to finally reach, something we had accomplished together as a team - a family. And even though there were a lot of mixed emotions going on through my head there was one thing I was certain about, and it was _this_. What we had here meant more to me than any priceless jewel or artifact. But of course,

They already knew that. . .

"Would you all shut up already!" I yelled as each of them automatically froze where they stood, "It's already late, let's just go to bed." I ordered, pointing at the empty hallway for them to follow.

"C'mon we should celebrate. . ." Mammoth whined.

"Celebrate what? We haven't even made it in yet!" I shouted, bringing the room to fall into silence as they trudged down the halls and into their rooms with their heads down the entire time.

"Hey jinx?" See-more tapped my shoulder.

"What now?" I groaned, rubbing my temple in hopes of decreasing the damage of my aching head.

"Can we talk for a sec?" He suddenly asked.

"About?" I asked before falling onto the couch in the center of the room.

"Kid Flash."

There it was. The topic I'd been avoiding to discuss with any of the members since the prison break. Even hearing his name filled me with rage as it echoed around in my brain. How could I not see it? How could he run around pretending like we'd never met this entire time? Just the thought of him drove me insane, but what was worst was the very fact that I'd wasted all these years worrying about the boy in the attic, and this entire time he'd been doing nothing but trying to get us locked up. I should have realized it before, he was always a nosey kid, but to think that he'd been toying with us all this time. We -or better yet I- was nothing but a fool to think for a moment he actually cared during our little run-ins. The truth was he never did and all this time we had been nothing more . . .

But a joke to him.

"Why waste our breaths talking about a guy like him?"

"So then it is true. He's the guy from-"

"See-more please!" I whispered frantically, "I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"Why not? Why avoid the topic?" He stared.

"I'm not avoiding anything." I shrugged, pushing myself off the couch, "Are we done here?"

"You can lie all you want Rose, but you can't fool me." He stated before reaching for my arm, "Be honest, you're still in love with the dude aren't you?"

"What!?" I shouted, pushing him away to break from his grip, "Don't be ridiculous!"

" _I'm_ being ridiculous? You're the one who's been wearing his necklace all these years!"

"The only reason I wear the stupid thing is because-"

"Because of terra, _right_?" He scoffed, "Is Terra also the reason you kept his roses?"

"That wasn't. . ." I was at a loss for words, and I knew no matter what I said after that would only irritate him more - but he was wrong. It wasn't that I loved that idiot, there was no way I could. He hadn't done anything to help me and wrecked every opportunity that came my way. How could I possibly love someone like that? It didn't make any sense.

"That's what I thought." He said nonchalantly before turning away, "I always figured it'd be him. I mean, at least he made an effort to save you that night we were taken. Unlike me who just -"

"Would you shut up already!" I screamed.

"No!" He retaliated, "I'm not going to stand here and watch it anymore! If he's the one you really want then go to him and quit screwing with this team! I'm tired of seeing you doubt which side you want to stand by so just -" His words fell silent after my quick movement as I ran to him and embraced him from behind. If he had said anymore then I knew by the tone in his voice that we'd both burst into tears.

I could sense the hurt he carried at the idea of me loving someone other than him after all his efforts to protect me and gain my trust since we formed this family. But I also knew the real reason was more than petty jealousy of losing my heart, but rather, losing what we had created here. This family, this team, our friendship was all we had and if those thoughts ever changed then it would all shatter in an instant. Those doubts would ruin us and that was the last thing we needed. . .

 _"Just promise me that no matter what happens we'll all do whatever it takes to keep this family together. . . because I don't want to ever be separated from any of you guys."_

"We made a promise remember. . .?" I whispered before he pulled away to turn back and face me again, "We pinky swore." I laughed, innocently holding up my pinky to break the tension.

"Jinx -"

"I choose you!" I shouted, catching him off guard as he looked at me with wide eyes.

"What?" He asked warily.

"I said I choose you, okay?" I told the boy who looked at me with doubtful eyes, "I don't care about Kid flash or the other side. All that matters to me is this team! And if I have to choose who to love more between you two than the choice is obvious. . ." I confessed softly before leaning in and crashing my lips against his. He'd been right all along, it was selfish of me to continue on like this without taking his feelings under consideration. This was what was best for me and the team, and as he pulled me closer by wrapping his arms around my waist I knew there was no escaping this fate. Years I had tried and failed, but whether or not I felt as strongly as he did I couldn't ignore his desires any longer. This was the only way to keep us all together and I decided long ago that I'd do whatever it takes to do just that.

The kiss came to an abrupt end after he pushed me away firmly, "What about Kid Flash?"

"Kid flash. . ." I laughed, masking the anger I held at speaking his name out loud, "He's nothing more but a pest that stands in our way of reaching a greater power and he knows it."

"And that greater power is suppose to be what? The brotherhood of evil?" He sneered.

"Enough about all this. . ." I forced a yawn, "I'm going to bed." I said, patting his shoulder before moving past him and making my way down the hall. After ending the conversation I rushed into my room and shut the door behind me.

There were a thousand thoughts rushing through my head and it began eating away at me as I stood in the darkness of my domain. I reached for the pillow placed neatly on my bed and brought it up to my face when the screams came bursting out along with my tears. Everything I did, everything I decided, was all based on protecting those I cared for - and yet lately it felt like that involved needing to lie in order to get ahead. It was piling up bit by bit and it made it difficult for me to tell what was real anymore. Why couldn't I love Seymour? Why did Rudolph suddenly return? And why couldn't anything go the way I planned? Everything I did felt wrong every second of every day and I was almost certain that the universe was plotting something against me. . .

My eyes eventually fell to the mirror in the corner as I raised my head back up and tossed the pillow to the side of the bed. There staring back at me was a girl I hardly recognized anymore. She watched me with her tear stained face and her messy pink hair until I caught sight of the purple pendant around her neck. I placed my hand over the necklace I'd received years before as every memory stored in my brain from before came rushing back to me. The abandonment, the torture and torment - all of it. There were countless reasons as to why I had become the creature I am today. The vicious monster that spent her evenings stealing and destroying everything that existed in this city. It was clear as to why and who had morphed me into this beast, but what bothered me wasn't how I had turned out this way but more as to why I chose to continue on like this. . .

 _"As long as you where this you'll always be safe. And as long as you keep it, I'll always be sure to keep my promise. That way you wont have to cry anymore."_

Those words had remained with me since our first meeting due to my wishful thinking as a child. However, he couldn't protect me - no one could. I was responsible for myself and myself alone. I couldn't rely on just anyone to pick me back up from off the ground. Especially not Kid Flash. Yet, even though his words were carved in the back of my mind and the pendant I held burned in my palm, I couldn't throw him away so easily. Despite all my efforts I couldn't even toss the pendant that no longer held any real meaning because of the memories it carried of _him_. The way his smile warmed my heart in that cold room and the way his words gave me such great hopes were what made it impossible to forget even for a second. He was like the sun that faded and his kindness was enchanting to a child like myself at the time who had never experienced such a thing through the torture of the woman who ran that house. There wasn't a good enough reason to justify my actions and I was very well aware of that, but I guess part of me couldn't let go of the boy in the attic because. . .

 **Part of me never _wanted_ to forget.**


	21. Chapter 20: The Missing Piece

Chapter 20: The Missing Piece

Kid Flash

 _I stood in the darkness, blind to all, while trudging through an empty world where no one else appeared to exist but I. My mind yearning for the light that would not show as everything remained still and silent. Nothing could be heard but the sound of my own heartbeat, and as the darkness engulfed me numerous emotions began to flood my mind. I felt lost, confused, and alone. ._ _._

 _Just like I did that night._

 _"Rudolph." A quiet voice whispered softly. There she stood, underneath a small shed of light, trapped behind a glass wall where I could not reach her. A little girl dressed in white who had remained trapped in the back of my mind._

 _"Rose. . ." I tried calling to the child I had betrayed, taking one step forward only to have her take another step back._

 _"How could you?" She hiccupped, "How could you forget about me?"_

 _"I didn't-"_

 _"Yes you did!" She glared at me, eyes shimmering as her tears began to surface, "You gave up on me and now look what I've become!" She stepped further away, fading into the darkness as I rushed over to reach for her._

 _"I never meant to! I wanted to save you but -"_

 _"But you failed." Her words echoed as my hand's fell hard on the glass wall that separated our two worlds._

 _"N-No! I can still -"_

 _"It's too late now." She said sorrowfully before stepping forward and revealing the image she had created as the hive five's villainous leader._

 _"Jinx, please!" I pleaded, "Let me help you! I can protect you!"_

 _"I don't need your protection anymore. . ." She hissed, turning away as I fell to my knees in desperation._

 _"Please, let me save you this time!" I cried, banging on the wall that forbid us to ever touch._

 _"Wally, stop!" A stranger cried out from behind. My eyes shot up in search for the familiar voice that came through, and the moment I spotted the figure standing behind me my mind was able to instantly recognize the girl searching for me._

 _"Linda?"_

 _"You can't trust her!" Linda screamed, "She's lying to you!"_

 _"What?" I asked warily, confused by the girl's accusations as I pushed myself from off the floor._

 _"Stay away from her!" Linda warned before the darkness began slowly swallowing her whole._

 _"What do you mean-"_

 _"West. . .?" A new voice called to me, and by instinct I immediately turned to face the girl that now stood in jinx's place._

 _"Adams. . ." I felt my blood run cold as I stood to face the Rose that replaced the one I once knew. She watched me for a long moment, puzzled by everything as I tried to slowly step away from her. Why was she here? How could she be here? When did Adam's get involved in any of this? None of it made any sense. Every mystery solved just led to another and no matter what I did it kept continuing on that way like a never ending puzzle. I couldn't solve this without all of the pieces together even if I tried. . ._

 _So what was I missing?_

"Wally!" A familiar voice woke me along with a swift kick to the knee as I shot up at my seat.

"Ow!" I cried out, looking around the area to find myself sitting alone at a table in the library with a certain black haired beauty hovering above me, " Linda?What are you doing here?" I asked before stretching in my chair and yawning while searching for a certain four-eyed dweeb I had planned to meet.

"I could ask you the same thing? Why are you in the library alone during after school hours?" She asked, furrowing her brow.

"Me?" I panicked, finally realizing the situation I had woken up to as my mind tried to conjure up any lie that wouldn't risk damaging my reputation on campus, "Oh, you know. I was just. . .uh. . ."

"Meeting up with Rose again?"

"What?" I tried to laugh, ignoring the sharp pain in my chest at hearing that name spoke out loud, "Why would I -"

"Wally I already know." She smiled cheekily.

"You do?" I asked cautiously, waiting to hear what she already knew or assumed.

"I've seen you guy's studying here before." She said as I exhaled deeply in relief.

"If you could not tell anyone about it I'd really appreciate it."

"No problem, I get it, " She nodded, "But if it's Rose you're expecting to see then you should probably go and get her."

"What do you mean?" I asked, confused by her statement.

"I saw her in the art room a few minutes ago and she didn't seem like she was going anywhere any time soon."

"The art room?" I echoed and began packing up my stuff before getting out of my seat.

"So you guy's must be really close, right?" She suddenly asked as I reached for my school bag.

"Not really, " I shrugged, "I'll talk to you later." I said, patting her shoulder before rushing out of the room. The thought of even looking at her for another second sent chills down my spine whenever I thought back to that dream, or better yet - nightmare. I knew it probably didn't mean much and it might have all been in my head, but I couldn't shake off the feeling it gave. It almost felt like it held some greater meaning to it. As if the universe was trying to tell me something but. . . that didn't make any sense. I tried ignoring all the ridiculous questions and theories popping up in my head and focused on finding the dweeb that had me waiting this entire time. After all her lectures and threats she had been the one to bail in the end, and _that_ irritated me greatly.

The halls were nearly empty with only janitors and teachers occasionally passing by to finish up their own work. I spent a few minutes roaming around on my own in search for the girl but it didn't take long for me to find the door to the art room that happened to be left wide open for anyone to enter. I was ready to barge right in there and tell her off, scold her for ditching like she had done to me in the past, that was what I had planned until. . .

I actually saw her.

She sat alone, gazing in front of a colored canvas, peacefully thinking to herself. The sun's light seeping through the window landed gracefully over her as she continued working on her piece, never noticing my presence as I stood watching her there carefully. Her mind seemed to have floated elsewhere as she put all her energy and concentration in her art, eyes shimmering joyously as a smile began to slowly form on her lips. A smile so genuine that one couldn't help but to smile in her presence. It was amusing to watch her there looking almost radiant, stunning, and even. . .

 _Beautiful._

"Knock, Knock." I tapped the door, making her jump slightly after breaking her concentration.

"West?" She stared, placing her paint brush down, "What are you doing here?"

"That's my line." I said while moving over to her side, "We're suppose to be in the library, remember?"

"I don't remember us making plans for today?"

"Yeah but. . ." I knew I couldn't say any more because she had already won the conversation. Just like every other time she was right. It was only me who had assumed we'd meet without telling her anything, which meant I had no right to lecture her about it.

"We can still make time if you want?" She shrugged and began cleaning up her area, "I wasn't planning on heading home just yet anyway."

"Well if that's okay with you then. . ." The room fell silent for a moment after casually peeking at the art piece she had been so focused on moments ago. There, stood an image of roses painted elegantly in various soft colors. They were piled together nicely and protected over large thorns growing from underneath them. It gave me chills yet it was like nothing I'd ever seen a student paint on campus before. It had a different and unique feel to it that captivated me in a strange way. . .

It was breathtaking.

"What are you doing?" She asked sourly before taking the canvas down.

"You did that?" I asked, still in awe at the image burned into my head.

"Maybe. Why? You have something stupid to say about it?" She glared at me.

"No, I think it's pretty amazing actually."

"Yeah, _right_." She growled, refusing to believe my words as she placed the painted canvas against the wall.

"No, I'm serious." I said insistently, "It's really good!" I smiled at her, making her stop to stare at me for a few moments in disbelief.

"Whatever." She shrugged before she began packing up her things.

"Okay, I just gave you a compliment and you're still giving me an attitude. I'm starting to think you _actually_ hate me."

"Oh, well, I wasn't trying to get you to think that I hate you. . ." She said, looking back at me.

"You weren't?"

"No, I thought I already made it _clear_ that I hate you." She finally admitted before shoving everything into her bag, and despite how I played it I couldn't help but feel slightly hurt by her remark.

"What did I ever do to you that was so bad -" I paused for a moment before the memory of my first meeting with the girl played in my head, "Actually, don't answer that."

"Exactly." She scoffed and quickly grabbed her bag.

"Okay, so I might have been a jerk to you at first." I started, "But I'm apologizing now, so why can't you let it go and move on?"

"Because, West, you're never going to change." She shook her head, "You can be sorry all you want but when tomorrow comes you're still going to be that same jerk who stands alongside every bully at this school, and that's why I don't want to be associated with you at all." She finished and began heading for the exit until I swooped over and pulled her back.

"What do you want me to do? They're my friends I can't just -"

" _Friends?_ " She laughed, "West, friends don't make their friends turn into total dickheads. They're suppose to be like family, and family isn't suppose to bring out the worst in people."

 _"They're not your family jinx! Family doesn't bring out the worst in people and that's all they do to you. . . "_

I stopped and stared at the girl who brought me to face my own hypocrisy. I'd spent all this time trying to lecture jinx about her wrongdoings and here I was being lectured by some dweeb about my own. I knew she was right, she was always right, but I couldn't let her know that. . .

"Look, I'm sorry for what I did and what everyone else has done to piss you off. You don't deserve any of that, but I can't change overnight - none of us can. That's why I'm trying to make things right because I really don't want you hating me. . ."

"Why?" She shrugged, waiting for an answer that even I didn't know just yet. Why did I care so much about this dweeb? Why was she always in my head? And why did it bother me so much to have her hating me?

"I don't know. . ." I sighed deeply and stepped back after releasing her arm.

"West. . ." She paused for a moment, "I understand why you do it. I also understand how difficult it is not wanting to let anyone down, especially those who look up to you. . ."

"You do?"

"Yeah," She nodded before turning her eyes away, "That doesn't justify your actions though."

"Yeah but -"

"Let's just get to studying. We shouldn't be wasting time on pointless arguments when we should be focused on passing that Bio test." She sighed, casually changing the subject.

"Wait," I froze, "You don't think Fisher was actually serious about that whole failing thing, do you?"

"Probably. He doesn't seem like the kind to kid around." She shrugged.

"Great, now I actually have to study for -"

"Rose!" A stranger called out, stepping in through the doorway to catch the Adam girl's attention. I recognized the guy eyeing her in his gym clothes as the captain of the soccer team, and even though we never spoke much he was still well known around campus. Despite only being second runner up to me when it came down to popularity on campus he was still a pretty big threat. . .

"Do I know you?" She asked after receiving a flirtatious smile from the boy that made me cringe at the sight.

"Not yet, but I know you." He said casually, "I'm Shawn Miller." He introduced himself after extending his hand out to her.

"And _I'm_ leaving." She said monotonously before attempting to move past him, making me laugh at her giving someone else the cold shoulder.

"Wait, wait, wait -" He spluttered, blocking her path, "I come in peace." He tried joking with her.

"What do you want?" She asked rather impatiently and giving him a dirty look for his persistent behavior.

"I just want to ask you something?"

"Oh?" She crossed her arms over her chest.

"I've seen you around campus and been watching you for a while now. . ." He paused nervously, "So, I was wondering, if maybe you'd want to go to the dance with -"

"Let me stop you there." She raised a hand to him, "I'm sorry but I can't accept your invitation." She politely declined.

"But you can't do that-" He said indignantly, "Did someone already ask you? or -"

"Dude." I chuckled, going over to the idiot blocking our exit and placing my arm over his shoulder, "Give it up. She's a dweeb she probably has too much homework she needs to finish up to even show up at the dance." I explained, trying to make him feel better and ignoring the anger shooting at me through her eyes.

"Excuse me?" She muttered angrily through her breath.

"You know these nerds. Besides she'd probably just end up being a drag at the dance with that attitude of hers. Do yourself a favor and just - OW!" I was cut off by the sudden pain she gave me after stomping on my foot. I stepped away from them immediately and hopped over to one of the desks to stay off the foot she most likely bruised.

"You know what, _Shawn_?" She said aloud and glanced over at me, "I change my mind. I'd love to go to the dance with you." My heart suddenly dropped at hearing those words as she smiled up at the dude, no, at her _date._

"Really!" He said cheerfully, "That's great! You won't regret it!" He smiled and hugged her tightly, which irritated me even more as he stayed that way for a long moment.

"Yeah okay. . ." She mumbled uncomfortably, pushing the boy away from her before forcing a laugh to break the awkward tension between the two.

"So should I pick you up or -"

"No!" She seemed to panick, "How about we just meet there?"

"Okay?" He laughed, "I'll see you there."

"Okay." She nodded as he patted her shoulder and glanced over at me for a second.

"See you around, West." He grinned, clearly mocking me before leaving the room and disappearing down the hall. I had every reason to hate the guy, especially as my competition on campus, but as much as he irritated me the only one I could be mad at wasn't him. . .

It was _her_.

"What was that?" I asked frustratedly.

"What was what?" She looked back at me.

"Don't play dumb. Why'd you say yes to that guy?"

"Why do you care?" She stepped toward me, "After all I'm just a dweeb with a bad attitude and too much homework on her hand to do anything fun." She shook her head at me and started for the door.

"I didn't mean it like that!" I chased after her, "I only said that stuff to get him to back off. You didn't want to go and I thought I was doing you a favor!"

She stopped and turned back to me, "If you're definition of a favor is _insulting_ me then I don't want any more of your _favors_!"

"I wasn't -"

"Just back off, West!" She yelled, "You don't need to worry about my business. So just stay out of it!" She finished before heading toward the direction of the library.

"Fine! Do whatever you want then!" I screamed and watched her go on first until she was no longer in sight. After losing my temper I kicked the locker door behind me and leaned against the wall to cool down, waiting for my anger to subside before seeing her again.

She had ticked me off more than anyone I had ever encountered - and I've come across some pretty irritating people. I don't know what it was about her but she knew exactly what to say to make me mad and I _hated_ that about her. She was rude, short-tempered, moody, depressing, and frustrating to be around. What was worse was that I couldn't understand a thing that went on in that head of hers and _that_ was what ticked me off even more. But what really infuriated me, and made it _so_ difficult, was not knowing _why?_ _Why_ was it she could make me angrier than anyone I'd ever met so quickly? Why wasn't she as obedient as the other girls? Why wouldn't she ever listen to me? There were so many _'why's'_ with her that should have made me want to steer clear of her a long time ago. Yet, even though she annoyed me this much, and irritated me _big time_. . .

 **I couldn't help but be drawn back.**


	22. Chapter 21: Change

Chapter 21: Change

Jinx

We sat at an empty table reviewing our notes as the hour drew close to an end. The library was practically empty with the librarian appearing to be the only one else in the room with us now. This was what I needed - a distraction. It had been a while since I'd put all my energy into studying like this. Even though it meant having to deal with an irritating pest like _Wally West_.

"No more!" He whined, shoving his notebook to the side.

"How do you expect to pass this test if you can't even study properly?" I asked crossly before pushing his notes back in front of him.

"I don't need to study as much as you to pass the stupid thing."

"Oh really?" I reached for his book and read through his notes, "Prove it. Explain to me the study of _Botany_?"

" _Botany,"_ He mimicked me, "Is the scientific study of plants, _including_ their physiology, structures, genetics and so on. . ." He grinned at me and placed his head on the table as I stared down at him, amazed at how quickly he answered the question with no hesitation whatsoever.

"Correct," I cleared my throat, "But what do you call a single piece of coiled DNA-"

"A chromosome."

"The scientific study of fungi is known as-"

"Mycology."

"The change of DNA in an organism that results in a new trait is known as-"

"Mutation." His smile grew wider, mocking me as I gaped at each correct answer he shot out.

"Wow. . ." I paused, "That's really. . ."

"Unexpected? Amazing? Jaw-dropping-"

"Sad." I scoffed before returning back to my own notes.

"Excuse me?" He spoke quietly, "Someone's jealous of my genius-ness."

"Yeah, I'm totally jealous of a somewhat intelligent individual who plays dumb in public and steals other peoples work to _impress_ the crowd." I whispered sarcastically, laughing at the whole façade he carried in front of everyone else on campus.

"I'd rather play dumb then become some dweeb who spends her school hours hiding behind lockers-"

"I never hid from anyone!" I said rather loudly, only to receive an angry glare from the librarian watching us.

" _Right?_ At least my social life doesn't involve getting shoved into walls and eating alone." He bragged confidently, as if that were all high school had to offer a guy like him.

"You're right," I nodded, "My social life at this school does suck, but that's not what's important here."

He stared at me for a long moment, as if everything I had just said were foreign to him, "What do you mean?" He blinked in confusion.

"West," I sighed, "What do you plan on doing after high school?" I asked him a question that most of us were already sure about, something we'd been prepared to answer for years, but for the first time I had finally witness the great Wally West, the school's star athlete and champion, staring at me with eyes full of uncertainty. They were lost and confused and as much as I should have enjoyed seeing that in the eyes of one of my many tormenters on campus, all I could really feel was pity for the boy because. . .

He reminded me so much of myself.

"Maybe I'll just stick with football and see where that takes me. . ." He shrugged and stared down at the ground quietly. The guy that everyone admired and watched roam these halls confidently just sat there with nothing more to say because, in all honesty, it seemed as if the future was something he feared the most. And without all his fans and popularity he knew there'd be nothing left to keep holding him up. . .

"There's more to life than football, West. You seem to be capable of offering so much more than just a pretty face and athletic abilities." I tried comforting him, placing an arm on his shoulder to lighten the mood until he gazed up at me with a sudden smile that broke on his face.

"You think I have a pretty face?"

I rolled my eyes and turned away from the idiotic redhead, "Go die West."

"Gasp!" He joked, "What a cruel thing to say!" He cried out dramatically.

"Shush you two!" The librarian yelled from across the room.

"She says that but _she's_ the only one yelling." I muttered softly, accidentally making the redhead laugh which caused more harm as the old woman continued aiming death glares our way.

"You're something else, Adam's." He tried to breath, lowering the volume of his laughter before saying anymore.

"Just shut up and start working before time runs out."

"But what about you?" He folded his arms on the table and placed his head over them to watch me.

"What about me?" I blinked.

"What do you plan on doing after high school?" His words made me stop to think about the idea for a moment. I had gone this far to keep a promise, but if I were to graduate I'd have numerous opportunities as 'Rose Adams'. _She_ was smart, hardworking, and driven. _She_ could do anything after her high school graduation if _jinx_ had never existed. If that had happened who would I have become? What could I have done if this life had become my _only_ life? What future could 'Rose Adams' create. . .?

"Well. . ."

"No don't tell me!" He cut me off, "Let me guess. A teacher? No, a doctor? Wait, no, a lawyer? Right?" He kept blurting out, bringing a smile on my face at the countless ideas this idiot held for a girl who had died a long time ago. . .

"Actually, a teacher sounds kinda nice. . ." I smiled at the thought of walking into a classroom every morning with people waiting for me to arrive. People who needed me, accepted me, almost like. . .

 _A Family._

"A teacher, huh?" The redhead nodded to himself, "I could see you as a teacher. What kind were you planning to be? Biology?" He teased, holding up the bio notes on the table to get me to laugh.

"I don't know. . ." I thought for a moment until the idea suddenly hit me, "Maybe art?"

"Yeah!" He said loudly, making me jump in my seat and bringing the librarian to give us a final warning, "You could totally teach art with the way I saw you paint back in the room. I think you'd be great at it." He tried to whisper as I laughed the closer he leaned in to speak out of fear of the old woman across from us.

"Maybe, but I'm terrible with kids. They all hate me." I shrugged, letting go of the silly thought of ever becoming anything more than what I am. There was no way I'd be able to live out a dream like that after what I'd already become. The hive five's fearless leader, a criminal, a villain, or better yet. . .

 _A Monster_.

"I disagree." He stared at me, "Kid's don't hate anyone. They don't really know how to hate. Besides, I saw the way you painted back there and there's no way anyone would turn away from you during moments like that. The way you worked gave off this peaceful atmosphere and you seemed almost. . . gentle." I felt my face flush red at hearing the redhead compliment me so highly. The thought of him watching me while I worked brought along a strange sensation in the pit of my stomach that almost made me want to turn away and scream. . . but it was nice. It was _really_ nice.

"Yeah, well, you're wrong about the first part. I think there are children who are capable of feeling nothing other than hatred." I stated, thinking back to my youth as a child where one was taught to fend for themselves in order to survive on their own. "Those who are brought up in a life where there is love may not understand it, but those born without it grow up the opposite - hating everything and everyone out of spite and envy."

"I see your point," He nodded and leaned back in his chair, "But you said it yourself. They're envious, right? Which means they just haven't experienced the greatness of love. I'm sure once they did that all that hatred would gradually fade away."

"I doubt that." I scoffed.

"You speak from experience?" He eyed me.

"Of course not." I lied, avoiding his eyes out of a sudden fear he'd see right through me.

"Well, if I know one thing it's that no matter how far humanity progresses there's always one thing we can't forget or change, and that's to love." I stared up at the boy who's words were strangely different than before. Despite his cluelessness I could now see the 'brainless jock' in a completely different light than from the one he once stood in the moment we first met. It was almost refreshing to see a being become much more than what he was normally portrayed as. . .

"Word's of wisdom," I nodded once, "but it's to be expected of a kid who's got it easy. I'm sure your parent's must be very proud." I smiled sarcastically.

"I wouldn't know. They're dead." The room fell silent and was replaced with a heavy atmosphere. I knew I was out of line and the tension was brought by my thoughtlessness, but that wasn't the main issue. The real problem was the way he said it, emotionless and without a care at all. There was no expression on his face and the smile he had on minutes before had fallen as the mood suddenly became serious. The stone hard look he carried was like nothing I'd ever seen before, there was no anger nor sadness - there was nothing. Just silence.

"I didn't mean to-"

"To what? Mock their deaths? Make assumptions? What are you going to do now? Pity me like everyone else?" He laughed differently then before, dark and sinister like. I didn't know how to react to that or what to say at first.

Until it finally hit me.

"Nope, because I have nothing to pity you for."

"What?" He squinted, confused by response.

"Pity is for those weak and less-fortunate. It's emotion expressed when feeling sorry for those suffering in need - but not you, West. You're none of those things so I have no reason to pity you. Your loss is unfortunate but theirs nothing you'd gain from my feeling sorry for you, because I don't." I finished, staring back at the boy who's strange reactions made sense to me now. They were almost exactly similar to myself after every bit of hope was drained out of me as a child, leaving me with nothing but an empty vessel who'd been forced to shut off all emotions in means of survival. . .

We sat like that for a long moment, silently staring at each other as if something more would occur if we dared look away. Second's passed and the clock continued to tick away in silence. Then, finally, it was broken by the sound of his laughter - his _true_ laughter.

"You're one interesting chick, Adam's." He smiled softly and I couldn't help but to do the same. There were many sides to the redheads characters, and most of them deeply annoyed me, but it was in moments like this that I felt almost comfortable with the school's most well-known student. Despite the mask he carried on during the day it was nice being able to catch a glimpse of the real Wally West not many seemed to be aware of. It was enchanting and charming, and it gave me the strange urge to show him a glimpse of my true face as well.

But, of course, that could never happen.

"Alright you two! Pack it up, the libraries closing!" The librarian yelled through the speakers that had us scurrying out of our seats to get her signature on our tutor trackers before she could ditch us.

It took the woman only seconds to scribble her name on our slips of papers before booting us out into the halls. That's when I noticed the smile that had still been on my face the entire time. I didn't know what it was about West that made me feel so relaxed at these times. In a way he reminded me a lot of a small puppy seeking attention from anyone willing to offer it. He didn't think before he acted but never jumped on the idea of causing harm. He was reckless and thoughtless, but it was almost impossible to stay angry at someone like him. He was like a gust of wind on a hot summer's day or a yellow umbrella shielding you from the rain. He was just so. . .

 _Alluring._

"You heading home right now?" He asked the moment we stepped out of the building.

"Yeah, I guess." I shrugged, gazing up at the clear sky that had been blocked by heavy clouds during our last outing together.

"Well, if you have time, we could go hang out for a bit?"

"Like where? Your little arcade?" I scoffed, "Then what? Be forced to hide if anyone sees us? No thanks." I tried to walk away, but was blocked again by his strangely quick movements.

"No hiding this time, I promise." He held his hand up, "Scouts honor."

"Were you even a scout?" I raised a brow and laughed at the shocked expression that formed on his face.

"Does that only work for scouts?"

I shook my head and silenced my laughter, "Never mind. How can you even guarantee we won't be seen?" I asked, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Because I know a place no one at our school would ever go to," He smiled and gave his hand out to me, "You in?"

I stood there silently debating to myself whether or not to trust this guy anymore than I already did. At the end of the day he was still my biggest enemy on campus, and when tomorrow came around he would go right back to being just that. I knew that, of course I knew that. . . but still. There was something about him that stopped me from turning away. Something that just kept drawing me back every time no matter how hard I tried to resist. . .

"Well. . ." I hesitated, thinking carefully to myself before my hand had suddenly reached out and took his, "I guess I might have a little time to spare."

"Then we better get going before sundown." He smiled, and with that we left running down the street, hand-in-hand, without a second thought.

I don't know what had gotten into me, and why he'd begun to slowly change. I couldn't pin point what it was exactly, but something had changed. Something that might have been out of my control from the very beginning. Whatever it was about the boy that kept bringing me right back was beyond my understanding, yet I didn't want it to end. It had been years since I'd ever felt this free. Years since I'd enjoyed these small moments of my youth, and it was all because of an annoying redhead who wouldn't leave me alone. The aura he emitted, the strange sensations stirring in the pit of my stomach, were things I hadn't fully noticed until this moment. And that's when I finally realized it. The one who had changed hadn't been West and his strange behavior, but in fact, the one who might have begun to change was. . .

 **None other than myself.**


	23. Chapter 22: No More Games

Chapter 22: No More Games

Kid Flash

The air was perfectly warm with a soft breeze that occasionally blew over us. There were children running around the playground, down the paths, and on the field without a care in the world. It had been a while since I had returned to the place that held most of my childhood. This was my haven, my escape, and the secret place I used to run to whenever I was in need of it. It was here, and only here, that I could look back and remember those small moments I used to enjoy with my parents. This was our secret place and it had been that way for years. No one else knew about it and I didn't dare bring any one along since their deaths. That is. . .

Until today.

"It's official. You most definitely have the mentality of a five year old." Said the dweeb standing beside me.

"C'mon who doesn't love going to the park sometimes?" I nudged, "You don't have to be a kid to play on a slide." I joked, trying to bring back that smile on her face.

"Of course _you'd_ say that." She exhaled deeply before heading over to one of the wooden benches in the area.

"Ah, you're just full of positivity aren't you." I said sarcastically.

"Ha Ha." She glared, "Excuse me if I don't find swinging on filthy metal bars even remotely 'fun'." She stated before sitting down on a bench and tossing her bag underneath as strangers passed us by.

"Okay, okay, I guess we just have two completely different ideas of fun." I admitted, taking a seat next to her.

"I'll say." She muttered softly and turned her eyes away from me.

"But don't you kind of miss how much fun it used to be as a kid in a place like this? The way you could just run up to any kid around and end up playing the entire day together as if you were best friends, even though you'd only just met. . ." I smiled as the memories of my younger years began pouring back into my head.

"I wouldn't know. . ." I heard her say quietly. There was a long silence as I watched her sitting with that same expressionless look on her face. She knew how to mask anything and everything she felt and I had begun to understand that the more time I spent with her. But I also knew that there was still a lot more she hid from me, and everyone else, and that was what drove me to learn more. Who exactly was Rose Adams? And what exactly went on in that head of hers that made it impossible for anyone to fully understand her on any level. . .?

"Not meaning to pry, but, what exactly happened to your. . .?"

"My parents?" She turned to me, "I don't know. I only ever knew my mother and she was eager to get rid of us the moment she could." She shrugged, speaking casually as if the event no longer affected her.

"What do you mean _us_?"

Her eyes grew wide at my question, "My sister. . ." She said in a hushed tone.

"You have a-"

" _Had_." She stated, "She's gone now."

"Oh. . ." I looked down awkwardly, "So, then you're in the foster- "

"Nope. I take care of myself all on my own." She explained, and I couldn't help but feel slightly guilty after hearing those words. Here I was constantly whining about my problems when I was sitting next to a girl who not only spent her hours at school alone, but was forced to also do the same whenever she went back home. The whole idea of high school was set up as an escape for me, and I'm sure she probably felt the same, the only difference was that while I enjoyed _mine_ I'd also been taking part in destroying _hers_.

"Listen, I'm sorry about everything I've said and done before. I never meant -"

"Why do you keep doing that?" She suddenly asked, sounding rather annoyed at me.

"Doing what?"

"Apologizing and trying to make yourself feel better? If you're really sorry then just stop-"

"I can't!" I said loudly, making her jump a little.

"Why not?" She stared, "Why do you feel the need to please everyone all the time?"

"Because. . ." I murmured, avoiding her eyes in hopes of dropping the entire conversation all together.

"Because, why? Is it just because you're afraid of losing all your popularity and-"

"That's not it." I cut her off.

"Then tell me why?" She demanded, watching me carefully as I remained quiet for a few moments deciding whether or not to tell her the truth. I had already opened up to her more than I had ever done with anyone and I had no reason to really hide anything from her. But it might have been more than just that. I think what really bothered me was if I could really trust the girl? An outsider. Someone I hadn't known for very long, yet felt strangely comfortable in sharing everything else with up to this point. Even though I didn't understand any of it, or why it was _this_ difficult to simply ignore her, I knew there was no point in stopping now. . .

"I made a promise to someone once. . ." I inhaled deeply, "A promise I couldn't keep and because of that I feel like I'm to blame for their mistakes. That's why I can't do that again, because if I did I'd never be able to live with myself knowing that it'd be all my fault if -"

"You really are an idiot, West." She shook her head and stared straight ahead at the children on the swings.

"You just don't get it."

"You're right, I don't." She laughed, "I don't get how you could be held responsible for every mistake another person makes because you couldn't make them happy. The decisions they made don't reflect on you, and I'm sure they didn't make every mistake based solely on you. You're just being ridiculous."

"It's not ridiculous!" I snapped, "If I had done what I promised I could have saved them and then -"

"And then what!?" She yelled, staring back at me with the same anger I carried in my own eyes, "We've all been let down and disappointed at some point in our lives! But the decisions we make fall on us, and us alone - not you!" She pointed at me and got back up on her feet, "We don't make mistakes in spite of those who hurt us. We make them because we're human, which is why you can't go around thinking you can save everyone when it's only going to get you feeling miserable!"

"But -"

"No!" She raised a hand to my face and took a deep breath, "West, you might think that by going along with what your friends expect of you is the right thing, but there are still people who get hurt by those decisions you make. You can't save everyone, so why don't you just focus on saving yourself." After she finished I opened my mouth to say something, anything to win against her argument. A million ideas went through my head to beat the girl no one else could, but in the end I knew she was right. Even if this argument continued on any further she'd still be right and I accepted that, because all she had done was speak what I'd been to scared to admit to myself.

"You're right. . ." I nodded, laughing quietly to myself after she turned away.

"Of course I am." She turned her back to me and continued watching the children from afar, gazing at them with the same twinkle in her eyes she had the last time we hung out. Things like these never felt out of the ordinary to a guy like me, they were moments I took for granted, but to someone like her a simple day out seemed almost new. And despite the front she always put on, she was more of a child than myself. The world still carried so many secrets in her eyes and it fascinated me to watch her view them for the first time. . .

"Well, now that the great guru has given me her wisdom -" I pushed myself off the bench, "How about we go play on the slide!"

"Pass." She scoffed again before turning the opposite direction.

"C'mon, just for 10 minutes!" I begged after grabbing onto her wrist.

"Forget it, West. I'm not going to look like an idiot."

"Says the girl with the whole I-don't-care attitude." I mocked, pulling her forward as she tried to break free.

"I'm not kidding, West! Let me go!" She screamed loudly, making me panic at her strange reaction as she began pulling away.

"Calm down I was just -"

"Stop touching me you - Ah!" Her scream echoed around the area after I had immediately released her arm, only to have her come falling to the floor. Normally I wouldn't have cared if an outsider like her had fallen flat on her face in front of the group of people that stopped to stare. Especially after making such a dramatic scene by my simply pulling on her arm. She deserved to hit the ground like an idiot, to be laughed at for always going against everything I said or did. She deserved it. . .

At least, that's what I thought until the guilt in my chest had gotten the better of me and brought me to zip down and catch her in my arms before any injuries could be made. That was, until my balance had failed me and had us rolling down a hill together. I held the girl in my arms tightly until we came to safe stop, knowing very well that it had been nothing more but the hero inside me that couldn't let some puny dweeb get hurt because of me. That's why I did it. It had to be. It's not like I actually cared for the girl or anything like that - that was impossible. It was instinct that's all. There couldn't be any other reason for it. . .

 _Right?_

"West, get off of me." She groaned painfully, and that's when I realized I had been lying on top of her the entire time she laid beneath me on the grass. I pushed myself off of her a bit, ready to jump back on my feet and pretend like the incident never happened when, suddenly, my eyes had caught sight of hers. And with our faces being only inches away I started to see a stronger resemblance between her and the pink haired thief miles away from here. . . Why was that?

I tried to ignore those thoughts and prepared myself to pull away, get up and walk off like nothing had happened if she said anything. If she had yelled at me, pushed me away, and carried on with her usual sassy attitude. That's what I was waiting for, that's what I'd expected, but instead, she stayed still and silent. Our eyes locked with each other in an almost unbreakable trance that neither of us ever attempted to pull away from. And as seconds passed I had lost all sense of my sanity after moments of gazing into the eyes that reminded me so much of someone else.

A hand soon reached down to cup the side of her face, and I soon discovered it had been none other than my own. She made no effort to scream this time or escape as a strange force pulled us closer to one another. It had all occurred so quickly, faster than my own speed, and I wasn't sure who initiated it first, but before I knew it, our lips had finally touched. A strange sensation washed over me immediately and there was no way of breaking away in that moment.

Never had I ever dreamed of a moment like this. That a simple kiss from a girl like her could feel this. . . _real._ It wasn't my first kiss, and it wouldn't be my last, but there was something different about it - different about _her_. What exactly I wasn't sure? But the longer my lips remained placed over hers sent a wave of electricity burning deep in my chest, and it brought me yearning for _more_. There was no hope of stopping, nothing else mattered but this moment, and I never wanted it to end. . .

"Wally. . ." The girl whispered beneath me after pulling away, separating us and forcing me to jump away from the insanity I had gotten lost in.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't. . ." I lost my voice, unable to find the words to bounce back after a moment like that. I had no explanation for my actions and could only break away from her to put an end to it all.

"It's fine." She cleared her throat and pushed herself back up on her feet, "I should get going."

"Right, same here. . ." I agreed awkwardly before getting back up, "We should probably -"

"Never speak of this again." She decided before walking back up the hill to grab her things.

"Yeah, that's what I was going to say." I nodded, and watched her take her bag in her hand and head down the streets alone without ever looking back. I waited there until she was out of sight before falling back to the floor. I could feel my entire face burning red at the memory of the kiss replaying in my head and searched for a reasonable explanation to it all. . .

But there was nothing.

What was worse was the fact that I wasn't sure if those feelings were sincere because I was kissing Rose Adams, or if it was because she looked so much like _her_. I'd be lying if I denied feeling anything while kissing the Adam's girl, as much as I didn't want to accept it. However, I couldn't be sure who these feelings were truly directed towards. The Rose I once knew, who's identity had been morphed into jinx, was the only girl that'd ever had a place in my heart. She was the one I'd wanted since the moment we first met, but with the Adam's girl in the picture I couldn't be sure anymore. I knew nothing could ever happen with either of the two without risking everything in both worlds I co-existed in. That was unavoidable, but what pissed me off the most was not understanding my own feelings. What was I after? Or better yet, _who_ was I after?

"I have to do it." I whispered to myself after making the final decision. There was no way I'd ever figure any of it out by sitting around thinking to myself, and there were still questions that needed to be answered. I wasn't going to hide away any longer - I needed to know what I wanted. Even if that meant taking drastic measures. This was it, no turning back, there was no doubt in my mind. Tonight I'd face her and then finally. . .

 **I'd have my answer.**


	24. Chapter 23: Goodbyes

Chapter 23: Goodbyes

Jinx

The sun had already begun to set when I arrived home, painting the sky purple and red to announce the day's end. It's vibrant colors similar to the bright red that had been stained on my face the entire bus ride here. My heart had never raced like it did today by a simple kiss, something that I'd done countless of times in the past. The memory of it kept replaying in my head, and I knew how upset I was at the redhead for what he'd done. After stealing a kiss like that in public for all to see. Not that it surprised me. After all he was known around campus for toying with the hearts of every girl he interacted with, that was something everyone knew. Which was why I was upset at how easily I had let him fool me. . .

 _What was wrong with me?_

Not only had I just tainted my own reputation by falling victim to the biggest player on campus, but I couldn't understand why I'd let him get away with it in the first place? I was angry, of course I was angry, and yet I did nothing but lay there and let him do whatever he wanted like an idiot. What was worse was that I couldn't shake the feeling he gave me after the incident. He was no better than every man I'd encountered. The wolves who hid in sheep's clothing, he was nothing more than a vicious animal. I knew that. I've always known that, and I vowed I would never let another a stunt like that ever happen again - so why did I allow him to get away with it? Why couldn't I ignore these feelings lurking within me?

What made _him_ so different?

"Jinx!" Seymour yelled from the couch as I stepped into the living room after removing my wig.

"What are you guy's-"

"Check it out, Mammoth managed to steal us some grub from the burger joint down the street." Seymour explained, laughing and high fiving the larger teen sitting on the couch beside him.

"All I did was punch a hole in the wall and they just went running." Mammoth said before munching on various meals placed on the living room floor.

"Them dumb titans were too busy with brotherhood business to even pay attention to us now." Billy snickered as I stood watching them giggling like idiots at pulling such a childish stunt.

"Are you all really this stupid!" I yelled, as they each froze to look at me, "How could you do something this dumb when we might be minutes away from getting an acceptance call from Madame Rouge!"

"Screw Madame _scrooge_ -" Seymour spoke out, jumping over the couch to approach me quicker, "So what if we robbed something to eat? We're criminals, we steal, what's so wrong about -"

"Because, nit-wit! If we keep pulling simple acts like this then that's all we'll ever be known for! How is that going to make us look any better in their -"

"Alright enough!" He yelled, bringing me to lose my own voice at seeing him upset, "This whole obsession you have with the dudes is getting on my nerves!"

"Yeah!" Billy agreed, "You're no fun no more, and ever since you got mixed up with them brotherhood folk you've started to change. . ."

"You mean ever since she got mixed up with that stupid _kid flash_." Gizmo glared at me before turning away completely. I felt a sharp pain gnawing in my chest at the expressions they each carried, not even Kyd Wykkyd would face me now. These were their true thoughts that had finally surfaced, what they'd been thinking all along, and I couldn't help but feel ashamed at seeing them this way. . . But I refused to accept that this was my fault. All I'd done was fight in their best interest to maintain this family and avenge what we'd lost. I wouldn't apologize for that, and if they couldn't see that then the one's who had completely changed hadn't been me. . .

But _them_.

"You're wrong. . ."

"Where do you stand, _jinx_?" Seymour asked, "If you don't think that we're good enough to fight along side you, then you can go and join them if you want. The jinx I know used to be all about having fun in whatever we did, be it good or bad, but now you're just all about business and -" The room fell silent with only one sound echoing and bouncing off the walls. The other's eyes stopped and stared, stunned by my action after slapping Seymour across the face. Even I was surprised at raising a hand to one of my own teammates, allies, friends. . . family.

He stepped back and looked at me with a hand placed on his cheek. This is what it had come down to, what my anger had forced me to do because of what they'd become. We weren't just thieves or monsters, but I don't think they understood that. We didn't fall into this life by choice, but it seemed like that was something they had forgotten at some point. . .

"Are you all really satisfied with just that? Or have you been too busy enjoying your freedom that you've forgotten why we started this whole thing in the first place?"

"Jinx this isn't about that -" Seymour tried to say.

"But it is!" I snapped, "This is what it's always been about! We escaped hell for one purpose, and one purpose only, so that we could get revenge on the people who did this to us! So that we could make them pay for the thousands of lives lost back there and for turning us into these. . . _monsters_!" I threw my bag to the ground as the anger inside me continued to rise. My teammates, my own family, had gotten so used to the lives they'd been living now that they'd forgotten everything we had endured in the past. Maybe it was because it didn't matter to them anymore, or because they didn't suffer enough - but I did. This was the decision we made long ago, yet it seemed like I was the only one sticking to it these days. . .

And that ticked me off!

"I know that's what we said before, but things are better now. Why do we have to get caught up in all this when we're free now. . ?" Gizmo suddenly asked, and judging by the looks the others had given him I knew they were all aware of what was coming next.

"You were a lot younger when it happened, you probably can't even remember everything that occurred back then in detail. . . but I do." I muttered, pushing Seymour out of my way as I moved towards the child on the couch, "I died in that prison only to be resurrected as the monster I am today. These people took everything away from me - my family, my friends, my dignity, and my life! And if you all refuse to fight beside me because you're comfortable with the way you live now then fine. That's your decision, but facts are, the only ones who have changed are you idiots! Not me!" I tried to breathe as the tears in my eyes escaped on their own. There was nothing I'd done wrong - nothing at all except seek justice for what had been stolen from me. I was nothing more but an empty vessel who knew nothing more but hatred. That much of it was true, but I accepted that long ago when I realized that I was not alone. I thought at least I'd have allies to stand beside me, who understood me, and would fight with me until the end. That's what I told myself, but now I realize. . .

That may have been nothing but a _lie_.

"Jinx. . ." Seymour reached out for me, only to be shoved away in seconds.

"Don't touch me!" I screamed, watching the others who gaped at me, "None of you get it! All I've ever tried to do was reach the goal I thought we all had set in our minds by searching for greater power. I just wanted to make everyone pay for what they'd done to me - done to _all_ of us!"

"We know that but -"

"No! You don't!" I yelled, cutting Seymour off before I went running down the hall, "You're all on your own!"

I ran into my room the moment I reached the door, tossing my jacket to the floor and locking myself in before falling to the ground. In my mind there had been only one reason for me to continue living, and it was for all this. To make those who ruined us pay, and not simply for my sake, but for _theirs_. I'd watched them be broken down and toyed with as if we were nothing more than guinea pigs waiting to be tested on. The emptiness, the pain, and struggle broke us down each day we stayed in that prison, giving us less reasons to continue on in this life. The lives lost their, taken, or stolen told us that death was the only solution to escape.

But we proved them wrong.

We broke out, we were free and we finally had a voice. The path we chose may not have been the greatest, but it was the only option for us to gain more power. It was never for world domination or entertainment, we chose this life because we didn't have a choice. That's what I'd always thought, but had it just been me all along? Had I been the only one running toward this dream on my own the entire time? Had the life we created here erased what we'd originally fought for in their minds? Or could it be, that all this time, during every battle. . .

I had been fighting all alone?

"I was wondering when you'd finally show up." A voice spoke in the darkness of my room, bringing me to jump back up on my feet to watch it's figure rise from my bed.

"You. . ." I stared at the boy who approached me closer in his uniform, "I didn't know heroes had the right to bend the law to their will."

"What makes you say that?" The redhead asked, clearly smiling in the darkness he hid in.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but wouldn't this be called breaking and entering. I should have you arrested."

"I don't think it counts when it involves breaking into a criminals home. However, I won't stop you from calling the cops. I'm sure they'd _love_ to discover the hive five's secret base." He said, grinning after turning my bedroom lamp on and restoring light back into the room.

"Why are you here?" I asked before wiping the tears that had fallen earlier.

"Are you okay?" He came toward me with worried eyes, forcing me to step further away.

"Stay away from me!" I ordered, raising both hands to him, "If you're here to mess around then just leave -"

"I'm here for answers." He spoke in a serious tone that I hadn't heard too often from him, and that's when I knew what his true intentions were by coming to see me.

"So it's finally come down to this." I walked over to my bed and sat down as he watched me closely, "I never expected to meet you again like this - as Rudolph that is."

"Wow. . ." He softly chuckled, "I haven't been called that name in a long time." He admitted, confusing me as I gazed up at him standing before me.

"What? You're telling me you lied about that too?"

"I never lied about anything." His face fell serious again, and I couldn't help but laugh in mockery of the hero who had me fooled this whole time.

"Right. . ." I fell back on my bed, "What exactly are you hoping to learn by coming to meet me? You know my secret now, so why not just arrest me?"

"Just answer my questions, will ya?" He sounded rather annoyed.

"No promises." I shrugged in my bed.

"Can't you be serious for a second?" He asked only to receive my silence as a response, "Rose, just tell me what happened that night?"

"First of all," I sat up to face him, "My name's not rose - it's jinx, and if you're looking for answers you're going to have to be more specific. I've had many nights in the years I've been alive, after all."

"Okay, _jinx_ ," He rolled his eyes, "I want to know about the night you were taken after our first encounter." His words brought me to relive the torment I'd endured back into my head. The sleepless nights of testing, the abuse, and torture came rushing back to me all at once, making me want to turn away and scream - but instead I shoved those feelings away and forced a smile on my face to answer him truthfully.

"Simple, they took me to hell." The last word of that sentence brought fear into the redheads eyes as he studied me carefully in hopes of better understanding my twisted mind.

"What do you mean?" He asked, hesitant at first.

"I mean just what I said. They took me somewhere far and dark, where nothing but evil lurked." I stared down at the ground for a moment, "It was a great evil that killed thousands of forgotten children, including me. . ." I paused to peek up at the redhead again, "The same evil that you fight to serve."

"What do you mean-"

"The government moron!" I yelled before pushing myself off the bed, "They took us away and turned us into this because no one else cared what'd happen to us!" I began to laugh, "But that shouldn't bother you. I mean you were lucky, you had someone who wanted you around and saved you from joining the rest of us. . ." I glared at him, slightly envious, before undoing the pendant around my neck and tossing it over to him, "You can have that back now. It never did me any good anyway."

"jinx, please, it doesn't have to be this way. You can come with me and we can seek justice for the ones who did all of this to -"

"You think that's all it was? As if seeing them locked up could ever be enough for what they did to me?" I snapped at his ignorance, "They destroyed us - all of us! And I won't rest until I've done the same to each of them with my own hands, and there's nothing you can do that will help me do that!" I screamed, shoving him away as the tips of my fingers began to spark.

"You think doing any of that will make you feel better? That it'll change what they've done to you or -"

"I don't care!" I cried out, "I want them dead! All of them! And then after that I'll kill all of you for standing by while the rest of us had been suffering right under you the whole -" My words were stopped after he zipped over and held me tightly in his arms.

"I'm sorry. . ." His arms trembled around me, and I could sense the tears escaping his eyes as mines eventually did the same, "I should have done something, I should have tried harder to find you, this is all my fault. That's why I can't stand by and watch you fall apart even more!"

"L-Let go of me!" I demanded, trying to escape the hands of the boy that once enchanted me as a child.

"I won't! I can't let you hurt anyone else because of me -"

"This has nothing to do with you!"

"But it does!" He yelled, pulling away a little to face me, "Listen to me, killing them won't solve anything. Once they're dead that's it, they're gone forever. They'll never have gotten the chance to fully understand the pain they'd inflicted on you, and all you'll have done was finish what they started by tearing you completely apart! That's why I refuse to let you do that to yourself!"

"Like it matter's to you! Your words mean nothing, they never have, just like that stupid necklace of yours." I glanced over at the pendant on the ground and he did nothing but follow my eyes, "Instead of happiness all it's done is bring even more misery into my life. . ."

"I know how much you might hate me, and how I've let you down, but, please, let me make up for it. Let me help you this time." He pleaded, tightening his hold on me.

"You never let me down, because I never had much faith in your words anyway. . ." I turned away from him, "Now let me go."

"No!" He yelled and pulled me back in to keep me in his embrace, "I can't!"

"I'm serious-" I struggled in his arms, "Let me go!" I panicked, pushing myself away until his heavy force brought me to lose my balance and had us falling to the bed.

 _"Don't worry, Rosie. We're just going to play a little game. . ."_

I screamed at the top of my lungs, kicking the speedster away from me with all my might as I tried pulling away from him. The memories came flooding back, my tears blinding me by blurring my surroundings. I felt myself detach from my own body until I couldn't feel a thing at all, and suddenly I was beginning to slowly slip away. There was nothing. I was nothing. All that was left was darkness as everything cease to exist. It relaxed me and I felt at great peace, until a tiny speck of light appeared again. Then a voice. A voice so warm and gentle it carried me right back into reality. . .

 _". . .inx. . ."_

 _". . .jinx. . ._

 ** _"Jinx!"_**

"What. . . ?" I found myself staring at the ceiling as the redhead shook my shoulders.

"Thank god. . ." He deeply exhaled, sounding relieved to find me staring back at him, "I thought you were going to die!" His eyes were full of pain as he rested his head on my chest for a moment.

"What happened?" I asked, before he jumped off the bed and stepped away.

"You were screaming for a long time, and then you just stopped and kept staring at the ceiling. I didn't know what to do, and then you weren't breathing and I. . ." He had no words, and I knew it had just been another one of my episodes that had him worried.

"I just don't like being touched. . ."

"No, it's more than just that." He shook his head, "Did they do something to -"

"I'm done talking." I declared and turned to face the opposite direction.

"Jinx, you have to talk to me -"

"I don't have to do anything with someone I can't even trust!"

"But you _can_ trust me -"

"Prove it." I whipped around to look at him, "Take off the mask."

"My mask. . . ?" His face turned a ghastly pale at my request, and I knew he had trouble deciding as he pondered on the idea in front of me.

"It shouldn't be a problem. You're aware of my secret, so let me know yours." I watched him struggle to answer until his eyes dropped to the floor, and that's when I knew it'd been pointless from the start. He'd never trust me, not enough to tell me the truth, or better yet, _show_ me the truth. There was no use in even trying. . .

"I can't. . ."

"Of course you can't." I laughed, shaking my head at him before waving him off, "You can just leave then."

"Jinx, please -"

"How do you expect me to share anything with someone hiding behind a mask!" A small laugh escaped my lips, "How do I even know you really are who you say you are if I can't even see you?"

"I would never lie to -"

"Don't." I said sternly, "I can't keep doing this anymore. Whether or not you are someone I used to know doesn't matter at this point, because we live in two completely different worlds now. We can't pretend like that'll ever change."

"Rose just listen to me -"

"Stop calling me that! Rose is dead!" My words hit him hard as he stumbled back a little, "And she's never coming back." I finally said before turning away from him completely.

"So, that's it?" His voice shook as he waited for the final farewell.

"We're enemies. That means I won't rest until I've beaten and annihilated you and your kind. That's something that'll never change." I felt my throat close up at the escape of my own words. This was something that needed to be said, something I needed to hear in order to fully grasp and accept what had already been written down by fate. The two of us could never again laugh and smile freely together like before. We could never go back to that first meeting as much as we may have craved it. This was unavoidable. Our desires could not stand in the way of what we fought for. . .

And he knew that very well.

"Fine. . ." He whispered before the room fell silent for a long moment. I kept my back to him the entire time, not wanting to face whatever expression he may have carried on his face. Whether it'd have been anger, hatred or worse. . . sadness. Because as much as I hated to admit, even I felt a sharp pain pulling at my heart strings at saying goodbye to the past we shared. He had been nothing but a dream of mine all these years, a being that existed in the far back of my head who waited for me in my castle in the sky. But that was all gone now. . .

 _He_ was gone now.

"Jinx!" Seymour yelled from behind the door and I immediately panicked until I spun around and found that the redhead was no longer with me. He might have disappeared a while ago, and as much as it ached, it also gave me a sense of relief. He was gone for good this time. I would no longer need to face Rudolph ever again, even if I encountered Kid flash some time in the future. This was a good thing. I knew it was and I could finally say goodbye to all of it, because the moment he left I knew. . .

He had taken the last bit of my humanity with him.

"Jinx. . ." Seymour stepped inside cautiously, "Can we talk?"

"Seymour I -"

"We're really sorry!" He clapped his hands together and lowered his head, "Please, don't hate us. You were right, we messed up. We'll do better next time! So, please don't leave -" I ran over and held him to stop him from saying anymore. This was all I needed, all I deserved, and all I wanted. This was my home and no matter where I went I'd always come right back. There was no escaping that. . .

"Woah, you okay? Did something happen?" He asked, trying to pull me away to get a better look at me, but I refused to budge and only held on tighter.

"No. . ." I laughed through my tears and hid my face in his chest, "It's all over now."

I had everything I could ever ask for with me now. I didn't need anything else, honestly, and I would do everything that was needed to maintain it all. I wouldn't let us fall apart and crumble back to the ground again. We had come so far to reach this place, to be free again, and live solely for one another. This was all that mattered to me, even if no one else could see it or understand that. They didn't have to, as long as I knew. That's all that mattered. . .

 **And nothing would ever change that.**


	25. Chapter 24: We're To Blame

Chapter 24: We're To Blame

Kid Flash

The cool air entered swiftly through my open window, falling over me as a reminder of the reality I existed in. I stood silently by my closet door after changing out of my uniform and into my nightwear, trying to avoid recollecting what I had witnessed only hours ago with my mothers pendant hidden in my hand. It had been worse than I had ever expected. The fear in her eyes, the anger and hatred, were all forced onto her because of us - because of _me_. If I had kept my promise I could have saved her from all of that, but if anyone had paid attention they could have done the same. The flash, batman, the justice league - even the cops - anyone would have been fine. It didn't matter who they were but no one ever noticed her, or any of those children.

This was all our fault.

 _"I should have been faster. . ."_ I quietly thought to myself after tossing the necklace onto my bed. My mind couldn't help but repeatedly go through all the time I'd wasted during my youth that could have been spent in search of her. I could have found her if I had been quicker about it, if I hadn't given up. . . But I did. I stopped halfway through because I wasn't aware of the damage it'd inflict on her. I was selfish. . . and that was what I deeply regretted.

 _"They took me to hell. . ."_

 _"You were lucky, you had someone who wanted you around and saved you from joining the rest of us. . ."_

 _"Rose is dead! And she's never coming back. . ."_

"Dammit!" My screams finally escaped, anger wiping out all sanity for a moment, and bringing my fist to slam into the wall. There was no use of complaining now, I had failed her and that was a fact. Why couldn't I have saved her? Why couldn't I keep her safe? Why couldn't I do anything right?

 _What was wrong with me?_

"Wally!" My aunt's voice called for me, snapping me back to reality.

"What. . ." I stared down at my fist colored in purple and blue when I finally realized what I had just done. It had happened so quickly that I hadn't even noticed the throbbing pain in my joints. It scared me to even think about how far my anger had driven me, and I could only imagine how afraid my aunt had been after rushing into my room to find me this way.

"What happened!?" She panicked, holding my hand in a wet towel, "Why would you -"

"I'm sorry, Aunt I." I apologized softly, sliding my hand away from her gentle hold, "I'll fix the wall later." I said before brushing past her to reach my bed.

"Wally, what is going on with you?" She asked, worry found in her tone, "Did something happen? You haven't said a word since -"

"I'm fine!" I placed a hand over my mouth almost instantly after lashing out at her. This had nothing to do with her, none of it did. Yet here I was taking my anger out on the first person to approach me out of concern for my own well-being. . .

 _I'm the worst._

"What's going on in here?" My uncle shouted only to come running in a few minutes after, immediately turning to the hole in the wall before looking to us.

"I'm sorry I just. . ." There was nothing more I could say after that. It felt like I'd mess up again if I even tried. I could lie, I could be honest, whatever decision I made wouldn't matter, because I knew I'd mess it up every time. That was who I was, who I'd always been, and I realized now that would never change. . .

"Iris -" My uncle called to her from the doorway, "Can I talk to Wally alone?" He asked, watching me after she nodded and stepped out of the room.

"Uncle B, I promise I'll fix the wall -"

"I'm sure you will. That's not what I'm concerned about?" He sighed, walking over to me before I sat down on my bed, "I'm more worried about why you would do that in the first place? What's gotten into you?"

"Nothing." I groaned, avoiding looking up at the man determined to find answers.

"C'mon, kid," He sat down beside me, "Something has to be bugging you? What is it? Get into another heated argument with robin? Or did you just -"

"It's my fault. . ." The words I'd dreaded to hear had managed to finally escape my lips, and I could feel my eyes stinging as the tears began to fall on their own, "It's all my fault!" The screams eventually flew out of me after finding myself unable to express my frustration in any other way. There was nothing I could do but drown in my own misery as my uncle held me in his arms. Never had I been so angry, disgusted, and ashamed at myself then I did in that moment. To hear those words come from her own mouth, the truth of what my betrayal had caused her, had all together pushed me over the edge. . .

 _"You never let me down, because I never had much faith in your words anyway. . ."_

"I couldn't save her. . . why couldn't I save her!?" That was the question I'd been asking myself from the moment she'd been taken from me. I'd lost to the adults who had commited a crime I gave up on years ago, and because of that I failed to protect her. I couldn't keep my promise and that was what had driven her into this madness. The monster she claimed to be, the people she blamed it on, none of that made any sense. She claimed in seeking revenge on those who had inflicted all this pain, when the real culprit had been running past her all this time. Even if she managed to succeed in her plans she'd never recover, because none of them were to blame for this mess. The only one at fault, the only one who could ever be held responsible wasn't the old hag or the government, because at the end it all fell down on one person, and one person alone. . .

 _And that was **me**._

"Calm down, kid. . ." My uncle whispered, comforting me in hopes of erasing the pain gnawing at my chest, "Now let's just try and talk about this calmly -"

"No." I shook my head and removed myself from his arms, "I'm sorry, Uncle B. I wasn't thinking clearly." I tried to laugh, wiping away the tears that had clearly worried him deeply.

"You sure? It's not like you to act that way. I haven't seen you cry that much since. . ." He stopped himself from saying anymore, because we both knew how that sentence would end. He was right though, it wasn't in my usual character to behave this way, and letting my emotions pour out wouldn't do anyone any good here.

"Yeah, I was just, uh, upset about. . . s-suzy!" I lied, trying to cover up the real reason for my strange behavior.

"Suzy?"

"Yeah, she's one of the main character's in this video game I borrowed. I really screwed up big time and couldn't save her before the zombies captured her!"

"Really?" He raised a brow at me.

"It was a pretty tough game!" I tried explaining loudly, "You wouldn't believe how difficult it was to keep that girl alive, and all for nothing! I don't know how anyone's suppose to pass it like that!" I forced a sigh and fell on my bed, shoving my face in my pillow to avoid lying even more to the man.

"Uh huh. . ." He sounded unsure, "Well if that's it then I'd suggest giving up on the game all together. You shouldn't play a game that'll upset you that badly." He suggested after letting out a soft chuckle.

"Will do!" I mumbled through my pillow, raising a thumb in the air to agree with his opinion.

"Alright, kiddo, I'm heading to bed then." He announced.

"Night!" I waved him off, watching him get off my bed and head towards the door before he came to a sudden stop and spun back to face me.

"Oh! That reminds me. I tried doing what you asked before. . ." He paused, and then whispered, "I managed to look into those files centered on the criminal you were talking about before."

"Jinx?" I jumped back up on my bed.

"Yeah, that's her. I did all I could but for some reason there weren't any files centering on her background. The police couldn't trace anything about her, or her teammates for that matter, at any point before her first arrest. They couldn't identify any of them at all. . ."

"I see. . ." I fell back on my bed, "Thanks, Uncle B, I appreciate the effort but you don't have to do anymore digging on her."

"Really? You seemed pretty interested before? And I can't help but feel a little suspicious about the girl and her team. I mean, I know I was doing it as a favor but there's something going on with that group and I feel that we should try -"

"Just stop." I begged, "Please, uncle B, I don't want to deal with any of them anymore. You were right, it's best if we just leave it to Robin and his team. After all, jump city is titan's territory. They can take care of it on their own."

"You sure about that?" My uncle asked, scanning me with his eyes before I shrugged in response.

"It's better this way." I decided before turning away from the man in the room and laid facing the wall.

"Alright, kiddo. Then I'll see you in the morning." He said softly, and with that left the room after locking the door behind him. I let out a deep sigh the moment I realized I was alone, relieved at how I was able to end the conversation without too much trouble from the other two. It was selfish of me to drown in my own sorrow with them in the house, knowing very well the worry I'd only stir by sharing this with anyone else.

My hand reached for the pendant laying beside me, dangling it over me as the moon's light brought it to shimmer. There used to be a time where memories of my parents deaths would flash through my head whenever my eyes laid upon the small piece of jewelry. It was nothing more but a reminder in being of no help to them after the accident. That was why I had been so eager to get rid of it, to lose the pendant that most certainly caused my mother's death as well. It was bad luck from the start, yet, I handed it right over in hopes that would change if it found a new owner. Someone who could cherish and protect it, that's what I'd hoped, but in the end it only brought along the same affect. . .

 _"Your words mean nothing, they never have, just like that stupid necklace of yours."_

"Dammit!" I shouted again, jumping back up to rush over to the open window in the room. I stood in front of it, the pendant raised high in my hand, ready to destroy the key to all our misfortune. This was the reason everything kept going wrong, what drove us apart, what destroyed her. All I needed to do was throw it right out and be done with it all. That's all it'd take. One throw and it'd be over. . .

That's what I'd hoped at least.

But, honestly, I knew keeping it or throwing it away wouldn't change anything now. It wouldn't bring my parent's back to life, it wouldn't get her to stop hating me, it wouldn't change what they'd done to her, and it wouldn't help me in gaining her trust back. If I had tossed it out before, maybe I would have had a chance, but it's too late now. The damage had been done and all that was left for me was to stand here and accept the destruction I had created. . .

That's all I _could_ do.

The shame returned as the pain remained, eating away at what was left of me. I'm not sure how long I'd stood there, holding my mothers necklace while gazing up at the moon that hung over us. It might have been a few seconds, minutes, or hours even, because my thought's had been filled with nothing but her that time felt as if it no longer existed. And I might have stayed that way all night if it hadn't been for the buzzing noise let out by the cellphone on my dresser.

The mobile device had sent reality to pull me back in order to answer the late night caller. After that it didn't take long for me to race over to check and see that the one calling had been none other than Linda Park who'd already tried to phone me for the third time today. I would have answered earlier if I hadn't decided to run over and see jinx, and I knew if I ignored the call again she'd suspect something was wrong. I shut my eyes for a moment, trying to piece myself back together before clicking a button and bringing the device to my ear.

"Hey, beautiful. What's up?"

"Wally," She giggled, "You finally decided to pick up."

"Sorry, I had some family stuff I needed to do." I said casually and fell back on my bed to finish the conversation, "So, what you need?"

"Well, since homecoming's the day after tomorrow, I was wondering if you wanted to just meet up at the school or something?"

"No worries, I can pick you up at your place if you want?" I shrugged in my bed.

"You have a license?"

"Nope, I have a permit." I said, making her laugh again over the phone.

"Okay, well then I'll just message you my address later."

"Then it's settled. I'll pick you up at eight."

"Alright," She agreed, "See you then."

"Later." I finished before hanging up and tossing my phone to the end of my bed. There wasn't any time for me to worry about jinx anymore. There's nothing I'd gain by crying about what could have been when I already had enough going on. The dance was already one of my main priorities now, along with the team and the bio test coming up. If I failed that I knew there'd be no way the adam's girl would ever forgive me. . .

 _"You know what, Shawn? I change my mind. I'd love to go to the dance with you."_

The whole idea of seeing one of my biggest threats on campus going to the dance with that dweeb made me cringe. Not that it should have mattered to me anyway, but I couldn't help but feel slightly pissed off at the thought of seeing him having his hands all over her. I didn't know what it was that had her stuck on my mind lately, but it felt like whenever she was I just kept going back to that stupid kiss. A kiss that was nothing more but a kiss. Something I'd done thousands of times before. It wasn't anything special, _she_ wasn't anything special, and the whole thing was ridiculous to even think too much about. So, why couldn't I ignore it? Why couldn't I keep a straight face whenever I thought back to it? Why did I feel _this_ strange whenever I thought about the dweeb? None of it made sense, and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't find a logical explanation to the insanity of it all. These thoughts of her just kept rushing back to me, disobeying my control every time, so why. . .

 ** _Why wouldn't it stop?_**


	26. Chapter 25: Trust No One

Chapter 25: Trust No One

Jinx

The halls were crowded in the morning, filled with preoccupied teens preparing to step into their first period classrooms. My existence only proved to be of an annoyance to those who made the effort to actually notice me walking toward my locker. The hateful glares, whispers, and occasional trips were just another reminder of how much they wanted me gone. I knew that, I've always known, but today didn't seem to matter. Nothing they did could be any worse than the encounter I had faced the other night, and all I could think about was the annoying do-gooder linked to my past. . .

 _"I'm sorry. . . I should have done something, I should have tried harder to find you, this is all my fault. That's why I can't stand by and watch you fall apart even more!"_

"Idiot." I whispered to myself and tried to ignore the thoughts of him swarming around in my head. It didn't matter what he thought of me, or the risk's I'd need to take in order to achieve my goal, but what really ticked me off was the fact that he actually believed he was the cause for any of this. My life had been cursed from the moment I was born, and that had nothing to do with that moron. That's why I couldn't understand how he could convince himself that he was the center point for everything that went wrong in my life. My decisions, my actions, were made by me and me alone. I never once did anything with the thought of him, that's why I didn't get it. . .

It just didn't make any sense.

"Rose. . ." A voice and a pat on the shoulder caught my attention, forcing me to look at the only person on campus I never wanted to see.

"What do you want, Linda?" I spoke in a tone that made her nervous. I was annoyed by her presence after the many times I'd warned her to stay away from me, and now she had me questioning whether she was dumber than I'd originally thought. . .

"I was hoping we could hang out after school sometime to talk? I know you might be busy but if you're going to homecoming we could probably -"

"No." That was all I needed to say before I reached the comfort of my own locker.

"Rose, please, you can't keep pushing me away like this."

"Why can't I?" I began to laugh, "Wasn't that what you did to me? Push me so far away to the point where you wouldn't need to worry about me anymore in order live freely on your own?"

"That wasn't. . ." She stammered, preparing to defend herself, "It wasn't my fault, okay? they wouldn't let me -"

"I don't care anymore." Her face fell in despair, but I refused to hold back in slicing down every shred of hope she carried. This was something she needed to understand, something she had to accept, because we weren't children anymore. We couldn't go back to the way it was before, even if we tried. It was impossible, because the girl she was searching for wasn't me and it never could be. . .

"Adams!" Another irritating voice rushed to join us, belonging to the only guy on campus I had truly dreaded to face again. It was difficult enough to appear calm and collected simply watching him approach us, but I felt it'd be an almost impossible task to speak to the redhead for more than a second. Even though I was well aware of the fact that what we did never meant anything, judging by how he'd done far more with half the female students on campus, I also knew there was no point in giving the whole thing another thought. Especially since the one he truly came over for wasn't me. . .

But _Her. . ._

"Wally!" Linda smiled, waving to him until he finally reached us. They looked at each other for a moment, clearly flirting with their eyes, and I figured the best move for me would be to leave them be. That's all I could do anyway. . .

"Okay, then, we're done here." I dismissed myself, reached for my books, and shutting my locker door before I decided to leave. That was, until, they had each grabbed onto one of my arms and yanked me back to where I stood.

"Wait!" They yelled simultaneously, gripping onto my arms to stop me from leaving.

"Seriously!" Annoyed with their actions, I took my book and smacked them both to be released, "Why does everyone keep touching me!?"

"Ow!" They both cried out.

"Oh cry me a river." I scoffed, pushing my book into my bag.

"Isn't she just refreshing to be around," The redhead joked, turning to Linda in trying to make her laugh with his sarcasm, "I need to talk to you." He said to me, rubbing his head to ease the pain.

"So, talk?"

"But Rose -" Linda tried to speak again.

"We're done talking." I told the girl, refusing to acknowledge her presence any longer by looking at her for another second.

"What's going on with you two?" The redhead asked us, his eyes moving from me to her to find an answer.

"Nothing." Linda tried to smile before looking back up at West, "I'll see you later." She switched back to her usual self in front of the boy, the two smiling at each other for another awkward moment after saying her goodbyes and retreating back down the halls alone.

"What's the real story there?" He looked down at me, "What were you two talking about before?"

"Just like what she said; Nothing." I shrugged, staring down at the ground to avoid facing him.

"If you say so," I heard him say before he knelt down to catch my gaze, making me blanch at his strange behavior, "Listen, I wanted to clear the air about yesterday -"

"I thought we agreed to never speak of it again." I reminded the idiot and turned away from him in fear he'd see my face blush in embarrassment at the memory of it.

"I know, but I wanted to make sure that -"

"That what? I wouldn't tell anyone? Hold it against you?" I laughed, "Or were you worried I'd fall for you like every other girl on campus you've locked lips with?"

The redhead began to fidget at my accusations, "I uh. . ."

"Thought so," I shook my head at him, "Calm down, West. There's no way I'd ever be interested in a guy like you." I assured him, and took my chance to leave again only to be stopped by him running over to block me from taking another step.

"What are you saying? A guy like what?"

"West, just drop it -"

"No, say what you're thinking. That's what you normally do anyway, right?" He sounded almost offended by what I'd said, despite being aware of what I, and the whole school, thought and knew about the him.

"Why are you even here, West? To pick another fight? Because I'm really not in the mood today." I sighed, looking at him with apprehension until the anger in his eyes subsided.

"No, I just. . ." He groaned loudly, looking around for a moment before continuing, "I just don't want things to be weird between us. I meant what I said before, I really do like spending time with you. It's frustrating at times, but refreshing to talk to someone different. That's why I didn't want to wreck it because of what happened back there."

My eyes darted away from him and focused on the ground again. Silence was emitted between us and I couldn't help but feel slightly amused at the redhead's words. Not that I cared for him or anything, that was just ridiculous, but I thought it was nice to be needed by someone just for company. Even though he was an idiot, he wasn't all that bad of a guy. He was just. . . different.

"I get it, okay? Let's just drop the whole thing and pretend it never happened." I suggested, watching the redhead turn to me with bright blue eyes.

"Really?" He smiled widely.

"Yeah, whatever." I laughed lightly, brushing past him to head to class.

"So, you coming to the game tonight?" He asked, following beside me.

"Game?" I quirked a brow.

"Yeah, the homecoming game?"

"But I thought homecoming was tomorrow?" I asked, glancing up at him for a moment.

"Well yeah, but the game's set for tonight."

"So the game's tonight, but the dance is tomorrow. . .?" I thought out loud, "That makes no sense. Why not just make them on the same day?"

"I don't know ask the principal." He gave up on answering, confused by it all himself after questioning it on his own for a moment, "So, you going?" He eagerly asked again.

"Probably not." I said, only to be shoved lightly by the redhead.

"Why not?" He whined, "You'll miss me in my glory when I win tonight."

"How are you so sure you'll win?" I asked, somewhat curious at what he had to say.

"Just a feeling." He said confidently, as if he knew nothing else would stop him from bringing the team to victory or risk letting them down, "You're really not going to come?" He asked again.

"We'll see." I shrugged, smiling up at the redhead who appeared displeased with my answer.

"Tease." He pouted.

"Pest."

"Hey!" He laughed, playfully pushing me away which brought me to softly smile. There were many bad qualities that made up the great _Wally West_ , but it was during moments like these that made me almost grateful to be on such good terms with the idiot. Even though he was a threat to my social life on campus, I'd be lying if I kept telling myself I didn't care for him at all, because I did. Maybe not in the same way the other females did, but there were definitely some form of feelings I held for the redhead.

I'd never let him know that though. . .

"Oh, yeah. I forgot to ask before, but what's your number?"

"My number?" I tilted my head to one side.

"Yeah, your cell number. It's a lot easier to make plans to study and stuff if we can contact each other whenever we want." He explained, taking out his phone and bringing me to stop in panic.

"Oh. . ." I laughed nervously, thinking of some form of lie to get me out of answering, but after a few seconds I realized there was only one answer I could get away with in this situation, "I don't have a phone."

"Why not?" He squinted, placing his phone back in his pocket.

"I can't afford it, I don't need it, it's a bother to carry around - there are tons of reasons."

"But what if you get kidnapped or something?" The nonsense he spouted only made me laugh. The idea that anyone would ever try to lay a hand on me, _jinx_ , was ridiculous to even bother thinking about. If he only knew. . .

"I can take care of myself."

"So you say, but you can't compare the pushing and shoving on campus to a deranged psycho who could do all sorts of thing's to you before burying you in a desert." He flailed his arms around, trying to get his point across for my own sake.

"Please, there's nothing anyone can do to hurt me anymore."

"They could murder you? Chop you up into little pieces or burn you alive -"

"You watch way too many horror flicks." I looked up at the redhead exaggerating different scenarios in his head.

"No you just watch too little," He paused, "I'm serious though, there are some pretty sick people out there." He tried to warn.

"Trust me, I know." I nodded, quickening my pace to end the conversation before it could escalate to something far worse.

"I don't think you do," He rushed to keep up, "They could seriously hurt you. They could torture you, sell you, rape you- "

"Shut up!" I screamed, covering my ears from that word. I dreaded the mention of the foul word that held such a deep meaning. If it was never spoken, then it never existed, that was how it worked in my mind. I wouldn't accept it, I couldn't, and I hated anyone who dared speak of it in my presence. It wasn't real and it never was, just a dream - a nightmare.

It never happened.

 _"We're just going to play a little game, that's all."_

 _"Be a good little girl. . ."_

"Adam's?" A rough shake brought me out of my trance, and I looked up to find two blue eyes looking back at mine, "You okay?" The redhead asked, concerned while gripping my shoulders.

"Y-Yeah. . ." I cleared my throat, stepping back from the boy.

"Did I say something wrong?" He tried stepping forward.

"No." I shook my head and forced a laugh, "I just feel a little sick, that's all."

"You seemed fine earlier?" He questioned my response, eyeing me suspiciously, "Did you. . ." He paused again, trying to gather his words, "What did you mean there's nothing they could do to hurt you anymore?"

My eyes grew wide in shock at how quickly he had caught on, "N-Nothing." I smiled, trying to keep eye contact while keeping up a cool composure.

"Did someone. . ." He tried to ask, to piece together his theory, and he probably would have figured it out to if a certain blonde hadn't appeared.

"Oh there you two are!" The bimbo known as Stacy came strutting over, catching everyone's attention after approaching us.

"Stacy!" The redhead tried to appear overjoyed at seeing the girl, "Shouldn't you be heading to class in the opposite direction?" He smiled, hiding the annoyance he truly felt at having her around.

"I was, but I wanted to see you first and show you something interesting the girls caught on camera. . ." The blonde grinned evilly, taking out her phone and holding it up for us to see after pressing play on a video she had stored. I'd expected it to be of the first encounter I had with her, or any encounter with the bullies on campus, something to make me look bad in front of the redhead as means of revenge from stealing her 'Wally'. . . But I was wrong.

Instead, the camera was pointed facing a tree in the beginning. The sound of laughter buzzing in occasionally until the camera was brought down and zoomed in on a figure standing in the distance. It wasn't hard to see that the redheaded boy in the video was none other than West, standing by a park bench and chatting with another beside him. When I saw him pull on the girl standing next to him I knew exactly how this video would end, and why the blonde had been so eager to show us what she had stored on her phone.

The look on the redheads face was painted with nothing but fear after watching the kiss. I watched the girl carefully, smiling as if she'd beaten me at a game I wanted no part in. It seemed all she was interested in was winning him over, to keep him for herself by locking him away from everyone else, even if that meant harming him in anyway. . .

And that really ticked me off.

"You like?" She laughed, putting her phone down, "I think it's one of our best shots yet, don't you think?" She turned to me, clearly referring to the last video her friends had taken of me in the girls room.

"Why are you doing this?" I tried to ask the girl, but all she did was grin at me before turning over to the redhead.

"You know, I thought it was weird that you guys had been spending so much time together. But honestly, Wally, do you actually prefer someone like her over me?"

"Stacy, it's not what it looked like -"

"Then what was it!?" She yelled, bringing every individual in the hall to stop and stare at the three of us.

"Stacy, listen," I started, "The whole thing was just a big -"

"She kissed me!" He shouted with everyone trying to listen in, "I stopped it, she initiated it, that's all it was." I gazed up at the redhead who spouted such cruel accusations with the thought of only saving himself.

"But in the video -"

"C'mon stace," He cut her off, "You know I would never do something like that on my own. She's a dweeb with an obsession of me. . ." He stopped for a moment and glanced over at me, clearly making no effort to protect me from the blonde's wrath, "There's no way I'd ever try anything like that when I have you." He flashed his stupid smile at the girl, winning her over in seconds flat, and placing his arm around her to convince everyone his lies were true.

"I knew it." She smiled up at the teen before the flames in her eyes were directed towards me, "You just can't take a hint can you, freak?"

I opened my mouth to say something, to expose the redhead once and for all after his betrayal. I could have easily spoken out and said something, but the fear in his eyes struck me silent. My record may speak differently, but I wasn't a bad person. I could never betray someone as easily as he did, not even for all the jewels in the world, because trust was something truly important to me. However, that didn't mean it was the same for everyone else - including him. If I ruined his reputation I'd gain nothing but guilt, and even if I tried there was no guarantee anyone would believe me. My only option left was to play along. . .

And that's what I did.

"I guess not." I grinned, trying to go along with the image the redhead had created for me now.

"You little. . ." She came at me quickly, pushing me hard against the locker and letting me drop to the floor.

"Hey, hey, wait a sec!" He tried to intervene, grabbing the blonde by the wrist, "You don't need to go that far."

"What? Are you defending her now?" The blonde stood by confused and offended by the boys actions.

"No, but -"

"You should just stay out of it West. . ." I laughed, staring up at the redhead watching me in guilt, "I deserve this right, Stacy?" I returned my attention to the girl who knelt down to get closer.

"Shut up, freak!" She commanded, slapping me hard across the face, "You want to keep playing this little game, then fine!" She threw me onto the ground and held me down with her foot on my back.

"Get off of me!" I yelled, trying to fight back until her little army of followers approached us from behind.

"Bottle!" The blonde snapped her fingers and was handed a bottle of water by her gang. The entire school began to cheer her on, a crowd piling around us to watch and join in on the torture of _Rose Adams_.

It had been just like I'd expected. I could never be fortunate enough to live a decent life as Rose Adams, she was the one who was truly cursed - not jinx. The villainous leader of the Hive Five was the escape to all of this, she held the power, and no one dared speak down to her. I had never done anything to any of these people, most of them didn't even know my name, yet they took part in the cruel fate I'd been destined to live if I had never been reborn. The best option for me was to call it quits now, destroy every being in these halls and never return. . . but I couldn't do it. Despite the misery of this life, it was still part of me. This was the true me, the real me, and I never wanted to lose that again. Even if that meant putting myself in harms way. I didn't want to let it go. . .

Not Again.

"This is what happens to thirsty bitches that try to challenge me!" She announced after opening the bottle. The school roared as she held it up in the air, laughing with all the others. My eyes watched each of them carefully, their smiles, and grins, easily entertained like fools. They nearly all had the same expression on their face, all of them, except for a certain redhead who watched me in the background. The words 'I'm Sorry' were mouthed in secret, but I paid no attention to them because of what little meaning it held. I didn't matter to him, I never did, and I was a fool to think I could ever trust him from the start. . .

My body was soon met with a cool splash of the water she poured over me. She had finally given the crowd what they wanted, and not a soul dared to stop her. I was soaked on the floor, later hit by the empty bottle she finished before setting me free. A quick kick in the stomach was all that was left before she allowed me to find the strength to get back up and leave.

I ran, and I kept running without ever looking back. I pushed past every being in the halls, taunting me, and trying to harm me in anyway possible. The pain, embarrassment, betrayal, abandonment, and loneliness called upon every negative emotion within me and swallowed what little hope I had left for those here. But I wouldn't let them see me cry, I wouldn't let them break me down, because I'd gone through far worse and survived. These people meant nothing to me, not one, and especially not West. I made the mistake in confiding in him for a moment and that was my own fault. I should have known better then to have gotten attached to someone like him. This was my punishment and it finally woke me up to the truth, but that didn't mean they'd win. I wasn't going to quit for their sake, and I'd keep fighting until I couldn't fight anymore. That was my decision. . .

 **And I would honor it until the end.**


	27. Chapter 26: Homecoming Pt: I

Chapter 26: Homecoming Pt. I

Kid Flash

There was a mirror in the room. A mirror that had stood in the corner for years. A mirror I had faced every morning and every night to view the person that existed within it. A simple task for any being on earth, whether you admired or despised the image it reflected, it was still something everyone was capable of doing - it should be at least.

The star athlete, last night's victorious winner, and the school's _king_ should have had no problem in facing himself. There may have been moments I dreaded the person I saw looking back at me, but I could at least stand proud half of the time with who I was and the great things I've done. . . but today was different.

I was different.

I stood there watching myself for hours after I'd gotten home the other day, then again after winning the big game, even when I woke up this morning, and now again. I'd been staring at my reflection ever since my last run in with the Adam's girl, trying to hate myself or make the situation sound better in my head than it actually was. I did everything to face up to who I was and accept it. . . but I couldn't. I couldn't do it, no matter how many times I tried, because whenever I looked at myself I felt nothing. Not admiration or shame - just nothing. . .

Because I didn't recognize myself anymore.

This wasn't me, I wasn't trying to get anyone in trouble, and I never wanted anyone to get hurt. I'd been stuck between a rock and a hard place for so long, forced to decide between two people I couldn't disappoint. I figured if I chose Stacy then she would have backed off and dropped the whole thing. I never planned for Rose to get hurt, I thought I was protecting her. I didn't think she'd care about what the school had to say, judging by what they already thought of her, but if I had known she'd get hurt I never would have. . .

But that's lie.

Even if she was at risk there was no way I would have been able to go against Stacy. It was out of my control and I didn't have any other choice. . . but that's no excuse. I couldn't end the fear I held in what they'd think of me if I ever went against their image of me, but I never thought the cost would be losing someone like Adams. She wasn't like the other girls, or guys, on campus. She was easy to talk to and understood me on a level no one else could, and all I'd done was toss her to the side to save my own ass. How was I going to face her tonight? Would she even have the guts to show up at the dance? Would that guy even want to be seen with her after that?

Wait, is that really such a bad thing?

 _"You should just stay out of it West. I deserve this. . ."_

What was I thinking? I shouldn't be trying to make myself feel better after that. She wasn't just some dweeb, she was a friend and she trusted me - I'm sure she did. And it didn't help that she looked almost exactly like jinx, either. Pretending it never happened this time and trying to move past it was impossible at this point. I felt sick even thinking back on it, watching her lay there in front of the entire school like an animal the blonde had tried to tame. She didn't deserve that, no one did, and especially not someone like her. She was just like jinx, broken, and all I'd done was watch them tear her apart even more. And even though I never would have admitted it to her, I'd be lying if I said I didn't care about her at all. If it wasn't Adam's it was jinx, and if it wasn't jinx it was Adams. The two were always on my mind, making me question my own feelings. There was no choosing between them, and even if I tried the universe seemed to forbid me from seeing either of them. . .

And that pissed me off.

"Hey Wally~" My aunt sang from the door, snapping a picture of me the moment I looked over.

"Seriously, Aunt I." I sighed, trying to snatch the camera from her hand, "I'm trying to get ready."

"I need these for memories. Besides, I never get to see you in a tux." She said, keeping the camera away from me to continue taking more shots of me in my tuxedo. She ran from me at any time I attempted to stop her, her childish behavior making me laugh until I gave up in chasing her out.

"You need to act your age." I breathed, shaking my head at the woman snapping away.

"Make me, grandpa!" She stuck her tongue out and took one last shot before she placed the camera away, "Okay, okay, I'm done now. So, how you feeling?" She asked enthusiastically.

"Fine, I guess." I simply said, walking over to sit on my bed.

"Just fine? It's the first dance of the year. Why aren't you excited?" She asked before sitting beside me.

"There's just a lot on my mind." I shrugged, "I just want to get it over with already."

"Hey," She nudged my elbow, "Talk to me. What's going on?" She asked, watching me with big green eyes.

The silence I'd created in the room lasted for a few moments by my refusal to speak and her stubbornness in dropping the question. I laid back on my bed to think about what I'd done and how I was going to fix it? I wasn't sure if talking about it would change anything, and I didn't want to say too much or risk upsetting my aunt. She already disliked the crimefighting, and the occasional hook ups that I'd bring in and out of the house, but if I told her about what went on in those halls she'd never look at me the same way anymore. I was already broken enough in her eyes. . . but there was one thing I was curious to understand. Something she might have an answer to in clearing up my own feelings. . .

"Aunt I, do you think it's possible to love two people at the same time?" I asked the woman who watched me for a long moment. I couldn't read her thoughts but she was definitely caught off guard by my question. I wasn't sure what she was thinking right then and there, but I'm sure there were numerous ideas that flooded her mind after asking such a question. . .

"Well. . ." She laid back down with me, staring up at the ceiling before continuing, "I think it's possible. I don't think it's fair, but there are a lot of things in life that aren't." Her answer surprised me. I'd never expected to hear that from the happily married woman who'd been blessed with living out her years with her first love.

"Then, if that happens, how do you decide?" I asked, looking at her as she slowly turned her head to stare back at me.

"You don't." She smiled.

"What do you mean?" I furrowed my brows, confused by her words after her previous answer.

"It's unfair to love two people at the same time, so the only option is to let them go. That way it's fair on everyone."

"That doesn't seem fair for the one caught between the two." I muttered, turning my eyes away from her.

"Well if it's unfair for the one in love with the two, and it's unfair for the other two who love that one person, then the only way to make it fair would be to walk away." She tried to explain before sitting back up, "Of course, you could choose to play unfairly by picking between them, or even have them both, but in the end everyone would get hurt. The only way to save each other is to walk away."

"That. . . makes sense." I hated to admit, knowing very well that she was right. I knew I couldn't have jinx, it'd never work and if it did it wouldn't matter because she'd never forgive me. I also knew that whatever feelings that had slowly formed for the Adam's girl didn't matter either, because there was no way she'd ever speak to me again after what I'd done.

I messed up and this was my punishment. . .

"Why do you ask?" She looked back at me.

"No reason. . ." I forced a laugh, pushing myself off the bed to leave when a sudden knock on the door caught our attention.

"Wally -" My Uncle came through the door, "You have a visitor."

"Visitor? Who?" I asked after he stepped aside to reveal my date standing behind him. She walked in with a sweet smile and a soft blush. She had on a long dark blue dress that faded to a lighter color at the end. She wore a pair of white heels and her hair was placed in a bun, allowing everyone to get a better look at her flawless face. Anyone that spotted her would have probably fallen hard the moment they gazed into those doughy eyes of hers. She was beautiful, stunning and perfect in every way. . . but all I could think about was Rose. Would she really show up tonight? What would she look like? Would she hate me? Would she accept my apology?

Was it really all over for us?

"Linda. . ." I walked over, "I thought I was suppose to pick you up?"

"I wanted to surprise you. One of the guys on the team mentioned where you lived at the party last time, and I thought it'd be fun if I came over instead." She smiled innocently, looking over my shoulder to wave at my aunt, "Hello, Miss's West. It's so nice to meet you." She kindly greeted.

"How'd you get here?" I asked, blocking my aunt's figure to keep the girls attention on me.

"Oh, I took a bus." She simply said.

"A bus!?" I gaped at her, "How could you take a bus this late? And dressed like that? What if something had happened to you!?"

"But nothing did, and I always take the bus wherever I go so it's fine." She kept smiling with a confident mind that seemed to have convinced her nothing could ever harm her at any moment in time. . .

"Alright, we'll leave you two alone." My uncle said, walking over to the bed to pull my aunt out of the room, "You guys have fun tonight." He looked at us before they left the room.

"I guess we should probably head out already." I told the girl and opened the door for us to leave only to have her shut it back to keep us in.

"Yeah, but I wanted to ask you something first. . ." She sounded hesitant, pondering on something serious in her head.

"What is it?" I asked the girl who appeared nervous to speak again.

"S-Some of the kids recorded yesterdays incident. . . and posted it online. . . " She looked up at me and inhaled deeply, "I want to know what happened? I thought the two of you were friends, or somewhat close, but you just stood there and let them do all of that stuff to her without trying to stop it. Why didn't you -"

"What exactly is going on between the two of you?" I had to ask, curious to know what the two of them were hiding whenever they were alone.

Linda stared at me, baffled by my question, and began to back away after removing her hand from the door. "Nothing's going on -"

"Are you into her or something? Like, are you guys a thing? Because I don't judge -"

"What!?" She yelled, her strong reaction making me jump, "You think I'm a _lesbian_? Why would you assume that!?" She asked scornfully, clearly repulsed by my accusation.

"I don't know? You seemed pretty obsessed with her, and you were asking about her before, plus you two seemed to know each other or something -"

"And that makes me _gay_?" She shook her head at me, "There's no way anything like that could ever go on between me and Rose, okay? I'm straight, Wally. Why else would I have agreed to go to the dance with you?" She folded her arms on her chest, pouting slightly.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it as a bad thing. I just didn't know what else to think about the two of you. . ." I tried to explain, praying the situation would fix itself and she'd return to her usual state.

"It's complicated. . ." She sighed, looking to the floor before returning to meet my gaze, "But you need to apologize to her. I wasn't there to help her, but you were and you couldn't even do that much." She lectured, telling me everything I already knew.

"You're right. . ." I agreed, my fear returning at the thought of what I'd need to say if I saw the other girl tonight, "I'll apologize." I nodded, letting out a deep sigh and expecting more criticism from Linda until she made the attempt to step forward and take my hand.

"Really?" She locked her fingers with mine, smiling up at me with hopeful eyes.

"Yeah." I nodded, smiling down at the girl who stepped closer to lean in. Her eyes slowly shut, signaling her true intentions, as she stood waiting for me to move in. I wasn't going to refuse her, I couldn't when she looked that beautiful, this was something any guy would have wanted.

I placed my hands around her waist and pulled her in to capture her lips. She seemed eager to keep it going, kissing me back and wrapping her arms around my neck to keep me close. She tried deepening the kiss, and I didn't fight against it, but she seemed to be the only one interested in all of it. I wanted to feel something, to explore and go even further with the girl because I did _like_ her, at least more than the others. She was beautiful and sweet, but that's all there was to her.

Maybe it was because I didn't know that much about her, or maybe because I'd already been swept away by someone else, but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't feel anything more for her. This kiss was like any other, and those couldn't compare to the one I'd briefly exchanged with a certain dweeb at the park.

I pushed her away gently and faced the opposite direction, "We should, uh, get going already. . ." I cleared my throat, staring awkwardly at the door before she opened it.

"You're right. You'll be missed if you don't show up." She smiled, taking my hand and pulling me out of the room to leave.

This was it, no turning back now, the moment I'd step back into that school I'd be risking having to see _her_ again. I messed up, I knew that, and Linda knew it too, but I had no idea what I'd do if she showed up. That was the only way out of it, but if she ended being a no show I'd only feel worse about myself than I already did. I had to apologize and make up for what I did somehow, no matter how scared I was. I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I couldn't even earn her forgiveness first. That meant no more running, and facing the situation head on. I wasn't going to give up half way this time, and I wasn't going to fail someone else again, I was going to fix this no matter the cost because I couldn't live with myself if. . .

 **If I lost her too.**


	28. Chapter 27: Homecoming Pt: II

Chapter 27: Homecoming Pt. II

Jinx

I stared into a shattered image through smooth glass. The mirror was in perfect condition, but the image of the stranger staring back at me had been distorted. My eyes occasionally flickering to my naked neck that had been decorated with the pendant I carried for years.

 _"You don't need to hurt people to feel good about yourself."_

I knew that, I'd known that for a long time now, but why was I the one being lectured on how to treat people when the world seemed to behave much crueler than I ever did. I never hurt people for the fun of it, it was always for a purpose. Maybe there were times I got caught up in the moment and took advantage of my criminal status. But it wasn't for nothing, I did it to improve our ranking, so that we could earn a powerful title where the world would have no choice but to cower and obey our every command. . . but I wasn't a bad person.

Unlike _Wally_ _West_.

Everything he'd done was out selfishness. He focused on satisfying himself even if that meant watching others get hurt. I was a fool to believe he could be anything more than the greedy animal he'd always been. He may have won the last round, but I wouldn't let him, or his crew of snobs, break me down anymore. I wasn't going to run away, even if it meant putting my own safety at risk. They could hit me, taunt me, and spill water on me all they wanted - but I wasn't going to back down this time. I wouldn't let them think even for a second that I feared them, because I didn't. Not even the devil himself could chase me away this time, because I wasn't going to let anyone control me any longer. I wasn't their toy or their pet, which meant they couldn't tame me even if they wanted to. . .

I tried making my appearance at least somewhat presentable. The silky purple gown I had on fit me nicely, and the black heels were a great match, despite being hidden underneath my dress. But it wasn't the clothes that were the problem, they were fine, but the stringy wig was difficult to style in anything other than my usual braids. The glasses also needed to be worn in order to make my brown contact lenses appear more natural. However, my skin was the bigger issue with how much paler it had gotten, and I had this awful feeling that if I went to the dance looking this way I'd only become a bigger laughingstock on campus. . .

But I didn't care.

I couldn't back down now, no matter how ridiculous I'd look in their eyes. My appearance wasn't something I could control, but how I presented myself in front of them was something I _could_. I wasn't going to let them belittle me anymore. I wanted to prove to these people that I wouldn't shy away from anything they threw at me, whether it'd be punches or insults, I could take it. I'd been taking it for as long as I could remember, and they were nothing compared to the demons I'd encountered in the past. . .

Not even close.

"Jinx!" Seymour's voice called from the other side of my door, knocking for me to let him in.

"Coming." I told him, smoothing out the end of my dress before I walked over to give him access to enter. The door slid open after I'd placed my hand on the security panel and allowed the one eyed teen to finally step inside.

"You have to come with me, we're all going to watch. . ." His invitation was cut short after noticing my appearance, "What are you wearing?" He asked, trying not to laugh in fear of what he knew I'd do to him if he dared to make fun of me.

"I'm going out." I said, walking back to my bed to grab a small bag that kept my communicator safe.

"Where?" He followed me, watching me approach the mirror again to fix my frizzy wig.

"The school's dance tonight. I promised someone I'd go with them. . ." I hadn't realized how my explanation would affect him until I saw the saddened expression on his face in the mirror. I could have left that last part out, but instead I made the situation worse by slipping up all over again.

"Jinx. . ." He grabbed my wrist and pulled me back, spinning me over to keep me from avoiding to face him, "Where exactly do we stand?" He tightened his fingers on me.

"Seymour, it's not what you think."

"Then what is it?" He asked right away, "You said you wanted to be with me, but it doesn't feel like anything's changed with you."

"What do you want me to do Seymour?" I tried pulling away, not wanting to fall into another heated argument.

"I want you to be honest with me!"

"I am being honest!" I yelled, furious with his ridiculous behavior of wanting my attention every second of every day, "I already chose you Seymour, you know that! I don't know how else to prove that to you!" I shoved him away and released myself from his grip. I wasn't going to deal with this anymore because I knew I'd regret it later if I said something that would hurt him. The only option for me was to leave, to walk away now while we still had a chance to cool down. . . but he didn't let it end there.

He'd snapped like every other man on this planet by accidentally revealing his true nature. My body was forced down on the bed without being given a say before he laid himself on top of me. His lips were roughly forced over mine, ignoring my demands, with eyes taking me in and devouring me. His hands travelled up my dress and I could feel his body pressing against me, groping me, while holding me down against my will.

"Seymour stop!" I screamed, begging him to release me but received no reply. I could feel the sparks in my fingers ready to hex him straight into oblivion. I wanted nothing more but for it to be over, yet I couldn't find the strength to hurt him. I didn't have the strength to do something like that to someone I cared about, or to someone I knew cared for me. I also knew this was just his way of trying to own me, keep me caged away like everyone else. It wasn't brought on to hurt me, judging by his trembling touch. . .

This wasn't what he wanted, it wasn't planned like the others. Still, I had no choice but to treat him like them in a situation like this. To go back to the teachings of our former caretaker in obedience. One must remain silent in the dark room, stay still, and do not resist. Sink into the darkness until you've slipped away for the time being. It was simple, almost like a game, all one needed to do. . .

Was play dead.

"Don't do that. . ." His voice shook, tears falling down his face as he hovered above me, "Don't you dare shut off on me. . ."

"Isn't this what you wanted? What all of you ever wanted?"

"No!" He screamed, burying his face in my neck, "This isn't it! I just. . . I just didn't know what else to do." His tears spilled over me in guilt and I could feel him shaking after embracing him in my arms.

"I know." I whispered, before he pulled himself off of me and stepped away. He stood in the center of my room, his back facing me the entire time, trying to pull himself back together. This wasn't his fault, it wasn't mine either, it was _theirs_. All these years we'd spent hiding away from the real world, knowing very little on how to interact with those different from our own kind. I had the chance at retaining what little humanity I once carried by returning to the civilian life, but the others had no interest in doing so. That's why they'd become this way. I don't think they even remember what it was like to be human at all at this point.

"I'm leaving." He announced and began heading for the exit.

"Seymour wait!" I tried to go after him, but I froze when he suddenly stopped to glance over his shoulder.

"I want to be alone. . . have fun at the dance tonight." That was all he said before he disappeared down the halls.

I sat on my bed for a few minutes, hugging my knees close to my chest, and giving myself time to ease my trembling heart. I didn't fear Seymour, I never could, but the thought of him being placed in the same category with all the men that had tormented me over the years is what truly scared me. We were family, friends, and even though I couldn't feel anything more than that I would rather give myself to him than to any other. However, that didn't mean I could handle going through that experience again. . .

Not ever.

"Um. . . jinx?" A tiny figure called to me from my doorway.

"Gizmo." I tried to smile, wiping away any tears that dared to fall, "Did you need something?"

"No, I just wanted to let you know the security system has been upgraded. So, you don't have to worry about those cruddy titan's hacking in anymore."

"Oh?" I nodded, getting off the bed and grabbing my bag to leave the room, "Good job, kid." I said, patting his head before stepping out into the hall.

"Wait jinx!" His little hand grabbed onto me, "Are you going somewhere like that?" He pointed at my wig, clearly appalled at my appearance as well.

"Yeah, there's a school dance tonight I need to head to."

"Then you might want this instead." He pulled his backpack off, rummaging through whatever he carried inside, before handing me a plain silver ring.

"What is that?"

"Take off the disguise and see for yourself." The child instructed, and after that I figured there was no point in arguing with the brains of the team.

I walked back into my bedroom, gizmo reaching for my hand to guide me toward the mirror in the corner. I stood in front of my reflection, staring at my ridiculous appearance before my wig was carefully removed from my head. The little genius stood on my bed, shoes off, before yanking my glasses away. I copied his actions and stepped closer to the mirror to remove the contact lenses in my eyes, trying to go along with whatever he had in mind by returning to my original form.

The pink haired, cat eyed, criminal was what stood in front of me now. It was no secret that I despised looking at the monster I'd been morphed into, everyone on the team knew it, and I made no effort in hiding it, but I much rather preferred the jinx version than the Adam's version I disguised myself in everyday. She bored me, and not just in appearance but personality wise as well, she was weak and obedient. A dog in many ways who couldn't fight back for anything. . . Yet I envied the opportunities given to her in the real world. A world that wanted no part of the girl I truly was. . .

"Now put it on!" Gizmo hollered to get my attention, pointing at the small piece of jewelry in my hand. I hesitated at first, wondering the risk's I'd be taking in a device he may not have tested. Still, I couldn't risk revealing my worry in front of the boy and forced myself to do as he said.

The ring slipped on my finger smoothly, a perfect fit, and it suited my dress nicely as well - but I knew that wasn't what it was intended for after I drew my eyes back to the image in the mirror. My once long pink hair was transformed into soft dark waves that flowed gracefully over my shoulders. My pink feline eyes, that most civilians feared, were also replaced by a pair of dark brown ones that watched me in utter shock. Even my sickly pale skin was given more color, along with a natural blush that appeared over my cheeks.

I wasn't perfect, I wasn't trying to be either, and I wasn't the best looking female on this planet either, but that didn't matter anymore - because I was _me_. This was my true form, my _original_ form, the form I would have had if life had treated me differently. I wasn't jinx, or a metahuman anymore, I wasn't anyone else, and I didn't need to pretend to be, I was just me. Something that I'd yearned to see again, someone I'd been curious to view at this age, and now I finally could. . .

Because I was human again.

"How did you. . . ?" I couldn't finish my sentence, fearing that if I did it would all disappear in front of me again. It seemed almost too good to be true. To no longer need a disguise. . .

"It's a holographic generator. I stole the idea from those stupid titans when I saw Cyborg try -"

"Thank you!" I cried, flinging my arms around the boy to hold him. This was more than I could ever ask for, a miracle I thought could never exist in this lifetime, and suddenly everything had fallen perfectly together. Nothing else mattered anymore, not the bullies, the homework, or even the brotherhood of evil. Just this.

"Yeah, yeah -" He muttered, pulling away from my embrace, "It's not something to get all excited about, it has a power inhibitor so you can't use your powers whenever you have it on, but I just thought it would make things easier on you to get ready in the morning and stuff. Besides, it's not like I acted alone - most of it was Seymour."

"Seymour?" I repeated, confused how he could take any part in creating such a device.

"Yeah, he's the one who knows you better than the rest of us. I needed his former description of you to piece this all together. If it weren't for him I might have turned you into someone completely different." He finished explaining, clearly trying to defend the one eyed boy he'd probably seen storm out of my room earlier. It was obvious they'd take his side no matter what I said, because Seymour got along with everyone. He knew how to relate to everyone, how to get them to listen, and how to maintain their trust. He was also the first to defend me whenever someone else spoke out.

A true leader.

I watched the child leave my room, having nothing more to say after standing up for the one eyed teen who was no longer in the area. I knew I needed to fix things somehow, not just with the team, but with Seymour as well. I had no right to hurt him after all he'd done to keep us together. And after giving me back my own identity, the least I could do was become his for good. After all, there was no such thing as true freedom in this universe. You could either own or be owned, and if I had a say in who could keep me caged in this life it'd be him. It had to be.

Tonight I would go to that dance. I would face everyone who despised me. I would enjoy the night with or without my date and prove to them I was no coward. Then I'd come home and apologize to Seymour once and for all. I'd be honest and finally prove to him that nothing else mattered to me but this family. Not the school, the brotherhood of evil, or the bullies on campus - and especially not _Wally West_. Tonight I'd need to bury all of that and not let it destroy what truly mattered to me. I had to. . .

 **Or I'd have nothing left.**


	29. Chapter 28: Homecoming Pt: III

Chapter 28: Homecoming Pt. III

Kid Flash

We stood in the center of the gym, lights flashing in different shades and colors, surrounded by moving bodies busy dancing and laughing. Their eyes watched us from every corner, chatting and gossiping like they normally did on campus.

I tried focusing on the girl dancing in front of me. To distract myself from falling back into the storm rising in my head. It wasn't the dance that was the problem, it wasn't Linda, or the rest of the school. It was me. That's what I kept going back to in my head no matter the hours that passed. I didn't need to be part of this, I didn't need to keep pretending, or keep up with the dumb jock role, and I could've made a difference when the school decided to turn the Adam's girl into this huge freak. . . I could have done something. I could have. . . should have. . .

But I didn't.

"Are you okay?" Linda tried breaking through my thoughts, tugging at my sleeve to keep my attention on her.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I lied, forcing a smile to stop her from worrying, "I guess I'm just tired of dancing." I shrugged, and searched around the room for an empty table to sit by.

"It's not that shocking. After winning yesterday's game I had a feeling you'd be exhausted. I'm just glad you had the energy to even come out with me tonight."

"And leave a girl like you hanging? What kind of guy do you think I am?" I joked and reached down to take her hand. It didn't seem like the Adam's girl would be showing up tonight, or any time soon. Part of me felt relieved that I wouldn't need to face her just yet, that way I could keep up with the act, but a bigger part of me felt worse then yesterday to have been partly responsible for her absence.

The guilt wouldn't leave until I apologized - no, it wouldn't go away until she _forgave_ me. That way I'd at least be able to sleep better at night. But if she couldn't give me that. . .

I'd never be able to move past it.

"Why don't we go sit down for a while?" I suggested, pointing over at a table in the far corner where fewer people would notice us.

"Sure, but I'm going to get something to drink first. Want anything?"

"No thanks. I'll just meet you over there." I told her before we separated.

The night didn't seem like it'd get any better. The music pounding in my head, the girls giving me heartbroken stares, and the guys calling out my name just to impress their dates - all of it was just starting to irritate me. My body ached of exhaustion and all my thoughts were in a jumble because of one stupid thing. Or better yet, one specific dweeb. I just wanted it to end, but I didn't want to just walk out on Linda after how considerate she'd been about the whole thing. I was already behaving like a crummy date, the last thing I wanted to do was disappoint her anymore. But still, being around these people so often made my IQ drop by fifteen percent every time, and I didn't know how much longer I'd last here.

In all honesty, my original purpose for coming out was to keep my promise to Linda, but I only wanted to show up because I hoped I'd see Rose again. . . but that didn't happen. And as minutes ticked away I grew more and more anxious with not having her around, even though I knew she wouldn't make an appearance at this point. . .

Why would she?

"Who the hell's that?" One of the barbies minions gasped after passing me by, and suddenly the room fell silent. No one said anything for a while, no one made a move, but the music kept on playing. I found it odd to see everyone standing frozen like statues, and I figured they were all probably watching one of the teachers scolding some idiot who managed to piss someone off. A fight, a prank, or something stupid like that. . . but there was nothing. There wasn't any yelling or screaming, it was just quiet. I didn't get what they were doing, what they were staring at, or what was going on that would bring every being in the gym to react that way. . .

Until I saw it.

A purple gown flowing elegantly by the entrance of the gym caught everyone's attention. A fair skinned beauty with dark wavy hair watched us from the door way before stepping inside. No one would have recognized who she was, not even me, if it hadn't been for those shimmering brown eyes glaring angrily at anyone that caught her gaze. And it took me only seconds to figure out that the elegant swan standing there was none other than the little duckling I'd been searching for. It was shocking to see how breathtakingly beautiful she'd become in just one night, and for a moment it felt as if everything and everyone had finally disappeared. Leaving only me, her, and the betrayal that drove her away. . .

"Adams?" Someone whispered in the crowd, and suddenly the room was buzzing with chatter. It took me a moment to find the courage to move again, to breathe and speak, but once I did I raced right over to confront her. Knowing very well that if I couldn't get to her first, then the school's Barbie would certainly come rushing over to keep the Adam's girl from taking another step inside.

"Adams!" I called out to her through the heavy vibrations of the music nearly burying my voice, pushing past the crowd to reach her before anyone else, praying my chance wouldn't be wrecked if I couldn't make it on time. But once my voice reached her I felt a painful twinge in my chest after she spotted me. The look in her eyes showed hints of anger at first, but that was all wiped away in seconds after she'd returned to her usual blank expression. I feared taking another step, knowing very well what would happen when we spoke. She couldn't even find the energy to look upset or hurt, because it didn't seem like she even cared at all. I was prepared for the yelling, the beatings, or the tears. . . but not this!

"Wally West." She acknowledged my presence calmly, her odd behavior making everything inside me tremble.

"Adams. . ." I breathed, stopping a few feet in front of her, "What's with the full name this time?" I tried to laugh, glancing back to make sure no one had tried to approach us.

"That _is_ your name, isn't it? Now if you'll please excuse me." She nodded, and gently brushed passed me to head in with everyone else, no doubt to search for the date she'd probably came all this way to meet. . .

"Wait -" I tried clinging onto her, desperately reaching for her hand before she could leave again, "I need to tell you something!"

"You should probably return to your date." Her words felt so distant and cold. It was almost like she was hoping that if we separated at this point it would cut all ties between us completely. Not wanting anything more to do with the guy who couldn't even be honest with himself, let alone with the rest of the world. . . or with her.

"I want to apologize for last time." I persisted, refusing to let things end this way.

"Apologize for what?" She pulled away from me, "You didn't do anything."

"Don't play dumb, Adams. It doesn't suit you."

"You're wasting my time." She rolled her eyes and tried to leave again.

"Just listen!" I begged, running in front of her to block her path, like I had done so many times before, fearing she'd disappear for good if I let her take another step, "I messed up, okay? It's just that with Stacy and everyone watching. . . I never meant to -"

"Throw me under the bus?" My heart dropped at hearing her true thoughts escape her lips, and I wanted nothing more but to rewind and change what I'd done. To go back in time and stop her from ever feeling that way because of me. . .

"That wasn't what I was trying to do. . . "

"But you did," She nodded, "And now I know where we stand. So, it's probably best you stop conversing with someone who's apparently 'obsessed' with you this much." She scoffed and tried moving past me, only to be stopped again by my blocking.

"Adam's, please! I never wanted to get you into that mess, but you know why I had to do that stuff back there -"

"No, I don't." She said firmly, eyes burning right through me, "I don't get why you have to do any of this to impress people you're never going to see again in a couple of years. I don't understand how any of this is going to make you feel better about yourself at all? It's pointless, and stupid, and in the end you'll not only have destroyed the lives of those fallen victim to your _glory_ \- but you'll have also ruined yourself because you'll have to live out the rest of your years regretting all the things you've done here."

There it was, the anger and honesty I'd been expecting. She was right, she always was, but that didn't make me feel any better. Nothing would because I knew how badly I had hurt her at this point. There was nothing my apology would do to fix any of this. The trust I'd formed with her had been damaged from the very beginning and now I had shattered it completely. There was no going back, no rewriting the past, and there was nothing I could do to change her mind right now. . . and maybe not ever.

"Adam's. . ."

"Let's just drop it already. We're lab partners after all, nothing more, so let's just stick with that and move on." She said, lowering her eyes and turning away to end the conversation.

"I get it. . ." I took a deep breath, "But even though you won't believe me, I really am sorry. I never wanted it to go down like this. I just didn't know what else to do. . ."

"West. . ." She whispered through her breath, music to my ears at hearing her call me by my last name again. My eyes shot up to meet hers, eager to hear what she had to say next, praying it would somehow mend the bond I had broken. I needed some form of hope, something, anything that would give me a chance to fix this. Then, finally, she began to speak again. . .

"You don't need to hurt people to feel good about yourself."

Those words shot through me like a bullet in the chest. Never had I ever expected to hear my own lecture thrown back at me this way, and by a girl who looked exactly like _her_. I really was no better than the criminals I locked away. I had no right to keep my title as a hero in this city, or anywhere else.

When I had used those words on jinx I was trying to pull out what little humanity she had left from the corruption she'd drowned herself in, and I'm sure that's exactly why it was being said to me. I had fallen into something that had tainted my name, my decisions, and my thoughts. Now, it had finally been seen by someone else who had the courage to finally say it out loud. But to think it would have came from someone who looked just like _her_. . .

What are the odds?

"Adam's I -"

"Rosie!" An annoying voice came cutting through our conversation. The captain of the soccer team glided right over to meet with his 'date' in order to keep me away from her. I knew he was up to something by the look he gave me after reaching the small girl. It was the same look he had on the day he asked her out. Even thinking about the endless ideas he'd conjured up in his head that involved the Adam's girl gave me chills, and I had a feeling that if I left them alone I'd only regret it later on.

"Mister Miller." She nodded at the boy who reached for her hand.

"It's just Shawn." He corrected the girl who had a strange habit of addressing people by their last names.

"Well, that's what I'm going to call you if you ever use that stupid nickname on me again." She glared, stepping away from the boy before he could even touch her.

"Sorry," He laughed nervously before focusing on me, "Ah, Wally! You don't need to worry about keeping this one company. I've got it from here." He grinned widely, placing an arm around the girl who flinched at his touch until she'd forced herself to go along with it. I could sense how uncomfortable she felt, trying to keep a short distance between the guy who wanted to stay close to her. . . and that pissed me off.

I hated seeing her like that. To see someone else holding her that way and making her go along with something that clearly bothered her. Yet she didn't speak up, she just went with it as if she didn't have a say or a choice. Like a stray kitten fearing to disappoint her new owner after the many betrayals she'd endured in the past. . .

And it sickened me.

"Adam's just hear me out, please." I whispered in desperation, trying not to give the miller kid any reason to question our relationship. She watched me silently again, cold and hard, as if she were taking it all under consideration. But in the end, I still couldn't win. . .

"Goodbye, Wally West." She tried to smile a bit, leaving it at that and nodding her head before being led down onto the dance floor by her date.

I knew it would have ended this way. I knew that this was the scenario that would most likely occur if I tried to speak to her tonight. There was no way she would let the whole thing slide no matter how many times I apologized - at least not now. But there was still hope, and that was more than enough for me to keep trying. Even though I'd shattered our bond, the pieces were still there, laying and waiting to be repaired. And that's what I was going to do. I was going to fix this and repair what I had broken. It wouldn't be easy, but it was never easy with her to begin with. And those occasional glances she'd make in my direction were signs that it wasn't too late. I could still start over as long as she carried a shred of hope somewhere, because in the end. . .

 **That was all I needed.**


	30. Chapter 29: Homecoming Pt: IV

Chapter 29: Homecoming Pt. IV

Jinx

The soothing sound of the faucet running helped clear my thoughts. My racing heart had finally settled in the comforts of the girls restroom, and my shaking limbs had stopped after taking a few deep breaths. It wasn't that I was scared or anything like that, but returning to face my tormenters made me surprisingly anxious since leaving my home. I was prepared to stand my ground without any fear but that didn't change my situation at all. I was still weak in their world, and that's how it would always be as long as I played the part of a dead girl known to them as _Rose Adams_.

But I did it. I made it far enough to survive a few hours of dancing and chattering with the annoying Shawn Miller. And I was proud that I had come this far to prove to them they couldn't tear me down. I'd made my point and that felt rewarding enough, even if it meant having to put up with the Miller kid for the night. Although, if I had known how terrible it'd be to waste even a minute of my time with him I probably never would have agreed to be his date. That would most likely be one of the worst things about this dance, but then again, there _was_ the whole _West_ thing that made everything pretty bad. I couldn't even make a move without having girls glaring at me. It also didn't help that he'd tried speaking to me after what had happened the other day. Now, I couldn't even be sure if he was ever on my side at all. Was it all just part of some plan to toy with me? His way of harassing me by thinking we could ever be close only to tear me down? Yeah, that was probably it. What other reason would there be for him to have ever wanted to talk to me on his own? It had all just been one big joke to him, and I had mindlessly fallen victim to his little game. . .

How could I have been so stupid?

"Peek-a-boo! I found you~" A voice echoed from the doorway, bouncing off the walls in the restroom. I had trouble recognizing the voice at first, my thoughts too busy fogging up my memory, but the figure that appeared in the mirrors in front of me gave it all away.

"Stacy. . ." I watched her through the reflection of glass, passing by stalls in the background, as she waited for the perfect moment to strike.

"You sure cleaned up nice." She whispered in my ear after gliding over to my side, "I didn't think you'd have the guts to show your face tonight."

"Then I guess you don't know me very well." I tried remaining calm, keeping my breathing smooth and steady to wipe out any sign of weakness she'd most likely use to her advantage.

"I guess not. . ." She grinned, reaching out to slowly run her fingers through my hair, "But this isn't over yet. I still have a few more tricks up my sleeve."

"Why are you doing all of this?" I forced myself to ask the blonde dressed in pink, trying to pin point what it was that started this whole mess in the first place. Had it been random? Did I offend her in any way? Was it really all just about Wally? And. . . was he in on it to?

"Because I hate people who don't know their place. You tried stealing something from me, and I'm just trying to take it back. . ."

"But I never stole anything from -"

"Silence!" She screamed, raging anger shooting through her eyes. She held tightly onto a handful of my hair, and I waited for the pulling and beatings to take place any moment now, but instead, she let me go. The anger pushed behind a mask she forced on to hide away her true intentions. "Don't worry, I have bigger plans for you."

"What exactly are you planning?" I knew asking would be pointless, but not knowing struck a shred of fear inside me that she was able to catch onto.

"Just enjoy your little night, Cinderella -" She giggled, "Because once the clock strikes twelve it'll all be over." She whispered again before heading for the exit, her smile sending shivers running all over me. It was clear that there was something far bigger she was plotting, something that would put me at a great risk. However, I refused to let her win another round and that meant I couldn't let her get away with whatever she had in mind. I needed to win, I needed to beat her, and I needed to prove to everyone that I wasn't the same helpless little girl I was years ago. Powers or no powers, I was going to survive this - I _had_ to.

"You know -" I spoke up before she could leave the room, retrieving her attention, "I'm not sure if you've ever seen Cinderella, but if that's the character you've put me as then you should know in the end. . . I win." She was fueling with anger after that, slamming the door behind her once she'd finally left, giving me a chance to breathe again. I had no idea what I was doing, or what I was up against, but the brainless bimbo was great at bringing more stress into my life.

Not only did I have to keep my guard up at school from now on, but I also had the brotherhood to worry about as well. Maybe I had added more things into my life than I could handle, and maybe quitting would be the best option for me at this point. But my pride wouldn't allow me to back out now. I wasn't going to live my life wondering 'What if' and that's exactly what I'd be doing if I let them kick me out. My word is my bond, and I promised Terra I'd live out the dream she never got the chance to try out on her own. If I couldn't even do that much then I'd never be able to forgive myself. . . I had already let her down once.

A sigh escaped my lips and I forced myself to turn around and look at the girl in the mirror again. Even though she hid behind a disguise, the beast still lurked within, and that meant _nothing_ and _no one_ could scare me away. I was a survivor, a leader, and a powerful being that chased after one thing, and one thing alone - Power. That's what fueled me, and that's what would save our family, just as long as we could prove ourselves worthy, and not just to the brotherhood of evil, but to ourselves. I needed to become someone powerful enough to make the universe pay for what it'd done in the past, someone strong enough to lead a revolt against the government that destroyed us, someone worthy to stand as an equal alongside the most powerful group on this planet - just like that Russian beast. She was ruthless and selfish, but she was stronger than all of us combined, and if I wanted to beat her I'd need to _become_ her. That meant no more weak moments or second guessing, no more getting caught up in the nonsense of this school, and no more attachments to people that held no real worth in my life. . . like _him_. I just needed to stay focused on what was important, and only then would I be able to win this cruel game life has thrown me into. There was no other option left for someone like me. I could either fight or die trying, but anything else was out of the question. . .

"We need to talk." Linda Park appeared at the entrance, blocking the door with a garbage can to keep everyone else out.

"You just can't take a hint can you?" I groaned miserably, stepping away from the sink to face her, "I don't have time for this." I told her before heading for the door to escape confrontation.

"Fine -" She began after I'd moved passed her to remove the can stopping me from leaving, "If I can't get my sister to talk to me, then I'll settle for _jinx_ instead."

I froze where I stood, staring at the tiled floor to let everything sink in. All that was going through my head were her words, and I questioned whether or not I had heard her right. She couldn't have known, no one could, so how? I had been careful. There was no way she could have found out this quickly. Especially not with the ring I had on, it wasn't possible. My secret, my identity, how could it have been exposed? How did she figure it out? And were there others who knew?

"I finally got your attention." She smirked, appearing victorious at keeping me in the same room with her.

"How did you. . ." I stopped myself from asking anything else, knowing she'd most likely never share what more she knew, and instead stood ready to fight, "If you tell anyone about this I'll -"

"You'll what? Shoot a hex at me? Go for it, do whatever you must. That won't stop me." She crossed her arms and leaned against the faucet fearlessly.

"Are you insane? I could kill you right now!" I spat, ready to remove my ring at any moment now.

"I know. I'm quite aware of how weak I am compared to you. If killing me is what you need to do then fine. I'll understand, because I know it's what you feel I deserve. I got away scot free while they did all of this to you. It wasn't fair. So do it, kill me right here, right now. . ." She was trembling as she spoke, but it was more out of guilt than fear. She truly meant what she said, prepared to die at my hands, and I knew her words were sincere. After all, she wasn't the first I'd encountered to wish for death. . . .

My mind swarmed with a mixture of emotions that forced the ring off my finger. There were so much piling up inside me, anger, hatred, envy, sadness, pain. . . and it suffocated me. I screamed in agony, running at her and ready to attack. I forced her onto the ground and raised my hand to destroy the girl who had betrayed me in the past, pink sparks forming on the tip of my fingers. She was right, she deserved this, no - she deserved worse. She got to get away, she didn't have to go through hell like the rest of us. She was no better than me, yet she was granted such blissful memories as a child. She was older, she was happier, she was smarter, she was prettier, she was just _better_.

And I hated that.

This was my chance to end it all. To make her pay for all she'd done by living out her life joyously while the rest of us were left to suffer on our own. Why did it have to be her? Why couldn't it have been me instead? Why was I forced into this life? Why couldn't our roles have been reversed. . .?

These questions were pointless, these emotions were pointless, and this entire situation was pointless. I already knew why it had all went down this way. I knew that if we had switched places she never would have survived any of it, the others never would have escaped, and all it would have done was end more lives in the prison they'd locked us in. And there was no way I would have allowed anyone to go through the hell I'd been fortunate enough to survive.

"I hate you. . ." The thought escaped my lips as the hand I held in the air had given up and fallen to my side. The tears had begun to slip down my face, despite my restraint, and my body refused to obey me as it hovered over her shaking. I had returned to the child I had been before, unable to hold back all the emotions that overpowered me and transformed me into a crying mess. My face hid itself in her chest, sobbing and weeping after losing all control. There was no changing what had happened, or mending the bond we'd broken, it just couldn't be done. No matter how much part of me wished it could. . .

It was still impossible.

"I'm sorry. . ." I heard her sob as she held me in her arms. I understood that this wasn't her fault, my fate had nothing to do with her, and she had even gone so far as to find me now, but it was easier to hate her. It was easier to draw a line between us in order to keep our worlds separate. In order to keep her _safe_. This was the only way. . .

"Enough of this." I cleared my throat and pulled away from her before getting back up.

"You can't keep doing this Rose. You can't keep chasing after that woman your entire life. . ." Her knowledge about my personal life made me slightly worried. My identity had already been exposed to her, but to think she'd caught on to something my own teammates weren't even aware of, made her a huge threat to my livelihood.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Please, you don't think I would have noticed? It's obvious the only reason you've gone down this road is because you're trying to impress her. Why you'd do something like that is what I still don't understand, but there's no way it'll work! She left us on our own because she didn't want anything more to do with us!"

"You don't know that!" I snarled, pushing her to the wall, "She could change!"

"She'll never change, Rose. Why don't you get that?" She winced in pain and stumbled a few steps backwards before returning to the ground again, "She may have been our mother once, but you and I both know that Russian beast isn't capable of caring for anyone else but herself."

"I'm through with this conversation."

"Rose wait -" She tried grabbing onto my hand, desperately clinging on to a life we could never share.

"Just stop!" I ordered, wrenching out of her grip, "You might be right about her but you're wrong about me, there's more to this than you'll ever know, and that's why I can't give you what you want! I can't be the little sister you used to have! She died. . . and I'm sorry but I can't be her anymore. . ." My voice quivered as reality forced out the truth, and I had no choice but to slide the ring back on to return back into character.

"No. . ." She cried and tried getting back up as I made my way to the door, pushing the can away to leave. "Y-You're wrong! We still. . . We still have a chance, you just have to trust me -"

"That's the thing!" I stopped and glanced over my shoulder to meet her eyes, "I _can't_ trust you. I can't _trust_ anyone." And with nothing more to say I ran out the door without a second thought.

The door shut behind me slowly and I tried my best not to look back one last time. But once it closed I could hear her softly weeping inside, alone, still blaming herself for something neither of us could have prevented. It was impossible for me to run in and go off with her without breaking my word. There were people counting on me, family I needed to protect, and if that meant throwing away my own flesh and blood then fine. I'd do it. There was no time to regret anything at this point if I wanted to succeed.

This was more than just power - this was about revenge. I needed to look at the bigger picture if I wanted to win this fight, and that meant sacrificing everything. It wasn't about Linda, or the titans, or even my mother. This was about becoming something bigger than all of that, bigger than the world itself, in order to dominate it and destroy those who had harmed us. Maybe I was wrong, maybe I was right, and maybe my mind had been poisoned by the revenge I'd been plotting for years. In the end, it didn't matter because my mind had been set. One way or another, they needed to pay, and I wouldn't be able to rest until I'd destroyed every last one of them with my own hands. . .

"There you are!" Someone reached for my hand, making me step away quickly to see who it was standing behind me.

"Oh, Shawn. . ." I sighed in relief at finding the boy who'd appeared from down the hall.

"What took you so long? I was starting to get worried."

"Sorry, I just needed to get some air. We can go back now. . ." I smiled, heading for the direction of the gym until he placed a hand on my shoulder to stop me.

"Actually, I was hoping we could go somewhere else. It's gotten pretty stuffy back there."

"Alright. . ." I muttered incredulously, "Where did you have in mind?"

"Just follow me!" He said rather quickly, taking my hand and pulling me in a different direction from where the dance had been taking place. There was something odd about him that made me want to turn away, but if I did that then I'd only end up making another enemy on campus - and that was the last thing I needed right now.

We ended up moving to the far end of the school and arrived to a two door entrance. It was strange that the Miller kid had a pair of keys to unlock it, but I figured he was just like West and must have had his own connections with getting around on campus.

The smell of chlorine escaped after he'd opened the door for us. It was dark but I knew that we were heading into the schools indoor swimming area. I went along with it, not knowing what else to do, and he took my hand again to guide me inside. The lights eventually flickered on once we stepped in, and I had to admit that it was nice being away from everyone else. Even if I wasn't very fond of the boy, I didn't mind being stuck with him if it meant not having to deal with everyone else.

"What do you think?" He asked, smiling at me as we walked by the edge of the water.

"Well, it's a lot better than being in a gym full of people that hate you." I shrugged, and slipped my hand out of his to continue on further ahead. I didn't want to give him the wrong impression and have some other bimbo come yelling that I had stolen Shawn from her too. The last thing I needed was to form any kind of bond with anyone at this school, because it would only get me into even more trouble. Right now, I just needed to focus on getting through the night, passing high school, and earning a spot with the Brotherhood of Evil. That was it. Anything else would only be a distraction from my main goal.

I stared up at the glass ceiling that revealed dark skies decorated with brightly lit stars. The moon was partly covered by heavy clouds slowly forming once again, letting us know that rain was on it's way back into this town. It was nice watching the night sky like this, something I could never enjoy doing locked up in an attic or behind bars. The smell of chlorine was also nice to breathe in and sooth my troubled mind. There was no need for me to keep worrying about anything anymore. As long as I stayed true to myself and fought for what I believed in, then I'd eventually succeed. So, it was pointless in stressing out about anything else.

"This is nice. . ." Shawn whispered in my ear, wrapping his arms around me to hold me from behind. I let out an awkward laugh and tried pulling away from the boy who didn't seem to want to let go.

A wave of panic coursed through my head as he held onto me tighter than before, tracing my arm with the tip of his fingers. But the moment his hands began travelling down the side of my dress I knew something was wrong. I could feel his lips nipping on the side of my neck before letting his tongue slip out. That's when the struggling began.

"Let me go!" I screamed, desperately pulling away from the boy who had me trapped in a room where no one would bother searching for us.

"C'mon, Rosie. Don't you wanna play?" The boy laughed, forcing me to turn around and face him. I tried desperately to escape, unable to use my powers without exposing my true identity, leaving me weak and defenseless. My pleas didn't seem to help either, it's only affect in making my tormenters smile grow even bigger.

"I said stop!" I yelled, pushing away from the boy until I'd finally broken free from his grip. My body had pulled away far enough to escape, and my arm had slipped right out of his grip. I was out, I was free, and I was safe. . . but then. . . I was falling.

And I kept falling.

My body never hit the ground, but instead crashed into the water and sank until it met halfway into the bottom of the pool. My arms sprung around, trying to return to the surface, but I just kept sinking. This was my only true weakness, something I'd never been able to overcome, and a fear I never wanted to face ever again.

My lungs screamed for oxygen the further I fell but there was no way of escaping this. No one would save me, no one would even bother trying, because the only person who could, stood watching and laughing from above. It wasn't until another figure approached with her camera, that I realized what was really going on. This was what she'd been planning all along, the end of the game she'd started for no reason.

This was it. This was where I was going to die. I could already feel myself slipping away again when my body had given up in escaping the water. So, I just laid there, floating and waiting for it to end. The blonde bimbo and her accomplice recording with their phones and laughing as if it were some huge joke. That would be the last thing I'd see before I was gone - forced out without being given the chance to accomplish anything. I had failed. Just like in the beginning. Except this time, there would be no more chances. And as my body sank to the bottom of the pool I learned to accept that. Then, I shut my eyes and let the universe do it's job. And suddenly, everything was dark again. . .

 **And I was no more.**


	31. Chapter 30: Homecoming Pt: V

Chapter 30: Homecoming Pt. V

Kid Flash

There was nothing I could do here. I couldn't think, I couldn't speak, I couldn't even breathe with everyone watching me. I was drowning in my own popularity and I was starting to get sick of it. How did I get myself caught up in all of this? When did it all start? And why couldn't I walk away? I felt stuck and I didn't know why? Whatever answer I managed to come up with never felt good enough after all the harm I'd done over the years. The Adam's girl was right. . .

She was always right.

My attempt at living up to everyone's expectations of me couldn't be done, and it seemed to have only caused more damage than good. Why couldn't I just be honest? Why couldn't I have stood up for her? And why did I always fail at protecting those I actually cared for? It didn't make any sense to anyone, not even me. I needed to do something. I needed to find a way out of this mess - fast. If not, I'd never forgive myself. . . especially for letting her run off with some other dude.

"Wally! Where you going?" One of my teammates yelled from across the room after I'd gotten out of my seat and headed in the direction of the halls.

"I'll be back!" I waved before leaving the gym, not wanting to give a further explanation and risk having them keep me around. I needed to get away, to catch some fresh air, and not stress too much on everything that had gone down. But most importantly. . . I needed to find Linda.

I went searching down the halls for my date, realizing I hadn't seen her since she'd decided to grab a drink. I called out to her a couple of times but there was no response at first. And just when I was about to give up and go searching on the dance floor, she suddenly came out of hiding from the girls restroom.

I was relieved to find her safe and in sight. Especially because I wasn't ready to join the rest of the crowd just yet. But those feelings shifted into that of concern when I noticed her rub her hand over red puffy eyes. She looked miserable and deeply upset about something. Something that made her cry long enough to have her eyes swell up. . .

"Woah, what happened?" I took her hands to remove them from off her face to get a better look at her. It hadn't even been half an hour since she'd disappeared, yet she'd somehow turned out this way. What could have happened that brought along that pained expression?

"Sorry, I - uh, " A laugh was forced out in her trying to cover up what'd really gone down, "I got something stuck in my eye. . ."

"Both eyes?"

"Apparently. It might have been the dust in the bathroom or something. . ." She was clearly lying, and I wasn't buying the smile she had on for a second. Still, I had no right to pry into something that didn't involve me - and she didn't seem like she'd be willing to share what really happened any time soon.

"They should really clean those bathrooms then." I joked, making her laugh a little.

"Yeah, probably."

"Alright then," I smiled, taking her hand in mine, "We should try ditching the scene while we still can. The night doesn't seem like it's going to get any better here." I waited for her to say something, knowing very well how exhausted she probably felt after whatever had gone on before.

"Sounds like a plan." She nodded and followed me back down the hallway in search for the exit. It was probably better we leave now when we still had the chance. It'd been suffocating enough to have even bothered showing up. There was nothing left for me here, no other reason that could tie me down to this place for the rest of the night. I had done what I could today and there was nothing else that would help my situation. At least by leaving now I'd be able to think a lot more clearly in figuring everything out, with school, the team, my friends, and my life in general. Then maybe, _just_ maybe, I'd have a better chance at mending the bond I'd broken with the Adam's girl. . .

"Oh, hold up." Linda stopped, pulling me back before sliding her hand out of mine in order to reach for the phone in her bag.

After she'd tapped the screen back on I felt a sudden buzz coming from my _own_ pocket. I groaned at having to pull out my cell, convinced it'd most likely be my Uncle nagging about what time I'd be home, or the guys wondering where I'd run off to, or even one of the many girls on my contact list asking if I were free after the dance tonight. That would make sense, and that was what I'd been expecting, but when the screen lit up it was Stacy's number that appeared instead. . .

"That's weird. . ." I heard Linda quietly whisper to herself before I tapped the screen to read the message, but all that was sent to me was a video attachment under the Barbie's name.

I wasn't sure what it was, or what to expect, especially after the last video she'd shown me, but I had a feeling that it wasn't going to be a good one. Still, I forced myself to press play and prepared for whatever was ready to show up on my screen. But just before I could even watch the first few seconds a crowd of people came storming from out of the gym and rushed past us.

They all headed in the same direction, but I knew there wasn't any real danger that brought them running based on their excitement and laughter. This was all them, they left on their own, for reasons that were still unknown to me. Why they were leaving, and where they were going, though, were the real questions that needed answering.

"Hey, kid!" I reached for the first person I could grab, pulling out a random dweeb in a blue tuxedo and large spectacles from out of the crowd.

"Y-You're Wally West!"

"I'm aware. Just tell me what's going on here? Where is everyone headed?" I demanded to know, gripping onto the kids jacket.

"D-Didn't you get t-the message?" He asked, trembling in fear of my actions.

"Message? What mess-"

"Wally!" Linda pulled onto my sleeve, trying to get my attention before lifting up her phone, "Look. . ."

There was a video playing that revealed two figures standing by the edge of a pool, and an annoyingly familiar laughter could be heard in the background trying to keep the camera steady from behind a door. But it wasn't until the camera had zoomed in closer that I knew who the stars of this video were, and their infamous director. And when I saw the Adam's girl struggling to break free from the boy I had allowed her to run off with, I knew I had seen enough. This was my fault - again! I had left her in his hands and gotten her dragged into this game the schools Barbie had created. . .

But that would all end here.

I was through in letting everyone else call the shots. The bad guy role on campus wasn't working for me anymore, not when it put those I cared about in danger. I was going to put an end to all of it, tonight, right here and now. . .

Or I'd _never_ win her back.

"We gotta move!" I told Linda after releasing the other kid. She looked at me, almost as if she knew exactly what I'd been thinking, and chose to follow along.

We stormed past the crowd, racing through to make it to where they had all been planning to go. After all, it was no mystery that the video had been shot in the schools pooling area. However, I wasn't sure how much time had really passed since they'd recorded. The whole thing could have ended by now, and that very thought was what scared me the most. . .

How could I have let her run off on her own like that? I knew the Miller kid was up to something, but I just shrugged it off and let them keep messing with her. I should have done something. I should have figured it all out sooner. I should have been able to protect her. I should have _been_ there for her. But, now, it might have been too late.

There was no way she'd forgive me if I didn't make it to her on time. She already hated me enough, but this would surely destroy any chance I had in making it up to her. She'd never forgive me this time if I failed again. After all, it was my fault she had gotten mixed up in all of this in the first place. . . but I wasn't going to let that stop me this time. I had to do _something_ , I _needed_ to step in, but once we reached the entrance to the schools indoor pool it became an even bigger mission to push past everyone to see what was really going on in the front.

I needed to slide through them, Linda trying to keep up with me from behind, but it felt like I was wasting even more time just trying to confront the ones responsible for this mess. But when I did, and finally gained access to face the two culprits, there didn't seem to be any sign of the Adam's girl anywhere nearby. The only ones I found were Stacy and Shawn laughing by the edge of the pool, their cameras filming the water with the rest of the crowd in an uproar. And all I could do was stand there, confused by the situation until, finally, I'd caught on to what they'd found so amusing. . .

That's when I saw _her_.

The distorted image of a girl sinking to the bottom of the water motionlessly was what everyone was staring at. It humored them to watch her fall deeper in, spouting out different names to mock her while they cheered for the one filming. I felt hopeless, seeing that I failed to make it on time to save her from the embarrassment, and waited for her to come swimming back up to say something. To yell at me, or everyone, and storm out of the room alone. . .

But she did nothing.

The cheers began to soften until it reached silence. Everyone was confused with what was going on, and why she made no attempt in leaving the water on her own. Then the realization of the moment finally hit us and that's when they began to worry.

"Alright, cut it out already freak!" Stacy tried calling to the girl in the water, "We all know you're faking it!" She yelled, hoping to get the crowd going again, but received no response from the girl or the group of people surrounding her.

"What's going on?"

"Why isn't she moving?"

The shrill cry of a girl in the crowd worsened the situation and brought the tension rising quickly. Our fear increasing the longer we waited, secretly wishing it'd be part of some big joke or prank. But when seconds passed, and they saw no change in the girls movement, _that's_ when the real panic started. . .

"Somebody do something!" Linda begged, turning to everyone to save the girl they had shamelessly allowed to fall into Stacy's little plan.

Several voices screamed for someone to search for help, to call a teacher, a cop, anyone that could save the girl from the brink of death. . . and that's when I finally understood the _truth_.

She had been right all along, and I didn't fully comprehend that until now. These were the people I had allowed to take control over my life. The ones I'd been trying to impress by playing the bad guy on campus - and for what? They were nothing but cowards, and somewhere along the line I had given them permission to morph me into one just like them. . . but not anymore. I was through with their games, and in entertaining them by harming people like _her_. She didn't deserve this, she didn't deserve _any_ of this. And at this point I was done going along with their childish acts. They could say what they wanted, they could spread whatever lies they felt needed to be spoken, that no longer mattered to me - but over all, I was done watching them put this girl in anymore danger. They had already taken enough from me, but not this. . .

Not _her too_!

I didn't have any time to waste on their debates or waiting on someone to do something. I acted on instinct and rushed in on my own, tossing my jacket to the floor before throwing myself into the water. The screams that had risen before were wiped out the moment my body crashed into the pool, and it yearned for warmth after plunging into icy cold water, but I couldn't even imagine how worse it must have felt for the girl sinking until she'd hit the bottom.

I moved in to reach for her, praying it wouldn't have been too late, but the closer I got to her the more painful it had become. My heart ached with every move I made, the guilt eating me away from the inside. Then, when I'd finally floated over her, everything had stopped. . . .

Eyes shut, lips parted, body motionless, and hair stringing in different directions. If I hadn't carried even the slightest bit of hope, my mind would have given up and accepted her as a dead corpse. I had to try, I had to hope, I needed to succeed this time, because there wouldn't be any chance of recovering from this if I failed her. I wouldn't be able to go another day knowing I'd messed up again. That I had ruined another life. . .

My heart stopped beating for a moment, and I tried my best to push away any of the negativity swarming my mind in order to keep hope alive. I grabbed the girl by her waist, her small frame making it easier for me to hold her with one hand, and swam for the surface. But I could hear time ticking away in my head, reminding me of what little was left for me to keep her from leaving us. . . from leaving _me_.

A group came rushing to the edge the second I came up for air. They called for me to swim over, and helped in pulling us out to keep from wasting anymore time. My body ached tremendously due to the impact of yesterdays game, and I wanted nothing more but to lay on the ground and rest for a moment - but there was no time for that.

The Adam's girl laid still on the wet floor, unable to breathe after how much time she'd spent in the water. The group made room for someone to save her, and I didn't hesitate to become that person. I pulled myself over to her side, pushing the strands of hair fallen over her face, and placed my head against her chest. I felt nearly relieved at hearing the glorious sound of her heart still beating, meaning there was still enough time for her to recover from this. Everyone was relying on me now, the crowd, Linda, and most importantly - _her_. This wasn't how it was suppose to end, this couldn't be where our paths cut off, and if I wanted to keep them intersecting then I'd need to bring her back. . .

I pressed both hands over her chest after checking her pulse, silently counting to keep her heart pumping. My head felt dizzy, my body felt weak, and my heart raced anxiously for the final results. I tried speeding up, hoping she'd wake up on her own, but nothing changed.

I placed my head over her face, but couldn't feel any air escaping her mouth and had no choice but to connect my lips to hers. I breathed into her, trying to restore the life I would be truly held responsible for if she couldn't wake up, but the clock kept ticking, and I tried to force out all the air I carried to keep her chest beating. . .

But there was no change.

"You can't do this. . ." I pulled away, pushing my hands into her chest again to keep pumping, "You can't do this to me!" I screamed, tears surfacing as time kept moving forward. It wouldn't stop, rewind, or change - it just kept moving on without me.

This couldn't be the end. This couldn't be how we said goodbye. Not after everything I'd left unsaid. There was suppose to be more time, I was suppose to fix this. . . I _had_ to. But that didn't seem to matter to her at this point. She didn't mind selfishly leaving me there without giving me the chance to say everything that needed to be said. I hated this. . . I hated _her_! I knew I'd never be able to move past this, but I'd never forgive her if she left me behind this way. Not now, not like this. . .

"Dammit!" I leaned back down and placed my lips over hers again, letting all the air in my lungs come pouring out. I kept trying, even when it felt hopeless, I didn't want to give up. Wishing that what I felt whenever our lips met was a sign she'd get better, that she'd be okay. But when the results appeared obvious in the end. . . I stopped.

I stared at the girl who showed no signs of recovery and shut my eyes before placing my forehead against hers. I begged for her heart to keep beating, to keep her alive and by my side. . . but there was only silence. I refused to face Linda, knowing very well the disappointment she'd show if our eyes met, and buried my face in the girls chest to accept my failure. The tears poured out of my eyes when I thought back to all that I'd done. Would I have been able to stop this? Did she blame me for failing to help her? Was she hoping that I'd save her? And how did she feel when she realized I wouldn't make it on time? Did she hate me? Could she forgive me? And if I had been faster, could I have succeeded?

There were hundreds of questions swarming through my head as I cried over her, my screams echoing the louder they managed to escape. I couldn't think of anything else to do, where to go, who to speak to. . . because it all led back to her. I just needed to see _her_. That was it. And the worst part of it all, was that I hadn't realized how attached I'd gotten to the girl until this moment. And that made me hate myself even more. Now I was left with an empty void I craved to fill, and all I could think about were the ones truly responsible for all of this. I'd been pushed straight off the edge, and all I could feel was anger. I wanted someone to pay for this, anyone, it didn't matter who. Then, my sanity kicked in, and I knew the only one who should be put at fault here. . . Was me. But, just when I was close to accepting it. . .

She was back.

The heavy coughs released the water that had been trapped in her throat and lungs. She was breathing again, and everyone was filled with great relief - especially me. I wanted so much to hold her in my arms, to embrace her tightly and never let her go, but she seemed fairly exhausted when she'd woken, and I knew if I was too rough on her it would cause even more damage.

"Adams!" I called to her, pushing a few more strands of hair from off her face to give her a better view of everything.

"Wally. . ." She squinted, looking around in a daze, confused with everything that was going on.

"Thank god you're okay." My heart raced at hearing her voice and I was certain now that this was no dream.

"Get. . . get away f-from me. . ." She breathed, pushing me away despite how weak she must have felt, "Where are they. . ." She tried sitting up, searching for the two who had been responsible for tonights stunt.

"Rose, just rest for now." Linda came down, trying to stop the girl who made the effort in trying to get back up on her own.

"I don't need. . . your help." She told Linda, scowling and shoving her away, "I can handle this a-alone. . ." She tried to keep up her tough front, forcing herself on both feet before I'd reached for her hand.

"Adam's stop."

"Don't touch me." She yanked away, too fast for her to maintain, and stumbled backwards, "I can take care of myself. . . I don't need you."

"Just let me handle this, okay?" I begged, getting back up to block her from confronting the other two behind us.

"I said I don't need your help, idiot!" She snapped, and tried taking another step before falling on her knees.

"Adams. . ." I sighed, staring at the girl now laying on all fours ready to stand back up again.

"I can take care of -"

"I know!" I yelled, bending down to meet her eye level, "You can take care of yourself, I get that. But asking for help sometimes doesn't make you weak." Hazel eyes locked with mine as she stared at me long and hard. There was a long pause before she lowered her gaze, unable to fully trust in my words just yet.

"I can still. . . I can still handle -"

"Rose!" Her head shot up to look at me, wide eyes full of shock, "Please, just leave this to me." I begged, desperate to have her trust me for the time being. Not wanting to have to witness anyone harming her at such a fragile state.

I reached for my jacket and placed it over her, neither of us saying anymore as she sat back on the ground to rest. It appeared difficult for her to even keep her lids open, and I knew if I wanted to settle things now I'd need to do it quick. I left her in Linda's care, making sure they were both safe for the time being, before getting back up and turning to the two standing in the center of the crowd.

People whispered and stared, waiting for something to happen, as I made my way over to the one I truly despised. I rushed for the Miller kid, grabbing him by his collar ready to swing. But there was so much anger piling up inside me at just seeing his face that I knew would be impossible to contain if I attacked now. I wouldn't be able to stop if I initiated the fight, and it wouldn't be difficult to win based on how frightened he looked shaking in front of me. But, I stopped myself, trying not to let what he'd done to Rose force me to _lose_ myself. I didn't want to settle things this way, I wanted to make a point and end this stupid game, and that meant I needed answers. . .

"Wait, wait, wait, man!" Shawn held his hands up in defense, trying any means to save himself from being physically harmed, "It wasn't my idea, okay? Stacy did it - she paid me! I swear, I didn't want anything to do with it!" I watched the boy trembling in my hands, expecting to hear more, but it appeared the only person with the real answers here would be the blonde standing beside us.

"Traitor!" She yelled at the boy who was ready to sell her out with no more than a second thought. After that, I realized there was no point in pestering the wimp in my hand with questions, and directed my attention to the main culprit.

"Stacy. . ." I looked at her, tossing the boy to the floor before I moved in on the blonde, "Why'd you do it? Do you have any idea what could have happened tonight?"

"I don't care!" She quivered, clutching onto her phone, "She brought it on herself! She shouldn't have tried to take what was mine! You weren't suppose to get attached to her or anything remember!?"

I'd been struck by guilt once again in having to fix the mess I'd started long before I'd even met the Adam's girl. I'd toyed with too many hearts, including hers, and in the end it nearly cost me everything. But I wasn't going to back down this time. I wasn't going to keep piling up on all these lies, it needed to stop and be put at rest once and for all. . .

"I'm sorry, Stace. I can't keep doing this with you anymore. I don't blame you if you hate me, but it has to end here." It hurt me to watch her stare me down in disappointment and betrayal. If I hadn't been so careless, and taken peoples feelings under consideration, none of this would have ever happened. This all started with her, but that didn't mean it had to stay that way. I knew that. I just didn't want to accept it. I didn't want to have to hurt anyone, including Stacy, but if I couldn't do things my way then no one would be happy. . . At least, that's what a certain dweeb taught me to believe.

I slowly walked over to the blonde who turned away to avoid meeting my eyes. My hand carefully reached down for the cellphone in her hand, and she made no effort to stop me. Once it had been removed from her grip I had no choice but to step over to the edge of the pool and release it into the water. The blackmail, the videos, the taunting - it all ended here. And she didn't fight against that, watching the device sink to the very bottom through teary eyes.

"No more. . ." I began, stopping to turn and face the crowd watching us, watching me, like they'd been doing for the past several years, "I'm done with all this bullshit! I don't want to hear and see anymore of this! If you want to keep butting in then go ahead! Face me now!"

No one said anything, they just lowered their heads or backed away. Years I'd been scared in being true to myself because of how people would look at me. I didn't want to go against the image they portrayed me as or risk hurting people like Stacy. But now I stood ready to take whatever they had to say, and in the end there was nothing but silence. All that worrying, the fear, it had all been for nothing. Because in their eyes they could only see me as the great _Wally West_ , even if that now meant hanging around dweebs or getting straight A's. I was still me, and that wasn't going to change, but this time I'd be honest about it.

"We should go." Linda whispered over to me, pointing at the girl who had fallen asleep in her arms. Linda tried picking the Adam's girl back up, but her frail arms couldn't keep her standing for even a second, and I was left with the only option to carry her out on my own. Trouble seemed far out of sight at this point, and I took that as a good sign to ditch everyone else and leave campus with the only two people that really mattered to me at this school. And, for the first time, I was able to leave the school with the greatest feeling in the world. . .

Because I was free.

"You should probably drive her home." Linda suggested after we'd finally made it outside and on the schools parking lot.

"I can still take you -"

"No-" She quickly declined, "It'd be troubling if she woke up and I was still around. Besides, I already texted my dad. He should be getting here soon." She explained, walking me over to my car to help seat the sleeping girl I'd held in my arms.

"I'll wait with you then."

"It's fine." She said, shaking her head after zipping the seatbelt around Rose's waist. "You both need to get dried up fast or you'll get sick."

"You're probably right. . ." I nodded, shutting the door on Rose's side before moving over to the drivers seat. I had a strange feeling that there was more between the two than they led on, and that it was the reason Linda didn't want to stay stuck in the same room with the other girl. It just felt like she was hiding something, they both were, but asking wouldn't get me any straight answers. So, I figured I'd leave it at that for the night.

"Drive safe." She waved before returning to the entrance of the school to sit and wait for her ride to arrive.

After saying goodbye I sat inside the drivers side of the vehicle and put the keys in the ignition. My body shuddering in response to the cold air that snuck in as I leaned against my seat to rest. The skies were clouded, heavy and dark, but the stars were still able to shine through. It appeared like any ordinary night, but the events that occurred made it one I'd never forget. And it was all because of _her_.

She slept peacefully in the seat beside me, her head placed on the window of the door. Everything that had happened, everything that ended, all began since our first encounter. If I had known all that she was capable of doing to me I wouldn't have needed to force myself in denying her from the start. And now that everything had finally been put to rest there wasn't a need to resist anymore. It was over now. She was safe. And I could finally accept everything for what it was, and it brought me to realize that jinx had been right to shut me out of her life before. The way I was then, I never would have been able to truly help her when nothing I did ever made any sense. But that was over now. I didn't need to pretend anymore, I didn't need to hurt anyone anymore, I just needed this. . . I needed her. And after accepting that I realized this was what I'd wanted, what I'd always craved, and it was enough. . .

 ** _She_ was more than enough.**


	32. Chapter 31: Always

Chapter 31: Always

Jinx

 _It was dark. It was always dark. And that's all there ever was. . . darkness. In here I existed, but at the same time I was nothing. I blended in with the darkness, I was part of it, and it soothed me. There were no worries, nothing to stress out about, because here. . . I felt nothing. There was no greater purpose. There was no meaning behind my life. I just existed for the sole purpose of existing. Nothing more, nothing less. I was just here. That was it._

 _"We'll be together again. I promise." A child vowed, it's voice echoing around me without any figure or form._

 _"You lied. . ." I responded to the child's words, knowing very well who it had belonged to from the start._

 _"They can't keep us apart forever. I'll come back - I swear!"_

 _"Traitor." I spat, covering my ears to block out the volume of her voice increasing by the second._

 _"We can be a family again. You just have to trust me. . ."_

 _"I can't!" I screamed, convincing myself that she was no longer needed. That things were better this way. She was safer this way. I had to believe that, I needed to believe it, if I couldn't then I'd fall apart again. Our bond meant everything to me, but that needed to be severed if I wanted to win. . ._

 _"Rose!"_

 _"Stop it!" I begged, trying to block her out, "Stop calling me that!"_

 _"Rose, please!"_

 _"No! I'm not her! I can't be her!"_

 _She screamed for me, pleading for my return, and suddenly time had gotten lost somewhere in between. There was nothing that could be done now. She'd forever haunt me for this, she'd always be calling for me in the back of my head, and I'd always be forced to ignore her cries. . . like she had done mine. She never cared for me. She never bothered to worry. Why she'd suddenly decide to drop in was just bad timing, and it didn't improve either one of us. She needed to move on, I needed to move on, and forget it. Forget everything I ever was. I needed to at least do that much, and if she wanted to survive this. . . she'd need to do the same!_

 _"Stop it. . . no more. . ." I begged, ignoring the child's cry for my return, curling myself up within the darkness that had swallowed me long ago. I just needed to forget, to erase the memories we shared, and then I'd be free again. I'd be free of her, and all of it. . . even him._

 **"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"**

My eyes flew open in terror trying to escape the nightmare I'd been tossed in, and my body flung out of bed in response to it all. I gasped for air and quickly pushed the covers off of me, hoping to gain enough space to relax the heavy beating of my own heart. I had done it again. I had allowed the guilt to toy with my mind again. My questioning the situation and whether or not I'd done the right thing, was what was ruining me and my sanity. If I kept doubting myself with every decision I made it would surely put an end to me, but not knowing what was right was driving me insane. What should our next move be? What was the right thing to do? Were we wrong? Were any of us ever right to begin with? There were too many unanswered questions that came popping up in every situation lately that made it impossible for me to keep focus. I needed to be more alert, I couldn't risk worrying about issues that would lead me nowhere. I just needed to stay true to our promise, the mission, and our ultimate goal. Whether it was right or not wasn't important, and whether or not it was what I truly desired didn't matter. If it meant avenging those lost, and making them pay for what they'd taken from us - from me - then that was all that mattered. That's what I needed to remember. That's how I would survive. . .

"What!? What happ- "

"Ah!" I screamed at the intruder who came bursting into my room. The redhead, with a tendency to meddle in other peoples affairs, swung the door open and stepped inside on his own. He screamed in response to my own and backed away from the entrance immediately. I was ready to attack, to get answers in why and how he got here, fearing my identity had already been exposed at this point. However, everything felt hazy and my body felt fairly weak, I knew it'd be a difficult task in escaping now, but it gave me time to stop and realize where I sat. I was unfamiliar with the surroundings, the walls, the doors, the windows - and that's when I realized. . . this wasn't my home. This wasn't my room. . .

It was _his_.

"Woah, I come in peace!" He jumped, waving his hands up to defend his actions.

"Where are we?" I demanded to know, pushing myself off the bed to step away from the boy standing across from me.

"Calm down," He said, slowly stepping inside, "I was planning on taking you home until I remembered you never told me where you lived. So I brought you to my place - well my aunt and uncle's place. . ."

"Why would you bring me -" I stopped after my confusion had vanished and the memories of tonight's events came storming back. The dance happened, the fight between linda, the blonde's prank, I was drowning and then. . . and then. . .

"You saved me. . ."

"Glad you're alright." He smiled, relief softening the worry in his eyes before fully entering into the room, "Sorry for scaring you, I heard you scream and I just. . . panicked I guess?" He scratched the back of his head and forced out a laugh to break the awkward tension between us.

"Right, well. . . thank you for everything but I should probably -" I took a step forward to leave but immediately stopped when my eyes caught sight of something in the closet. A purple gown hanging alone stood dry and still, the same gown I had on the entire night. After spotting something like that I realized it had been my own dress, and it brought me to notice the pink pajama set I had on didn't belong to me. . . so who's were they? Or better yet, how did they get on me?

"Y-You. . ." I panicked, wrapping my arms around myself in the disgust of what might have occurred while I was unconscious, "What did you do to me!?" I yelled, glaring at the idiot I desperately wanted to destroy for stooping as low as the rest of _them_ , but he only stood silently by the exit staring at me, looking _far_ too clueless.

"What do you mean. . ." His eyes studied my expression for a moment, and it took him quite a while for him to understand the accusation, "Wait, you think -"

"Stay back!" I screamed again, pressing my back against the wall after he made an attempt to move in closer.

"Rose, wait, it's not what you think! I didn't touch you at all I swear!" He tried to explain, his eyes shifting from me to the door as he spoke.

"You're not fooling me, West! Who else would -"

"Wally!" A woman's voice came from down the hall, "Is everything alright - Oh!" An older woman with auburn locks came peeking through the door, stopping the boy from letting it close shut after our eyes met, "She's finally woken up!"

"I've got it all under control Aunt I -" The redhead said, pushing the woman out before slamming the door, "Thanks for everything!"

"But don't you need me to -"

"No we're good now, thanks!" He yelled through his door and waited for the woman to stomp away before letting relief sweep over us, "Sorry about that."

"So that's your. . .?"

"Aunt Iris, she's the one who had you changed." He said and walked over to the closet to pull out the purple gown hanging inside.

"You swear?" I refused to let my guard down, even though I was almost sure he was speaking the truth. After everything that had happened tonight it didn't make sense for him to go from being a hero to a villainous creature after bringing me here. It didn't make any sense. . . but still - I needed a confirmation. I had to be certain or it'd drive me insane.

"I swear! Do you seriously think I'd do anything to you while you were unconscious? I might have done some pretty bad things on campus, but that's low even for me."

"I know I just. . . I'm sorry." I shook my head and reached for the gown he held in his hand, "Thank you, but I should be heading -"

"No." He pulled the dress away, hiding it behind his back to keep me from taking it, "There's no way you're going anywhere right now. If my uncle sees me driving this late he'll kill me."

"Then I'll take a bus -"

"There aren't any coming at this hour."

"Then I'll walk home!" I tried reaching again, irritated with his uncooperative behavior, but was stopped by his quick movements in keeping me away from taking the dress.

"And risk getting stuck in another dangerous situation - no way! You might be good at playing tough, but you won't be able to keep that up walking around in a city at night. You're still a girl!"

"Why do you care!?" I laughed at the irony, "That didn't seem to matter when you were helping out stacy with her little game tonight -"

"I had nothing to do with that!" He snapped, trying to contain his anger by steadying his breathing, "I didn't know about any of it. Yeah, I probably _should_ have kept a closer eye on you, but if I had known what would have happened, do you honestly think I would have ever let you go running off on your own like that?" His eyes caught mine, guilt and sincerity shimmering through, making it clear that all he'd been speaking was truth. The honesty that spilled from within him, and the pain he sent through his words, made my heart ache at the mess I took part in making. It was time to understand that he meant no real harm, even if he couldn't be trusted, he was always honest. . .

"I get it, okay? But I can't just stay here -"

"But you can't leave now either?" He said, refusing to let the weakling, he thought stood in front of him, leave this room. There's no way anyone would let a girl like Rose Adam's go out on her own like this without fear of possible danger, even if she never really existed. As long as she was the being I claimed to be then I'd need to see it through all the way, because without jinx, Rose was nothing. . . like always.

"Alright, fine. Then I'll just take the couch." I said, heading for the door only to be blocked again by the redheaded idiot.

"I'll take the couch. You can just rest here." He stared me down, refusing to give me any chance at leaving without his knowing.

"Fine. . ." I sighed in defeat and sat over on the edge of the bed to let him have his win, "It doesn't really matter anyway." I shrugged, and fell back to lay on the mattress.

"Oh, before I forget -" He began, tossing the gown over my face before moving to the other end of the room, "You'll need this."

"Need what!?" I pushed the gown on to the floor, annoyed by his presence, and sat myself back up to find him standing beside me with a phone in his hand.

"Take it." He said, waving the device in my face for me to reach for.

"I don't need it." I declined, pushing the black flip phone away from me.

"Really? You're still saying that after what happened tonight? This whole mess could have been avoided if you had a phone to call for help, ya know?"

"I didn't need help." I said, my pride standing in the way of accepting that he may have been right.

"Right? Because nearly dying proves how well you are at handling everything alone?" He said, sarcastically.

"So I'll be more careful now. I don't need a stupid -"

"Rose. . ." There it was again, just like before. My name spoken from that of another, yet it reminded me of someone else, "Please." He said urgently, kneeling down to place the device in the palm of my hand with eyes watching me the entire time to see what I'd do next. I could have kept refusing, ignoring the worry in his tone, but I was too weak to do that. The sound of him calling me by that name gave me a strange sense of nostalgia, and it brought me right back to the hero that had been chasing me for months. It was obvious they were nothing alike, in fact they were complete opposites, but for some strange reason he reminded me so much of the child I met that night before I was taken. And as crazy as that may have seemed, I couldn't resist when it came to _him._ How could I? When in my eyes he'd been, and always had been. . .

Hope.

"Fine, but won't _you_ need it?" I asked, hesitant to accept something from someone I knew very little about.

"Nah. It's a back up my aunt made me carry around as a kid. The only time I ever use it is when I occasionally lose my phone around the house."

"Who loses a phone in their own house?" I asked shortly.

"Well. . ." He laughed nervously, "I wouldn't exactly say lose it, but I tend to misplace it from time to time and forget where it is. . ."

"Wow, a genius in science but an idiot when it comes to basic necessities. That's just sad." I tisked, shaking my head at the boy who stood back up pouting like a child.

"Biology and losing a phone are two different things." He said and crossed his arms over his chest. I rolled my eyes and stared down at the device in my hands, smiling at the thought of him in my head. It surprised me how far the two of us had come, I had gone from hating the idiot to tolerating him, and then hating him again. Now, I wasn't sure what I felt, or whether I trusted him or not, but one thing was certain. He saved me. He gave me the opportunity to finish what needed to be done, the chance to return home safely, and even if our bond wasn't as close as before, I was truly grateful. And that was something I'd never felt towards any civilian, and I never expected to. . .

Until now.

"Why'd you do it?" I forced myself to ask, my curiosity yearning for the answer after tonight's events.

"Do what?" He stared, letting his hands drop back to his side.

"Why'd you save me? You said you didn't want to disappoint anyone, but you threw that all away by yelling at the crowd like that. . . why?"

"I thought you were asleep when that happened?" He furrowed his brow, suspicion shooting through his eyes.

"Partly, but what did you expect? I couldn't get any _real_ rest with you yelling like that?" I explained, yawning at the idea of rest, "So, what was your reason?" I asked again, but it took him a while to answer. He stared at me, making it slightly uncomfortable to lock eyes, and eventually he just gave in. A smile formed on his face and a soft chuckle escaped before he moved in to sit beside me.

"Isn't it obvious, dweeb." He turned to me, nudging my arm, "Because we're friends." My eyes grew wide in shock as I thought back to the masked hero I'd befriend as a child. It was strange how much he reminded me of the other, and perhaps that was a part of the reason I was always drawn back in, but I knew it wasn't just that. It wasn't the fact that Wally was similar to Rudolph that I enjoyed his company, in fact, it was more than that. He had his own charm that made him different, even if it irritated me most days, it made them different. And that's what I needed. I wasn't Rose anymore, which meant I couldn't have the hero now, but the girl I'd become had found something else instead. Something inside the redhead that no one else seemed to possess, and even though I couldn't explain it, it triggered something within me a long time ago. Something that felt almost welcoming. . . and I liked that.

"Friends huh?" I smiled at the idea of it, hoping it would last much longer this time.

"There it is! Another one of Adam's famously rare smiles!" He laughed, moving in closely to stare.

"Stupid." I rolled my eyes at the idiot beside me and pushed him away.

"Sorry, Sorry," He smiled and backed away before returning his gaze to the floor, "Listen, I know this doesn't change anything. It was wrong of me to have let any of this have gone so far in the first place. But I am sorry. . ." My eyes snuck over to glance at his saddened expression, and I sighed at the thought of remaining upset with him any longer. It was pointless in holding onto anger towards someone like him, even if our trust was still hanging by a thread, forgiveness would be the first step in mending what had been broken.

"I know, it's fine. It's not like any of it was ever really your fault. No one could have stopped Stacy from doing all of this, her obsession with you was something even she couldn't control. . ."

"It's not her fault." He muttered, taking in a deep breath before turning to me, "I'm the one who started all of this. If it weren't for me then she never would have -"

"What are you talking about?" I asked, cutting him off to head straight to the point of all this nonsense. He seemed hesitant to say anymore, falling down on the bed to stare at the ceiling, pondering on the idea of what needed to be spoken.

"She did it because I lied to her."

"Lied about what?" I asked, watching him over my shoulder and giving him the time and space he needed before releasing whatever plagued his mind at the moment. He took a deep breath where he laid, his chest rising after inhaling, and once he'd let it all out the words just came flowing after.

"Back in middle school, I used to be your basic regular nerd with decent grades and a couple of friends. Then I met Stacy. . ." He paused for a moment and shut his eyes, hands shaking where they laid, "She was always popular with the guys on campus, but she only had eyes for me after we met. She said she saw _potential_ in me, and that I should move over to her crowd instead. I didn't want to let her down so. . . I just did whatever she wanted."

"Meaning?" I squinted, uncertain with what he was implying.

"Just everything, dating, joining the football team, taking over the school - everything. She pushed me to rise to the top for her, and I did, but what she really wanted was to keep me tied down to her. . ."

"Because she loved you, right?" I asked, and he nodded in response.

"Things got messy when I told her I couldn't belong to her. It was impossible for me to be tied down to anyone. That's why I promised her if it couldn't be her then it'd be no one. I swore I'd never get attached to anyone and I meant it at the time but. . ." His words trailed off, and there was deep silence for a moment until he sat himself back up, "But I might have been wrong about that too." He stared at me, hard and serious that it made me want to turn away in fear of what would be said next.

"W-What do you mean?" I stuttered, staring at the bed sheets clutched in my hands when he swooped in to place his own over mine.

"Adam's, there's no doubt in my mind that you're undeniably _annoying_. I can't stand you're sarcasm most days, you're rude, depressing, and you never listen to anything I have to say. . ."

"Yeah well you're -"

"But at the same time," He tried to finish, "Despite my efforts in trying. I can't seem to get you out of my head." He caught me off guard, and for a second I'd forgotten how to breathe. The shock that had struck me after his strange confession forced all thoughts out of my head, and everything had suddenly just. . .

Stopped.

"What are you saying?" I whispered, but he didn't answer. Instead he took my hand and entwined our fingers, eyes watching me as if to study my reaction to it all. He seemed slightly more careful with me then I'd expected, or ever expected from anyone of the opposite gender, and appeared hesitant when pushing the strands of hair covering my face. Maybe it was all in my head, and I was imagining the whole thing, but the way he moved was similar to how the others treated me at home from time to time. Afraid I'd break if they did anything without any warning, and that's exactly what he seemed to be doing. It was as if he knew about me, about before, and even. . . about _that room_.

I made no effort to move, not wanting to break the peace created by our silence. Still, he continued forward after closely watching me for a few minutes. The ticking that passed staring into each others eyes was a sign that he'd keep going, and he did. He leaned in closely, watching me until my eyes had slowly shut on their own. It took me a while to register the moment but when it did everything else had left us. The world didn't even exist with our eyes closed shut, it was just us, only us. And as he came down and placed a tender kiss on my lips it felt true. We were all that mattered, all that were, even in darkness because here we existed. . . we lived.

He caressed the side of my face softly, pulling me in his embrace to deepen the kiss. The intensity of it grew stronger, and far more passionate, after we'd fallen back down on the bed. He laid over me, my hands settled on the mid of his back, with our lips kept placed over one another. He held me carefully, treated me gently, with fingers tangled in my hair, and it was nice. To be treated with care, as if my entire being meant something far more to him, something another found precious. It wasn't forced, or out of lust and greed. It was for the sole purpose of care and affection. That's what it was. He wasn't like _them_ , he couldn't be. . . but still. . .

The moment our bodies were pressed together he ventured further. His hands crept inside my top, sneaky and familiar. . . just like _them_. My mind shot back into survival mode, and I'd lost all sense of control once again. I tried to pull away, turning my face in the opposite direction to gasp for air, and kicked him off of me. My screams escaped on their own, something my brain had been programmed to do in these situations. To beg for help and mercy, then after failing, shut off and give in. Play the dead girl no one bothered to search for, the girl no one wanted to see again.

 ** _Just. Play. Dead._**

His body fell off the bed after being kicked off, but once my screams were let out he came rushing back. My thoughts expected him to silence my screams first, then finish the job. That's what they'd done. What they'd all done before. But, instead, he jumped over me and held me in his embrace.

His methods frightened me, something that had never been done in the past, but he wouldn't release me and that triggered panic every time. So I screamed, I yelled, and I cried - cursing my own fate. Only a fool would have allowed herself to get caught into another trap like this, and that's what I was - a fool. Foolish enough to dream, to hope, and wish that it'd be different. But it was the same, he was the same, so why. . . Why did he stop?

"I'm sorry. . ." He whispered into my ear, and just like that, the screams stopped. "I get it now." I heard him say with arms wrapped around me tightly. I wasn't sure with what he meant, or what he was planning, but the tears continued pouring out on their own, blurring my vision and setting me far back to escape from whatever he had planned.

"Let me go. . ." I sobbed, pulling on his shirt and desperately trying to push him off.

"Who did it?" He asked in a whisper, making my heart drop after pulling me back from my memories.

"D-Did what?"

"Don't!" He shouted, irritation laced with his voice, and I flinched in response. "Don't do that. Don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about." He hissed, releasing me slightly to move up and find my eyes again.

"West just stop-"

"Who did it, Rose!?" He asked again, angrier than before. I was uncertain at who his anger was directed toward, and I forced myself not to ask, but I was more confused with why it upset him so much. This meant nothing to him, connected him in no way possible, yet he kept trying to pry it out of me, trying to break through everything I'd piled up to keep everyone out. . . Why?

"I don't know what you're implying. . ." I murmured. Partly trying to convince myself that there was no need to say anything. That it didn't matter because it never happened. If it was never spoken then it couldn't be real. That was my theory, that was how I got through, how I'd learned to cope with it. If I thought or said anymore about it at this point then I'd have to accept it. . .

And that was the _last_ thing I wanted to do.

"You going to keep playing dumb? Or do I have to say it out loud to get an answer-"

"Don't say it." I threatened, glaring into sapphire eyes hovering over me, "Don't you dare."

"Then tell me who?" He persisted.

"West just drop it!" I squirmed underneath him, struggling to break free from his tight grip without my powers.

"No! Because I can already tell that if you won't tell me, then you haven't told anyone else either! Which means whoever did it is still out there!"

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"Then tell me the truth!" He yelled in my face, roughly gripping both wrists to keep me from escaping, "Who was it? Who raped y-"

"Stop!" That was it. I snapped. I needed to escape, I needed to get out of there - now.

I kneed him directly in the groin and kicked him off after his grip had loosened. He fell off the bed and crashed onto the ground, groaning in pain, and I used the only opportunity I had to race for the door and leave. I had to, I needed to, even if I didn't want to. This wasn't how I wanted things to go. I shouldn't have been upset with him, I didn't want to leave things on bad terms after what he'd done for me. I wanted to thank him. I wanted to be honest with him, with _myself_. But I ruined that. The _universe_ ruined that. Proving that no matter what, it would never allow me to find happiness. It wouldn't grant me bliss or bless me with sweet dreams. It destined me into a lifetime of nightmares and darkness. That was my fate. . .

There was no escaping it.

"No!" I heard him yell from the ground, and I made the mistake to glance back and make sure he wasn't badly hurt. If I hadn't I probably would have been able to make it out to the hall, but the moment I stopped out of concern for him he used it to his advantage to keep me inside. It happened _fast_ , _too_ fast for me to even comprehend what had even _happened_ , but he managed to push himself back up, rush over, and grab my arm before I could even _touch_ the door.

How he did it was difficult to explain, or even understand, but he had me trapped. He slammed his hand over the door, keeping it shut, and left me without a choice. I gave up. I had to give up. There was nothing I could do as long as I was in this form. Nothing at all. . .

"Please. . ." He whispered in my ear, standing behind me with my arm in his hand, his breath shuddering as he spoke, "Just tell me the truth."

"When did I ever lie?" I scoffed, wrenching my arm out of his hold.

"I never said you lied," He stepped closer, whirling me around and grabbing my upper arms to pin my back against the door, "But you're not being honest."

"Why do you care!?" I stared up at him, mustering up what little was left of my courage despite the terror leaking into my heart by his strange behavior, "My life shouldn't concern you."

"But it does!" He said loudly, "Even if you feel that way I have to know, I need to know! You told me before that there was nothing anyone could do to hurt you anymore. Why? What did they do to you? Who was it that did it? What was their name-"

"I don't know!" I shoved him away from me, stifling a sob and letting myself drop to the floor. I brought my knees to my chest at the sudden realization of my answer. I had buried those memories in the deepest part of my mind that I never noticed. All this time, all those men, and I had never even once thought to figure out who they were. They were just strangers to me, demons, who came in with lustful desires whenever they met with me. It never bothered me until now, never knowing who they were. And that made me feel even more ashamed, filthy, and damaged. . .

"What do you mean?" He came down to sit beside me, eyes watching me until I hid away between my knees.

"I don't know. . ." I choked on the tears that had escaped on their own. How disgusting that must have sounded to someone like him. How disgusting I must have looked in his eyes now. A worthless, filthy, whore. . . Stacy was right. I deserved everything that came my way.

"Adam's. . ." He whispered for me, but the room fell silent again. And then, suddenly, I was brought into his warm embrace. It was only moments ago he hated me, yelling at me in anger, but now it was different. _He_ was different. He was gentle, and kind, and nothing like I'd expected out of the school's villainous hero. I didn't understand him at all, or what he was thinking. Did he hate me? Was he disgusted by me? Or was it something else? Something less? Or something more?

"I never saw their faces. . ." I thought out loud, going through the events in my head, "I just did what I was told. I never wanted to. . . to. . ." My sobs stopped me from saying anymore, shaking my head to stop myself from reliving those moments all over again. I shouldn't have said anything. I shouldn't have even gone out tonight. Every decision I made always led me down something far worse. I just needed to stay focused on what the other's wanted, what they needed, and then I'd survive. If I couldn't fight the darkness I had to become _it_ , but how was I suppose to continue doing that when I was with _West_. The misunderstood bully on campus who seemed to be the only one who always knew how to light my path, just like Rudolph had done once before.

"I'm sorry. . ." He cooed softly, running his hands through my hair as he held me in his arms.

"For what?" I hiccupped, pulling back to look up at the redhead who stared down at me and sighed.

"Everything." He mumbled and released me to stand up on his own. He disappeared into the closet after walking over to enter, and came out seconds later with a blanket in his hands, "I'm going to get some sleep. You're probably tired too, so you should get some more rest." He told me, taking my hand and helping me back up on my feet to open the door. The idea of escaping seemed possible for a moment. The second he left I could climb out the window and head home, forget the whole school thing and focus on what I was really good at - destruction. That was the smart decision, the right decision. . . but was it the decision I truly desired? I tried to convince myself it was, but my mind just kept going back to him, _watching_ him reach for the door. If I did this it would be the end, goodbye for good. After all, nothing good would come out of us spending anymore time together, I was well aware of that. . .

So why did it bother me so much?

"West, wait!" I latched onto his arm, pulling him back from leaving the room. This was a mistake. A major one. My entire brain kept signaling to abort. It kept yelling that it wasn't too late to stick to the plan. Still, I couldn't stop myself. I didn't want it to end. I didn't want to walk away just yet. Not yet. . .

"What's wrong?" He creased his brow, just as confused as I was by my strange actions.

"I just. . ." I paused, thinking over what needed to be said before making the final decision, "I just, I can't sleep in the dark by myself. My brothers bedrooms are right next door to mine, so I know they're always nearby but. . . but if you go downstairs I won't be able to. . ." My face flushed in embarrassment at what had just been said. I had transformed from being the hive fives fearless leader, to a childish coward in mere seconds. What was wrong with me? This wasn't what needed to be done, it wasn't what I wanted, so why? Why couldn't I keep calm with him around?

He blinked at me, clearly shocked by my statement, and I wanted desperately to take back what I said and jump out the window like before. Then, suddenly, but not surprisingly, he began to laugh. The same laugh I had heard before, and one I never thought I'd hear again. It was nice whenever he smiled, and the sound of his laughter soothed me strangely. It was like, whenever he did that it gave off a refreshing atmosphere, and it made it seem like everything would be okay. Even if things went bad, and it was clear they would only get worse, his smile gave a sense of hope. . . And I liked that part of him. I liked it a lot.

"Okay, princess." He said jokingly, shutting the door behind him before leaning down to press a chaste kiss on my forhead, "I'll protect you from the night ghouls." He teased, winking at me to try and get me to laugh. But, in the end, he received the opposite.

"You. . ." I kicked his knee and watched him fall on the ground again, holding his leg close to his chest to moan in agony.

"Why'd you do-"

"Because you're an idiot." I snarled, and returned to the bed to lay back down, "Enjoy sleeping on the floor." I grumbled, and hid myself underneath the sheets.

"Not like I was expecting to sleep in the bed either way."

"Good!" I yelled.

" _Good_!" He repeated mockingly, before shutting the lights off and shuffling over to the center of the room. "Goodnight Rosie~" He sang, intentionally trying to irritate me even at night.

"Go die West." I mumbled through the sheets, burying my face in one of the pillows behind me.

"Ungrateful freak."

"Annoying Pest." I tried to say, but the words came out muffled through the pillow blocking my mouth. He laughed at the sound of it, and I couldn't help but do the same. It was nice. He was nice. And for once, I actually enjoyed being with someone other than my teammates. Someone different then the group of people I usually associated with. . . and it was nice.

"Goodnight, Adams." He whispered aloud in the darkness and the room returned to it's usual silence again. I smiled to myself and shut my eyes to let sleep take me for the rest of the night.

"Goodnight, West." I whispered softly, barely audible for him to hear, and that's how I wanted it.

I'm not sure what it was that had me sticking around. Maybe it was because I felt I owed at least this much to him after saving my life. After all, it's thanks to him I get to continue what I'd been planning. I get to keep breathing to take care of the others. And it was all thanks to the great _Wally West_. That had to be why, it just had to be. Why else would I stay. It wasn't like I could feel anything for the redhead, even if I wanted to. I wasn't human, I wasn't normal, I was a freak - a monster. I needed to keep that in mind, always. But for the first time, despite how weak and defenseless it felt at times, I enjoyed playing this role. I liked pretending to be the girl I should have been, even if I couldn't have been, because for the first time, Rose Adam's made me feel alive again. Like she was reborn again. And I desperately wanted to keep things that way. To stay like this, with him, for as long as I could even if it couldn't be forever. We'd eventually need to say our goodbyes, that was inevitable, but still. . . Part of me wished that maybe, just maybe, there was still a chance. There was still hope that things could remain this way, just the way they are now, forever, and maybe even. . .

 **Always.**


	33. Chapter 32: Clouded Truth

Chapter 32: Clouded Truth

Kid Flash

The morning rays crept through the curtains and restored it's natural light into the room. The annoying beeping of my alarm clock didn't seem to bother the Adam's girl even the slightest, no matter how long it buzzed. She was exhausted, which wasn't shocking due to last night's incidents. She just laid there, almost peaceful like if you ignored the shuddering breaths she inhaled occasionally.

Thin locks of dark hair hung from her pillow with smalls strands that fell over her shoulders, and I couldn't help but smile down at the girl who appeared somewhat like a child cuddling close to the pillow in her arms. Her face relaxed, eyes closed and lips slightly parted. She was beautiful. She always was, but I hadn't paid much attention to it until just recently. And if it hadn't been for the team's morning practice, I could have spent hours just standing there, watching her sleep. It relaxed me to see her that way, to have her safe and in my sight where there was no danger, where I could protect her. That way no one could ever hurt her again.

 ** _No one_**.

"Hot. . ." I heard her mumble in her sleep, suddenly clutching onto the pillow in her arms, and I kneeled down to listen closely to anything more she had to say. But my eyes caught on to something more important. A thin layer of sweat was visible on her forehead and that was concerning due to the fact that the temperature in the house wasn't even close to being _warm_ , it was actually quite the opposite.

I placed a hand over her forehead and on my own for comparison, but it was clear she was burning up with a fever. She was sick and it was my fault - again. I couldn't even make it back to the house fast enough to get her dried off quicker, and now she was ill. What good was I to her if I couldn't do that much? I couldn't save her from Stacy's wrath, I abandoned her when she needed me most, and now I had put her health at risk too. She was right. . .

I _am_ an idiot.

"Wally are you still-" My aunt's voice came through the door, pushing it open to step in and stop to look at me and the girl still laying in bed, "Oh? She really did stay the night?" She stared, closing the door behind her to walk over to us.

"Yeah, but she might be sick. I don't know what to do and I have practice to get to, so what am I-"

"Wally, breathe," My aunt smiled, placing her hands on my shoulders to gently shake me, "I'll take care of her. You just focus on getting everything else done."

"But-"

"No but's. I'll watch over her and drop her off, and I'm sure she'll understand why you needed to leave. Just trust me on this." Her words relieved part of my troubled mind, knowing everything would always be okay whenever she had things taken care of, but my mind kept redirecting me to last night. To the moment I thought I'd lost her for good, and that there was still so much I needed to say to her, things I hadn't fully expressed last night because of how bad it had gotten. I didn't want her to wake up and find me gone. I didn't want her to think of me as some sort of flake and that everything that happened last night was a lie, like it never meant anything, or that I was like. . . like one of _them_.

Whoever _they_ were.

What they'd done was unforgiveable and it kept eating at me no matter how hard I tried to ignore it, but the thought that someone else had done something like that to her, something to intentionally hurt her, break her, and destroy her that way. . . it was unforgivable. And it pissed me off. The whole idea of anyone laying a hand on her that way, or in any way, but _especially_ in _that_ way pissed me off more than anything else because of how badly it affected her. This was something she was battling alone all this time, and no one had noticed, not even me, yet I let them test her limits. I let them mess with her, toy with her feelings, and made it even harder for her to get by. . .

What kind of monster had I become?

"I don't know, Aunt I. . ." I sighed, debating whether or not it was best for me to leave it all in her hands, "Maybe I should just call in sick and-" I was cut off by the doorbell's tune that rang and brought us both staring at the staircase.

"You'd better go get that." She grinned, waving me off to get me out of the room no doubt. But I didn't argue and did what she said, stepping out and rushing to the front door to see who it was that would be coming in this early.

It could have been anyone really, the mail man, the salesmen, the neighbors, or even my Uncle who left his key behind by mistake. That's why I didn't bother checking or hesitating to open the door without a second thought. However, the person standing at my doorway was someone I'd never expected to come out this far on his own. But there he was, jump city's heroic leader, standing with a folder in his hands and his usual shades.

"Wally!?" He seemed slightly panicked to find me standing there, quickly hiding whatever it was he was holding behind his back, "Why are you here?" He jumped, and I furrowed my brows at the ridiculous question he had just asked.

"I live here genius. You know that. The real question is, why are you here?"

"Well, I, Um. . ."

"Dude." I stared him down, watching him fidgeting where he stood, "What's going on?" I asked, demanding to know what he was clearly hiding from me in my own city. He seemed quite hesitant to share what was on his mind, which was odd in most cases, but it meant that there was something he didn't want me to know. At least, not now anyway. . .

"You were suppose to be at practice. I was planning on meeting with your Uncle, but he's probably going to share this with you anyway so. . ." He sighed in defeat, revealing the folder he had hidden behind him and handing it out for me to take, "Here."

"What's this?" I asked, taking and examining the thing before bothering to look at what it was that was meant for me to read.

"Their _her_ files. The ones the police couldn't find."

"Who's?" There was a moment of silence as I stood ready to open the file, but the blank look on the other teens face made me feel far more nervous to see it for myself. Then, the silence was broken. And the moment I heard him speak her name everything had started to crumble on its own. . .

"Jinx." The sound of her name made my ears ring, blocking out all sound and noise around me. The answers I'd been searching for were now in my hands, _literally_. I now had the opportunity to piece everything together if I wanted to. I could fix what I'd done wrong, put an end to her madness, and save her this time. I could do it, I could but. . .

Would she even let me?

She made it pretty clear before that she wanted nothing more to do with me. Even if I could find a way, she wouldn't listen to me. Her pride was too big to stop her from backing out in whatever it was she had planned. There was no harm in trying, but, would it really change anything? At this point it seemed pointless now. My help was needed when she was a child, but she'd chosen her own path now. I couldn't change her or force her to become someone she wasn't. She made her choice, and I made mine, that meant no one could stop either of us. In the end my mind kept going back to one answer, and one answer only. . .

It was time to _give up_.

"How did you get this stuff?" I looked back at the ebony haired boy after my eyes had left the ground, "If the cops couldn't even get it, or me, how could-"

"Did you forget that I live in the same house with the worlds greatest detective? I just called in a favor when your Uncle asked for help. He said you were too scared to ask me yourself, which I thought was ridiculous because we're suppose to be best friends. I thought you trusted me better than that?" He frowned, scolding me behind his shades with his arms crossed over his chest. There was a part of me that wanted to go off on the man who had decided to blab all of this, but at the same time I knew the only one who needed to be yelled at was me. Dick was right, I should have trusted him more. I should have known better. I made the mistake in hiding everything about this girl that it had forced me to drive a wedge between me and my best friend. It wasn't jinx's fault, or my uncles, it was mine. I needed to accept that. It was always my fault because of the reckless decisions I kept repeatedly making. . .

But not this time.

"You're right, I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you but I guess I got worried for no reason. I'm sorry. . ." There weren't enough apologies to make up for all I'd done recently. They wouldn't fix the damage I'd caused with jinx, or stacy, my family, my friends, or Rose. . . it just wouldn't be enough. It'd never be enough. . .

"Alright, it's fine," He groaned, shaking his head before turning back to the streets, "Just quit trying to handle everything alone. That's why you have us to lean on. Don't hesitate to ask for help sometimes." The boy wonder waved, heading for the black vehicle parked in the front of the house, and I couldn't help but laugh at the irony of the hero's words as he drove off in the backseat of the car driven by the great Alfred of Wayne Manor. . .

 _"You can take care of yourself, I get that. But asking for help sometimes doesn't make you weak."_

There was no doubt in my mind that I was probably the biggest hypocrite to ever walk this earth. I kept lecturing jinx and rose about what not to do, when I myself kept slipping up in doing the same thing. I wasn't perfect, nor was I any better than those locked away behind bars, but I wanted to change that. I needed to change that and become someone honest, because I'd been lying for far too long. Why I chose to suffocate myself behind a mask I never enjoyed wearing on campus was something I never fully understood, and maybe would never understand. But I do know that helping people is what I'm best at, it's what I'm passionate about, even if it meant putting my own life at risk. I wanted to make people happy, but I went about it the wrong way by ruining myself in the process.

 _That was over now._

I was going to change. I was going to get better. I was going to improve and do what I wanted to do. And what I really wanted was to make _her_ happy. I wanted to make her proud because that's what would satisfy me. The answer as to Why, was still unclear, but there was nothing else I could do to change how I felt at this point. Despite how annoying she got at times, I liked that. I liked all of it, everything that made up who she was, because I liked her. That's all I was sure about, and all I'd ever be sure about. . .

 _Her_.

"Okay, Wally-" My aunt said, coming down the stairs, "I got her a cold towel to keep over her head, and I'll make sure she takes some medicine after she wakes up. So everything should be good for. . ." She paused for a moment after reaching the final step and stared at the opened entrance, "Who was at the door?"

"Oh, just a friend." I shrugged, tossing the folder over my bag placed in the corner after shutting the door, "He just dropped off my notes for a quiz tomorrow." I lied, sitting down at the table to rest for what little time I had left before leaving.

"Wally about your friend, the one upstairs. . ." The woman began, gliding toward me to take the seat next to mine, "How much do you know about her?" She asked, eyeing me suspiciously as if there was something more I was hiding.

"Not much? I mean, we're lab partners and stuff."

"Uh huh, so then, there's nothing going on between the two of you?" She asked again, raising her brow and waiting for me to say something that even I wasn't fully sure of just yet. That kiss last night may have meant more to me than it did to her, but it didn't confirm anything at all. So, all I really could say was the truth. There was nothing more going on between us because we were. . . we were. . .

"We're just friends."

"But you've never let any female spend the night here. Not that I'm complaining but-"

"She's special." I told the woman pestering me with her annoyingly immature behavior, and I got out of my seat to ignore the twinkle in her eyes at hearing me say something even I myself never expected to admit. I had planned to never let another woman into my heart, that I would pledge my loyalty to the child I couldn't save years before, and I was prepared to live out my years alone. That was the plan. That was what I wanted. At least, that was what I _thought_ I wanted. Until she came along and knocked that all down with her irritatingly harsh attitude. She knocked sense back into my thick skull when no one had ever dared to even try. But she did, and she won. There was no point in trying to beat her now, when I no longer had the energy to fight or resist against whatever it was that stirred within me the moment she appeared. . . and I didn't want to.

"I knew it!" The woman jumped, prancing around the room like a child before rushing toward me to pull me in her arms, "You've finally found it!"

"Okay, okay, Aunt I, enough." I whined, pushing the woman away to walk over and reach for my bag, sliding the file deep inside to keep safe, "This changes nothing. It's more one sided on my part anyway. It doesn't guarantee anything." I said, speaking more to myself than to the auburn haired woman watching me from the kitchen.

"Perhaps, but that doesn't mean you should give up so easily." She smiled, resting back in her seat to continue the conversation from there.

"You don't get it. I've messed up - a lot. There's no way anything could happen at this point now. . ."

"I'm not sure about that. After all, she trusted you enough to have you sleep in the same room with her. If she truly despised you she would have left a long time ago. . ." The woman began, leaning against her chair to stare up at the ceiling as she thought out loud, "We're not perfect, as much as we pretend to be. We all mess up at times, but It's how we learn to fix those mistakes that truly help us grow as people."

"Maybe you're right." I shrugged, returning back to the table to join her. I knew there had to be a reason the Adam's girl decided to go along with everything last night. It might not have been trust, but she must have had a bit of faith in me to let herself stay in some strangers home. Whatever it was, I wasn't complaining. In fact, it gave me more hope then I thought would ever be possible in just a short amount of time. I didn't deserve it, but I was glad she was able to open up to me as much as she'd done last time. Now, I just needed to be patient and wait until I could earn her forgiveness. I had to. If I couldn't I didn't know what I'd do. . .

"But, that wasn't what I was referring to. . ." The auburn haired woman spoke again, sitting back in her chair properly to meet my gaze. She was serious, her eyes said it all. Wherever she was going with this was unexpected, but for a childish woman like herself to behave in such a way gave me chills. Which meant, there was something else going on at this point, something bigger. . .

"What do you mean?"

"Wally, do you truly trust her?" She asked, her tone difficult to interpret due to her unusual behavior.

"Of course. I mean, she hasn't done anything for me to _not_ trust her. All she's done so far is cover for me whenever I slipped up. She's a good person. . ." My words trailed off after staring too long at the woman who studied me carefully in her seat, it was odd and unwelcoming, "Why? Do you think I shouldn't?" I tried to ask and watched the woman who did the same with me. The silence that filled the room felt uncomfortable seeing that it was exchanged between me and my own guardian. But after seconds of examining each other with our vision, she leaned back against her chair, shrugged her shoulders and smiled.

"I don't know her well enough to have an opinion just yet. It's your decision after all. . ." She said before stepping back up to head for the fridge. There was something off about the whole conversation, something different, something hidden. She wasn't sharing her true thoughts with me, which meant there was something more I didn't know about. Something she wasn't telling me. And I tried to ask her, quickly getting out of my chair to see what more there was to this, but before I could even say another word about it, the doorbell rang again. . .

"You'd better get that." She sang, sipping from a cup placed on the counter beside her. The conversation wasn't over, and I knew she was hiding something else, but I refused to argue with her after all the help she'd given me with Rose. And so, I did what I was told and stomped my way over to answer the door.

"Why can't you tell Uncle B to remember to take his keys with him whenever he. . ." My lecture directed at the woman in the kitchen was cut short when I flung the door open and found another unexpected visitor. The dark haired beauty of last night stood in front of me, smiling as if being here was a natural thing for her.

"Linda? What are you doing here?"

"I heard about today's morning practice, and I was wondering if you wanted a ride?" She offered, waving her car keys in the air.

"You drive?" I raised a brow.

"No, but I have a permit." She said quietly, her eyes flickering from me then to the other woman in the room watching us from the kitchen counter. There wasn't any real issue with getting to practice on time or not, whether it'd be taking her car or running over on my own, that wasn't the problem. The thing that kept bugging me was that I wasn't sure if I should leave or stay behind. I didn't want Rose to be alone with someone she didn't know all that well, and I wasn't in any rush to meet with my teammates after last night's incident, but I also didn't want to reject Linda without a good enough reason. Not after all she'd done for me and the dweeb upstairs. Still I. . . I couldn't decide anything on my own at this point.

"I appreciate the offer Linda, but I think I might hang here instead-"

"Please. . ." She whispered, desperation evident in her tone as she reached for my arm and held the door from being shut, "I have to tell you something."

"What do you. . ." I stopped myself from asking anything when I noticed her glance at the adult in the room with us. Whatever it was she needed to say, it was clear she didn't want anyone else to hear about it.

"Please." She mouthed before turning to smile at the auburn haired female sipping and staring behind us, "It was lovely to meet you." She told her and looked at me one last time before heading back outside.

"I'm leaving everything with you, Aunt I!" I yelled, rushing for my bag before following Linda down the driveway. My ears caught on to something the woman in kitchen the shouted after I'd gone running out, but I was too focused on everything else to pay any attention to her words.

I'd expected a conversation to start once we were outside. But she said nothing, and instead moved into the truck she had parked out in the front, and sat down in the drivers seat. I thought surely she'd say something in there, no one could bother us, there weren't any interruptions at all. But she said nothing. Then we started moving once we were both strapped in our own seats, and I thought maybe she just needed to drive a little further ahead to say what she came here to tell me. We passed down a few houses, then we rolled past the corner, we headed onto the street, and after minutes of driving. . .

There was still _nothing_.

I thought maybe it might have all been just one big lie to get me in her car. That she might have been trying to keep me to herself like all the others before her, this being her way of getting my attention. But that didn't make any sense. She wasn't like that, she never was. Yeah, she had made her feelings for me clear, but she wasn't childish enough to stoop this low. There was something else to this, something more. Something that was bothering her enough to have her plead for me to be alone with her, and that didn't seem at all like her style. Whatever was on her mind it was important. . . I just needed to figure out what _it_ was. And the moment the vehicle stopped to wait for a traffic light to turn green I took the chance to find out for myself. . .

"What's going on?" I tried to ask, breaking the silence emitted between us.

"I need your help. . ." There it was again, the same desperation as before.

"With what?" I asked the girl who stared hopelessly at her legs with her head bent down, hands slipping from off the steering wheel to fall on her lap. There was a second of hesitation as she sat quietly in her seat, far too quiet that it was almost impossible to even hear her breathe. Then, the sound of her deeply inhaling assured me that she was still here, she was still aware, and she was ready to talk. . .

"Rose." The sound of her name escaping her lips made my heart clench painfully. There were so many mixed emotions that brought along the sense of uncertainty whenever other's mentioned that name. Not only just for the pain I'd caused the Adam's girl, but for the same I'd forced onto the other who lived another city away. How I managed to screw both of them over was something I still couldn't wrap my head around. But I did. I hurt them. Both of them. But that wasn't the issue here. . .

"What about her?" I asked, staring straight ahead to view the street in hopes of distracting myself from whatever was piling up inside me.

"I haven't been completely honest with you, but there's something you should know about the two of us. . ." She slowly brought her head back up, her eyes staring into me as I did my best in avoiding her gaze by keeping my eyes focused on the stop light, "The truth is, the only reason I tried getting closer to you was because you were the only one who had gotten close enough to learn more about her. . ."

My eyes shot over to meet her own, anger boiling inside me and I couldn't do anything but laugh to mask my true emotions. It wasn't so much that she'd admitted to using me for whatever it was she'd been plotting, that much I could understand. That I could handle. What I couldn't take was the fact that she hadn't done it to get my attention like everyone else. No, this was different. She was after something else, someone else. And that someone just so happened to have been the girl she'd been helping me protect on campus. . . why? What was the point? What was she planning?

"What? Are you some crazy obsessed stalker? You wanted to get close to me to gather info on some chick so you could-"

"That's not it!" She screamed, slamming her hands on the steering wheel, "It wasn't like I was planning this whole thing from the start! When I first met you I wanted to be your friend, but then she approached you in the hall and I figured you just might. . ." She struggled to find her words, but everything that came flying out of her mouth didn't give me a clear picture to any of it. . . and that pissed me off.

"Are you in love with the dweeb or something? Because you said before that-"

"Dumbass it isn't like that!" She yelled, glaring at me in a way that seemed almost similar to that of the girl most likely still sleeping in my bedroom.

"Then what is it, Linda? You're not making any sen-"

"She's my sister!" Her words hit me hard and fast. It wasn't anything I'd expected to hear from anyone, _especially_ not her. It didn't match up right, none of it did. There was no way she could have kept that hidden from me. I would have noticed. I should have but. . .

"That's impossible. . ." I muttered to myself, refusing to acknowledge her relation to the Adam's girl in any way. They couldn't be related. They just couldn't. They were too different, in appearance and personality. It just didn't add up. . .

"It's true, Wally. We're sisters. . . at least, we used to be." She sighed, slumping in her seat with a frown painted on her face, "The system had us separated when our mother gave away her rights, but I searched for years. Everywhere and anywhere, and when I finally found her she wanted nothing to do with me!" She whined and turned her body toward me, reaching for my hand to continue begging, "That's why I need your help. You have to get her to talk to me and understand everything. If it's you then she'll definitely listen to-"

"Woah, wait!" I backed away, yanking my hand from her grip, "Why would I do that? Have you forgotten that I'm still in the doghouse too? We only just started talking again. If I mess that up by telling her _any_ of this then it might only make things worse on everyone! Besides, how do I know you're not lying? You can't exactly prove anything with words, and for all I know this could just be part of whatever scheme you might have going on in your head!"

"Proof?" She tilted her head to one side, blinking twice at the word, "So, if I can prove it to you, you'll help me?" She asked, and I pondered on the thought for a moment before answering.

"I'd. . . uh. . . take it under consideration?" I shrugged, scooting closer to the door ready to jump out of the car and ditch the craziness she had unleashed on her own at any moment.

"Okay, fine!" She said eagerly, reaching for her bag placed in the backseat to pull over on her lap. She rummaged through her belongings, tossing out books and folders she carried with her, including her wallet, as if they no longer held any significance to her. Then, after reaching the bottom, she pulled a small rectangular piece of paper and brought it up to my face, "But you have to listen to me after I show you, because there's more to the story then you might think. . ." She explained, and I could only nod in response before taking the paper in my hand and flipping it to reveal a photograph of three figures standing in the center.

There stood a family sitting under a willow near a lake. A mother and her two daughters, staring at the camera and whoever it was that shot them there. It was clear that the child with long dark hair, smiling in her mothers arms, was none other than the girl sitting beside me, watching me carefully. Maybe she already knew the truth, or maybe it was a habit of hers to keep watch on others at all times, but my reaction didn't seem to surprise her at all. And that sent chills running all over my body, because it wasn't her that was the main focus in this photo.

It was Rose.

No, it was more than just that. It was her mother too. The tall, slender woman with blue eyes and short black hair was someone I'd always been able to recognize through first hand encounters. The Russian witch wasn't a face I'd easily forget, mainly due to the obsession the pink haired feline in jump city held for her. She worshipped her, had her on this giant pedestal, and now I knew why. . . because of _this_. In this photo they stood together, Linda smiling, her mother scowling, and the other child glaring through the image. The child I'd never once forgotten, because of the years spent drowning myself in the memory of her. It was jinx. And jinx was Rose. But Rose was Linda's sister, and Linda's sister was. . .

"It can't be. . ." The photograph slipped from between my fingers, and I made no effort to stop it from floating down to the floor. I knew it couldn't add up, which meant it couldn't be true. Someone was lying, someone was hiding something, or there was something we were all misunderstanding. Either way, something wasn't right here. . .

"Wally, I know it might-"

"I have to go." I cut her off, refusing to listen to anymore she had to say about the matter without being able to fully process what was going on first. I jumped out of my seat and onto the street, running in the opposite direction of where the car stood with the only thought of escaping.

"Wally wait! You have to listen!" I heard her scream out her window as I ran at my slowest speed to maintain my identity as Wally West. But everything inside me kept screaming to forget that, to screw the whole thing and run as fast as I knew I could. My body, my brain, my heart - everything begged for me to do so. To find out the truth by confronting the one I truly questioned now by getting to her faster. . . but would that fix anything? Would she be honest? Was she even the one who was lying? But the photo said it all. Those three were linked together in some way, some how, but jinx. . . How?

Then, suddenly, I realized the answers might have been easier to find all along. Once I'd moved far enough to escape the girls view I pulled my bag off and reached in for what should have been the key to answering everything. It had to be. If there was anything I needed to know, then Robin would be sure to have found it himself. And that meant it was all held within the folder he'd left in my hands.

This was it. This was what I'd spent years searching for. The key to her existence, the proof that she had lived. Never had I ever expected it to be used for anything else but that. And just when I had decided to give up completely, she somehow found her way back into my life again.

My hands trembled the longer I spent staring down at the thing, and it took everything inside me to force it open. I think part of me might have known all along. That there was always this little whisper in the back of my head telling me it was her, that it wasn't just my imagination. The way they spoke, looked, behaved. It should have been obvious, yet I tried to deny it in order to create something new. Something special that hadn't been tainted by the mistakes of our past. . . but there was no escaping it. It'd been clouded, but it was always there, staring me in the face. And now it was clear, there wasn't even a need to look at anything else. This file belong to one villain and one villain only, and the first page gave it all away. . .

 **File Report**

 **Full Name: Rose Adams**

 **Alias: Jinx**

Those were the only words my eyes could focus on, and it was all I needed to remember. She existed, she lived, and she had been right in front of me all along. She had been running freely in my city without a care in the world, mocking me this entire time. She had played me, lied to me, but I wasn't going to let her win this time. She might have clouded my thoughts with her lies, but that would all end here - today. It was clear the one who had been playing games the entire time was her, and I had fallen right into it without even knowing. But not anymore. Now that I knew the truth I had the upper hand, and I was going to do whatever it'd take to bring her down. I wasn't falling for it again because this time. . .

 **I'd be the one to win.**


	34. Chapter 33: Exposed

Chapter 33: Exposed

Jinx

 _My screams echoed all around us along with my cries and whimpers. They were stronger than us, bigger, and smarter, every grown up was, that's why it was easier for them to control us, why we couldn't run away without being caught. We were being watched every second of every day we spent in this prison, and that didn't seem like it would ever change. Not ever. . ._

 _The cries of other children watching were mixed with that of my own as the group of adults held me down on the table in the center of the room. This was their dark room, just like Miss Amber had her own, and it appeared that every home carried one. A room where children feared to enter, a place where the sun could never reach us, somewhere close yet felt miles away from anywhere safe._

 _This was Hell._

 _They blocked out my cries by shoving a piece of cloth into my mouth, silencing me to keep from frightening the other children when I myself was still a child. There hands kept me stuck where I laid, despite my struggles in trying to escape, it was useless. I was no match for their strength. All I could do was remain still and accept what was to come. This was my fate. My destiny. There'd be no end. . ._

 _"Now!" One of them yelled, signaling whoever it was to finish what they had started. There was no hesitation, no one bothering to care what I had to say. I was their toy, their guinea pig, a test subject that, in their eyes, carried no soul. I was a monster - a pet. And so they did what humans always did to try and own their property, by marking what they claimed was theirs. . . me._

 _The burning sensation of heated iron was pressed against my skin, branding me to prove to the world, and myself, that this vessel was theirs. It was never mine to begin with, because it had always belonged to that of another. It had been, and would forever remain that way. My existence, my life, could never be mine. . ._

 _No one could change that._

 _I kicked and screamed in reaction to the pain. I begged for an end, any end, to the world I was forced into. I never had a say in this, or in how I chose to live my life. If I did then I would have gone about it differently. But that didn't matter. They didn't care about my pain, or the sadness pouring out of my eyes through tears. That was just it. I didn't matter. I couldn't. If I did then the world would never have treated me so cruelly. Whoever decided this upon me, whether it be god or the universe itself, all they wanted was to see me cry. To break me, torment me, as means of entertainment. . . but I wasn't going to let them win. I'd make them pay for everything, all of it, and avenge those lost in this prison. That was my purpose, the only reason for me to keep on living. . . it had to be. If not that then. . ._

 _What was the point?_

 _"Now toss her in the tube!" Another one yelled, shoving me off the table to fall head first on the ground. It was nice, it was cold, and right now that was what I needed. But I couldn't even enjoy that much, because I knew where they were taking me. The human sized tube, fit to carry any child inside, was flowing in the same pink water as before. There they'd keep me, drown me, and shock me in whatever experiment they were trying to complete. And no matter how much I begged, squirmed, and cried, they'd never listen. No one ever did. Why would they? After all, I was nothing to them. I never was. Just a vessel. An empty Vessel. An empty, broken, and tainted. . ._

 _Vessel._

 **"I'm leaving everything with you, Aunt I!"**

The redhead's voice rang through my ears and pulled me out of the nightmares of my past. If ever a distraction was needed, leave it to Wally West to do the job just. I couldn't think, let alone sleep, with his voice yammering outside the room. And the loud slamming of a door downstairs also helped in my fast awakening.

My eyes stared at the ceiling the long moment I spent laying in his bed. Everything in me felt weak and sore, and it was far more difficult for me than usual to pull myself back up. I was sick. That much I knew. The wet wash cloth placed on my forehead made it pretty clear too. I had made the reckless decision to show up last night and became too trusting that it had nearly gotten me killed. Not that it was my fault. If it hadn't been for _him_ I never would have gone out in the first place, I never would have said yes to that kid, and I wouldn't have put myself at any risk. This was his fault. He couldn't even get me home quick enough to save me from this fever. . .

"What an idiot." I tisked, thinking out loud after tossing the wet towel on the ground. I pushed myself out of bed, eyes falling on the hole in the wall as I forced myself back on both feet. It wasn't easy to maintain my balance, and everything around me was spinning in blurred colors, but I needed to leave. I hadn't reported in for hours which meant no one knew where I was, where I'd been, or who I was with. And it was all due to getting myself mixed up with some stupid jock on campus. . .

Even so, it wasn't all bad. It wasn't entirely his fault either. He was lost, that much was true, and he was uncertain with who he was or wanted to become. He had no clue at all, and I knew that for a while. Yet, I kept following him around without any reason to. Even if he had offered, I still could have refused to associate with him off school grounds. I didn't need to go out with him that day. If I hadn't then that kiss never would have happened, the video never would have existed, and last night would have turned out differently. . . but if that had happened, if we had never done any of that then. . . then what? I wouldn't be here, that much was true. But was that such a bad thing? Or was it good? If we hadn't gone out that day and that kiss had never happened, then last night's kiss never would have existed either. If I thought about it that way, then maybe, just maybe, it might not have been a complete loss. . .

Maybe.

My ears picked up on footsteps moving around below. My mind kept screaming it was him, that he was down there, waiting for me to wake up. And though part of me dreaded the idea of it, there was something inside me that secretly hoped it were true. I did my best to head for the door, not wanting to make too much of a fuss over the fever that was trying so hard to kick my ass. I just wanted to get down there, to see him and hopefully that would make everything better. . .

But when I'd reached the bottom step I couldn't find him anywhere. The only person who stood there was the woman of last night, staring through a window over the sink. My eyes searched for signs of the redhead nearby, not wanting to disturb the woman standing alone in the kitchen, but that came to be without any problems when she turned her head to look at me. A big smile grew on her face when our eyes met, and I tried to pull one on as well to mask how I felt about the awkward encounter.

"You're up!" She said, glancing at the window one last time before her eyes fell back on me, "You missed him by a second. He just drove out now." She explained, no doubt referring to the teen I was hoping to find in her place instead.

"Wally left?" I asked, feeling stupid for even asking such an idiotic question after what she'd just said.

"He has practice this morning. He felt awful about leaving you behind and he really wanted to stay, but I couldn't let him do that when he had people depending on him to get there on time." I felt slightly disappointed to hear he'd be gone, and I wasn't sure when he'd come back either. Which meant I wasn't sure when we'd get to see each other again and figure out whatever needed to be figured out. However, my heart felt lighter at the thought of him actually wanting to stay - just for me. That alone was enough to look past everything else, because it meant last night might not have just been one huge misunderstanding. That kiss. . . there was something else. That much I knew, even though knowing that would probably make things far more worse in the end. But still. . .

"It's fine, I understand. I was planning on leaving now after I got dressed anyw-"

"You can't leave!" She suddenly yelled, taking my hand in hers, "You're too sick to be walking around alone. You haven't even eaten. You should rest for as long as you need and have some breakfast. Then I'll be more than happy to drive you home." She said with another smile and pulled me toward the direction of the table placed in the kitchen.

"It's alright. I live pretty far so you don't need to-"

"I insist." She frowned, letting my hand slip from out of her hand, "I promised Wally I'd take care of you, and I really want to do that much. Especially after all you've done. . ."

"Me? But I haven't done anything?" I laughed awkwardly and slowly took a seat by the table she'd guided me toward.

"I don't believe that. You're special, I'm sure. You're the only girl he's ever let stay in this house for so long."

"I am?" I furrowed my brows at the thought of that being even remotely true, but the woman only nodded in response. I mean, I knew there were others, of course there were others, He was Wally West for god sake, the biggest man whore on campus. But this woman spoke about me as if she knew all about what her nephew had been up to in the past, and still made it sound like he was different. He had changed. And whether that was true or not, everything inside me begged that it was right. That she was right, because. . . that was what I wanted.

"So, have you two been dating long?" She asked, wiggling her eyebrows in a playful manner that somehow made the conversation feel even more awkward.

"No we aren't. . ." My words were lost in my throat when a sudden thought came through. Instead of asking myself why she would ask such a thing, I started questioning what made her think it in the first place. The whole 'never letting a girl stay here for too long' gave the impression that Wally only ever brought in those girls for his own lustful desires, but what about me? Was that why she asked? Did I come across the same way like all the others?

"We never did anything!" I tried to explain, waving my hands in defense, "Upstairs, we were only sleeping! I swear we never went beyond-"

"Calm down!" She laughed, patting my shoulder to stop me, "I know that already. You don't have to defend yourself, that wasn't where I was going with this."

"I'm sorry. . ." I mumbled, letting my head fall in embarrassment, "But we're just friends. . ."

"You're sure?" She asked, but even I couldn't fully answer that just yet. So, I nodded. Because that was all I could do to finish a conversation I wasn't prepared to talk about with him, let alone his guardian, "We'll leave it at that then." She smiled.

I stared at my legs due to the awkward tension between the two of us, and tried thinking of things to say to break the silence. But she took care of that when she pulled up a chair next to me, sat down, and let out a heavy sigh. She stared at her fingernails for a moment, almost trying to avoid looking at me when she opened her mouth to speak again, bringing the atmosphere to change dramatically in seconds. . .

"I was um. . ." She laughed, her words coming out as whispers until she made an attempt to speak again, "I noticed the scar on your lower back. . . last night when I was helping you undress. . ." My eyes shot up at the woman who's words made my heart drop. The mention of it terrified me as my brain scanned for ways of covering up something I hadn't planned on explaining to anyone outside of our group, "It was shaped into the number five and I was just worried. . . is everything alright at home? You're not in any danger or-"

"No, I live alone." I cut in, trying to keep calm and not come across suspicious in anyway, "That was something from a. . . long time ago."

"Is that so? What about your parents? Do they know about-"

"I don't have any. I was raised in the foster care system until I got emancipated. That scar was just a result of a bad home I was stuck in as a child. . ." That would be enough. It had to be enough. If she couldn't believe that much then I didn't know how far I'd need to go to get her to drop the subject.

"I'm sorry to hear that." That was all she said before we were forced to sit in tense silence for what seemed like an eternity. It was awkward and uncomfortable, guilt also poked at me for lying to a woman as kind as her. I glanced over at her from time to time but she just kept staring at her nails, rubbing them under her fingertips as the atmosphere remained the same. She wasn't going to speak up, or say anything more because she was scared. Scared like the others back home. Afraid of how I'd react and thus treating me like a piece of fragile glass she didn't want to break. Just the usual reaction to those who knew about me, even the slightest, because the littlest parts of my life were still enough to gain pity. . . and that irritated me greatly.

"It. . . it wasn't all bad. I met some amazing people along the way." I said with the image of Seymour flashing through my brain. This much was true, this much I was thankful for, because I had a family. It wasn't the ideal kind, or anything like ordinary families. But it was mine. They were mine and I was grateful for just that, because that was all I needed. It was enough.

"That's great to hear. I'm sure it must have been difficult, based on what I've heard from Wally's experience in the system too. I'm just glad that you gained something out of it."

"Wally's experience? But why would he have been placed in the system when he had you?" I asked, confused with her story and the one I'd thought up on my own. I assumed he was just some spoiled brat who got everything he wanted because of the loss of his parents. Never had I imagined that there could have been more to it then I had expected. It just didn't feel right, for someone like West to get stuck in the system like that. Why? How? It didn't make any sense. . .

"Well, my job required me to travel most days and because of that the court didn't feel I was a good fit at first. So he'd been staying with a stranger for a while until he was released in my care. That poor kid came out bawling when I picked him up. I can't even imagine how difficult it must have been for him - or you for that matter." I sat there in stunned silence, shocked by the tale of the redhead who I thought would have been some obnoxious brat growing up, and yet our past, though separate, weren't all that different.

"He never told me that. . ."

"Oops!" The woman covered her mouth, almost like that of a child who had spilled a secret she wasn't meant to share, "I thought you might have known. I mean, I thought you two might have shared that in common." She said, lightly smacking her head soon after.

"Well he mentioned the loss of his parents once, but I never thought. . ."

"I guess that's to be expected. He's not one to open up to others so easily. Not since he lost his little friend that - no I shouldn't be telling you this." She sighed, shaking her head in response to her own words.

"What friend?" I felt the need to ask, urging her to continue in telling me all there was to know about the teen who now appeared to be far more different then the way he portrayed himself on campus. There was always something off about his personality, but that was obvious due to the fact that he claimed to never want to disappoint anyone by being his true self. But who exactly was Wally West? What was it that made up everything he was? Why did he feel the need to please the universe when he himself felt miserable? There were questions I wanted answered, questions everyone probably had asked themselves before, but what was it. . .?

"There was just this child he used to go on and on about when he was younger. Someone he met when he was part of the system, just like you. Unfortunately, he got separated from her and spent days crying about it when my husband and I came to pick him up. What was her name again. . .?" The woman pondered on the thought for a moment, leaning in her chair to stop and think when her eyes suddenly travelled to the fridge, "Oh, there it is!" She smiled, rushing out of her seat to run over and pull off a photograph held up with magnets on the freezers door.

"There's what?" I asked, turning my entire torso in her direction.

"An old photograph taken from before the accident. . ." She said, smiling down at the tiny paper before looking back up to hand it out for me to see, "I don't have many with him and his parents, but this one's my favorite."

I wasn't sure if it was right to peek into the teens past without him around, I also didn't want to appear rude in the woman's eyes either, but my curiosity was something that had me going. I couldn't just say no, not just because it could hurt his aunt's feelings, but because I myself wanted to know all there was about the boy. It wasn't exactly something I could deny. After all, I did care for him on some level and it wasn't like we were total strangers. But the way he never mentioned any of this made me feel like just that. A stranger. Which made it almost unfair with how much I'd already shared with him the other night. This would make up for it, right? Of course it would. It was fair. . .

"What did you say your name was again, dear?" The woman asked after placing the photo in my hand.

"It's Rose. Rose Adams." I said, and brought the photograph closer to my eyes to get a clearer view of the child who stood with his parents smiling in the background.

" _Rose_?" I heard her mutter, but I was too focused on the image to say anything else.

They were standing by a table in a park, the same place he had taken me days before. I recognized it by the playground captured in the far end of where they stood. His parents seemed decent, but their expressions were false - forced even. It was a fake smile the two carried. That was something I picked up on instantly. I had seen enough of those in my lifetime to tell the difference between genuine happiness and lies. This was a lie. No doubt about that. But it was a nice picture. An ideal family. I envied the idea of it, of something I could never have. However, those thoughts were pushed away when I looked closely at the child smiling at the lens. It was his smile, his freckles, his hair, it was West. That was true, but it was more than just that. It wasn't just him anymore because. . .

Because it was Rudolph too.

My heart sunk into the pit of my stomach at my discovery. It was him. I was sure of it. That was a face I'd never been able to forget, not even once. There was no denying it, despite everything inside me that screamed it was impossible. It just didn't feel real. It didn't feel _right_. And my head kept whispering to me that it was a lie. That it wasn't true but. . . what if that wasn't the real lie? What if it was true, and everything else he'd said was false. The kiss, our friendship, saving me. . . it was all just one big lie! He'd been planning it from the start. This was his way of capturing me, luring me in to find out more about our plans. . . and I had fallen for it. I'd fallen for all of it. . .

Just like a fool.

"Hun, you don't look too goo-" My body flinched in response to her voice, and I pushed her away the moment she tried reaching for my arm.

"Get away from me!" I warned, abandoning the photo and my belongings in the house to race for the door. He'd known. He'd always known, which meant she knew too. She'd been in on it the whole time. That was why they'd kept me here, to control me, tame me, keep me imprisoned like everyone else. Whatever it was they were planning it had to be big, it just had to be. Why else would he have let me go so many times?

It was my own fault to have allowed myself to have gotten so close, so attached to someone who'd been treating it like a joke from the start. He was playing me, just like all the others. That's what he did. What he was best at. And I was the idiot to have hoped it could have ever been more than just that. I just needed to get out of there. I needed to escape before it was too late. Before I risked causing anymore damage.

So, I left everything there. My dress, my bag, my communicator - all of it. There wasn't enough time to escape with it all. I just rushed for the door, that was my main focus. To step out and leave without ever looking back. That was the new plan. That was how I'd survive this. And I was going to survive. There were people counting on me, depending on me, and I couldn't let myself get wrapped up in his lies any longer. I couldn't but. . .

The moment my hand reached for the handle I knew something was wrong. That something was coming, yet I ignored that and pulled it open anyway, ready to go running out. Then, just when I thought freedom was only seconds away. . . he was there. Proving me wrong once again by building and tearing down hope.

My mind didn't know how to react. It didn't know how to process the whole thing. But I did my best to swallow my fear in order to make it out of this alive. I wasn't going to let him beat me this time. I wasn't going to fall for his lies. Whoever he was, it would all end here. And as he stood there, blocking the exit, with a somewhat malicious grin on his face and a folder in his hand, I knew it wouldn't be easy. He wouldn't let it be, because he was all about the games. All about toying with those he found weaker than him. That was who he was, who his character had always been, people just never saw it hidden under his _heroic_ mask. But he was right about one thing. He was a fraud. He'd always been, and here I was picking up on the little clues he'd left for me to piece together. He was good, that much was true. He was great at playing the game. The only problem was that this time. . .

 **I wouldn't let him win.**

 **"Going somewhere, Rose? Or should I say. . . _Jinx_?"**


	35. Chapter 34: All I Need is You

Chapter 34: All I Need Is You

Kid Flash

The truth shall set you free. That's what we were taught. What the world had told us to believe. But what about a lie? What would that do? Imprison us? Destroy us? What? Even now, I still have no clue as to what the answer should be. But I'm positive that whatever it is, it would have led me some place far worse. However, the truth seemed to bring upon the same fate regardless of my decision. And that's where it had led me to today. . .

The door swung open before I could even touch the handle, but it brought me directly to the person I'd been wanting to confront since my newest discovery. We both stood facing each other, my body blocking her only exit while hers stiffened in response to finding me outside. We shared the same horror filled gaze for a split second until I realized what she knew. It was all in her eyes. She knew that I knew, and I knew that she had to know too. Our secrets exposed to one another for the first time, and I wasn't sure what to feel standing in front of her now. Angry? Betrayed? Which was it? I wasn't too sure myself, but I couldn't let her get away with it. She'd been playing me all along. She had lied to me, tricked me, and made me look like a fool. . . Still, I couldn't help but feel slightly overjoyed at finding out the truth. Why? Even I couldn't understand that, and more importantly, I couldn't let it show. . .

At least, not in front of _her_.

"Going somewhere, Rose? Or should I say. . . _Jinx_?" My words had stricken her core, and by revealing the truth I had set off all canons in starting a war in my very own home. It was reckless, immature, and stupid - but I couldn't help it. I was overwhelmed by everything that it had come out on it's own, and my mind had done a complete reverse in returning me to the bad guy on campus. The bully everyone praised. . .

A villain.

"Bastard. . ." That was all she whispered before she morphed back into the villainous feline of Jump city by simply removing the silver ring on her finger. She didn't hesitate to attack, ready to hurt me in anyway possible in order to escape, and that's exactly what she did by whipping around and grabbing the other woman behind her.

"Jinx stop!" I commanded the girl who took my aunt against her will and wrapped her arm around the woman's neck, taking her in a chokehold, "Leave her alone!"

"Step away from the door or the old hag get's it!" She threatened, raising a hand over the woman's head with pink sparks flaring all around.

"This is between you and me, she has nothing to do with-"

" _Right?_ You expect me to believe that!" She scoffed, gripping the woman tighter to keep her locked in her arms, "You should have been more careful when you planned all this."

" _W-Wally_. . ." My Aunt managed to cough out, her voice piercing my chest as she struggled to breathe in the feline's trap.

"Planned this? You were the one who came after me! And for what? To figure out my weakness?" I hissed sharply, pointing at the girl who'd kept spewing out more lies to try and confuse me.

"What are you talking about? You were the one who started all this! Trying to get closer to me just so you could-"

"Quit playing innocent!" I cut her off sternly, "You only transferred here because you knew my secret!"

"I transferred in because I couldn't risk getting exposed by the titans!"

"Wait. . ." I stopped her, waving my hands to put the conversation on pause and think over all that had been said, "Are you saying you didn't come here to expose _me_?"

"Why would I waste my time doing that? News flash, _kid flash_! The world doesn't revolve around you!" She glared, her arm firmly wrapped around the auburn woman's neck.

"Then how did-"

"Why don't we cut the chit chat and skip right to the part where you explain how you figured it all out? How long have you even known about me? Was it when you broke into my home? Or before that? And what exactly were you planning on doing by putting on this whole charade about trying to be my friend and-"

"Hold up!" I raised a hand to her, ready to call defeat in order to gain a better explanation, "I don't think we're on the same page here. I never knew about this until today, and I never planned anything to-"

"Liar!" She shrieked, eyes glowing pink. She pulled the woman in tighter, my aunt gasping and squirming in her arm for air, until her voice softened and her eyes fell shut.

"Ji-Rose! Please!" I begged, watching her carry my aunts unconscious body in her arm, "I wouldn't lie to you about something like that!"

"And why should I believe you?"

"Because I've never once lied to you!" The room was quiet for a brief period of time, and all she did was stand there, staring at me with that same expressionless gaze. Why? Because she knew it was true. She knew I was being sincere. I could tell. Why else would she have put a stop to the madness she'd created.

"How do I know that's not a lie? After all, this whole thing could have just been planned right from the-"

"But it wasn't. . ." I cut her words off mid way, not wanting to listen anymore to the thoughts she'd been keeping in her head. I had betrayed her, I had abandoned her, and I had failed her more than once. That was why she couldn't trust me, why she couldn't have faith in what I said, and that tore at my heart. Knowing that all of this was just the result of all I'd done wrong. But even if she held a large sum of doubt, she wouldn't attack me just yet. She couldn't because despite her troubles in trusting me, she still wanted to. She did. All for that one fact, because despite all I'd done wrong I had never been dishonest, I had never attempted to intentionally hurt her. Never. And that's why she wouldn't attack me.

At least not yet. . .

"Step aside kid flash." She commanded, holding the woman up higher to remain in control, even though she failed in doing so with trembling hands. . .

"No." I stood my ground, refusing to back down and took a step closer to stop her from doing any more harm, "I'm not going anywhere. And neither are you."

"I'm warning you!" She spat, anger filled eyes shooting right through me, "I'll kill her if you don't-"

"You wont." I muttered, and she flinched in response, eyes wide in shock as she tried stepping further away from me.

"Y-You don't know tha-"

"Yes I do." I said, slowly moving in inch by inch, "You wouldn't do something like that."

"How would you know!?" She kept shouting, backing further away the closer I moved in.

"Because I know you!" My screams stopped her from moving, frozen like a statue to listen only to my words, "You're a good person, Jinx. You know that. I know that. And you would never do something that would jeopardize our friendship. . ."

"Well then you must not know me all that well!" She retorted, body shaking, tears surfacing as she refused to obey my commands.

"Rose. . ." She clenched her jaw in hearing her name being called, no doubt trying to fight back those tears desperately trying to creep out. The tears I'd been responsible in creating, which brought back the same thoughts I always had whenever it came to her - it was my fault. It was always my fault. "Please just trust me."

"Why should I?" She asked, taking in a deep shuddering breath that made my chest ache knowing the fear she carried brought along the betrayal of her past; _our_ past.

"Because I would never do anything to hurt you." That was all I could say, all I could think of to get her to understand that I wasn't the threat here. . .

And it worked.

She gave me a steady glance, questioning me in her mind before she made her decision in releasing my guardian and letting her body drop to the ground. Normally I would have been worried about the woman who's body fell hard over wooden floors, but the snores she inhaled gave signs that she'd be alright, and that sent relief over my heart.

After that I quickly took the woman from off the floor and carried her to the bedroom in seconds flat before returning to the pink haired criminal silently standing in the living room. She wanted to leave, she hated being here, that was obvious, but there were still questions that needed answering. Things neither of us were fully aware of and I wasn't going to let her out until it was all explained and understood.

"What now? You stalling time to get your little buddies here to take me to jail?" She asked, giving me a dull look after folding her arms over her chest.

"I haven't told anyone about this, and I'm not going to, okay?" I told her, trying to keep my voice calm as she casually walked over to the couch and plopped down on it before talking.

" _Right_?" She laughed, her sarcasm irritating me even more than usual, "Like I'm going to believe that. Why don't you just go back to answering my questions? How long have you known?" She turned her head to me, eyes glaring like they normally did, with the rest of her body laid over the cushions.

"Let's just say a little bird told m-"

"It was Linda, wasn't it?" She quickly sat up, eyes glowing pink again and I panicked at how fast it was for her to figure it out.

"What? Why would she-"

"Because she's the only 'little bird' in this town that knows." She hissed, hands clenching as she lowered her gaze to curse the other girls name quietly to herself.

"She was just worried about you. . ." I tried to defend the girl in her absence, but was silenced by glowing pink eyes staring me down, "W-Why don't you just focus on explaining yourself instead! Like for starters, never mentioning the fact that you were only interested in joining the Brotherhood of Evil because of your _mother_!"

"Is that what she told you? You're both idiots." She muttered, kicking herself off the couch to move back to the direction of the door, "I'm leaving." She said, and I had no choice but to zip over and block her from escaping again.

"No you're not."

"Why can't you just leave me alone? It wasn't enough that you had to nearly wreck everything else back home, but now you're trying to ruin my chances here too!?"

"I'm not trying to ruin anything for you, jinx! I just want help you and understand. . ." The sound of her laughter forced me to stop what I was saying, and I knew it was because she had finally caught on to it. She saw me for who I was, the fraud, the hypocrite, the real bad guy. . .

"That's pretty funny coming from the worst guy on campus. Who would have thought Star City's biggest hero was also one of their worst civilians. _What a joke_." She scoffed again, and turned her head to the side to avoid my eyes.

"You're right. . ." I started, laughing at the irony of it all, "I'm a fraud, I know that. I told you that a long time ago, but I've always been honest. At least with you. . . " The room fell silent again and I could feel her eyes on me as my own dropped to the floor. So there it was. She'd seen it too, and she despised me for it.

Who wouldn't?

"Honesty, huh? Last I checked, honest people don't lie about their names _Rudolph_." She folded her arms over chest, trying to fence me out and pick at whatever she could to convince herself that I couldn't be trusted. That I was a threat to her very livelihood, and I could have been. . . I could have, but that would have resulted in losing everything that we had. Everything that we were, even if that was still unclear, and that's how it would remain if I betrayed her again. If I gave her another reason to distrust me, because that would result in losing one another completely. Thereby drawing the line that cut both of our worlds in half, and in the process losing _her_ for good. . .

I couldn't risk that.

Not again.

"Rudolph's my middle name, okay? I never lied about that." I sighed, watching her shoulders drop as the intensity of the conversation began to subside, "It was my dad's name, and for some reason I thought that if I kept it for myself then it'd be like he was still here. Like he never left. . ." We watched each other carefully, our guards now kept up being the only two in the room. She stared, trying to search for any reason to toss me away, and I did the same with the intentions of gaining even the slightest bit of trust to keep her _here_ , with me. . .

"Well. . ." She cleared her throat, letting her arms drop to her side, "This conversation's getting us no-" A heavy buzz cut her off and brought our attention to the couch again. She seemed to have recognized the strange noise in just one ring and immediately dropped to the floor in search of whatever it was. "There it is!" She said cheerfully, and pulled out the small bag she'd been carrying around the night before.

"My aunt must have forgotten to bring it upstairs. . ."

" _Sure_. She just _forgot_." She spoke in disbelief, pulling out a small device from out of her purse.

"I thought you said you didn't even have a phone?"

" _This_ -" She stopped and waved the device in my face, "Isn't a phone, it's a communicator connected to my teammates. One that'll give out my location if you don't shut up and let me answer." I didn't say anything or made any effort in arguing with her. At this point there was no use in even trying, because knowing her I knew I'd only make matters worse if conversing led to another bickering session.

"Speak." She whispered into the device, holding it close to her face.

"Jinx! Where the hell are you!?" A loud distorted voice shouted from the other end, making us both jump in response to their unexpected tone.

"Relax, moron. I missed my stop, so I spent the night at a motel." She groaned, rolling her eyes before resting back on the couch to finish her conversation.

" _A motel_?" The stranger repeated in doubt, and their was a long pause before he spoke again and asked, ". . . is that the story you're sticking with?"

"It's the only story." She said dully, masking her fear perfectly to the other on the line.

"When are you getting home?" He quickly asked.

"A few hours. I'll call when I get off the bus, okay?"

"Fine." He finished, and with that hung up on the girl who sighed in relief before shoving the device back into her bag.

"Who was that?" I felt the need to ask, even though the answer was quite clear. This wasn't the first time I'd heard his voice after all.

"None of your business." She shook her head, eyes glancing up at me before getting back up on her feet.

"It's that one eyed freak, right?" The moment those words escaped my lips I knew I had gone in too deep. Here I was trying to gain her trust again, and still I had allowed jealousy to overpower me. It was selfish of me, maybe even worse than that, but there was so much I needed to know. So much I wanted to understand, and her short answers weren't giving me anything but fueling the anger she enjoyed watching grow even stronger. . .

But not this time.

"Don't you dare call him that!" She shouted, standing close to me with glowing eyes ready to strike in offense. This was probably the best time to back out now, to apologize and settle the whole thing smoothly without triggering any more negativity. But still, I couldn't stop. I hated the way she defended him, I hated all the lies she had spouted till now, and I hated being shut in the dark. All this time I'd been driving myself insane trying to get her out of my head, thinking she was all I wanted, yet I knew nothing about her. I didn't know who she was, what more she'd been hiding, even with all the time I'd spent near her, around her, with her. . .

I still knew _nothing_ about her.

"You two must be pretty close. You must spend a lot of time with him. In the morning's, afternoons, at night. . . in the bedroom?" I mocked, grinning at her irritation towards me. No, this might not have been what I wanted, but it didn't seem like I could do any more. I had felt all sorts of emotions with the days spent beside her, but all I ever seemed to conjure up within her was anger. But If that was it, then was that all I was good for. . . ?

"I'm done here." She whispered, yanking her eyes away from mine to head for the exit.

"You that eager to get back to your little boyfriend?" She stopped for a moment, shaking her head before glancing back at me one final time.

"Well, that doesn't concern you now, does it?" She smirked, and reached for the knob to be set free. I wanted her to leave, I wanted her gone, I wanted her out of this house. That's what I told myself, what I kept repeating in my head. But even so, my body refused to listened to those thoughts and went against them by racing over to stop her.

"But it does!" I gripped onto her arm, refusing to let go, and slamming the door she had managed to open by a few inches.

"How?" She asked, pulling her arm from out of my hand.

"Because. . ." She fixed her eyes on mine, waiting for an answer that I myself couldn't muster up the courage to say. The facts were that she was right, as usual, I had no right to pry into her personal affairs. I had no right to judge her either on what she did or had done up to this point, because she'd clearly been living far differently than I could ever imagine. I had no right to butt in, I knew that, but that didn't stop me. I wanted to know, because I needed to know, because I couldn't be kept out. I couldn't let her shut me out anymore when I. . . when I felt like. . .

" _Because_?" She repeated, eye brows raised in waiting for me to speak.

"Because. . ."

"Because what!?"

"Because I care about you!" My screams had shocked her, catching her off guard as she stumbled backwards with eyes opened wide.

I was being honest, that much was true. I did care about her, just like I cared about every civilian in this town, or the people in this neighborhood, or the titans back in jump city, and the family I'd been living with in this home, that was true. I did care. I did, but it wasn't just that. True, I wanted to protect her, and yes I did care about her just as much as everyone else that needed me, but it was different. _She_ was different. . .

Because she made _me_ different.

"W-What?" She stuttered, pressing her back against the door to keep me at a further distance from her.

"Or more like. . ." I hesitated, taking in a deep breath before stepping forward to admit the one thing I'd been trying to deny, not just to her, but to myself. . .

"I like you. _A lot_."

There was a long and heavy silence that formed after my confession. No one moved, not a breath was taken, we just stood there in utter silence. Our eyes staring into one another's, making me unsure of what to say, do, or feel - and that made me far more nervous. But, then, it was over. Her quiet reaction had been broken by a burst of laughter she allowed to escape, and I wasn't sure on how to react to it, because I wasn't sure what I had done to cause that sort of reaction. . .

"You're delusional west." She tried to breathe, shaking her head in disbelief, and telling me what it was that I had missed. She didn't believe me. why would she? The guy she knew had put on so many faces, so many masks, which was why she wouldn't take me seriously. Not just yet. . .

"I'm serious!" I said hurriedly, reaching for her hand again to recapture her attention.

"Alright, just stop-"

"It's always been you, Rose!" My words emitted a serious atmosphere between us as her eyes fell back on mine, hard and firm. "Always."

"You don't know what you're saying." She said, trying to pull away from the hand that refused to let her go again.

"Yes I do!" I said loudly, making her flinch at my unexpected outburst that brought her to back away and lower her head, "I'm sorry. . ." I whispered, releasing her arm and taking in deep breaths before continuing, "But Rose, you just don't get it. I was a wreck when my parent's passed away. I was stuck wallowing in my own guilt and shame, blaming myself for something I know I had no control over and then. . . and then I met _you_."

" _Me_?" She questioned, slowly raising her head to look up at me.

"That night in the attic, I saw you sitting there when everyone else was trying to sleep, and I just. . . I _knew_." I paused, moving in slowly to explain what it was that drew me to her that night, what it was that kept drawing me back, and why I couldn't keep away.

"Knew what?" She asked, eyes shifting from me to the floor.

"I was a bratty kid, I'll admit that." I shrugged, owning up to all my faults right then and there, "I thought that it was just me. That no one could ever understand what it felt like to lose something so precious. . . but you _knew_. I could tell, just by the way you looked at everything, at _everyone_. I knew you'd get it. That you'd get _me_. You understood what it felt like - but I was still wrong. I was wrong because _your_ pain. . . was beyond comparison to anyone I'd ever met, or even my own. . ."

"What?" She shoved me away, anger sparking in her eyes again, "You're pitying me now?"

"No!" I quickly said, waving my hands in front of her, "That isn't it."

"Then what is-"

"I saw you that night-" I tried to finish, cutting her off in hopes that she'd listen to all I needed to say, everything that I'd kept locked away for years, "When all the other kids were in their beds, crying themselves to sleep, praying to go home, whispering little wishes, you didn't do anything. You didn't even want to _try_ , because you didn't seem to care at all. You just sat there in your bed with the same expression on your face, and that's when I decided to say something. . ."

"This is pointless." She rolled her eyes at me, placing her hand over the knob to reopen the exit.

"Just listen!" I yelled, pressing my hand against the door to keep it shut, only to receive the same irritated gaze she kept focused on me, "I'd watched you for hours. Just sitting there, staring, and I couldn't once figure out what you were thinking. Even now, I still have no clue, and I wanted to know _so_ badly because I wanted to understand you. I wanted to understand what it was that ruined you. . . and now I do. . ."

I stared her down, watching her eyes soften as her hand slid off the handle. She didn't say anything, she didn't move, and she carried the same expression as usual, but her silence was enough for me to understand. She would listen. She would hear me out because she wanted to know too. She wanted to understand my reason, and I knew that for a fact. Why else would she have stayed? She could have attacked me at any moment, she could have sent me flying minutes ago, but she didn't. She didn't because she wanted to stay, she wanted to be here, with me, and even if she refused to admit that, her eyes told me it was true. . .

And that was all I needed to keep going.

"That's why I spoke to you that night. I knew there had to have been something going on, something you weren't telling anyone, and I wanted to help you. I wanted to understand you on some level, and I just - I wanted to see you smile, because. . . because I thought if you could do it, then maybe I could too. . ."

"West. . ." She whispered softly, sighing and struggling to find the right words to say. . .

But I wasn't done yet.

"I just wanted to protect you, Rose. I wanted to help you, but they wouldn't let me! They wouldn't listen - none of them would!"

"Okay, I get it - "

"No, you don't!" I snapped, carefully grabbing her by her shoulders, "I know that you hate me for everything that I've done, but all I've been trying to do since then was make up for failing you that night. I thought I could make up for it if I went along with what everyone else wanted. That I could somehow fix things that way, and find closure, but I still hurt you regardless in trying to make the rest of the world happy."

"Well I never asked you to do that for me!" She suddenly shouted, shaking my hands off of her.

"I know!" I hissed, my anger directed more towards my own guilt rather than the girl staring up at me scornfully, "I know, but. . . Rose I just didn't want to screw it up again. I still don't, because I don't want to lose you-"

"Alright, that's enough!" She commanded and made another attempt at reaching for the doors handle.

"No!" I ordered, grabbing both of her hands to keep her in place, "Stop trying to run away from this!"

"From what?" She spat.

"Us!"

"There is no ' _us_ ' West! There never was. . ." She spoke in shaky breaths, wrenching from out of my hold, "I already have someone I love."

 _Lies_.

Another big lie she wasn't just trying to shove down my throat, but hers as well. She wanted to believe it, she wanted to sound convincing enough that she herself would buy it. But it was all lies. She knew it and I knew it, because those weren't her true feelings. They couldn't be. Still. . .

It didn't make it any easier to hear.

"You don't love him Rose!"

"You don't know that-"

"If you did then last night never would have happened." Her eyes flickered back to mine, knowing very well what it was that I was referring too. "That kiss . . . it wasn't just me who felt something."

"That kiss was a mistake."

"Mistake or not it was real! And I know there was more to it than just-"

"It doesn't matter! As far as I know that kiss never happened in my mind, and neither did any of this." Her words hit me hard, as she turned her head away to end the conversation.

"Why?" I tried to ask, gathering up all the strength within me to keep my voice calm and steady, "Why do you keep trying to push me away?"

"Because you're scum! All of you are . . ." She stood trembling in front of me, eyes cold and distant as the truth had finally surfaced.

This had nothing to do with me, not in particular. This was something she'd been battling alone and on her own. The trauma she refused to admit to, and thus excluded everyone else from her world in order to remain as she was. Broken, yet manageable. This was how she'd been living, how she'd survived, by building up a wall to keep the rest of the world out, including me. . .

But not anymore.

"Don't do that. . ." I glared at her, watching her grow smaller in shock, "Don't you _dare_ group me with them when you know that I would _**never** _ do anything like that to hurt you - **_ever_**!"

"I'm sure they thought the same way once too. . ." She whispered slowly, her eyes staring down at the floor. Almost as if she was distancing herself from everything here, even me.

"Rose, look at me." I reached out for her, cupping her cheek in my hand to return her sight back to me.

She faced me, and I stood closely in front of her, yet it was as if she couldn't see me. She just stood there, breathing slowly, and I wasn't sure how to bring her back from wherever it was she had wandered off to in her head. So, I moved in closer, hoping my voice would some how reach her, but the moment my fingers brushed against her arm a sudden switch went off - and she was back. Eyes flaring, breathing steady, but still angry. . .

"D-Don't touch me!" She squinted, shoving me away.

"Jinx, just listen to me!" I ordered, holding onto both arms to stop her from fighting against me, "I'm not them, okay? I would _never_ do anything like that to you. I couldn't live with myself if I did. . ."

"Liar!" She shook her head frantically, trying to pull out of my grip. She wasn't listening, not because she didn't believe me, but because she didn't want to. Not when everything inside of her was screaming at her not to, "Let me go!" She pushed against me, struggling to break free.

"Rose, please -"

"No!" She cried out, her body falling to the floor as I fought to keep her standing. She kept her back pressed against the door, dropping to the ground and taking me down with her in my refusal of letting her go. I couldn't, not in this state. The heavy panting, the wandering eyes - she was panicking. She was scared. No, it was worse than that. She was lost. . .

Because she wasn't _here_.

"I said let me go!" She whimpered, kicking at me to release her completely. Still, I refused. I had to. If I couldn't help her now, then I'd have failed her completely.

"Rose, look at me. . ."

"Stop!" She screamed, tears forming in her eyes as she shook her head petulantly and continued in pulling away, "Just stop!" Her voice shrieked.

"Rose it's just me. . ." I whispered, releasing her wrists and placing both hands on the side of her face to have her focus on me again, "It's just me. . ." I breathed, and I could feel her shaking as she studied me carefully, "I'm not going to hurt you -"

"Liar. . ." She choked out, tears falling as she pushed my hands off of her face.

"You can trust me-"

"Liar!" She screamed out again, kicking me away and pushing me as far as she could. But I couldn't keep away. I took hold of her wrists again, ignoring the stinging pain in my chest at seeing tears slide down her cheeks.

There was so much uncertainty, so much doubt and distrust between us. Here she couldn't be sure what to believe. Everything that I'd said, everything that I swore, how could she be sure enough to believe in any of it? She couldn't. And that was the problem.

Fact's were, she couldn't trust me. That had to be earned. She couldn't believe me, or rely on me, because she didn't feel she needed to. She didn't want to. Not after all she'd been through on her own, and even now, I'll never understand how that felt. No matter how hard I'd try, I'd never be able to fully understand her. So, those were the facts. Those were thing's that were true, and would remain that way until she could learn to lean on me on her own. I couldn't force her to do that, because she wasn't sure about any of it just yet. . .

But there was one thing she could be sure about.

Something we both felt, despite our differences, our positions, and the worlds we lived in. This was something we could both put our faith into, and it was this. . . _Us_.

I held her wrists gently in both hands, staring into tear filled eyes before bringing her in carefully. I forced my lips over hers, knowing very well how much she disapproved in doing thing's that weren't of her own will. But I needed to show her, I needed her to know, that even if she couldn't fully trust me, she could trust in this. In us, our feelings, what we felt whenever we were together, whenever our lips met. Just this. That was all I needed, all she needed, and it would be enough. It had to be.

She fought against me at first, pushing her hands on my chest to pull away, but in only seconds she gave in. It was short, but it was enough to understand it's meaning. If I couldn't say it, than I'd show it to her. And that's what I did. Through that one kiss, our feelings were finally set on the table and I knew. . . this was it.

 _She_ was it.

After slowly pulling away she returned to her calm nature. The two of us sitting on the floor, staring steadily into each other's eyes. She was relaxed, she was back, and our feelings were clear. Even if she tried to deny it, it was obvious. It always was.

"Let me go west. . ." She whispered calmly, and I obeyed her rational commands.

"Jinx. . ." I exhaled deeply, trying to meet the eyes that fell to the ground, "Talk to me."

"I. . ." She gazed up at me wearily, trying to speak, "I just. . . it's better if we just never speak of this again."

"About what? The kiss? Or what those people did to-"

"Wally please!" She begged, pulling her knees close to her chest, "Just drop it."

"You have to talk to me Rose. If not me then _someone_ , you can't just pretend like nothing ever happened -"

"Don't you get it!" She cried, lips quivering as tears began to slowly return, "I can't talk about it. If I do then I'll have to accept it and. . . I can't do that! I won't!"

"Jinx you can't just-"

"Yes I can!" She quickly nodded, fighting back tears that were clearly there.

"No you can't! Living in denial wont fix anything!"

"And this will?" She laughed, ignoring the tears that had finally reached their peak, "Don't you see? If I admit it then I won't be able to do anything anymore! I won't be me anymore!"

"Rose. . ." I tried scooting in closer, not wanting to trigger another episode by going in too far, "This doesn't change anything. It doesn't change who you are!"

"It changes everything!" She sobbed, eyes glowing pink before burying her face in her knees, "It means that I'll always be stuck this way. I'll always be like this, dirty and filthy and -" My ears stopped listening to the thought's she had swarming in her head, my heart sinking deeper and deeper with every pained word she allowed to escape her lips. I couldn't pay attention to that anymore, I couldn't sit there and listen to what she had to say because it was wrong. She was _wrong_. And that wasn't her. She was never wrong, not ever. She was annoyingly and consistently accurate about everything she said, but not this time. Because this wasn't her. No, this was the child they had broken. The girl they had destroyed now resurfacing and trying to take over. This was her demon. And I wasn't going to listen to it's lies anymore.

I took her by her arms and yanked her forward, holding her tightly in my embrace. I wanted her to stop, I needed her to. I couldn't let her destroy herself even more, not with the lies she'd conjured up in her head. She wasn't any of the things she thought, because she was far greater than that. Perfection at it's finest, and yet she couldn't see it. She couldn't see the greatness that was clear in my eyes, and in anyone's eyes if they dared looked closely. She was greatness, that was just it. And that was why I couldn't listen to her anymore, not when she was deliberately trying to destroy herself, because in that process. . .

It would destroy me too.

"Just stop. . ." I pleaded as tears stung my eyes, "Why can't you see that this doesn't define you. It never has - so stop blaming yourself for it!"

"Then who am I suppose to blame!? God? Mother? Or. . . _Miss Amber_?" She spoke the name of the last woman in spite before burying her face in my chest. My mind swerved as it tried pushing each piece together. There was more, more than I knew, and she was trying to tell me without giving it all away. But why? Why couldn't she just say it? Why couldn't she tell me what had really happened?

 _Why?_

"What did you just say?" I nudged the girl who rested her head on my chest quietly.

"Am I just suppose to blame everyone instead?" She asked monotonously, dodging my question intentionally to avoid answering what I needed to hear.

"Rose, look at me." I pulled her away carefully, staring into dull, cold eyes looking back at me, "What about Miss Amber? What did she do?" I urged her to answer, but she seemed hesitant, trying to laugh it off as if it were nothing, but she gave up and let the tears fall after lowering her head, as if out of shame for a crime she clearly didn't commit. . .

"I-I told her I didn't want to. . ." She shrugged, trying to smile with the same pained expression on her face, "I told her but. . . I should have fought harder. . ." There wasn't much to go on with just that, and I knew I had to be careful when asking about this specific topic, but I couldn't keep wasting time running around in circles. I needed to speed things up, I needed to be faster but. . .

"Rose what did she-"

 ** _"W-Wally!"_**

The sudden cry of my Aunt came echoing from the upstairs bedroom, and it'd be only a matter of time before she figured everything out and come hurrying downstairs. There wasn't enough time for anything anymore, there wasn't, but. . . I couldn't just leave things at that.

"I should go." She sniffled, wiping the tears off her face before getting back up.

"Wait!" I reached for her hand, trying to bring myself back up and think of someway to finish this, "You can't just-"

"They'll come searching for me if I don't leave now." The girl explained, referring to her comrades who'd be waiting for her to arrive home shortly, "I won't tell anyone about you, or your secret, if that's what you're worried about. I expect you'll do the same in return." She finished, slipping on the silver ring she had removed to morph back into the school's former geek to leave without any problems.

I couldn't stop her from leaving, not when I had my own family to worry about, but fear struck me the second she walked out that door. There wasn't anything holding her here anymore. I knew her secret, so clearly I'd be a threat to her, as she was to me. Meaning, that her return wasn't certain. Her trust in me was never clear, and that meant she might not ever come back. Still, I couldn't go chasing after her. I didn't have that right. Yet I wanted nothing more but for her to stay. Here, in this town, on campus, with me, by my side. It didn't matter who she was, what she'd done, or where she'd been, as long as she'd come back here. That was all I wanted, all I craved, yet I couldn't find the strength to go after her. All I could do was hope, wish, and pray that my feelings would reach her somehow. That they'd bring her back, because that was all I wanted. Just her, nothing else. I just need her here. That was it. Rose, jinx, Adam's, it didn't mattered, because as long as she was here. . .

 **Nothing else mattered.**


	36. Chapter 35: Chance Encounter

Chapter 35: Chance Encounter

Jinx

The sun radiated it's heat over those in the city, stepping out of buses and taxi's, all of us soaking in it's heat. Almost as if winter had never even existed. I myself could feel it's warmth, the signs of it's heat projected through light. It was real. This was real. Which meant everything that happened hours before, days ago, and in past years. . .

They were all real.

My mind had lost sense of everything after I'd reached my stop, and I couldn't find the energy to head home just yet. And so, I sat there. On a bench. Waiting, thinking, reorganizing my thoughts, just to figure out what I'd missed. What it was that prevented me from seeing it, from seeing the truth? Months had passed battling against the hero I'd been _studying_ with, and not once did it ever occur to me that they could ever be the same person. Why? Why couldn't I see that? Why had it been so difficult to piece together when it was this obvious?

 **Why?**

 _"It's always been you Rose. Always. . ."_

 _"You can trust me."_

Trust. What did that even mean, exactly? How could I put my faith in someone I was meant to destroy? It didn't make any sense, and that made it impossible for me to believe any of it could work. We. . .

We could _never_ work.

 _"inx. . . Ji. . ."_ The static voice of my name came buzzing from the communicator in my bag. This was my reality call, what I needed to focus on. Whatever came next would need to be figured out later on. Whether I'd return to that school or not was still undecided, because I myself was still uncertain that Wally West could in fact be anything more but a risk that would put all my freedom in jeopardy again. . .

"I'm here," I spoke through, bringing the device close to my face, "I'll be home in a couple minutes."

"Jinx, it's already noon." He said dully, snapping me out of my thoughts after realizing how much time I'd wasted sitting around lost in my own mind.

"Sorry. I must have lost track of time when I was-"

"Alright, cut the crap Jinx." He hissed, "We know you didn't spend the night at some stupid hotel."

"You're right, because it was a _motel_." I told him, trying to keep my voice steady and calm in fear of risking whatever it was he was trying to aim at.

 _"Really?"_ There was a heavy suspicion in his tone, as if he knew something that I myself couldn't see. But he knew something, something about last night, something that brought along this strange behavior. . .

But what?

"What exactly are you implying. . .?" My words fell below a whisper when my eyes lingered on the shiny silver ring on my finger. It had all made sense now.

 _"It's not like I acted alone - most of it was Seymour. . ."_

Gizmo had given it away sooner than I'd realized. This ring, this device, it was never meant to help me. It wasn't created to make my life easier. Why would it when they were against the idea from the start? No, this was something to benefit them and that was it. A chain, a leash, another lock to keep me imprisoned. . .

Just like a pet.

"You've been tracking me, haven't you?" I asked warily, but the long pause on the other end made my accusation true enough.

"You didn't give us a choice-"

"Didn't give you a choice?" I snapped, getting off the bench to yell directly at the boy on the other end, "What did I ever do to suddenly become untrustworthy enough to-"

"This has nothing to do with trust." He muttered.

"Then what is it? What could have possibly happened that would drive the two of you-"

"Jinx we saw the video." His words caught me off guard, and confusion struck me along with the slight hint of fear. There seemed to be a lot of video's being taken of me without my knowledge, but at this point I was certain that whenever it was mentioned something bad always followed. . .

"W-What video?" I failed in trying to keep my cool. My courage betraying me.

"Gizmo hacked into the school's security systems. Jinx, we saw what those kids did to you. . ." His tone had softened, but it was as if he were speaking out of disappointment and shame.

Ashamed of _me_.

"Why did he hack into the schools systems in the first place?" I demanded to know. Trying to hide the humiliation of my status on campus by trying to put the blame on someone else, anyone, it didn't matter who. I just wanted someone to be mad at, something to distract me. . .

Anything.

"Because he was _worried_? We all were! I mean you've changed a lot since going out there!" Seymour screamed, reading right through what it was I was trying to do. A cycle I myself couldn't break alone. "You're always on edge whenever you come back from there. We just wanted to make sure you'd be safe-"

"No. . ." I laughed, shaking my head at his own attempt in blaming me for something they'd always been trying to do, "This wasn't you trying to look out for me anymore, this was about control. This was about owning me like a piece of property again by making a leash and tying me up so that I couldn't run away. That's why you did it without telling me anything. . ."

"Jinx that's not what - "

"Don't lie to me!" I retaliated, hands shaking the entire time, "If you were really worried about me you would have brought it up any chance you got just like you _always_ do. But trust is a two way street, and it's clear neither of us are on the same page here. Maybe we never were. . ."

"Jinx please - " His frantic pleading was shut off in my removal of the battery installed in the device. The sun was setting, the skies were darkening, but there was nothing I could do. Nowhere I could go but to sit there, on a bench with tears and a heavy heart. I had nothing, I had no one, and the only person I could really blame for all of it. . . was me.

It felt as if I'd been driving a wedge between myself and my own family for months. We were drifting, I could feel it but I couldn't understand why? We used to think with the same mind, in the same way, back when we had nothing. No - back when we _were_ nothing. And we still were - _nothing_. And that might have been my own fault.

Perhaps it'd been my own selfish desires in rejoining society that started it all. Maybe it was my lust for the power my own mother possessed that had me pushing them to rise even higher, and in the process only driving them further away? Or maybe it was just me? My questioning in myself, in what it was that I really wanted, what I needed, and all because of the stupid heroic Jock that'd been toying with my head for months. Whatever it was, it all led back to me. I had ruined us, and now I was only inches away from losing them for good. . .

"Maybe I really am bad luck. . ." I chuckled through blurred tears, unable to fully set my eyes on the silver ring I had made such a fuss over. A ring. A stupid ring, and because of it I couldn't even face my own teammates. How pathetic was that?

I took a huge breath, wiped my tears, and clapped my hands on my cheeks. There was no use in crying, what's done is done. I had messed up and it was up to me to fix it, to prove to them where my true loyalty stood. After all, this only began because they'd been uncertain on which side I'd stand on, who I'd choose to fight for, and that answer should have never been questioned to begin with. Better yet, I never should have given them a reason to doubt me in anyway. But I did. I did, and I needed to fix that.

I pushed the communicator into my bag and brought myself back on my feet. There'd be no more tears, no more setbacks, I just needed to prove my worth to them, my family, and those that we'd lost. The children that depended on us to avenge their deaths. And so, I dusted myself off and headed for the street light. Ready to cross the road with all doubt erased from my head when. . .

I saw her.

The swaying color of golden hair dancing in the wind caught my attention instantly. It could have been a mistake, my imagination playing tricks on me again, but something drove me to look even closer. To focus in on the young girl standing with a small group of people, laughing and smiling, like any other civilian her age. But the moment my eyes were caught by deep blue ones I knew I was right. I had to be right. Even if it seemed impossible at the time, because no matter what she did, whatever disguise she'd wear, I'd always be drawn back. We were connected that way, forever and always, because. . . we were sisters.

 _ **"Terra!"**_

* * *

 _ **Quick Note:**_

 _Thanks to anyone who's made it this far in the story. I wanted to share this in my last post but I wanted to actually bring Terra into the story before saying anything else._

 _BUT anyway, I'm going to be writing a **second fanfic** , probably while I'm writing this one, centered on **Terra's life** and her **OWN story** that'll give her a better background in this one too. So I hope you guy's will read that if you get the chance, if not I TOTALLY understand. I never planned on writing a story about her, never even planned on her being in this story but it just kinda happened anyway. So, thought I'd share that. _

_I also won't be posting ONLY on weekends. Winter breaks coming, less work and stuff, I'm all good RN so I have time to write more after this week. I'll delete this note later, **MAYBE** , but just thought I'd share it with anyone who actually made time to read my fanfic and stuff. _

_Thanks again._

 _PS I know this chapters short but. . . that's life._

 _-Clover_


	37. Chapter 36: The Devil's Puppet

Chapter 36: The Devil's Puppet

Kid Flash

The moon's pale light unveiled the old wooden house on the corner street. The home of a forgotten life, short-lived, with only the memory of one girl kept in my mind. A memory that, at the time, seemed all too precious to me, could in fact have been the opposite in her mind. Whether I'd see her in the morning, on campus, or in the halls, the truth was something I needed to find out on my own - because she would never own up to it. She would never trust me enough to be honest. Which was why I had to come back. I had to figure out what it was they were hiding. Something in that house that I couldn't remember, or ever paid attention to. But I knew there was something. . .

Something dark.

The rustling of leaves brought me to keep my guard up, and I quickly whipped around to search for whomever stood behind. But my heart fell peacefully when I realized it was none other than the masked leader of Jump city finally arriving to answer my call.

"Took you long enough." I smiled, greeting the teen as he approached me from behind a tree.

"Sorry, but not all of us have the power to race across an entire city in less than five seconds." He retorted, brushing off the dirt and leaves from his knees.

"Not like I was expecting you to. . ." My response fell short when I caught the image of a second figure following the other teen behind, "What's she doing here?" I asked, confused as to why the cloaked female would suddenly appear at this very moment.

"You said to bring back up."

"Yeah, you!" I groaned, shaking my head at the cluelessness of the other boy, " _You're_ my back up."

"Oh, well then raven's _my_ back up." He said casually.

"There wasn't suppose to be anyone else-"

" _Enough_. Does it really matter who plays what role in this." Said the hooded girl in the background, "Why are we here at all?"

That was a question I'd been expecting to hear. It was only natural for them to wonder why I'd bring them this far out at night. It was common sense, but even now, I still had no clue myself. I was going on instinct and that was enough for me, because most of my questions kept bringing me back here. Even so, I couldn't share any of that with them, at least not yet. Not until I had the answers. Not until I could understand the situation better, understand _her_ better. . .

"I'm not sure yet."

"What do you mean you're not sure?" Robin asked, annoyed by my answer no doubt, "Why would you-"

"It's just a hunch." I shrugged, not knowing what else I could say to get them to understand, "It might not be anything important, but I have to see if for myself first. . ."

"What are you talking about?" Raven asked.

"You guys don't have to follow if you don't want to."

"That wasn't what we-"

"Then trust me." I whispered, glancing back at the two for a quick second before turning to face the house that had been waiting years for my return.

It was still the same, as if nothing had really changed in the years I'd been away. The place still looked like it'd collapse at any moment, rusting away as usual. How a home like this could ever be granted permission to manage and care for unwanted children was beyond my understanding. But the owner had her ways of doing things, secrets she'd been keeping, and it was my job to figure them out tonight. . .

No matter the cost.

 **~ . . . ~**

I knocked lightly on the door a couple of times, not wanting to wake the entire house up, but hoping someone would hear and answer. I didn't want to cause a scene, or bring unwanted attention, by breaking in without notice. Which meant I had to do things the right way. I had to confront her myself, or whomever owned the house today. Fortunately, the moment the door creaked open it was clear the first part of my plan would appear successful, because there she stood. The woman with fiery red locks who seemed to terrify the villinaous feline living her life in two different cities. That very fact made me far more curious as fear crept into the back of my head. There was no doubt jinx could handle herself, with anyone or anything, so what was it that kept her away from this woman?

What were they hiding?

"What do you want?" The woman yawned, glaring at me from where she stood in her unwelcoming attempt to keep me out.

"Hello, Miss. My name's Barry Allen, I work with the CCPD in the Forensic science department." I lied, obviously, but I kept a calm composure in playing the role of my uncle in order to seek entrance and search for the information I needed. . .

"CCPD? What do you guys want this time?" She groaned. _This time_ she said, that could have meant a lot of things, but it most definitely brought along a strong sense of suspicion. . .

"Nothing too serious. I'm actually here on a personal case, but I'd much rather discuss this with you alone. . ." I tried furthering my explanation, not wanting to give myself away too easily, "May I come inside?"

"Where's your badge?" She hesitated, clearly trying to see right through my lies.

"I'm a scientist miss, not a cop," I tried to explain and reached in my pocket to pull out my phone, "But if you don't believe me I could call in one of the officers to help clear my name if you don't mind getting more people invol-"

"No!" She yelled frantically, placing her hands over my phone to keep me from turning it on, "No it's fine. You can come in." She smiled, pulling the door open to make room for me to enter.

The house looked just like it did on the outside, old and unstable. A rusty staircase that looked as if it'd fall apart if one stood on it for too long, creaking floors that gave warning they'd snap in no time, and broken furniture decorated with dusty cobwebs. . .

Nothing had changed.

"What did you need from me?" She jumped right to the point, already suspecting something was off about my arriving here this late. Not that I was complaining. After all, the faster we moved the quicker the answers would be found.

"I was looking for a file I believe might be in your possession." I said, turning away from stained walls and back to the woman to continue our conversation, "A child I believe might have lived in this house for some time."

"A file?" She furrowed her brows and crossed her arms over her chest, wanting more information that I needed to keep conjuring up in my head.

"Yes. . ." I laughed, swallowing my nerves to clear my mind, "We're in need of it in order to complete a case on a body recently discovered."

"A body? Well, who do you think the child could be?" She asked, stepping forward with eyes locked on mine.

"Rose Adam's I believe was her name. . ." The name seemed to have triggered something the moment it was said out loud, but she only gave it away for a split second. It wasn't much, but it was something to go on. Something to link the two together, and proved that there truly was more to this than I'd ever expected in the past.

"I'm sorry, but there has never been a child of that name living here." She rushed, returning to the door again.

"Are you sure? You haven't even checked-"

"I don't need to check, because I already know." She immediately shot me down, placing a hand on the knob to kick me out at any moment. But that wouldn't stop me now. It couldn't. Not when things were finally falling together.

"I see. . ." I nodded, an idea suddenly striking my head to determine whether or not she spoke the truth, "Well does the name Wallace Rudolph West sound familiar to you?"

"No it does not." She said tonelessly, trying to end the conversation before it could lead anywhere else, "I'm afraid you have the wrong household." She said, clearly fearing my investigating in something she was trying to hide, not just from me personally, but the law as well. . .

"I'm not sure about that but-"

"Perhaps you should leave for the night," She smiled, faking her way through everything and pulling the door open to shut me out again, "It might be best if you go over your information again in the morning."

"I don't think it's-"

"Hey Amber!" An unknown voice called from down the hall, catching both our attention as we followed and viewed a man stepping from out of a room in the far end, "I'm heading out for the night. You can take the kid back up. . ." He stopped in his tracks, eyes shifting from me to her as he stood there, confused by the situation going on in front of him, "Who's he?"

"This is Mister Allen. He works with the _CCPD_." She said in an usual tone, nodding over at the door as if ordering him to leave.

"The CCPD?" He repeated, face falling pale as he tried to force out an unnatural laugh.

"I thought all the children would be in bed at this hour?" I asked, looking to the supposed guardian running the entire house.

"T-They are." She nodded, letting out a laugh similar to his, and clearly forced, to lower any suspicion that had begun to rise.

"Then what child was he referring to?" I asked, gazing down at the woman who grew silent in her refusal in answering anymore questions, leaving me to interrogate the other in her place "Sir, what exactly were you doing in that room?"

"Well. . ." His short response, and his failed attempt in thinking of an excuse, brought along silence that gave a chance in listening to the faint whimpers and cries coming from the other room. There was someone in there, someone they were trying to hide, for whatever reason, and it proved them to be working together in whatever crime they'd been committing.

"Step aside, sir." I commanded, moving past the woman to head into the other room. The cry for help was barely audible, but it was there. There was someone in there, someone who needed saving, someone who needed a hero. But before I could even take another step forward I was stopped by the unknown man blocking the hallway, gripping me by my shoulder.

"Don't you officers need a permit before you can go searching in other peoples homes?" He said scornfully, his eyes threatening me in hopes of scaring me away. Unfortunately for him, I wouldn't back down. Not when it involved the corruption of innocent lives, not when it involved discovering the truth, and not when it stood in the way of better understanding the one person I couldn't save. . .

Not again.

"You're right. . ." I laughed, nodding at his twisted views of the law. "You're absoloutely right. . ." I muttered, glaring at the stranger looking down on me before reaching for the hand he had placed on my shoulder.

"Guess it's a good thing I'm not a cop."

There aren't any excuses to justify my actions. I could say that it was in the heat of the moment, and that I had no control over what I'd done, but then I'd be lying to myself. I knew exactly what I was doing. I let my anger take over because I was tired of pushing it away. I snapped and crushed the hand he had on me, twisting and snapping his arm to keep whatever filth he carried away from me. He was the monster, she was the tamer, and together they ruined the girl I failed to protect, the one person I couldn't save from being corrupted. And that was what pissed me off, what had me losing all sense of right and wrong. Them. Not the universe, or it's many criminals. Just them, because together. . .

They _ruined_ her.

"What are you doing!?" The woman screamed, panicking as the man fell to the ground in screams with his hand wrapped around his arm. I could have killed him, I could have ended him right then and there if I wanted to, and I _wanted_ to, but I was stopped by the barging in of the two teen heroes rushing to my rescue.

"Wally, calm down!" It was robin's familiar voice that pulled me back. That was what stopped me from causing anymore damage as they stood watching me, like they'd been doing this whole time, with the door now knocked down on the ground.

"I-I'm sorry. . ." I breathed, trying to regroup myself to keep focus on my original goal. Even though that felt nearly impossible due to the screams of the other beast coming from the corner.

"You little brats!" She pointed, rushing for the exit, "You better stay away from me or -" Silence returned along with peace after Raven stepped in, knocking the woman out with a swift kick to end the madness I'd started.

"What the hell was that all about?" Robin glared, pointing at the man who'd drifted off due to the pain in his arm and the woman on the floor who'd been rendered unconscious. He waited for an answer, an explanation for my actions, but I couldn't give him one. I couldn't because then I'd need to share everything, and even _I_ couldn't do that just yet. Not because I didn't trust him, but because it wasn't just information, it was a secret. A secret that wasn't mine to tell. . .

"They were hiding something. . ." I whispered to myself, ignoring the other two while in search for the cries I'd heard only seconds ago.

"What? Illegal weapons? Drugs?" Raven shared her thoughts, idea's that seemed possible, but didn't _feel_ right.

"I don't think so. . ." I shook my head, slowly making my way to the door a few feet away.

I moved in quietly and carefully, preparing myself for whatever would be found inside. But when I'd reached it, when I stood facing the chipped, wooden, entrance, all fear had vanished. It was gone, because this was the answer. This was what I needed to understand in order to make up for my betrayal. I wasn't scared. I really wasn't. At least, not in whatever was waiting for me to enter. _But_ , I did fear in what would happen after. I did fear in what the truth would do to me, that much was true, and when I slowly pushed open the entrance I knew. . .

I had every right to be.

It was dark at first, and that was all I could see - darkness. But as the light shed from down the hallway and into the room, there was more. There was detail in everything. The furniture, the walls, the broken lamp, the wooden boards covering the windows, and. . . the girl. A child, no older than ten, sat curled up in the corner with her head buried in between her legs. She trembled in fear the moment my presence became known to her and pushed herself against the wall, terrified of my purpose in entering.

"Please don't. . ." She whispered faintly, hiding her face behind long dark strands of hair, "Please. . ." She pleaded, begging through tears that couldn't be seen but heard through her shaky tone. Her actions formed guilt in the deepest corner of my heart, reminding me of how similar her behavior toward me matched to that of the misunderstood criminal who'd been roaming around my city in disguise for months. . .

"Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you. I'm one of the good guys. . ." I tried making my presence safe, holding my hands up to appear so that I wouldn't pose as a threat to her in anyway.

"I j-just wanna go to bed now. . ." She cried, shivering as the harsh wind blew against her through the gaps of wooden boards on open windows.

"Okay, okay, I can help you with that." I nodded, stepping forward and kneeling down to extend my hand to her, "Here just give me your-" She didn't need to say anything, instead she simply hid her face between her knees in response that I couldn't be trusted. Whatever this room was, whatever had happened, she wouldn't put her faith in anything that existed within it. . .

"That man. . . did he hurt you?" I asked, taking my hand back as she slowly rose her head to speak.

"M-Miss Amber said I h-had to play with him. . ." Her words shocked me, sending a painful twinge through my chest after triggering the memories of my encounter with the Adam's girl in the past.

 _"I never saw their faces. I just did what I was told. I never wanted to. . . to. . ."_

If that was true, if this was what they both referred to, then that meant this house, this entire area, was based on the corruption of innocent lives. The men who entered, the man in the hallway, and the woman in charge, together they had toyed with each child like pieces of property. Meant to satisfy their own lustful needs and desires by breaking those trapped here, all of them, _including_ Rose. . .

 ** _My Rose._**

"What's your name, sweetie?" I asked, keeping myself at a safe distance from the frightened child in front of me. She seemed hesitant to answer, but she somehow managed to speak after bringing her head up all the way, letting the strands of hair fall back to reveal the cuts and bruises that had been left marked on her face. . .

"R-Ruby. . ." She stuttered, still afraid yet hopeful as she watched me carefully. If it wasn't the markings on face, her legs, and arms, that made it difficult to look at her, then it was the fact that despite the two being very different, she reminded me of _her_. The dark hair, pale skin, and hazel eyes. . . It was like I was looking back at the girl I'd met as a child. The girl I couldn't rescue on my own, and it was as if I'd been given a second chance. A way to make up for my sins, even if deep inside I knew it wouldn't change anything. Rose would always be burdened with that trauma, and she'd still be an enemy on the field, but still. . .

"That's a pretty name." I tried to smile, glancing over at the two teens watching from the doorway before returning back to the frightened little girl, "Ruby, what if I said I could promise to take you somewhere Miss Amber couldn't hurt you ever again. Would you let me?" Her eyes lit up at my offer, twinkling like any ordinary child would when given the chance at something far greater in their life, but something brought that to vanish instantly. As if someone had yanked all hope away from her all over again. . .

"I can't go." She whispered, tears creeping down as she tried wiping them away, "I can't leave my friends behind. . ."

 _"Like I'd ever abandon my family."_

The child appeared to be a fairly newer version of Jinx in the process of falling. The way they thought, spoke, they truly felt alone. They felt they couldn't trust anyone, even when help was right there in front of them. They wouldn't listen to reason. They couldn't after all that had happened. And that wasn't their fault. It was ours. We never listened, I never paid any attention, even when it was happening right in front of me during my stay here. I was selfishly focused on myself and that was it, so much that hundreds of children had fallen victim to the worst crime of all. They had lost themselves - no, they couldn't even recognize themselves. Good or bad, that didn't matter anymore. It was all about hate, just like jinx, but there was no way I'd allow that process to continue on. I wouldn't let this girl keep falling, and I wasn't going to let jinx drown in her own destruction. Not again, not now, because this time. . .

I'd save them.

"Well, what if I said they could all come to? That you'd all be safe? Would you let me help you then?" Her head shot up with hopeful eyes, and she nodded with tears streaming down her face. I smiled at her reaction, proud of the progress made in such little time, and extended my hand out once again for her to take.

"Then come with me. . ." She met my gaze then stared at my fingers, hands tucked around her legs, as she hesitated whether or not to follow me. I thought for a moment on what to say and do, what a child would need to hear in order to gain their approval, their respect. If it were Rose, what would she have wanted to hear. . . then it hit me.

 **"You can trust me."**

She seemed less tense after hearing me speak, and slowly rose from the ground on her own. I took my hand back, watching as she stared at me, studying me from head to toe. Then, she began to move again. Stepping forward, carefully, toward me. And before I could even process what was going on she threw her arms around me, clinging onto me like any scared child would, and began to cry again. She buried her face in my neck, sobbing out loud, and I couldn't help but do the same, quietly, as I held her in my arms.

"Y-You promise?" She hiccupped.

"Yeah... " I nodded, hiding my own tears as I lifted her off the ground and carried her out the door. "I won't let them hurt you again." I vowed, hoping my words would not only reach her, but to the one I truly wanted to say it to. The girl I wanted to protect with everything I had, and all that I was, because. . . because I cared about her? Because she was my friend? No. . .

It was _more_ than that.

"The police are on their way. . ." Raven announced, leaning against the doorway in the hall.

"Wally?" Robin nudged, trying to meet my gaze while I tried avoiding his in order to wipe my own tears away.

"Thanks guys." I smiled and closely held the girl that had been resting in my arms.

"Raven, take the kid upstairs and find out how many more might be up there?" Robin ordered.

"You seriously want to leave me to take care of a bunch of. . ." Their eyes met mid sentence, and she silenced herself before she could finish her argument, "Whatever." She rolled her eyes, holding her arms out to reach for the kid in my hands.

"It's okay," I whispered in the girls ear, pulling her away to meet her eyes, "She's not as scary as she looks." I joked, only to be kneed in the back by the emotionless teen who lacked in all sense of humor.

"Come here kid," Raven glared, taking the child from out of my hands carefully.

"Girls are too sensitive. They can't ever take a joke!" I yelled loud enough for her to hear, rubbing the pain in my back, knowing there wasn't much the half-demon female could do with a child in her hands as they disappeared up the staircase.

"How did you find out about this?" Robin spoke up, trying to return the seriousness of the situation back into the conversation.

"I didn't." I shrugged, laying my back against the wall, "Someone just kept dropping breadcrumbs, so I decided to follow them back here."

"Meaning?"

"It doesn't matter. We should have been doing our jobs better - all of us. If we had paid attention we would have noticed their cries for help. . ."

"Wall's this wasn't our fault-"

"Then who's was it!?" I snapped, "What good are we if we couldn't even do that much!? The reason people go around breaking laws, is because we never listen! That's why they hate us! Why she can't trust me!"

"What?" Confusion struck both of us, and I felt like an idiot for letting my own guilt take over and slip out on it's own, "You're talking about Jinx, aren't you? What does she have to do with any of this?"

"Nothing. . ." I couldn't say anymore. I couldn't. I wouldn't risk exposing her in anyway, even if it killed me. I had already done enough damage as it is. . .

"Don't move!" Robin yelled, but the command wasn't directed to me. Instead, he stood facing the woman on the floor slowly waking from Raven's attack. Once she was aware of the situation she got up, shaking from fear of us with her hands held up to surrender.

"P-Please, I give up." She begged, crying hysterically after realizing what would be facing her now. Time in jail, away from her home for years, that would be her punishment. . . but it would _never_ be enough. The lives she'd destroyed, the children she'd terrorized, there was nothing the law could do that would best suit her crime.

"Wally, don't!" Robin tried ordering me like all the others, but was unable to stop me from speeding over and slamming the woman's body against the wall. She did this. She was responsible for all of it and she needed to pay. If not by jinx, then who better than me to do it in her place.

"Please!" She cried, struggling to escape my force in keeping her faced pressed against a stained, chipped, wall.

"Wally, let her go." He commanded again, far angrier at my refusal in obeying him like the rest of his teammates.

"Why should I? It shouldn't be fair that she gets to walk out of this scot-free. . ."

"She won't. She _will_ be punished, you're just not thinking clearly right now." He tried reaching through, trying to get me to realize the difference between my wrongs and my rights. And he succeeded. I wouldn't kill her, I couldn't or I'd lose myself completely, but I wasn't letting her go. Not just yet.

"What did you guys do with her?" I asked, bringing her body around to face me.

"W-What?"

"Adam's! Rose Adam's! You erased her files! Why? What did you do with-"

"Please I was only following orders. . ." She interrupted, choking on her own tears as she struggled to breathe.

"Orders? From who?"

"I don't know. All they wanted were children that could be easily forgotten. They threatened to kill me!"

"Who did it!?" I screamed in her face, placing an arm against her neck to keep her pinned against her will.

"A woman. . ." She sobbed, "She never told me her name. . ."

"Wally, that's enough. . ."

"What woman?" I kept asking, trying to dig as deep as I could to figure out what it was she wasn't telling me.

"I don't know, she was tall with dark hair. . . a-and spoke with a foreign accent."

"Foreign accent?" I squinted, refusing to believe who she was trying to hint at.

"Russian?" The boy wonder asked, trying to pile everything together.

"Yeah, something like that."

"Sounds like someone we might know."

"No," I shook my head, releasing the woman and allowing her to drop to the ground and breathe, "It can't be her." I told the teen standing behind me.

"Wally we can't rule her out just yet-"

"You don't get it. It's impossible!" I cut him off, pushing past him to pace myself in the hall.

"Why?"

"Because then it would mean that. . ." I silenced myself, knowing very well what it would mean if I shared that information out loud. But it wasn't adding up. The only reason Jinx had been doing all of this was to gain her mother's approval, at least that's what it seemed like. That, and getting revenge on the people who did this to her, who gave her those powers. But if all of this had started with her mother, if it had all been because of the Russian criminal, then that meant Jinx had never been in control to begin with. She'd just been a spawn, toyed with to get right to where she was now. This was all part of their plan, it had to be, and that meant Jinx's hatred had never been real. It wasn't the government she truly hated, that was their decoy, what they wanted her to hate in order for her to rise against us. All the corruption, power, and lies, it all started because of that woman. Meaning, jinx had fallen right into their little game. All this time, they had been controlling her like a pet, a puppet, an object, and the one pulling the strings. . .

 **Was her own _mother_.**


	38. Chapter 37: No More Running Away

Chapter 37: No More Running Away

Jinx

My body and mind no longer felt solid, instead twisting and bending as my own emotions overflowed within me. Everything was spiraling out of control, all at once that even street lights moved past me like shooting stars. Stars I had wished upon as a child for a moment like this - but it couldn't be true. It couldn't be real. . .

 _She_ couldn't be real.

"Terra!" My screams shocked all of those in the area as I called out to the girl on the other side, my body held up against a pole to keep me balanced. If I was really dreaming, if any of this was truly my imagination, then I had to make the most of it. I couldn't let myself wake up just yet. . .

But my heart nearly burst the moment she whipped around in search for my voice. I was right. I had to be right. There she was, only a few feet away, smiling and laughing with a group of people her age moments ago, and now. . .

She was staring.

She was watching me, squinting as if the idea of me being there felt just as impossible in her mind. But judging how hard the universe kept trying to pull us apart, I gave up in waiting. I gave up in her returning to me on her own. I had to, that was how I'd survived each time she'd been taken away. . .

But not again.

I raced past the crowd and onto the streets, dodging any vehicle moving towards me until I had made it to the other side. There, _here_ , she stood around with strangers she seemed to be fairly close with. Each of them staring as if waiting for an explanation. And so, I steadied myself for a moment, trying to bend down to catch my breath in order to speak again, but before I could say anything. . .

She stepped forward.

"Are you okay?" She asked, eyes filled with concern for me - the dweeb in glasses and messy hair still wearing the pair of pajama's the redhead's guardian had lent me. But If it weren't for terra, if I hadn't been so caught up in finally reuniting with her again, I would have probably died of embarrassment a long time ago. . .

"It's really you, isn't it?" I smiled, pushing myself back up in excitement, "You're really here. . ."

"I'm sorry? Do I know you?" She blinked, stepping back in her failed attempt to recognize me. How could she? How could anyone when dressed like this? Unless. . .

It was more than just that. . .

"It's me, T. I-It's rose. . ."

"Rose?" She repeated, as if she were trying to search for an image in her head to match my face and name. Thinking carefully to herself as seconds continued to pass.

"Oh that's our ride!" Said the freckled face girl in the background, tugging on the blonde's shirt to get her attention, "You sure you don't want a lift back, Sam?" The blonde looked back at her friends who'd been spying on us, eagerly waiting for her to take their offer and leave together. That didn't bother me though, they were being cautious - it was to be expected. However, I had not expected to see the blonde girl respond to them in a different name, not as Terra. . . but as _Sam_.

"Um. . ." She seemed hesitant looking back at me, but her answer wasn't something I'd expected to hear at this point, "No, I'll be fine. I promised my dad I'd wait for him to pick me up anyway." She smiled at them, stepping over to my side in her own way of sending them off.

"Alright, just be careful. . ." Another girl said, one with dark skin and ebony hair scowling at me before they turned away and left.

The blonde stood beside me, waving and smiling at her friends until they entered the backseat of a car and drove off. I had messed up, I had let myself slip again. Of course it couldn't have been her. The rumors had been true for the most part, they had been confirmed by my own teammates. Terra was dead. That meant she was never coming back. . .

"I'm sorry, I must have mistook you for-"

"I didn't expect to run into you like this. . ." She interrupted, slowly returning her gaze to me, "You look so normal, I almost couldn't recognize you at first." She smiled again, only this time it was different - it was genuine and familiar - and her words gave me a strong sense of reassurance. . .

 _"Terra?"_

"Sorry for lying, but you caught me off guard back there. . ." She laughed, trying to break the awkward tension we'd formed between us. And it was just that - awkward, but that's to be expected of someone you hadn't spoken to or seen in years. We were practically strangers at this point in our lives, it didn't matter how close we used to be. Even so, I couldn't stop my own tears from escaping. She was dead, at least that's what we'd thought in our heads. We hadn't lost her once, but twice, and now we'd been given another chance to take her back. . .

Tears spewed out on their own as I lunged forward to take her in my arms. It didn't matter how much had changed, how much we might have changed, because this was family. She was family. She was what I'd tried so hard to protect, the little girl who looked up to me as a child, the girl I had left behind. . .

My sister.

"I'm not dreaming, right?" I whispered weakly, clutching onto golden strands in fear she'd disappear right in front of me again. . .

"No," She said, letting out a faint laugh to hide the fact that she herself was shaking too, "This is real. . ."

 **~ . . . ~**

Half an hour flew by, sitting in silence on an empty bench, as we tried reorganizing ourselves. There was no time to waste on tears, not when there was so much that needed to be asked, questions that needed answering. So, I'd need to start at the beginning - no, I needed an answer to something we'd all been wondering. What had wrecked all of us from the start. . .

"We thought you were dead?" I asked in a faint whisper, staring straight ahead in fear I'd break down again if our eyes met now.

"You're not the only one. For a while, I thought I was too. . ."

"What do you mean?" I tried glancing over at the girl who'd been watching me the entire time.

"It's complicated." She shrugged, shaking her head and smiling as if that answer would be enough for me. . .

But it wasn't.

"You teamed up with the titans, and you never searched for us. . . _why_?" I spoke tonelessly, partly afraid in hearing her answer if it hinted towards even the slightest bit of betrayal. Everyone spoke about it after all, the traitor who'd managed to play both sides without revealing her true purpose. But as long as I knew the truth, as long as she was honest with me, then there'd be nothing left to forgive - because then she wouldn't have done anything wrong. . . at least not in my eyes.

"Like I said," She inhaled deeply, staring down at her feet to dodge the question again, "It was complicated back then."

"How?" I asked sternly.

"I did try searching for you," She said urgently, "Believe me I did. I just never knew where to start. . ." Our eyes were locked on one another, and I tried searching for the answer within them. But I wouldn't get it unless she told me, unless she let it all out, because all I could see was that there was more to it. There was more than what the rumors mentioned. More to her, more to the situation. . .

There had to be.

"We all thought they'd killed you after we broke out." I tried changing the topic, hoping to get a clear view of the truth if I started with our past, "How did you escape? Did they let you go or - " The sound of her laughter cut me off as she sat there smiling up at the sky.

"Like they'd ever let anyone go. . ." She paused, shaking her head at the absurdity of even asking, "No, I had help from a friend."

"Friend?" I repeated, trying to think back on those who would have risked taking the chance at escaping a second time. It didn't seem to fit any of the other children's descriptions, until it suddenly hit me, "You mean -"

"It doesn't matter." She cut me off, not wanting to play any guessing games that would reveal whoever it was that had let her out. After all, she always had someone on her side back then. . . "We split up after we escaped, and I went on my own to look for the rest of - "

"What about the titans?" I quickly asked, trying to rush straight to where the rumors had began. The only gossip I found useful behind prison bars. She was famous after all, the only girl to have ever gotten so close to the enemy before her mysterious 'death'.

"Rose, you have to understand that I was _alone_. I came to this city to find you, that was it, I swear. But the titans found me first and when they did. . . things kinda fell out of my control." Her eyes slowly fell to the ground in shame, clearly trying to erase a memory she didn't want to regain. A moment, or many moments, in time that brought along guilt and sadness that had now resurfaced in her mind.

"What do you mean?" I felt ashamed in trying to pry anymore out of her, but there wasn't enough for me to go on with what she'd been giving me. Actually, she hadn't really given me anything - at least not anything that could clear her name.

"There were secrets, things I learned when I was working with - no, against them. . ." She stopped herself from saying anymore, turning her head away to keep quiet.

"What aren't you telling me?" I asked, wanting so badly to hear what it was she was trying to keep from me. Another secret that I felt would never be shared, and I hated that. I hated how things left unspoken could easily drive a wedge between two people, between us, our family, but that didn't seemed to matter anymore. Not because she didn't care, but because whatever it was she was hiding seemed far more important to her now. . .

"We heard you were working with Slade?" Her head quickly whipped around to meet my eyes again, and her shocked stare gave her away immediately when I asked, "Is that true?"

"It was. . ." She sighed heavily, looking down to play with her fingernails nervously.

 _"Why?"_ My question came across angrier than I anticipated, but I was mad. I had every right to be whenever it came down to that man. . . "Don't you remember everything he did to-"

"I know exactly who he is," She said tonelessly, not caring about what it was I had to say because it didn't matter to her. She knew, and maybe she knew all along, "But I also needed his help. My powers weren't like yours Rose, they never let me be in control and wherever I went people kept getting hurt. . ."

"Terra. . ." I tried reaching for the girl who looked as if she were on the brink of tears. I had no right to judge her, no right to lecture her about any of this, because I could never understand all that she had endured on her own up until now. I had the guys with me, I had friends that had my back, a family to care for me - but not her. She was alone, she was always on her own, because I couldn't keep my promise. I couldn't get her out of their on time and because of that it drove her to whatever decisions she felt she needed to make at the time, and that killed me. But still, it was hard to feel sorry for her when she kept on speaking to defend her actions - as if they had never been wrong.

"He was also the only one who had the answer we needed." She stared up at me, hard and distant, speaking not as Terra the girl of my past, but the monster he had managed to take over. And I knew, somehow he had gotten what he'd always wanted. . .

He'd tainted her.

"It might sound stupid to you, but I really thought it'd benefit all of us if I stuck with him. I thought that the best way to get revenge would be to work with someone who knew all their secrets, and slade was the _only_ person I could manipulate enough to get what I wanted - "

"And did you?" I cut her off, watching her hatred dim in response.

"It doesn't matter now. . ." That was it. She wasn't planning on saying anymore that would help me figure out what it was she was hiding, and at this point I wasn't going to force it out of her. She wasn't ready, and maybe she'd never be. But she was still my sister, which was why I couldn't understand her current situation at all. . .

"What about now? Why didn't you come back this time? Why are you even here? _Like this_?"

"My ride's going to be here soon." She dodged the question and averted her eyes from me, searching around the street for a vehicle that would apparently take her away again if I didn't speak up.

"Okay, then let's meet up some place else instead. What time are you-"

"That's the thing. . ." She cut me off, her eyes never meeting mine as she spoke her true thoughts, "I don't want to meet with you again, not like this. . ."

Her words cut me deep, and I could hear the pounding in my chest that brought along the shattering glass of my heart to fall. I didn't get it, I honestly didn't. I understood that we had both changed, our lives were different now, but our past was still there. We were still connected in someway and we always would be - so why? Why was she trying so hard to sever all ties with me now. . .?

"What?" That was all I could manage to say in the moment.

"Rose. . ." She sighed, guilt driving her away from me as she stood back up alone, " If we're seen together it'll only be a matter of time before someone figures it out. I just can't risk being linked back to you, or the titans, when I've worked so _hard_ to start over again."

"What exactly do you want then?" I asked, angry as I approached her by removing myself off the bench to meet her eyes.

"I'm finally happy here. I really am. Which is why I can't let you destroy that when you and the other's are running around with your faces on the _Most Wanted_ list. . ."

"So that's it?" I laughed, masking my anger and rage toward the girls selfish request in trying to hide her connections with us all together, "After everything you're just going to throw us away like - "

"No, I'm giving you a choice." She cut in, her expression cold and serious, "Please, stop all of this already. Don't waste anymore of your life miserably chasing after something you won't find fulfilling. You'll only regret it. . ."

"So I should just give up?" I scoffed.

"Don't think of it as giving up, think of it as trading it in for something better." She smiled, reaching out to take my hand in hers, "We could be together again, we could be sisters again just like we promised. Please, Rose, you don't have to let hate control you anymore. You don't have to pretend to be _jinx_ anymore. . ." She finished, looking at me with hopeful eyes in waiting for my answer. The idea of it felt nice, being normal, being free of everything. . . but it'd be a lie. It wouldn't be me, because it wouldn't be real. It couldn't exist. . .

 _Rose Adams_ could never truly exist.

"The only one pretending here is you." I glared, yanking my hands out of hers, "Being jinx, that's real. That's who I am. This whole fantasy you have going on is just that - a fantasy."

"You might be right. . ." She nodded, stepping back with the same smile on her face, "But I'm happy here, and you can be too if you came with me. . ." She whispered softly, barely audible with the sound of engines running in the background, but she extended her hand out to me. Eyes pleading for me to come with her, part of me begging to listen in hopes it could be true. But that's how I knew it was wrong. Being hopeful was always wrong, because in the end all it'd ever gotten me was misfortune. I couldn't be happy, I wasn't blessed with that luxury, and if I kept trying to chase after it. . .

I'd only be fooling myself.

"It won't last. Only an idiot would be dumb enough to think it ever could. . ." I caught a glimpse of the pained expression she had on for a moment, hurt by my own rejection, by _me_ \- something I never expected in this life.

Years I'd prayed for her to come back to me, hoping to make amends for what I'd done, but now that I had the chance too I chose to drive her away. All those memories, our youth, I don't think either of us had ever expected it to result to this. We had gotten older, our desires had changed, at least her's had. Mines, however, seemed to be the only one left kept focused on our original goal. Even if she couldn't do it anymore, even if that meant I had to go in alone, maybe it would have all been for the best. If I couldn't be happy, at least one of us could. . .

"That's my ride. . ." She said, waving at a vehicle driving in to park.

"Then you should probably go." I told her, hoping for the rest of this day to end and disappear from my memory all together. It was my own fault in hoping, in calling out to her, thinking things could ever go back to how they were. I was naïve for a moment, I had lost myself, but I understood now. This. . .

This was my mistake.

"My school. . ." I heard her say, as she waited for me to look at her before continuing, "It's only a few blocks away from here. If you ever feel like changing your mind, you can find me there." She said, still smiling as if everything was okay in her mind before heading past me in the direction of her ride. Nothing mattered to her at this point, why would it? Whether I was in or out of her life, it didn't matter - because she was happy. She was safe, she was free, and for the first time she was being selfish. I hated that, I hated it more than anything, because. . .

I was envious.

"I guess the rumors were right. . ." Jealously managed to blurt out on it's own as we both turned around to look at each other one final time. . .

"You really are a traitor."

Wide eyes stared back at me, full of shock and despair. She was guilty, she felt bad, and that made part of me feel even better. But why? I never wanted to hurt her? I never wanted to make her upset. I just wanted her to be happy. So, why couldn't I accept that? Because I was jealous? Because of what she had? Because she could be free? No, it wasn't that. It was because I couldn't understand. Why was she the only one who could have it all. . .

 _Why?_

She didn't say anything at first, she only stood there quietly for a moment. But then, she began to move again, heading in the direction of her car and opening the door to toss her belongings inside. I'd expected her to leave, to pretend like she'd never heard me say anything in the first place. Instead, she stood there, gazing back at me with her car door held open.

"You can't win against the devil's work, Rose." She said, no emotion added her to face or tone whatsoever, "All you've been doing is scratching against the surface. Everything you knew, or thought you knew, were lies from the start. . ."

"What are you talking about?" I asked, hoping she'd come around in giving me the chance to better understand what it was she meant. What she was trying to hide.

"Just take my advice. You already escaped hell once, don't let yourself fall back in again. . ." And with that she slid herself inside, shut the door, and left with whoever else was with her inside.

She'd made her choice. She had her own future to think about, as I did mine. Our paths could never intersect again, some secrets forever left unshared. She wasn't the same child I'd grown up with or fought to protect. She'd changed, for better or for worse, but one thing was certain. She'd had abandoned us. She had chosen her own selfish desires over those that had cared for her, and although I was relieved she'd be safe now - it ticked me off greatly. But it brought me to better look at my own situation.

I couldn't run away anymore, not like this, not like _her_. I wouldn't let my fear control me like it did to her. I'd go home today, I'd work on earning back everyone's trust, and tomorrow I was going to take everything head on. Even in disguise, I wasn't going to give them the satisfaction in seeing me cowar away. I wasn't afraid of them, I wasn't afraid of West or Kid flash. I was going back, I was going to fix myself, because I was no coward. I needed to know whatever it was he knew, whatever more he could have been hiding, along with Linda. After all, she seemed like the only person who knew everyone else's secret and that was my goal. Just another thing to add on to my list, because if I could figure out everything they knew then I'd be the one in control. Which meant no more hiding, no more lies, and this time. . .

 **I wouldn't run away.**

* * *

 **Quick Note:**

And now I'll be working on both this story and Terra's. Any questions you might have been asking yourself while reading this chapter will all be answered in her story. Which will mean double the work for me, but this story is the one I'm mainly focusing on. So to the few of you who enjoy this fic, I hope you enjoyed this chapter too, but please be paitent. I'll try and update whenever I get the chance.

 **-Clover**


	39. Chapter 38: You Should Know

**This chapter was created through the help of this AMAZING song:**

 **Simple Plan**

 **Save You**

 **Be sure to give it a listen while reading.**

* * *

Chapter 38: You Should Know

Kid Flash

It was all over the place. Their story - _her_ story - it was everywhere. The secrets covered on every channel. Our eyes were glued to every reporters take on the house that had destroyed the lives of thousands of children - including _Rose_. Even Iris took her part in getting it all out there. But it wasn't so much that I was angry at them, the reporters, the men, or the woman running the place. It was just _me_. I knew there wasn't much I could have done back then, but I couldn't ignore the guilt. It kept eating at me every second I spent watching. Anger, shame, guilt - that was all I felt. . . but there was also fear. I was afraid. Afraid that _she'd_ see this on her own, and If she did. . .

What would she do?

"Why didn't you tell me?" Dick's voice rang through my ears, and I could feel his stare stuck on me.

"Tell you what?" I asked. Not hesitant, or nervous, even though I knew what it was he was referring to. I just didn't want to answer. I didn't want to hide anything else from him, but I knew he wouldn't rest. Which meant I'd have to keep even more secrets in the back of my mind. . .

"The whole reason we were going there was because of her, wasn't it?" His tone sounded rather bitter due to the lies he could clearly tell had been told in the past.

"I didn't think it'd matter." I shrugged, slouching down on the couch we sat on to continue watching the television blasting with the same reports.

"That girl. . ." He spoke quietly and almost uncertain, "She's the girl you met there wasn't she?"

"That's. . ."

There it was. It was pointless in trying to lie to the guy hell bent on uncovering any secret linked to cases like these. The only way to beat him was to keep silent. To keep it hidden and that way it wouldn't be a lie. It'd just be a secret. A secret that I should have never been told because now I'd have to choose. . .

Robin Or Jinx?

"Wally, I've seen Jinx's file. They're the same person aren't they?" He persisted, trying to force an answer out of me. But I couldn't give him a no, and I couldn't say yes either. So. . .

I said nothing.

"Did she tell you what was going on in there with. . ."

Neither of us could finish that sentence. We both just fell silent at the very thought of the inhumane acts that had occurred in that house for years. The torment, torture, and cruelty they had each endured alone. All of them trapped. . .

Because we failed to listen.

"She was here."

"What?"

"Jinx." I forced myself to say her name out loud, taking in deep breaths to reveal all that I could without giving too much away, "She was here."

"What was she doing-"

"She needed my help. I had to let her inside. . ." I could feel him judging me behind dark shades. In his mind, he must have surely thought I was a fool, some huge idiot for letting a wanted criminal into my home. But that's only because he didn't know. He didn't know _her_ , or much about us at all. He was going off of assumptions and that was it. . .

He'd never understand.

"You do realize how dangerous that could have been? Not just for you but for your fam-"

"She isn't the person you think she is, Rob. She's just confused. . ."

"She's a criminal."

"She's also a kid!" I blurted out, reeling my anger back in knowing very well that it was pointless in trying to get him to understand. It was impossible without telling him the whole story, and that's why he'd never see it. "She needed our help too . . ."

"Is that why you brought us there?" He added, eyebrows furrowing in speculation.

"I went there based on my discoveries." I muttered quietly.

"Walls," He sighed heavily, "I get that the two of you might share a small bond but-"

"It's not that." I shook my head, stopping him from jumping into a completely different theory on his own, "I don't think she's even aware of it, but I feel like she might have been pushed into all this from the start. . ."

"By who? Madam Rouge?" My eyes widen in utter shock as I stared back at the boy who was quick to find the truth on his own.

"How'd you-"

"You seemed on edge when I brought her up back there. . ." He said, eyes studying me closely as he moved in and asked, "What are you hiding from me?"

What was I suppose to say? The truth? How could I when I myself was still unsure with what that actually was yet. I might have been wrong, and it was still just a theory. But I knew one thing was certain. Someone else was behind all of this too. The actions made by her group, by each member of the Hive Five, weren't random. There was something bigger going on there, something that even _they_ didn't seem to be aware of themselves. . .

"I can't tell you right now."

"Wally you can't keep-"

"Dude, it's not that I don't trust you. I just want to be sure before I give anything away."

"And how exactly do you plan on figuring it out yourself?" He asked, doubting me almost as much as I doubted myself. But that was the big question wasn't it? How was I suppose to find the answers I needed? How was I suppose to get her to understand? How could I. . .

How could I get her to trust me this time?

"I don't know. . ." I mumbled, mostly to myself, but loud enough for the other to hear. He was angry, or more irritated than angry actually. He opened his mouth to say something, and I was ready to keep this up for as long as I could, but the creaking of a door opening saved us both from another session of arguing.

"Oh, you're both still up!" Said the familiar auburn haired woman entering the house alone.

"Back already, Aunt I?" I smiled, we both did in order to restore a better atmosphere for the outsider returning from another day at work.

"Yup! Thank you guys so much for calling me about that foster home fiasco. My boss loved the early scoop." She boasted, placing her keys on the counter with a huge smile on her face. It was nice seeing her happy like that. To have at least one person gaining something out of tonight's incident. But I'd be lying if I said part of me didn't feel slightly annoyed with the woman's behavior.

To her it was just a story. Yeah, maybe she'd feel bad about it in the morning, about the lives affected by all of this, but this was her job. It was her duty to expose the wounds inflicted on all those lives. And as much as I loved my Aunt, and cared for her, half of me saw her as another leech. A woman who fed off of others pain by sharing their suffering through social media. It was wrong but I couldn't help it. . .

Because someone I knew had gotten hurt in process.

"It was no trouble at all." Dick nodded, smiling at the woman before getting out of his seat to leave, "I should probably head out now."

"What? No butler buddy coming to pick you up this time?" I joked.

"I don't have any business with Bruce today, or _Alfred_. So I'll probably just catch a late bus home." He explained, not making eye contact with me at all despite my efforts in joking around with him.

"You can always stay here for the night." My Aunt offered, smiling brightly like she always did with all her guests.

"Yeah, we can stay up late, eat popcorn, and talk about cute redheaded aliens-"

"Pass." He raised a hand to my face, veins popping in his forehead, "Have a nice night." He said, and with that rushed for the door and left without another word.

"You shouldn't tease him like that!" My aunt yelled from the kitchen, pulling open the fridge door in search for anything appealing, "How you holding up?" She asked while examining whatever was left inside.

"I should be asking you that."

" _Please_ , I'm fine." She waved her hand and pulled out a water bottle hidden in the far back, "If anything it's that girl you should be worried about. She seemed really frightened this morning."

"She tried to _kill_ you."

"I don't think so. . ." She muttered, stopping to take a sip from her drink before continuing, "I've witnessed and interviewed murderers before, Wally. I could tell by her eyes that she wouldn't have gone through with it in that state."

"Her eyes?" I repeated to myself, thinking back to the pink haired feline during her stay in my home. I couldn't understand my Aunt's logic, nor did I get what she meant by that statement. But I did know that despite all the illegal acts Rose had commited in the past, she was hesitant about this one. I'm not sure if it could be read or seen through her eyes, but she was hesitant. If she had planned on killing anyone she probably wouldn't have let her victim go so easily.

"I was more surprised that you weren't aware of who she was at the beginning." She said nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders and placing her water down as if I was the only one who didn't know who this girl was. . .

"You knew? Since when?" I asked.

"I removed her ring the other night when I was getting her dressed. I recognized her from the reports in Jump city."

"Great!" I yelled, falling forward on the couch to bury my face into a pillow, "So everyone else knew about it but me!" I mumbled, my voice barely audible through a cushion.

"Have you heard anything from her since?" My ears managed to catch my Aunt's question, but the thought of it made me want to hide myself away completely instead.

"No. . ." I tried to say out loud, but it came out as more of a whisper instead.

"You might want to try contacting her instead if she hasn't already tried anything today."

"Oh yeah, sure," I pulled myself back up, peeking behind the couch to find my Aunt's heavy stare, "I'll just call up one of the country's deadliest criminals and ask her to come over and chat. Should we throw in some milk and cookies while we're at it?" I spoke sarcastically, flopping back over the cushions to stare at the ceiling defeated.

"It was just a suggestion." I heard her say while I listened to the sound of footsteps coming over as she made her way beside me, "So, how did you guys manage to find that place?" She asked, taking out her phone and nodding at the house on the TV screen police were still investigating.

"Jinx mentioned something about it when she-" I was cut off by the heavy sound of my Aunt's phone falling hard on the ground. She flinched after I spoke, and instead of picking up the small device she stared at the screen with eyes wide.

"S-She was in there?" She stuttered, slowly turning over to me, "Why didn't you tell me she was a victim of -"

"What makes you think that?" I asked her, feeling that there was something more she knew that I myself didn't. And if I wanted to figure everything out myself I'd need as much information as I could get.

"I, uh. . ." She cleared her throat, "I noticed a scar on her lower back. She told me she got it from a bad home they placed her in. . ."

"A scar?" I moved in closer, picking up the cellphone on the ground to place back into the womans hands.

"Is that what you two were talking about in the morning?" Her question caught me off guard and I froze for a moment in reaction to what I thought was suppose to be a secret between me and the other girl. If our conversation had been heard, if my Aunt had listened to all of it, what more did she know? How much did she hear? And had she said anything to anyone since then?

"You heard us?"

"Not really. I only heard a few seconds of the conversation before I called you upstairs. . ." She explained, staring down at her mobile device before placing it back in her pocket.

"That girl you met in there. . ." She inhaled deeply, eyes falling to her feet as she continued and said, "That was her wasn't it?"

I stared at her for a long moment, debating whether or not to tell her when I couldn't even say it to the other teen minutes ago. But this was different, she wasn't robin. There wasn't much she could do with this information on her own, and she wouldn't take the risk in spreading it around either. It was frustrating, especially when everyone else was figuring it out faster than I ever could, but it was killing me not saying anything. . .

"Kid flash knew her secret, but she didn't know that _he_ was _me_. . ." I muttered quietly, relieved at the weight being lifted off in finally sharing it with someone else, "That's why she flipped when I came home this morning."

"That might have been my fault. . ." She murmured indistinctly.

"What do you mean?" I stared, watching her nervously playing with her finger nails.

"I did mention a few things about your stay in that house when she was here. . ."

"You told her!?" I jumped out of my seat, anger spewing out of me as I stood over her.

"I'm sorry!" She fidgeted, eyes shut tightly in fear and guilt, "I thought I was doing the normal parenting thing in talking about your younger years and. . ."

"Why'd you have to talk about _that_ though?" I groaned before falling back on the couch and burying my face in my hands, "At least I know how she figured it out _now_."

"Sorry. . ."

"It doesn't matter anyway." I sighed, figuring it'd be best to let it all go at this point. "Not like she would have ever trusted me to begin with. . ." I shrugged, my eyes returning to the screen again.

"You don't know that." She tried comforting me, smiling with hopeful eyes to better lift my spirits, "You still have a chance. You two can still-"

"Still what?" I forced out a laugh, a laugh made to mask my own guilt and pain that it tore itself out of my throat, "Don't you get it Aunt I? She was in that house _alone_. No matter what I do she'll never trust me, because I'm a _guy_. Which means to her I'll always be an enemy. I'm no better than them. . ."

Nothing was said for a long time. She didn't speak up and I couldn't figure out where to go from there. All I could do, was drown myself in my own guilt and shame. At the idea and image of those men laying a hand on someone I knew and cared about. It would have messed anyone up, but the fact that it was _Rose_ made it even harder. Rose, the girl who didn't care what anyone thought, the quiet, innocent, dweeb that kept having everything thrown at her for doing _nothing_. That's what made it worse, because she didn't deserve any of it. Yet, she was constantly being punished and tormented for simply breathing. . .

And it _sickened_ me.

"Wally, what do you think girls need the most in their life?" She suddenly asked, nudging my arm to get my attention again.

"I don't know, money? Clothes? Jewelry?" I tried to guess, but she shook her head every time.

"Reassurance." She said with a smile, and I gave her a confused frown in return.

"Huh?"

"That goes for everyone actually. It's normal to want someone who can always stick by us. Someone who can tell us that it'll all be okay. . ." She paused, leaning close to my ear to whisper, "That's how we learn to trust again."

"C'mon on, Aunt I," I pulled away, scooting to the farther end of the couch, "You saw her. You heard what she said. She'll never see me as anything more than a threat."

"Maybe at first yes," She nodded, and tried scooting over to get closer again, "But if she didn't _want_ to try trusting you, do you honestly think she would have let you stay in the same room with her last night?"

I opened my mouth to fight back. Not wanting to believe it could be as easy as she thought. After all, I couldn't even touch Rose for more than a second without having her flip out. But, she did have a point. If she hated me _that_ much, and wanted nothing to do with me. . .

Why did she stay?

 _"I can't sleep in the dark by myself. . . If you go downstairs I won't be able to. . ."_

Was that really the reason? Of all the things she feared, could that have been the only reason why she asked me to stay? And if it was, wouldn't it have scared her even more? To have me, an enemy, sleep close by in a dark room? If I thought about it like that it really didn't make any sense. So why. . .?

"It might not be easy for either of you," She began, getting back on her feet to head for the stairs, "But if you both don't put any effort into _trying_ then nothing will ever change."

"Then what do I do?" I asked, standing up to follow her in the same direction before she came to an abrupt stop.

"Talk to her." She yawned.

"But she won't listen to-"

"Then get her to listen. Go to school tomorrow, approach her first and show her you don't mean her any harm. Just be honest with her. . ."

"Will that really work?"

"You won't know unless you try." She smiled and ruffled my hair before she continued her way up the steps. "By the way, I'm cancelling next months allowance."

"What? Why!?" I yelled, making her stop halfway to look back and glare at me from above.

"I don't mind if you ditch practice every now and then, but running off to play hero with your friends in a different city without telling me _anything_ is a huge No! So, you're getting cut off for making me worry.

"Seriously?" I whined, finding it unfair when she herself gained more out of it in the end, "Whatever then. . ." I sighed heavily and returned to the couch after she disappeared into her bedroom.

I flopped on the couch and pulled out my cell phone, rummaging through new messages and missed phone calls in the living room. I still had the team to worry about, and Stacy. Whatever they'd say or do made me feel even more anxious as I sat dreading for a new tomorrow. Even though it was my decision to be honest with myself, and everyone else, it didn't make it any easier. But nothing was ever easy when it came to _her_.

She'd left the phone I'd given her which meant contacting her would be impossible at this point. But even if she had taken it, I probably wouldn't have had the courage to call her at all. I couldn't even race over and face her now. How was I suppose to do that at this point? How could I win her over when she kept trying to push me away? It was impossible to reason with her in the past, so I felt uncertain about everything else in my mind. . .

But there was one thing I _was_ sure about.

I would go to school tomorrow, that was a given. I'd face all the guys and everyone else whether I liked it or not. And if for some miracle she decided to stay and show up, then I'd speak to her. That much I was certain about. Whether or not I'd tell her about her mother was something I still needed to look over, because it wouldn't guarantee anything. If anything she probably wouldn't believe me, and if she did then she'd feel alone again. The place she made for herself, on that side, on that team, that was her home. If I took that away from her then what would be left? There was still so much I needed to decide. There was still a lot I wasn't sure about as well, but. . . there was one more thing. One more thing I was truly certain about. . .

And it was _her_.

Or better yet, my feelings for her. Even if she couldn't trust me, or kept denying me, it wouldn't change how I felt. And even though I was still undecided on what I _couldn't_ say to her, I could at least tell her _this_. My feelings for her, where she stood in my life, and what I wanted. Even if she couldn't accept me, I wasn't going to let her succeed in keeping me away. She might have excelled greatly at everything else, but I wasn't going to let her beat me at this. I wasn't going to let her walk away because I knew she could feel it too. It was different from everything else. She was different from everyone else. Whether she was good or bad, that didn't matter at this point. All I could see was her, not jinx, not a criminal, but _her_. The _real_ her, because that was who I needed. That was who I wanted, and I knew she wanted that too. This was what was suppose to happen. What should have happened if she hadn't gotten taken that night. And if she continued forcing me out, then I'd have no choice but to keep forcing myself back in again. It was already too late to ignore it at this point, because whether she accepted it or not it was still a fact and it was clear now, and maybe it had been for longer than either of us would care to admit. But I wanted this. She wanted this. We both did, because this was what we needed. We needed each other, and that's what I would tell her tomorrow. That I needed her, that I wanted just her, and nothing else because it was obvious. I didn't just like her, I didn't want to be just friends, because she already knew. . .

 **That I had fallen for her right from the start.**

* * *

Important Notice:

This story is now **cancelled.**

. . .

No I'm **totally** **kidding**. I just wanted to get your attention.

I do plan on finishing this story as quickly as I can. The only problem I have is the ending. I have an ending set for the story, I always have, and I don't plan on changing it. **But** it's come to my attention that people who **actually** read this fic _**MIGHT** _ not enjoy the ending as much as I will. Again, I don't plan on changing the ending **HOWEVER** I am open to the idea of creating an **Alternate Ending** too.

 **Meaning?**

If you want this couple to end EXACTLY as it did in the show then I'll be more than happy to write that as an alternate ending for THIS story. But **ONLY** if you feel that you won't enjoy my take on the ending or trust me enough to end it the way I WANT IT. If so, speak now and message me or leave a review telling me which it is you want. Depending on how many people actually want me to create a separate ending for them based off the TV series I may or MAY NOT post it. Again, it's all on you.

I'll also be sharing the songs I used in the process of writing each chapter from here on out. Today's chapter was created with the help of:

Save You By Simple Plan.

Also don't forget to check out my instagram for flinx edits and news on the next updates.

Thank you for your time and please enjoy the rest of your day.

-Clover


	40. Chapter 39: Beyond My Control

_**When She Cries**_

 _(Britt Nicole)_

 _Every day's the same_  
 _She fights to find her way_  
 _She hurts, she breaks,_  
 _she hides, and tries to pray_  
 _She wonders why,_  
 _does anyone ever hear her when she cries?_

* * *

 **Chapter 39: Beyond My control**

 **Jinx**

I hated it. I hated being here. The moment I stepped foot on campus I knew I'd regret it, but it was too late to run away now. I wouldn't be a coward. I wouldn't be a traitor. I wouldn't be like _her_. . . I couldn't be.

I'd face everything and everyone head on. Even if that meant filling the rest of my days with stares and whispers on every corner. At least this time I knew it wasn't my fault. It was _his_. My luck had only gotten worse the day he stepped foot into my life, and not just as a child but in the city too. If he hadn't wrecked our plans that night, if he hadn't belonged to this school, then maybe my life would have turned out a lot easier. . .

I just wanted to forget. I _needed_ to forget about everything, about _him_ if I wanted to survive. I had others to worry about, things I needed to get done, and I couldn't distract myself anymore with the thought of him. So I'd forget this time. I'd erase him completely from my life. The dance, the after school meetings, the kiss. . .

All of it.

This was just a reminder. My wake up call to reality in realizing that none of it could ever be real. The thought of him, the idea of us, it was all a fantasy he'd created in my head and I was _sick_ of it. I was sick of him toying with my head. I was sick of hoping that I could _ever_ stand a chance. . . at greatness. . .

At _happiness_.

But we were too different. We could never be what the other desired. I could never be what he craved, because I was never the girl he thought I was. I don't even think that girl ever existed to begin with. All I knew was that the person I'd become had set one goal in my mind, and that was revenge. Nothing else. It was better this way. _We_ were better this way, as enemies, rather than allies or friends. . .

Because he _deserved_ better.

 _"Why can't you see that this doesn't define you. It never has - so stop blaming yourself for it!"_

Even if he were right, even if I was more than a used _vessel_ or a _monster_ , it wouldn't change anything now. I had a job to do and I wasn't going to give that up now. And there was nothing he could say or do that could ever make me think otherwise. That I could ever be more than _this_. . .

 _"Rose Adam's, please report to the Teachers Lounge. I repeat; Rose Adam's, please report to the Teachers Lounge immediately."_

 **~ . . . ~**

"Miss Adam's, thank goodness I caught you before class." The familiar voice of my Biology teacher called me from the far end of the room. He sat in an empty table with no other teacher around. It was odd for a student to be called into this area at any given time, but by the cups of coffee he had around him, and the set of heavy bags underneath his eyes, I figured he had his own reasons for choosing this setting.

"You wanted to speak to me, Mister Fisher?"

"Yes, about your grade." He began, sorting through stacks of paper placed in front of him, "I wanted to apologize for endangering your chances of passing my class by pairing you with that, um. . . boy."

"West?" I blinked, confused with where the conversation was headed or its purpose.

"Yes. I know you're the one who'd been doing all the work at the beginning, but I was never actually going to fail _you_. . ." He explained, rubbing his temples as he tried remaining in focus during our conversation, "I only said that because I was hoping you would rub off on the lad. I've had him in so many of my summer classes, I just prayed that maybe -"

"It's fine, I understand. He can be difficult at times when it comes to academics rather than athletics." I tried to smile, dreading even talking about the boy when I'd only just decided to erase him from my life completely.

"Exactly. I just wanted to thank you. I've noticed him paying better attention in class recently, taking notes and turning in work on time. I feel like that may have all been because of -"

"You shouldn't underestimate him, Mister fisher." I stopped him, knowing very well that this man was just another one of the many that had been fooled by the redhead's stupid act in playing dumb, "There's actually a lot more to him than you might think."

"Perhaps." He nodded and picked up his cup of coffee before waving me off, "Well, I'll see you in class soon."

I nodded once and watched him take a sip from his drink before I headed for the exit. It was annoying being dragged into something like this so early in the morning, and I knew it'd already be hard enough to avoid speaking to the redhead when I was stuck with him all day. But what irritated me even more was having to defend the idiot in his place. All of this out of fear of hurting everyone else, and it labeled him a meathead. . .

What an idiot.

 _"In other news, the world has been going non-stop about last nights fiasco in Central City folks. . ."_

The buzzing of the TV's news report caught my attention on the way out. The usual news anchors spreading shame and lies through the comfort of their studio miles away from any _real_ danger. Yet, they went on sharing the lives and suffering of others like it was no big deal. It disgusted me, all of them did. They claimed to want a better future for our world, but their jobs required doing nothing but digging into the dark side of peoples lives and exposing it to everyone else. . .

It disgusted me.

But this was different. This time it wasn't lies, it wasn't _good_ either, but it was truth. There they redirected their camera's into an old wooden house. A house I had no trouble recognizing despite the years that had flown by. It was the same. Exactly the same. Even during the day, with police cars parked all around it. Still, it ticked me off. To hear that someone else had exposed the true nature of that home before I could even destroy it myself. . .

And then I saw it.

I saw him.

He had aged, but it was definitely him. The mug shot of the man that lit up on the screen beside the woman responsible for all of this. It was him without a doubt. The being that started it all. The creature that had left a mark on my entire body after the first night. . .

 _"Don't worry, Rosie. We're just going to play a little game, that's all. . ."_

"Are you alright?" It was fishers voice that pulled me back. He stood by me, a hand placed on my shoulder to grasp my attention again. "Do you need the nurse?"

"N-No, please excuse m-me. . ." That was all I managed to say before I gained control of my legs again and rushed out the door.

It wasn't that I was scared of that man, or my past. I just never expected to see their faces this soon. Even if it was just a picture on a TV screen, just knowing that he was still there, still alive, made me slip right back. Back to when I was nothing but a body, a toy, useless and weak, and just. . .

 _Dirty_.

I ran straight into the girls bathroom and toward the sink. There wasn't enough water in the world to wash it away, no matter how hard I scrubbed I could still feel it. It was there. It was always there. That's why I couldn't change, because I couldn't make it go away. I'd always be the same, stuck like this _always_. That's why _he'd_ never understand. . .

Wally or Kid flash, it didn't matter who he was because he didn't know me. He didn't understand me, no one did, and that was fine, I didn't even want to understand myself. All I wanted was to finish my job and hopefully that would make it all go away. If I could make something of myself then maybe I could face my reflection peacefully. I wouldn't be staring at something that was filthy, but something that was worthy. That's why it was better this way. Why he was better off without me, and why I didn't need him holding me back. Unlike him, or everyone else, I was marked, I'd always be marked, and because of that I. .

I'd never be pure again.

"Hey loser." The door slammed shut, making me flinch and gaze over at the blonde striding in confidently on her own.

"What do you want now?" I stood back, shutting off the sink to move away and keep a great distance between us.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to do anything to you." She rolled her eyes and faced her reflection, carefully running her hands through her hair as she spoke.

"Then why are you here?" I asked, placing my back against the wall as support in keeping myself balanced.

"I just wanted to apologize." She shrugged, glancing over at me casually.

"Really?" I raised a brow, knowing very well there was always more to the girls words then most people figured.

"Well I was going to. I mean, it's not like I was trying to get you killed that night. But you did steal wally away from me so. . ."

"I never stole anything from-"

"But no matter how awful I think you are. . . you didn't deserve that." She frowned, looking almost as guilty as any regular human being. But even though what she did was unnecessary and uncalled for, I didn't hate her. In fact, I didn't know who to blame honestly. I heard the redhead's take on their story, and I knew part of hers, which made me feel almost sorry for the girl who'd been played in the process of all of this. . .

Because it wasn't her fault.

"Stacy, I don't know why you felt so threatened by me but-

"Yes you do." She laughed, clearly forced before she continued, "I just don't get what it is that had him racing back to you all the time." She shook her head at the idea of it, and I couldn't help but do the same.

"We're just lab partners." I stated, drawing a line in my head between me and the other boy, "That's it."

"We both know that's a lie." She sighed, crossing her arms over her chest, "After the other night, it's pretty clear how he feels about you."

"I can't deal with this right now." I groaned, not wanting to relive any past moments with the boy that had made it difficult enough to go on with my daily schedule. I didn't want to talk about him anymore. I didn't want to hear his name or think about him at all. I just wanted to leave. I wanted to make him go away completely, but before I could even take another step toward the exit, she came blocking my path.

"I had him first you know?" She blurted out, eyes flaring in anger and pain, "I made him who he is. I gave him all of this!" She shouted, tears surfacing in her eyes as she stood in front of me.

"I know." I nodded, avoiding her painful gaze to dodge the hatred she tried aiming toward me.

"He told you, didn't he?" She choked out, carefully wiping away tears that had begun to slip, "I thought he was different. I thought he cared about me. . ."

"He does care about you." I told her, hoping she'd listen and let me go without anymore trouble. "He never wanted to see you hurt. That was why he was so willing to go along with everything you told him."

"Not everything. . ." She said quietly and trudged backwards to lean against the bathroom stalls, "When I first met him he was so obedient. He was my friend, but he listened to everything I said. I thought that he'd be _it_ for me."

"Stacy. . ."

"He was my first, you know?" Her words struck me hard in a sensitive area I myself couldn't understand. I didn't want to listen to this, and my shot at escape was right there during her moment of weakness. . . but something kept telling me to stay. If not for my sake, then for hers because she felt a lot like me. She lost something she could never get back, and she felt toyed with for no reason. All because of some guy. . .

"I gave him everything that made _me_ in order to make _him_. My friends, my popularity, heart, and body. I gave it all to him. . ."

"I'm sorry. . ." I knew it would take more than an apology from me, and it probably meant nothing because it _was_ me. But I hated seeing someone this way. To have been betrayed by the one person you thought you knew best. . .

"I thought that I could be enough for him." She cried, sliding to the floor in tears as she thought back to the redhead in her memories, "I loved him. So why couldn't it be me?" She looked up at me, tears running down her face as if she were waiting for an answer in how to win him over. But there was nothing. If anyone had to choose between us, she would have been the better choice. So, I couldn't understand why he didn't want her in that way. . .

Because I wasn't _him_.

"I'm sure the two of you can still-"

"Don't mock me." She said tonelessly, wiping away tears after calming herself down and getting back up on her feet, "You and I both know the only one he wants in this city is you."

"You're wrong." I said sternly, staring straight into the blondes eyes without harboring any fear toward her at all, "We would never work."

"And why not?" She glared.

I thought back on the reasons, because I knew there should have been a million. There was always something that drove me away from him, because it was impossible for us. I just couldn't tell her those reasons. Not all of them at least. The redhead, he was free for instance. He was happy, even when things were bad. He was like a child, or a puppy. He was always smiling, always optimistic, and that's why we always clashed. It was annoying having someone always trying to find the silver lining in everything, because there was none to my life. There was only good and evil, and the universe made it clear on which side we needed to stand on. This was where I belonged, where I was needed, because this was home. . .

"You've met me. . ." I laughed, ignoring the bitter feeling at the pit of my stomach, "I'm no good for him. I can't give him what he wants or make him happy. I'm completely useless to him. . ." And that was it. In the end, it would always be just that. I wasn't worthy enough, I couldn't ever satisfy him or be whatever it was he craved. I couldn't because I was me, because I was jinx and that meant. . .

I was bad luck.

"Well I think that's up for him to decide." She muttered under her breath and walked over to face me, "I'm calling defeat, here. That takes a lot for someone like me. So, I hope you can understand that hurting him in anyway is something I won't stand for. . ." This was a threat, her own personal warning, before she turned for the exit and finished by saying;

"Appreciate where you stand, _freak_. Because I know a dozen other girls who'd kill to be in your position. . . even me." She stopped for a moment, opening the door and turning to me before heading out to say, "I have faith in you though. You drive him to make better decisions. That's something I could never do. . . " And with that she took her leave and left me there to drown in my own thoughts.

She was insane. That much was clear, but I myself had no right to judge her on that. She might have been beyond crazy, but it was for a reason that made her appear far more sane in comparison to my own. But she just didn't get it, where I stood, where he stood, and how that separated us. He was the enemy, he'd always be, and I couldn't change that overnight or even years from now. What we wanted were two different things, and that's why it'd never work. Even if she was right about him, even if part of me did feel the need to see him again, I fought against that. I'd have to if I wanted to beat him. And I _had_ to beat him, but maybe that would have been easier. . .

If I hadn't come back here at all.

I shook my thoughts away and headed for the exit, stepping out of the girls room to return back into the halls. Whether or not it was a good idea to return I was still here. I made my decision and I was going to stick with it, not for terra, or my team, but for me, because I didn't want to let myself down. I wanted to prove that I was different, that I was stronger. As long as I steered clear from him, then I'd be safe. As long as I cut him out of my life I wouldn't be affected. I'd beat him at his own game. That was what I thought, what I felt sure about, but when it came right down to it. . .

I was at a loss again.

 _"Rose!"_

There it was. The sound of his voice that made my heart flutter every time. And when I whipped around to face him again, I knew he had won this round. I'd keep fighting against it, I'd ignore him whenever I could, but I'd be lying if I said he meant nothing to me - because he did. My feelings, my chest, my thoughts were centered on him and I hated that. I hated how he affected me. I hated how easy it was for him to bring me right back to this. I hated it, because I could feel him there. Somewhere inside, he was always there, and that ticked me off because it brought me to realize that maybe all of this, us, everything. . .

 **Had been out of my control all along.**


	41. Chapter 40: Step By Step

_**Let Me Love You** _

_(Glee Cover)_

 _Had no example of a love_  
 _that was even remotely real_  
 _How can you understand_  
 _something that you never had?_  
 _Ooh baby if you let me,_  
 _I can help you out with all of that_

 _Girl let me love you_  
 _And I will love you_  
 _Until you learn to love yourself. . ._

* * *

 **Chapter 40: Step By Step**

 **Kid flash**

Today was different. It _felt_ different. I mean, I wasn't expecting it to be the same either way. I just didn't think I myself would feel _different_. It wasn't entirely bad, but I couldn't say it was a good thing either. All I knew was that the moment I stepped onto campus, people looked at me differently. They didn't say anything or stare for too long, but I knew they were watching me from time to time. It was like, I wasn't me anymore. I was free but. . .

I wasn't me?

"West!" And there it was. The voice of one of the two who thought they were close enough to approach me again. The guys I'd been siding with since day one, yet never shared any real bond with them because the guy they knew wasn't me. Not now or ever. . .

We were just strangers.

"Whats up?" I tried playing casual. If anything, I was hoping it'd be like our regular conversations of small talk and leave it at that.

"You didn't come into practice yesterday?" Jake questioned me. A teammate, a bully, and in his mind probably a friend.

"Oh yeah, I got held up with something at home." I lied, shrugging my shoulders.

"Listen, about the dance..." Gary brought up immediately, getting right to the point as always.

"We didn't know that you and the Adam's frea-c _hick_ were an item?"

"Why didn't you ever tell us?" Jake glared, running his fingers through his hair in an unappealing manner.

"Look if you have a problem with it then-"

"Dude that's not even it." He cut me off.

"We just wanted to apologize." Gary said, lowering his eyes, "We knew about Stacy's prank, but we didn't think you'd get so pissed off by it. . ."

"I know. . ." I sighed, trying to better understand the two when I myself had lied to them in the past. It was my own ignorance that brought all of this to occur in the first place. Which meant I couldn't be upset with either of them. . . "But guys I can't keep doing this anymore. I'm not gonna keep going along with everything you _or_ Stacy want all the time."

"So does that mean you're quitting the team?" Jake asked.

"If I have to then yeah. High schools not gonna last forever, you know?"

"Do you like her?" The question came out so suddenly that I myself wasn't sure who it was that had asked. It put me in an awkward position that I never expected to be placed in. To think, that I could actually answer something like that honestly and actually mean it. It was just strange. But it was a good kind of strange. . .

Because it was about Rose.

"Yeah. . ." I nodded, "Yeah I do."

There was a long pause and the occasional glancing of the eyes exchanged between the other two. This would be it. Their decision would determine my fate at this school. The expectations felt obvious at first, either shun me or group me with the rest of the other dweebs because to them I was a traitor. And I accepted that. I'd hurt a lot of people in the process, I lied to many in the past, I deserved the worst. I did. But I wasn't prepared for what they were going to say next. . .

"Look, we don't care who you date. We never did." Jake groaned, scratching the back of his neck nervously, "That's why we never bothered you when you went chasing after all the girls on the spirit squad. But -"

"But we're you're friends!" Gary shouted, making all heads turn to listen to where I would now rank at this school. It was shocking honestly. After all I had done, people still wanted me around. Or more like, they actually _cared_. To me, the guys had been nothing more but a cover up to hide my true character. Which was why I never expected for them to think so highly of me. . .

Even now.

"At least, we thought we were." Jake shrugged and stepped away, offended by my behavior in the past, "You should have just been honest with us."

"I'm sorry. . ." Those words seemed so familiar on my tongue, almost like they'd been programmed into my brain after saying it so many times. It almost disgusted me. . .

"Whatever, we can just talk about this during practice."

"Wait, you guys still want me on the team?" I asked, dumbfounded by the odd turn the entire conversation was leading me toward.

"Dude, you're our MVP. We _need_ you on the team." Jake stared, bored and annoyed by my even asking.

"But we are a _team_." Gary reminded me, "Which means you should trust us more."

"Thanks guys. . ." I nodded, hoping to break the awkwardness that hung between us as the two patted my shoulders and continued down the hall on their own.

In the end, there was really nothing for me to fear to begin with. I still had everyone's respect, I could still be me and not have to worry about what others thought. I'd survived that, now came the hard part. . .

Facing her again.

Yeah, it was terrifying not knowing how others would treat me when I came back, but what I really dreaded was seeing how she'd react if we met again. The chances of her returning were slim, but there was still a _chance_. I just needed to be ready for it. I needed to be ready to say what needed to be said. . .

But what about everything else? I told her I'd be honest with her, but I couldn't tell her everything I knew or discovered. So, would that be a lie? Would I be betraying her? Even if it was to protect her? That's what I needed to figure out. But I only assumed everything would flow out properly when I saw her again. And so, I went on walking down the hall with that in mind. Ready to tell her whatever I could to earn her trust back. . .

But then _she_ appeared.

"Stace. . ." I stopped to stare at the blonde wiping her tears away after stepping out of the girls bathroom. She jumped slightly at the sound of my own voice and painted a smile on her face when our eyes met.

"Well, if isn't mister MVP." She tried to joke, forcing herself again for my own sake. It was awkward without a doubt, but it was a lot more painful seeing her there. Playing a character made to hide the person behind a mask. . .

Just like me.

"Did something happen? Why are you-"

"Stop being nice to me Wally." She frowned, turning her gaze away from me, "Just stop."

 _'Stop'_ she said, but the tears in her eyes begged for the opposite. This wasn't suppose to be how it ended. I wasn't planning on cutting her off like this _ever_ , because out of all the people I'd hurt _she_ was the most effected. I had toyed with her, not intentionally but that didn't matter. I hurt her. And I couldn't fix that. I couldn't be what she needed, and I hated that. . .

Because she hated me too.

"I understand." I spoke firmly, watching her redirect her eyes from the floor to the lockers.

"You don't have to worry about me anymore." She forced out a laugh, twisting her hair with her finger, "I'm not some stupid kid who needs you to take care of me all the time."

"But I did - care about you, I mean." My words caught her attention and her eyes immediately whipped back to meet mine, "You might not believe me, but I did love you Stacy. It just wasn't the way you wanted me too. . ."

"Right." She nodded, smiling softly before walking over to my side to whisper, "Now go, she'll need you now. . ."

" _She_?" I asked the blonde who tapped my shoulder and glanced over at the bathroom door swinging open.

Strands of dark hair swayed gracefully in an almost rhythmic pattern after stepping out in the hall. She walked away slowly, head down like always in avoiding meeting everyone else's stares. And they did stare, but not in the way she thought. She wasn't a dweeb anymore, or some freak, at least not to me. And seeing her in front of me so soon felt almost miraculous that it flooded my chest with a mixture of emotions. I wanted to race after her, to hold her and never let her go again because she came _back_. . . but then there was Stacy.

I watched the blonde leave us, striding down the halls confidently like the queen that she was. She owned this school, she started all of this, and I was glad I could have been a part of it - even if it meant sacrificing myself in the process. But not this time. I wasn't going to chase after the wrong person anymore. I wasn't going to put everyone else before me, before _Rose._ I hated all I'd done, but I had a reason for all of it. And that's why I wouldn't regret it anymore. I'd just have to say goodbye to it. To everyone else, because from here on out. . .

I'd only focus on _her_.

"Rose!"

My yelling caught not only her attention but the attention of everyone else. I could feel them watching me, judging us, and sending off negative waves from every corner, but I couldn't _see_ any of it. I knew they were there, I knew they were staring, but I couldn't see them, because it was just her. It was just us. Stopping to share a moment of simply staring deeply into each others eyes. It wasn't awkward or uncomfortable because my heart was just racing knowing that she was here again. She came back this time all on her own. . .

But that joyous moment didn't last. The bell rung and that soft gaze morphed into an irritated glare almost instantly. She was annoyed, and she was waiting for me to say something, but the words didn't flow out like I thought they would. When it came down to it, I had no idea what to say to her. Instead, I choked on my nerves and all I managed to do was wave and smile like an idiot just to say. . .

"Hi. . ." It wasn't my greatest moment, but I had so much to say to her that I didn't know where to start. I couldn't just come out and tell her how I felt or anything I'd learn the day before. She didn't even seem to care enough to greet me in return with the roll of her eyes before she continued walking. She was mad. Of course she'd be, our last run in wasn't one of our best. . .

But I wasn't going to let her go like that.

"W-Wait!" I panicked, holding onto my school bag to race over and block her path.

"What do you want?" She stopped to ask, staring up at me with the usual blank expression she carried frequently on campus.

"Well the usual, you know? Graduate, buy a car, go to college-"

"What do you want with _me_ , nitwit?" She asked harshly, eyes like shooting daggers jabbing right through me.

"I was hoping to get you to laugh first. . ." I scratched my head nervously and smiled to break the ice, but she shoved right past me to head in the direction for biology.

"Stop wasting my time. You're only going to make us both lat-"

"I don't care." I cut her off, gripping her arm to pull her right back to where she'd been standing.

"Why do you keep doing this?" She asked loudly, punching my arm to try and break free on her own.

"I told you why." I tried holding on tighter, waiting for her to give up as she raised her eyes to meet mine again in defeat. They were cold, distant even, but there was something else there too. It was almost vulnerable despite her efforts in putting up a tough front, because she knew exactly what I was referring to. . .

"I'm sorry, but I can't return your feelings." She inhaled deeply, voice shaking as she told another lie she refused to own up to, "It's better if we just forget everything we-"

"That doesn't work for me."

"What are you hoping to gain from this?"

"You." My response was instant, because there was no doubt in my mind what I wanted at this point. "I thought that was obvious." She could lie all she wanted, that didn't matter to me. I'd told plenty of those in the past myself. But I wasn't going to hide this much from her, and even if she refused me the soft blush forming in her cheeks gave her away immediately. And that's why I wasn't going to give up, because I wanted to be exactly what I craved from _her_. I just wanted to keep her here, all for myself. It was selfish and even greedy, but I was fine with that because it wasn't one sided. I wanted her to be the same. I wanted her to be honest with me, to be selfish on her own terms because I'd listen. I'd listen to all of it. . .

Just as long as it was her.

"Are you so bored that you have no one better to mess with?" She yanked away, voice cracking as she took two steps backward.

"I'm not messing with you, Rose. I'm just not as eager to give you up that easily."

"Well you're gonna have to." She hissed, continuously trying to draw a line between us based on something we couldn't control. And that's when it hit me. She wasn't speaking to me as the dweeb, because she was only seeing me as the enemy. One of the 'do-gooders' she hated. That's what was messing us up, what was drawing us away from each other. I just needed to get her to see that I wasn't the real threat here. . .

I never was.

"Don't you think it's odd at all?"

"What?" She squinted, forming a fence with her arms by placing them over her chest.

"You didn't have to come to this school, you didn't even have to show up today, but you did."

"Your point?" She shrugged, staring at me coldly.

"I think there's a reason for it. I mean, of all the places and people in the world why are we the only ones that keep getting pulled back?"

"What? You're a believer in fate now?" She laughed mockingly, dropping her hands to turn around and leave.

"I don't know what to believe in!" I shouted, trying to get her to stay for as long as I could with what it was I truly thought, "But I know how I feel. And I know you feel something too. . ."

There was another moment of silence. Another moment of us just staring at one another, because she had nothing to say just yet. She couldn't deny it, not right away anyway, because she knew I was right. There was something. Something between us that she made seem as if it were almost forbidden. Like it were a greater crime to accept me then anything else. . . and then the bell rung again. That was how she was able to retain her expressionless gaze and annoying attitude.

"We're late." She said quietly and turned to leave again.

"Stop running away from me!" I screamed, annoyed by the entire situation always going her way. She was always taking charge of everything, never leaning on anyone alone and that pissed me off. It pissed me off because I was here. I was ready for her to rely on me more, to not feel the need to keep lying about all of this when it was so clear. Still, I wasn't expecting her to suddenly freeze down the hall in reaction to my outburst. . .

"What are you hoping to hear, Wally? What exactly do you want me to say?" She asked, her back facing me the entire time.

"I want you to be honest with me."

"I _have_ been honest!" She shouted, whipping around and flailing her arms defensively.

"Then say it, right now." I breathed, my inside shaking as I slowly approached her in demand, "Look me in the eyes and tell me that you don't feel anything for me."

She gazed up at me, breathing quietly during a long pause between us. She didn't want to say it, she couldn't, I could feel that and if she did then it'd be forced. I could see it through hazel eyes peeking through fake glasses. She was hesitating, she was debating, she was actually thinking about it and that made me feel slightly relieved. Although, I'd be lying If I said I didn't feel upset that she'd actually try considering lying to me again. To lie about us again. . .

"Fine." She said scornfully, staring me down as she opened her mouth to begin, "Here's the truth, West. I have never felt, nor will I ever _feel_ , anything toward -"

She needed a push. She needed something to get her to understand that this was real. That what we had was genuine. That's why I couldn't let her say it, not because it would have killed me to hear it but because it wasn't true. And so, I forced my way in this time. I pulled her forward without a second thought and let my lips crash over hers. It was fire, it was sweet, it was everything all in one. I knew how much she hated being forced, but if words couldn't reach her then actions would.

She resisted at first, trying to push me away until our body's were pressed against one another. She hit her back on the wall, holding herself up until she gave in on her own. This was how she'd understand. How she'd see the honesty in what we felt. That way she'd see I wasn't coming in to hurt her, because that had been the opposite of what I truly intended all along. I just wanted her here, with me, by my side, safe and protected. And I'd protect her at all cost, not just as a hero but as me - as West.

"Can you still say it now?" I carefully pulled away, resting my forehead over hers to stare into hazel eyes while listening to the sound of her breathing. I was expecting the usual reaction, a slap to the face, or in her finally admitting the truth but. . . it wasn't either of the two. Instead, she cried. She was shaking in my arms, tears seeping through as she shut her eyes and bowed her head in shame. . .

"Just stop. . ." She choked out, hiding her face in her hands.

"Rose-"

"Stop calling me that!" She screamed, her expression unseen as she mumbled, "Why can't you understand?"

"What more is there to understand?" I shook her shoulders desperately.

"That it can't work!" She screamed, roughly pushing me away to wipe her tears and stare back up at me, "We can't change where we stand, and I won't sacrifice my family or myself for any of this. I won't. . ."

She was torn and she was hurting. All because of me, because she felt forced to choose. But who was I to make her decide. It's not that it ever mattered to me where she stood when I first met her, but at the time I hadn't expected to fall this hard for her. . .

Still, it wasn't my place to decide. It wasn't up to me to force her to pick between me and those she loved. It wasn't right, and if that meant keeping everything else a secret, about rouge, and everything then so be it. I wouldn't do it if it meant seeing her cry that way, because I didn't want to hurt her again. And that's exactly what I'd be doing if I couldn't give her time to see it herself. And so, I'd wait for her to realize her crimes on her own. If I played it right, then I was positive she'd switch sides eventually because she wasn't a monster. She wasn't evil or bad in anyway, she had goodness in her and if I could see that then she could too. Maybe not now, but if I could show it to her then she'd see it for herself one day. For now, none of that needed to be involved in this. All I wanted to focus on was her, us, not kid flash or jinx, but us. The _real_ us.

Because that's all that mattered.

"Then don't. . ."

"What?" She sniffled, puzzled by my words.

"Don't choose between us." I began, slowly moving in to be near her again, "I'm not asking you to give anything up, because I'm not coming to you as your enemy. I'm speaking to you as me, as Wally, as _Rudolph_."

"That's still. . ." She shook her head, hesitant as I reached forward to cup her cheek.

"No one has to know about us, Rose. Not your teammates or the titans, or even your mother. Just us, here, like we've been doing all along. . ."

"It won't work. . ." She murmured, repeating the same thing like a broken record out of fear.

"Why not?" I asked, wiping away tears sliding down her cheek, "Why can't we at least try? If we can't be together out there, then why can't we enjoy it _here_. Like this? Please. . ." I whispered and gently placed a hand under her chin to pull and redirect her gaze, "Be with me."

She didn't say anything and she didn't have to. She was waiting for me to do something, I could sense it, and I acted on it before she tried denying it. She kept her eyes open at first, not showing any emotion through them as I leaned forward to kiss her again. I hated seeing her that way, seeing her so broken to the point that she needed to question my every move. But I could feel her trust in me slowly growing after her lids shut in response. It was short, it was simple, but it was sincere. And I tried so hard to show my love for her through that one kiss, because I knew if I told her just how strongly I truly felt then she'd doubt me. If I said I loved her now, she'd think of it as a lie. This, us, it needed time. I needed to be patient or risk losing her all together. This was enough for now, she was more than enough. Which side we belonged to, where she stood, that didn't matter here. Good or bad, none of that mattered now, because I had her - because I loved her. Probably for a lot longer than I thought at first, but I knew this was real. My love for her was real, and until she could see that, until she could feel it and learn to love herself, then I'd wait for her. I'd wait forever if I had to, because I knew in time it would all fall into place. . .

Right?

"Hey, you two! Why aren't you in class yet?" One of the proctors yelled from the end of the hall, making us both jump and pull away immediately.

"Sorry, we're heading there right now." I laughed, waving at the man before I was shoved by the girl heading in the other direction for class.

"I told you we'd be late." She spat angrily, face burning red as I followed her in the same direction.

"Sorry. . ." I tried laughing again, moving closer in to reach down and grab her hand in mine, "It was worth it though." She flinched at my touch, but continued walking as I held her close. She didn't resist me this time, even when our fingers interlocked. She just stayed serious, as if it were a regular thing at this point. And that was enough for me. Being able to hold her this way, to be this close to her, it was more than I could ever ask for because I knew it was just starting. This was just the first step into something far greater, something we would both gradually adjust to. Until one day when hesitance and nervousness would no longer exist between us. When that day came I knew she'd be able to trust me completely, because this. . .

 **This was just the first step.**


	42. Epilogue

_**I Think I'm In Love** _

_(Kat Dahlia)_

 _I think I'm in love again_  
 _(My head, yeah, you're in my head)_  
 _I didn't think it could be true_  
 _Let alone that it would be you_  
 _I think I'm in love again_  
 _(I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love)_

* * *

 **Epilogue:**

 **Jinx**

It was quiet. No one said anything, though they did stare often, but for the most part - it was quiet. My day had gone down peaceful and without bother from anyone for the first time since my enrollment. It felt odd, and I myself felt out of place, but it was somewhat relaxing knowing I didn't have to keep my guard up every second I was here. . .

But that didn't change anything out there.

 _"And you call yourself a villan? Pathetic."_

It was without a doubt that I had slipped up more than once, and that nearly ruined all chances of rising among the rest. But if I wanted to win this I'd need to work harder. I'd need to prove to that woman that I wasn't the same kid she left behind years ago. I wouldn't remain as the forgotten child abandoned out of shame. Proving that to her, proving ourselves worthy, that's what matter. That was our goal but. . .

What about **him**?

 _"No one has to know about us, Rose. Not your teammates or the titans, or even your mother. Just us, here, like we've been doing all along. . ."_

 _"Please. . . be with me."_

I was being selfish. No worse; greedy. I walked into something that would endanger not only my teammates, but me. I swore never to get attached, and part of me kept trying to convince myself that it was just part of the plan. That I was only using the redhead to manipulate both sides and win against them. . . but that was a lie. I was fooling myself by trying to cover up my own feelings for him, and I knew that - I did. . .

I just couldn't say it.

How could I? When it felt like I'd be betraying everyone else in doing so. I knew his secret, I knew his weakness, and if the others had hid something like that from me I would have been furious. Which was why I knew they'd hate me if they found out about this. If they found out about _us_. But I couldn't walk away from him. I tried and failed miserably so many times before that it felt pointless now. I was drawn to the idiot for reasons I couldn't understand. All I knew was that if I left now, if I abandoned him this time. . . it would hurt. And I was tired of hurting. I was tired of losing and having to settle for what I thought I _deserved_. Why couldn't I have more? Why couldn't I have him? Why couldn't I just be happy this one time? Here, in this place, where no one could find us. Just this once. . .

Let me be selfish.

"Rose." Someone called, knocking on my locker to announce their presence.

"You. . ." I stared at the girl standing and smiling away as if she hadn't done anything wrong. "You have a lot of nerve." I hissed and slammed my locker shut in hopes of scaring her away. But she didn't move. She didn't even flinch. No matter what I did she kept sticking onto me like an annoying piece of gum on the bottom of my shoe. I hated her. I hated her and I wanted her to know that. . .

But I could never say it out loud.

"He told you, didn't he?" She laughed nervously, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear to play the whole thing off as if it were no big deal.

"Why would you say anything in the first place? Do you realize what you could have jeopardized if he -"

"You didn't give me a choice." She spoke firmly, eyes piercing right through me in a way that was different from her usual behavior, "I know you're upset, but I didn't know who else to turn to in order for me to explain that-"

"That what? You weren't a threat? That I could trust you?"

"Yes." She nodded.

"Well, I got that. Now it's time for you to get something too." I stepped forward, arms folded over each other, "I know you're not a threat or my enemy, but sharing the same blood doesn't make us family. So, respect my wishes and leave me _alone_."

And there it was. The same pained look she tried masking with a smile. She was hurting. I was hurting her. All because she refused to see everything else through. She knew my secret, she knew who I was, and yet she wouldn't go away. She couldn't see that all of it was for her own sake. As long as she clung onto me then she'd never be happy. If she wanted to be safe then this. . .

This was the only way.

"Fine. . ." she shuddered, wiping tears forming in her eyes, "I'm sorry for the trouble I caused you." She smiled again and nodded before she moved past me down the hall.

I didn't look back. I didn't watch her leave either. I couldn't, because she wasn't the only one in pain. I would have given anything for a restart. A life where we could have been brought up together, closer, like sisters should. But that wasn't the case. We were separated. We were strangers. It was better we understood that now then later. This. . .

This was for the best.

"Yo!" The annoying shout from a familiar redhead caught me by surprise after he snuck up to poke me from behind.

"Idiot!" I reacted furious by his approach and responded with smacking him hard across the head. "Don't do that!" I pointed.

"Ow! What happened to your feline instincts?" He glared, rubbing his head to sooth his own pain.

"What do you want, West?" I asked, picking up my bag from off the floor to head out for the day.

"Why'd Linda come over?" He nudged, glancing in the direction she had taken to leave campus.

"Nothing important." I shrugged.

"You should really cut her some slack, ya know? She really was worried about you."

"I'm sure. . ." I muttered, rolling my eyes at the teen, "Is that why you came here?"

"No." He smiled and pulled his school bag forward to reach in and pull out a sheet of paper, "Guess who got a B on Fisher's test?"

" _Really?_ " I raised both brows, amazed by the redheads improvement in the class since the beginning of the semester.

"I know, I'm a genius. What you get?" He asked while slipping the paper back into his bag.

"An A."

"Liar." He gaped at me as I pulled out my sheet from the binder in my hand.

"See for yourse-"

"When did you get this?" He immediately asked, yanking the paper out of my hand to examine closely.

"During Lunch." I shrugged and quickly pulled my test sheet back.

"You spent your lunch in class?" He squinted at me as I slid the paper in my binder and back in my bag.

"I just happened to run into him when I was working on my art."

"Why spend your break hiding behind a canvas when you can spend it with me?" He stared down at me, crossing his arms over one another as I pondered on the thought.

"Let me think, spend my free time painting or with a guy too busy eyeing every other chick on campus with a loud group of people surrounding him. . ." I held up both hands as a scale and used them to weigh the ideas shared with him, "Gee, you're right. I have _no_ idea what I was thinking." I said sarcastically, patting his shoulder before moving past him to leave.

"Hey," I heard him say before yanking me back by the straps of my bag, "That's not fair."

"And neither is this!" I shoved him off, annoyed as I readjusted the straps, "Stop pulling me around all the time!"

"Sorry." He held up his hands defensively, "But you can't seriously think I'd go looking at other girls with my girlfriend in the roo -"

We both froze. The two of us baffled by what he had said as we turned our gaze away from one another in embarrassment. It wasn't a big deal or anything, even if it was him. I guess, part of me just hadn't expected to be labeled so soon. And he had said it so casually, that it sort of, almost, kind of, made me feel. . . slightly. . .

Happy.

"G-Girlfriend?" I repeated the title and kept my head down as I waited for a confirmation, aware of the blush forming over my cheek on its own.

"You know what I mean. . ." He cleared his throat, and I couldn't help but laugh at how nervous he had gotten as well. It was nice. It was nice just being like this. Something I thought was impossible in this lifetime he managed to create with his own power. And I liked that. . . because I liked him.

Even if I couldn't say it just yet.

"Okay, I was wrong." I smiled, "I'll hang out with you next time." I muttered and turned for the direction of the exit.

"What?" He gasped jokingly, racing over to catch up, "Did I hear correctly? Did Rose Adam's just admit that she was _actually_ wrong?"

"Drop dead, West." I rolled my eyes at the idiot following me from behind.

"Brat."

"Pest."

"Hey!" He playfully pushed me, making us both laugh at our own immaturity. That's the thing I felt drew me in more. The fact that he was able to make me release everything even for a moment. I could be more than myself around him, because I felt more like a kid again. As ridiculous as it might have sound, it was relaxing. To be able to say whatever I wanted and not be judged in anyway. It was fun, it was peaceful and warm. Something I lacked in growing up as a child myself. And that's why it was so hard to walk away. . .

"What about today?" He suddenly asked after placing an arm around my shoulders. I normally would have reacted differently if it had been someone else. The idea of being touched by that of the opposite sex had disgusted me in the past. But I don't think it was about the redhead being male or female. To me, he was just Wally. A complete idiot most days. . . but he was kind. That's why I couldn't fear him.

"What _about_ today?" I looked up at him.

"Lets go somewhere and celebrate."

"Celebrate what exactly?" I raised a brow, confused by his approach in wanting a reason to spend another day after school together again.

"I dunno. That we're both passing Bio this semester?"

"Passing a class is a requirement. A reward shouldn't be needed."

"Well, there's that and then there's _us_. . ." He paused for a moment, retrieving his arm to step in front of me, "Our first date, whataya say?" He smiled, speaking so casual that it seemed almost natural to him. I mean, of course it'd be. This was a regular thing for the redhead. It was me that lacked in experience when it came to situations like these. . .

"I-I guess I could hang out for a little while. . ." I stuttered, fidgeting as I stared at my own two feet on the ground.

"Great! I know the perfect place to head to. It'll only take us five seconds with my speed if I carry-"

"You're not carrying me anywhere." I stopped him, holding a hand up to his face to better make my point.

"It's not like I'd drop you? You're thinner than a _pencil_. . ." The angry stare I gave him brought him to feel nervous as he laughed to better end his sentence, "A really cute pencil?" He smiled, bringing his hands out to hold me before I pushed past him to head for the door.

"We'll take the bus."

"The bus isn't heading where we're going." I heard him say from behind as he tried to match my pace.

"Then we'll take the train."

"That's already too far." He whined.

"Okay, then we'll take the bus to the train."

"You want to spend money on two vehicles?"

"You're not carrying me there, West!" I yelled, putting my foot down to bury the thought of him even trying.

"Fine..." He pouted, following me outside until he came to an abrupt stop, "oh! wait here." He told me before he zipped over to meet with someone outside.

They spoke for a few minutes, some boy I had never seen before holding a blue bicycle as they laughed and joked around. I watched the two in aggravation as seconds passed, wanting so badly to take back my agreement and head home on my own instead. But I waited. I had to wait. Why? I wasn't sure myself. But I waited, just until the redhead waved me over after the boy handed over his bike and headed in the direction of the bus stop alone.

"I found our ride." He smiled after I had made my way to him at the front of the school.

"A _bike_?"

"Yeah, now get on." He nodded cheerfully and patted the rack on the rear of the bike for me to sit on.

"I-I don't think that's a good idea. . ." I stepped away, laughing nervously to better hide how I felt about the situation all together.

"What? scared of riding?"

"No!" I shut my eyes in embarrassment at how quickly I came to answer that, because I knew I'd given myself away right there. He had already started staring at me in suspicion. Which made the entire conversation ten times more humiliating. . .

"Have you ever even ridden on a bike?" He asked, tilting his head to one side.

"Of course I have. . ."

"Oh, okay then." He grinned menacingly as he stepped back and waved for me to move in, "You pedal then. Unless you're scared?" He was mocking me, trying to see me sweat. And it probably would have been better if I had just told him the truth right there, but it was my own pride that stood in the way of that completely. . .

"F-Fine." I held my head up high and pushed past the teen to move forward. I was hesitant at first, I knew that, and I knew it was obvious to him too. But I didn't back down. I forced myself to get on, moving one leg over to sit on top of the seat that kept me off the floor. I felt slightly proud of myself as I sat with one foot placed on the pedal. I was convinced I could really go through with it, seeing that even children managed to do it alone, but the moment he sat behind me. . .

I was stuck.

I couldn't bring myself to start moving. My own useless fear clouded everything else around me and forced me to stay in place. It was humiliating, embarrassing, and it felt like one of my worst moments yet. So, I shut my eyes and prepared for the redhead to burst out in laughter and make fun of me for another weakness he'd discovered. I waited. I waited for his reaction, for him to crack another one of his stupid jokes but. . . he proved me wrong.

"C'mon lets switch." He tapped my shoulder and got off the seat for me to move. His expression was blank, and it was difficult to read him at all in that moment. And when I moved to the back to sit behind him, he remained silent. Just until he reached for my arms and pulled them around his own waist to keep me closer. . .

"You better hold on tight if you dont want to fall."

"I-I know that!" I said loudly, and then, finally, he started to laugh. But it wasn't harsh. It wasn't made to make fun of me. It was just his laugh. A soothing laugh that seemed almost capable of erasing all worries away from my mind. . .

And it was nice.

"Oh, before I forget!" He suddenly burst out, reaching into his pocket to pull out a black mobile phone to hand over. "Don't lose it this time." He said and waited for me to take the device I then recognized as the phone he'd given me the night at his place.

"I didn't lose it!" I yelled, snatching it from his hand to slide into my bag.

"Whatever you say, sunshine." I opened my mouth to respond to that horrendous choice of a nickname, but before I could say anything else he took off riding.

I yelped in fear as we began moving, and my arms clung onto him tightly in response to my fear. I sat behind him trembling at the beginning. Hoping that we'd arrive quickly to wherever he was taking us. I wanted it to be over, to be on the ground once again where it was safe and balanced. . . and then I saw the sky. It was moving in a way I'd never noticed before. It's clouds soft and white allowed sunlight to seep right through them. It was warm. It was relaxing. Even the branches of leaves appeared far more beautiful as the light came peeking through them. Almost like stars in the night sky. And I had never noticed how warm the redhead felt being held this way. His back, it was warmer than I thought it would be. And as I placed my head over it I shut my eyes and thought to myself. . .

How nice it would be if this could last forever?

"You don't have to be brave around me all the time." The redhead spoke with an expression I couldn't see from behind, "If you're scared you can tell me. I'll listen to everything, but I won't know unless you say it. . ." His words made everything inside me heat up all at once. Even with the wind blowing against us, it wasn't cold anymore. It wasn't dark anymore. And although I knew this wouldn't last forever, I couldn't help but smile as I clung onto him even tighter. Because I knew that even if this couldn't be real, we could still play pretend. And that was nice sometimes, because it almost seemed like hope itself could exist again. Even if it was just for a while, it meant that I could be happy here. That all of this could exist just as long as it was kept between us. Our happiness, our feelings for one another, it could all exist. And as long as I was with him, then. . .

 _Rose Adam's_ could exist too.

"Thank you. . ." I whispered from behind, unsure if he had heard me or not. But even if my message couldn't be sent through words, then I was certain the wind would bring it back to him again. Then, maybe one day he'd hear just how much I truly cared about him. That way I wouldn't need to say it. . .

 **Because he'd already know.**


	43. Authors Note

**_Authors Note:_**

 _Please continue reading the rest of the story in the sequel. Chapter one will pick up right where we left off in the epilogue._

 _There's still a LOT MORE chapters left and that's why I decided to cut The Story You Never Knew in half and created a sequel. This changes nothing, and part 2 continues the rest of the story. I just thought that there were a LOT of chapters left so from here on out all future chapters will be posted in part two that you can read on my account._

 _So yeah, even though The Story You Never Knew is technically done it's NOT over._

 _There's still a lot more to Rose and Wally's story. A ton more drama - especially now that they're dating._

 _So, yeah. This story is still ongoing but I'm just gonna wrap up whats left in part 2. The sequal will be titled: **Say You'll Remember Me** and you can find it on my account RIGHT NOW._

 _Oh, and thanks to ANYONE who actually bothered to read this story. I didn't think anyone would actually enjoy reading all this craziness BUT if you did THANK YOU. And be prepared for a **TON** of drama in the next story._

 _See you soon._

 _-Clover_


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